Success

"-And so then Tyler did this really cute thing where he took his little teddy bear and tried to get a second cookie by saying it was for Mr. Stuffers," Sam told Carly as the two girls walked through the mall.

"That's adorable!" Carly said. "Aw, I miss having a little toddler in the house to do cute things for me."

"Clarissa's only six; she's still plenty cute," Sam pointed out.

"I know, but it's a different cute," Carly said. "There's just no cuteness like toddler cuteness."

"Then have another kid," Sam grinned.

"Um…I don't the cuteness quite enough to go through another whole pregnancy," Carly said. "Anyway, wanna go grab some salads at the food court? I'm starving."

"If by salads you mean fried chicken, then yes," Sam nodded.

"Well lucky for you they just put in a new Tub of Chicken next to the salad stand," Carly said. "So let's go!"

"Seriously, a new Tub of Chicken?" Sam said excitedly. "That's awesome! But when did they even do that? I was at the food court like, two weeks ago."

"Mall construction is pretty speedy, I guess," Carly shrugged. "I mean they take out old stores all the time and replace them with new ones before people even have a chance to miss the old place. It's just-whoa! Speaking of new places…"

The girls stopped in their tracks as they stared at an unfamiliar store with dark windows in front of them.

"Hey! This used to be my favorite candle store!" Carly exclaimed. "Aw man! Now my living room will never smell like Autumn Breeze again!"

"Tough luck, kid," Sam said.

"What store is this even?" Carly mumbled.

"I dunno, there's no sign," Sam said. "Wait, I think I see something on the window. It's a…oh."

"What?" Carly frowned.

"It's an Adult Shop," Sam said.

"Huh?" Carly said."

"You know…" Sam said. "An Adult Shop."
"Do they sell grown-ups or something?" Carly asked, confused.

"Oh my God," Sam laughed. "Carls, tell me you're not being serious right now. Do you really not know what that store is?"

"No, so will you just tell me?" Carly said. "It better be something pretty good to have gotten rid of my candles!"

"I can't believe I have to explain this to a chick who's over thirty years old," Sam sighed, shaking her head. "But…okay. An adult shop sells things that are, well, for adults."

"Wow, that was real informative," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Ugh, I'm really gonna have to spell it out for you, aren't I?" Sam said. "It sells stuff to spice up your sex life!"

Carly's eyes widened. "What?"

"Yup, sorry to crush your innocence," Sam said.

"Have you ever been in one of those stores?" Carly asked

"Nah, but my mom had a frequent member punch card," Sam said. "Growing up she'd always go to these stores and leave her bags down in the living room, so I was forced to get a very good idea of what they sell in there."

"And now I no longer want that salad," Carly cringed.

"Eh, the stuff isn't as bad as you would think," Sam shrugged. "I mean it wasn't fun to come across my mom's purchases when I was twelve years old. In fact I still have nightmares about that. But like I said, it's just a bunch of stuff that spice things up in the bedroom."

"Spice things up…" Carly said slowly. "Huh…"

"What? Do things between you and Andy need spiced up?" Sam grinned.

"No!" Carly said at once, her face turning bright red. "Well…Okay, it's not that things are bad in the bedroom for us. It's just….well we've been married eight years! We've kind of run out of new, er, things to try. Back when we were first together everything was so new and exciting and it just felt…amazing. You-You know what I mean?"

"Uh, Carls, Freddie and I have been married for over a decade, of course I know what you mean," Sam nodded. "Yeah, our sex life is great…well, really great. Like one time last week we-"

"How many times do I have to tell you I don't want to hear about you and Freddie doing that stuff?" Carly snapped.

"Oh, but I have to listen to you go on about you and Andy?"

"It's different, you didn't grow up with Andy," Carly said. "It's weird to think of your two best friends doing…that."

"Fine, fair enough, I'll spare you the details," Sam said. "But as I was saying, yeah, we're doing fine I guess, but nothing's really new anymore. I miss that feeling sometimes."

The two women were silent for a moment.

"So this store then," Carly said, clearing her throat. "It-It sells stuff to bring back that excitement?"

"Apparently, yeah," Sam nodded.

"Oh," Carly said.

"You know…" Sam said. "The kids aren't with us…it probably wouldn't do any harm for us to just go look around in there."

"No, it wouldn't!" Carly quickly agreed. "And as The Whicker Wonderland's former best customer, I should at least go see what replaced them."

"Exactly," Sam said. "It would be irresponsible not to go!"

….

"How can we have two hundred channels with nothing on?" Freddie moaned a week later as he sat on the couch in the Benson's living room, flipping through stations. "I finally have the house to myself and I can't even cherish the peace and quiet by watching T.V.!"

Just then the front door of the house opened and Carly's husband, Andy, walked in.

"Oh, hey Andy," Freddie said. "What's up?"

"Emma and Ashton left their stuffed animals over at our place when they slept over last night," Andy said, holding up a stuffed bunny and a stuffed monkey. "If they're anything like Clarissa, they won't go to sleep without these tonight, so I figured I should get them over here."

"Oh awesome, thanks a lot," Freddie said. "You're right; it would've been a nightmare trying to get the girls to sleep without Fluffles and Sir Bananas."

"No problem," Andy said. "Hey, cool if I hang out here for a little bit? Wi-Fi's down at my place."

"Sure, go ahead," Freddie said. "Sam took the kids to her mom's house for the afternoon anyway."

"Yeah I wondered why it was so quiet here," Andy chuckled, sitting down next to Freddie and letting out a long yawn.

"Tired?" Freddie smirked.

"Little bit," Andy nodded. "Clarissa is over at Spencer's for the day so Carly and I decided to spend the afternoon in bed-"

"Ah! How many times do I have to tell you, I don't want to hear about your guy's sex life?" Freddie snapped.

"I thought we were having, like, one of those 'dude' sessions right now," Andy frowned. "This is what guys talk about during those!"

"I don't care, I've known Carly since she was eleven, it's weird!" Freddie said. "It's like hearing about your sister or something."

"Oh…yeah that's gross," Andy frowned, shuddering. "Sorry. But, well, you know what I mean. Lately it's just been more tiring to do, er, that. But hey, I'm not complaining, and I'm sure you're not either, am I right?"

"What?" Freddie frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"Come on, don't play dumb," Andy grinned. "With all that new stuff I feel like I've just sprinted a marathon after Carly and I have sex. Oh, sorry…"

"New stuff?" Freddie repeated.

"That green thing is my favorite," Andy continued. "Did Sam get that too?"

"Okay, seriously, I have no clue what you're talking about," Freddie said.

"You know…" Andy said. "The stuff the girls bought at the mall the other day."

"The only thing Sam bought at the mall the other day was a snow globe with a tap dancing pig inside it," Freddie said.

"Huh?" Andy frowned. "That's not what I heard. You-You do know where Sam and Carly went at the mall, don't you?"

"Um, no," Freddie said.

"Oh jeez…" Andy said. "Well this is about to get awkward."

"You've already made it awkward by bringing all of this up!" Freddie said. "Now can you just tell me what you're talking about?"

"Um, well, Carly told me that the other day at the mall her and Sam went into this new, um, Adult Store."

Freddie blinked blankly. "Huh?"

"You know, an Adult Store," Andy said. "Where they sell certain items that are supposed to liven things up in the bedroom."

Freddie's eyes widened. "What? Sam went there?"

"According to Carly, yeah," Andy nodded. "And apparently she got some stuff too. Has she not shown any of it to you?"

"She has not!" Freddie exclaimed. "But-What-Why-Why would Sam think she needs stuff to liven things up? I-I thought we were keeping things pretty…lively."

"Hey, I was kind of thrown too when Carly first brought out that stuff," Andy said. "But then we used it…Dude, it's mind blowing. There are some things I didn't think were even possible! But with-"

"Okay, okay, I get it," Freddie said quickly. "But…well if Sam bought that stuff why wouldn't she show me so we could use it?"

"I don't know, but Freddie, I would try to find out soon, because I'm telling you…mind blowing," Andy said.

…..

"Alright…where would Sam hide this stuff?" Freddie asked himself later that day as he stepped into their bedroom. He still had a little bit of time before Sam and the kids got home, and he was hoping to find where his wife was keeping her purchases. He opened up their closet, but the only thing he found there was clothes and a half-eaten bag of pork rinds. He opened up the drawers of her bedside table, but again found nothing there.

"Where could she have hidden this?" Freddie frowned as he got down on his knees and looked under the bed. "Where could she have-"

"Dude, what are you doing?"

Freddie hit his head on the bed as he quickly scrambled to his feet and saw Sam standing in their doorway.

"Hey!" Freddie said, trying to act natural. "I-I didn't hear you come in! Where are the kids?"

"Downstairs in the living room," Sam said. "They're all worn out from my mom's place. She got a trampoline in her backyard from that acrobat she's dating this week. But back to my question…what were you doing on the floor?"

"I, um, dropped my contact lens," Freddie said lamely.

"Okay, that'd be a believable story if you wore contacts," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Now seriously, what were you doing? Oh…I swear, if you're still looking for that tiny photon laser that fell off your NugNug action figure, I'm going to-"

"That's not what I was looking for," Freddie sighed. "I-I was looking for something, though."

"Yeah, I gathered that," Sam said. "What?"

"I-I was-I was looking for the stuff you got at that Adult Store at the mall!" Freddie blurted out.

Sam frowned. "How did you know-"

"Andy came by earlier," Freddie explained. "He told me that Carly had said the two of you went there the other day at the mall."

"Oh…" Sam said. "Oh, um…yeah, we-we kind of did."

"And you did get stuff then?"

"Yeah, I-I picked up a couple of things," Sam said, her face bright red.

"Ah," Freddie said weakly. "But-But Sam I just don't get why you would do that. I-I really thought our sex life was great! I mean sure, it's not like we're twenty anymore, but I still thought we were-"

"No, no, no, baby, that's not it at all," Sam said quickly. "Our sex life is great! I mean there was that one time just a few weeks ago where we did it four times in one night!"

"A personal record for us," Freddie nodded, giving her a small smile.

"I didn't buy stuff from that store because I thought things between us weren't good," Sam said. "It's just, well, don't you think it'd be kind of fun to try some new things? I mean after over a decade we've kind of tried most things already. And like I said, it's all been great, but, you know, it's always nice to try out something new…"

"Oh…" Freddie said, relieved. "So-So there's nothing wrong with how we've been doing it. You just wanted to try some stuff out?"

"Yes!" Sam said.

"I see…" Freddie said. "Well then what gives, Sam?"

"What?"

"You've had whatever you got from that store for over a week and we haven't gotten to use them yet?" Freddie exclaimed. "That's not fair! Carly and Andy got to use their stuff!"

"Dude…"

"Let's go, we can use them right now!" Freddie said. "You said the kids were exhausted! I say we lock the door and-"

"We're not having sex at three in the afternoon with the kids right downstairs!" Sam said.

"We've done it before…" Freddie mumbled.

"Yes, and Jason almost walked in on us because he wanted us to watch a movie with him!" Sam reminded him. "If that door wasn't locked the poor kid would've been scarred for life!"

"Well why haven't we used what you got yet?" Freddie asked again.

Sam smiled and rolled her eyes. "What's in a week from tomorrow, nub?"

"A week from tomorrow?" Freddie repeated. "Um…I don't know…"

"Your birthday!" Sam said.

"Oh."

"Yeah, that-that stuff was gonna be part of your present, that's why I didn't tell you about them," Sam chuckled.

"R-Really?"

"Really," Sam nodded. "But…well since the surprise is kind of gone now, I guess there's no point in waiting until next week to try these things out. So how about tonight, after the kids are asleep, we go ahead and have some fun. It will be your early present."

"That sounds like a plan," Freddie said, grinning excitedly. "And it sounds like this will be one of the best presents I've ever gotten."