Deliberation
Biased Ending
Word Count: 1,542
Rating/Warnings/ Summary: Same as chapter one
Author's Note: So... I kind of wanted something like this all along. I tried to keep things fair, but I'm sure I didn't.
I know it would be more fair to do endings for all the guys, but I'm not sure I could write them. Maybe Ikki's? Not sure. I guess if people were really interested in that, they could ask.
Anyway, this is very much Kent/Heroine, so if that's not your preference... just keep the other ending and imagine the pairing you prefer.
Biased Ending
The door to Kent's office opened, but he didn't look up. He'd put himself to work on his presentation, intending to focus on it alone until the memories were completely faded. He knew that they would go soon enough, as she'd told them all she'd made a decision and then asked for some more time alone with Orion before it happened.
He could not blame her for that. Her truest friend and ally in the situation had been Orion, and Kent found that he, too, felt some sort of... affection for the spirit. Not so strong as hers, and he'd likely offend either one of them if he admitted that it was sort of as one might view a pet.
He would not say that to anyone, though, so it was of little consequence.
"I thought you were working, Ikkyu. You said you wanted to stay busy and keep your mind off your fan club, as much as it may grow larger now that you are employed in such a manner."
"I think Ikki will be very popular," she said. "He has been in every world I've known him in."
Kent did look up then, bumping his chair into the desk and frowning as he did. He rubbed at his knee as he stared at her in confusion. "I don't understand. Why—how—you can't possibly be here. You said you made your decision. That meant... I... you said goodbye, did you not? And you took time with Orion and left."
She smiled. "I took time with Orion, as much as I could get, since I knew I had to say goodbye again, but he and Nhil were the only ones that I had to say goodbye to, unless I was to go to every other world and say goodbye to every version of each of you I knew."
Kent blinked. "Yes, that would be rather impossible a thing, but still... This wasn't your world. You were supposed to return to the one with Ukyo where you belonged."
She gave him a small smile. "Kent, in all your theories, did you ever have proof that I was from that world? Didn't you tell me that all Ukyo needed was to see me survive past the twenty-fifth? And remember, Nhil wasn't capable of bringing back the dead, only altering the perception of time."
Kent sat back, tensing up with her reminder. "That would suggest, then, that you were never from Ukyo's world at all. That you was dead. That... would never be undone, no matter what the wish. So... to suggest that you belonged in Ukyo's world... was a false assumption and would not have been sustainable."
"I think so," she said, "but I'm not as smart as you. I wanted to give you a logical reason, but I didn't really make my choice based on logic."
"You didn't?"
She shook her head. "I think I was denying something to myself all along when I came here."
"You were?"
She flushed. "I... Oh, this is embarrassing. I thought I was ready to say it, but it's harder than I thought, and I really do wish Orion was with me because he'd tell me to be brave, braver than I think I ever was with you, but the truth is... I didn't just think you were the safe choice or the logical choice."
He considered her words, trying not to make an impulsive decision based on them, even as the emotions inside him wanted to rush him toward a very rash action. He rose, walking around his desk, bumping it again as he did, but he ignored it to focus on her.
"Would it be too much to assume that those words mean that you... you have strong enough feelings for me to compel you to stay here, even if it is not your world?"
She nodded. "I mean, I think it is. Orion and Nhil told me I would make the right choice, and I wanted to, desperately. I wanted to make a choice that was good for everyone. I wanted to help them all. I still do. It's just... as much as you probably would have been the most capable of moving on without me in some ways—more so than Ukyo, I think, or even Ikki, if he didn't know the truth of his fan club—Shin would manage, but I worry about Toma and how far he'll go to protect someone—I mean, you could get by without me."
"In theory," Kent agreed, still bothered by the idea of her going. His emotions strongly disagreed with her assertion. "I would likely do as I have done, focus on research until I could not think of you any longer."
She nodded, biting her lip. "I know. I... I'm sorry. I'm doing this all wrong, but what I thought was... as much as you could probably get along without me, you were the one I didn't want to leave behind."
"What?" Kent winced at his own pathetic reaction, the disbelief in his voice, for she had been rather clear with that statement, unlike her usual stumbling. She had as much as said—but no, he didn't want to assume too much even as the likely proof was standing here in front of him.
If she was real, then what he wanted to believe, that was true, and he knew he would end up making a fool of himself again over her, wanting to hold her and not let go despite the many reasons why he should and that was inappropriate.
"I suppose I should say it first, as I held back before, not wanting to influence your decision as well as somewhat uncertain of the depth and veracity of my feelings, but I do believe I love you. Not in any way that is rational or reasonable, but in a near desperate state where I would show you many pathetic displays of that same emotion now." He grimaced, refusing to give into the temptation to tell her that he would very much like to marry her someday. "You do not have to say that you—"
"I've been trying to," she said, blushing even redder than before. "I really have been, but I'm not any good at this, either. I just... I talked a lot with Orion, and the more I did, the more I was sure that I wasn't just hesitating because I was afraid of making the wrong choice—I was afraid of making the right choice."
"That seems a bit... contradictory."
She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him. "I love you, Kent. I'm sorry I wasn't honest about it. I was confused after all those other worlds, and I wanted to tell myself it was just that you understood and remembered Orion, but it was more than that. I was just... to scared to admit it, even to myself, but every time I thought about leaving, I couldn't. And it hurt, when I hurt you. I hated myself for it more and more."
He embraced her tightly, not just because he still had some doubts she was real and telling him what he wanted to hear, but also because of the fears now rising in him. "If you remember more, you will know that I hurt you a great deal as well."
She looked up at him. "I'm not afraid of remembering. I think maybe I was, but not anymore. Orion and I talked a long time. He helped me see that even if I hadn't been sure before or had been upset by you in the past, things had changed. We both had changed. You had promised to be more open with me, and I saw how much you cared. You've learned so much, and so have I. I want to be with you, even if it's hard. You stuck by me even when I hurt you, and if you can do that... so can I. We can work through anything if you think about what we've already overcome."
He touched her cheek with a smile. "You may be exaggerating that, but it is true few couples have to deal with spirits, alternate worlds, or amnesia like we have. Perhaps more have been in the situation where there is an excessive amount of rivals for their love, but there is little precedence for spirits or alternate worlds."
"Somehow you sound proud of that."
"You have just said how unique our love is," he said. "Why should I not be proud?"
She smiled at him. "You're cute, Kent."
He flushed. Cute wasn't the word he'd use to describe himself, but she seemed pleased, so he did not argue her choice. "Having such a statistically improbable romance has its appeal in many ways. I shouldn't say it, I suppose, but if you think about it... this would need a lot of careful study and research, the sort that could take a lifetime."
"You mean you'd want to be with me forever?"
"Yes, that is precisely what I mean."
She sighed in contentment. "That's what I want, too. I'm so glad I didn't just go through that other door. This is where I belong. I'm sure of it now."
