The Missions Between
Chapter 10: Seeking Time Alone
Lux had informed the group of a plan to attack a large target in the city. Ahsoka and the rest of the band of rebels was on board with the idea.
Ahsoka was hoping she would get some time alone with Lux to talk about things, at this point, she just wanted it out in the open for him. Everything was happening so fast that she really didn't have any time alone with him, so when the group split up, Ahsoka went with Steela, mostly to get a feel for her and what she was about.
Obi-wan and Anakin had left Onderon in Ahsoka's hands during this time. The rebels had just taken out the power generator for the droids that occupied the planet. Now it was time for some celebration that Obi-wan and Anakin both attended by hologram.
The group cheered as the Jedi watched them. Ahsoka was watching how Steela and Lux would interact with each other during this time of celebration.
"Come here you handsome senator." Steela lightly demanded as she walked over to him and embraced him with a very tender hug.
Ahsoka had a look of discouragement on her face and her focus was suddenly gone again.
Anakin leaned over to his love stricken padawan. "Ahsoka, remember what I said about staying focused." He said gently.
"I can't help it Master."
"I understand."
"You do?"
"I do. But try to remember, always put purpose ahead of your feelings." Anakin assured her.
Ahsoka's nerves began to settle down. She knew it wouldn't be easy to do this, but she needed to and so she would. But, in order for her to do this, she needed to get closure.
As the night drew in, the rebels settled in at their camp for the night.
Ahsoka watched Lux and Steela as they were parting ways for the night.
Lux gave Steela a small kiss. "Good night Steela."
"Good night Lux." She said as she then planted a kiss on him. Then she walked back to her tent and Lux went in to his.
This was the perfect time for Ahsoka to confront Lux on his sudden change of interest that had her heart racing ever since she arrived on Onderon. With confidence, she strolled on up to Lux's tent. "Lux, Lux can I speak with you?" she questioned.
Lux opened the curtain to see Ahsoka standing right there. "Of course Ahsoka, please do." He said holding one side of the curtain open so she could go in. "What do you need to talk about Ahsoka?"
She was silent for a moment and had one hand wrapped around her upper arm as she stood there staring slightly at the floor in preparation to speak. "Okay, I guess I should have prepared something first." She joked.
Lux let out a little chuckle as he walked over and sat down next to Ahsoka. "Ahsoka, you know you can tell me anything." Lux mentioned.
Ahsoka smiled and looked at Lux. "Okay, what's, exactly going on with you and Steela? I mean, I thought you and I shared a connection, ever since we met, we kept in touch and we even kissed and…"
She was interrupted by Lux's finger on her lips. "Ahsoka, I'm so sorry, things are a bit complicated right now. You were there when I needed you and I can't ever begin to take that for granted. While I don't regret our kisses on Carlac, I can't help but feel like I've violated your Jedi code." Lux said with a bit of sadness.
Ahsoka sat, trembling as he spoke, waiting for her turn to speak. She wasn't sure what she was going to say in response. Did she want to kiss him again? Did she want to try to change his mind? She just wasn't sure, she knew she wanted him to feel for her what she felt for him though she couldn't actually ever give in to him if she were to remain in the Jedi order. At this point in her life, she hated that rule and was somewhat frustrated by it, but she would never go around it. "Lux, there aren't enough words to describe how I felt when I saw you and Steela during that training, you were just all over her. Forget the Jedi code, it hurt me Lux!"
"I know Ahsoka, I feel I've hurt you more times than you deserve, and for whatever reason, we keep running back to each other."
"We keep running back to each other because we have something here, maybe there's something that can be done to change the minds of my elders, maybe they will allow it, somehow." Ahsoka suggested.
Lux wasn't sure how to react, he cared deeply for Ahsoka and there was no doubt about that, but he didn't want to betray Steela's trust either. He sat quietly for a moment. "Ahsoka, don't think for a moment that I forgot about how I feel about you, I just didn't want to put you in that place that would make you choose. I wouldn't allow that, I certainly wouldn't want you to choose me over the Jedi order." Lux mentioned.
"And why was that your decision to make Lux?" Ahsoka asked softly. "I don't need you to choose for me." She added.
Steela was walking to the camps mess hall to retrieve another blanket when she passed by Lux's tent. She noticed a lantern was still on and could see the silhouettes of a human male and the short underdeveloped shape of Togrutan montrels. She immediately marched over to his tent and walked right in. "Lux, what's going on here?" She said with her eyes giving Lux and Ahsoka both a glare of fury.
"Steela!" Lux called nervously as he backed as far away from Ahsoka as possible.
"Something you wish to share with me Lux?"
They all sat quietly for a brief moment.
"Her? really Lux? How long has this been going on?"
Neither one of them knew how to answer Steela's questions and so they both stared at the ground.
Steela then shook her head and turned to stomp out of the tent. "You know what Lux, we'll deal with this later." And she stomped out of his tent and headed back to her own.
Lux had a look on his face of absolute sadness. He looked as if he might cry.
Ahsoka felt guilty, she never really had any intentions of ruining his relationship with Steela. She walked over to Lux and placed an arm around his shoulder. "I'm, sorry Lux, I'll talk to her." Ahsoka hesitated to say.
Lux looked up at Ahsoka and he could tell that she was sincere, there was no other quality but sincerity in Ahsoka. He smiled at her and put an arm around her. "Ahsoka, I don't blame you for that at all, I caused this mess, and I'll talk my way out of the hole with Steela."
Ahsoka did put on a rather hesitant smile after hearing Lux's words. She wasn't the type to take advantage of someone in this way at all. "I guess I'll head to bed then, good night Lux." She said as she stood up and walked out of the tent.
Lux decided he didn't want to leave things a mess with Steela, so he put on his boots and ran over to her tent. "Steela, I'm; I'm sorry, I need to talk to you."
Steela surprisingly opened the curtain to let him in. "Okay, so talk." She demanded.
"Let me just be honest with you, so yes, Ahsoka and I had feelings for each other, we did kiss on Carlac, it was really the only thing major that happened between us, I mean, we did communicate with each other for quite some time there for a while I guess. She still had some feelings for me Steela and that's what we were talking about just now. I promise."
Steela had her arms crossed and wasn't making eye contact with Lux. "How do I know you two weren't just making out right there?"
"Well, I can't prove that I guess, but she's also a Jedi, she wouldn't just do that." Lux added.
"Lux, this really hurts me. It's mostly the fact that you didn't even tell me and then you call her here to help us. Look Lux, I love you, but I will still need some time to sort this out. I feel I will have to keep my eye on you two." She said as she was beginning to calm down. She then looked at him with much calmer eyes. "This won't be easy to sort out, but you are still my handsome senator."
The conversation went better than Lux expected it to, but he still wasn't completely cool in Steela's mind right now. He knew he had to play it safe and be aware of his behavior around Ahsoka. He walked back to his tent, not happy with how things played out this night, he had hurt two women he loved dearly, the two most important women in his life since his mother's passing. He wasn't sure where he stood with Ahsoka or Steela.
