(Author's Note: Here is where the story catches up to the DH Epilogue. My story will continue with many canon overlaps, but it will not match The Cursed Child. Please continue to read and review. I so appreciate hearing from you! People have asked if I plan to continue past this chapter. The answer is a definite yes. I have most of the story written even if not finely edited yet. There seems to be a natural story arch, but I may consider a sequel eventually. I have just so enjoyed these characters at this phase in their lives. Thanks for going on this journey...carrytheotter)
Chapter 38: Platform 9 3/4
As the Hogwarts Express pulled out of Platform 9 ¾ the next morning, Hermione felt her heart leave her as well. Her eyes welled up as she continued to wave much longer than she could possibly see Rose. She was finally snapped back to herself when she felt Hugo hug her waist as Ron put his arm around her shoulders.
"Thank God you two are here to keep me together," she laughed through her tears.
"I promise it gets easier, Hermione," said Ginny.
"That's what everyone keeps saying," Hermione laughed, a few tears escaping down her cheek.
"Come on, let's all go back to our place for lunch, shall we?" asked Harry.
"That'd be great, mate," nodded Ron. He'd noticed the Daily Prophet photographer on the platform, but didn't want to alert Hermione to her presence. He didn't think she'd seen them yet, but he wasn't sure. So, he quickly turned them towards the exit, and they all headed out of Kings Cross station.
Soon they were in Harry's backyard enjoying the last Friday of the summer. Hugo and Lilly ran off to play while Ginny and Harry headed to the kitchen to make sandwiches.
Hermione walked through the yard smelling the gorgeous roses displaying their last blooms of the season.
"You ok?" Ron asked.
"Yeah. Sad, of course, but she looked so incredibly excited and happy today, didn't she?"
Ron grinned. "She really did."
"I've been thinking a lot about her birthmother today. I was watching Rose this morning, and I was just struck with what her birthmother would think of all this. I mean, I don't know if she was magical or not. But, she was definitely illiterate, moving between a war zone and a refugee camp. Based on the ages of her siblings, I would guess she couldn't have been older than twenty when she had Rose. But, now the daughter she gave life to in the midst of such dire circumstances is strong, loved, educated, healthy and heading off to this prestigious school in England. I hope she somehow knows that, you know? I hope she can feel I did my best by her. I hope she would approve of me letting her go."
Ron stood behind Hermione, engulfing her in his arms. "Hermione, I am absolutely confident her biological parents are beaming with gratitude. You have done such an amazing job raising her. And she will get an incredible education. But, to see her as loved and confident as she is from where you tell me she was when you met her – really, what parent wouldn't be thrilled to see their child was so cared for when they couldn't do it themselves?"
"I hope so. I think so," she said. "Hadn't thought about it in a long time, but somehow I will forever share these key milestones with her, even if I never met her."
"It will be the same with Hugo, too, won't it?" Ron asked quietly.
"Yes. Only we knew Dennis and Fiona."
Ron chuckled. "As if parenthood isn't hard enough, we're trying to live up to the memories and unknown expectations of four other people."
"It's a little overwhelming when you put it that way," she sighed.
"But if the tables were turned, you'd be so grateful, wouldn't you?"
"Yes. I would," she admitted.
"So would I," he said, and then he kissed her cheek.
They remained in a quiet embrace for a few moments until Hermione said, "I told Rose I would be staying with you after she left. She was very happy about that, actually. Said it made it easier on her to have me not be in the house alone."
"Told you she's brilliant and perceptive," he grinned.
"I want to talk to Hugo first, though. And, I am not going to stay tonight. I need to – I don't know – I know it seems melodramatic. But, I need to go ahead and face the empty house so I can move past it. Is that crazy?"
Ron eyed her. "Not crazy, but surprising maybe."
"Really?"
"Why make yourself be sad if you don't have to be?"
"It's not about making myself sad as much as it is about facing the fact that I am already sad. Pretending it's not happening doesn't make it not real. Sometimes the only way past something is through it."
Ron held her tighter. After a few moments of comfortable silence he finally said, "You're right, of course. But you have to realize I am the daft bloke who never got around to facing my own grief for almost twenty years until you helped me through it."
At that she hugged him tighter, but said nothing.
"Are you sure you want to be alone, though?"
"Tonight, yes. I'm sure. But thanks for checking. I'm not locking myself away to sob or anything. But, I know for me I need to be alone in my quiet home tonight. Bouncing from putting her on the train to suddenly moving into your house, it would just mess with my head. And I want to talk to Hugo and everything first."
"OK. You want me to say anything to him?"
"No, I'll do it. I just want to talk to him and see for myself that he's ok with it."
"Whatever you want, Love. But I am really thrilled you're planning to come. I know it would be better at your home, but it won't be forever."
"I'm glad I'm coming too," she said as she turned and kissed him.
Ron looked at the rose blooms in the yard and leaned to smell one of the flowers. "I don't think you ever told me about how you chose Rose's name. Actually, I don't even think I know her middle name. What is it?"
"Hila," Hermione said with a smile. "Hila, which means hope in Pashto, was the name she was given by her birth parents. I tried to decide if I should keep that as her first name or not, but I eventually realized I wanted to give her a new first name and keep Hila as her middle name. So, Rose Hila Granger it was."
"It's beautiful," Ron said wistfully. "How did you pick Rose?"
"Several things actually. Both of my grandmothers were named Rose. And it is also my mum's middle name. But, it just seemed so fitting for her. She was this gorgeous, bright spirit in the middle of this harsh place – like a rose among thorns in many ways. But, I also thought about how she just rose up from this horrible situation and yet was still able to live and love and thrive. She simply rose from the ashes of so much – her parents' death, the war in her homeland, the betrayal of her relatives – she didn't let it crush her. So – Rose Hila it was."
"Rose Hila Granger. So perfect," mused Ron. "Hey – I don't think I know your middle name."
"Jean," she said with a chuckle. On my mum's side they have always used the mum's first name as the middle name for the daughter."
"But you didn't want Rose Hermione?"
"Well, no – I wanted to keep Hila in her name as it was the one thing her birth parents gave her that she could take with her. But since they both start with an H, it rather keeps the spirit of the tradition too. While we are on the subject, what's your middle name?"
"Ronald Bilius Weasley, at your service," Ron said as he bowed slightly.
"Bilius?" she questioned. "Is that a common wizarding name?"
"No – but Bilius was my uncle. A lovely uncle, actually. He is the one who taught me to play wizard chess."
"Hmm. Isn't it interesting how names can weave their own form of connected magic?"
"Magic?"
"Well, maybe since you were named to honor Bilius, he felt closer to you as an infant and that's why he invested the time to teach you chess. And maybe Rose's birth parents' hopes for their daughter are somehow coming true today as she heads off to an amazing school to learn things they never could. I don't know – it just seems to connect generations of family across time, biological or not."
"Maybe. The more I've learned about magic over the years, the more I realize there is so much I will never understand," Ron chuckled.
"Well, magic or not, I do like thinking of those connected threads across families. I love that Hugo's middle name is Collin. And I love that my daughter is named for my grandmothers, even though Rose and Hugo were never able to meet the people they were named after."
After they had enjoyed lunch outside with everyone, Hermione and Ginny decided to run to the local shops for some last minute back-to-muggle-school shopping with Hugo and Lily, leaving Ron and Harry at the house.
"So, do you think Hermione is going to be ok by herself? Will she be too upset, you think?" Harry asked.
"Well, actually she's planning on coming to stay with Hugo and I. Um, not tonight – said she has to face the empty house or something. But yeah, the plan is for her to not stay alone at her place much."
"That's brilliant, Ron! Congratulations!"
"Well, she told Rose, but she said she wants to talk to Hugo first too. Can't imagine what Mum will say. But I don't right care too much actually."
"She'll be fine. Probably pleased actually. It's not like you're 19 and trying to live together."
"Yeah, like some people I know tried," scoffed Ron as he smacked Harry in the arm.
"Right. So Gin and I paved the way to make it easier for other Weasleys to follow. You're welcome by the way."
Ron just shook his head and laughed as he flicked his wand to put the last of the clean dishes away.
"Right," Harry continued. "So in addition to having the woman of your dreams move in with you, what else do you have going on?"
Ron scrunched his face up in thought. "Well, it's strange. I've realized that when Hugo goes back to school on Monday I'll have absolutely nothing to do all day every day until the afternoon. I don't think that I've ever not had anything I had to do. Blimey. I've taken care of the kids all summer, so I guess I never really thought about what would happen once fall term started back up. Now what the fuck am I going to do?"
"Sounds like a brilliant problem."
"Huh. But still a problem."
"Well, it isn't Monday yet. I would suggest you enjoy this weekend and help Hermione out these next few days. Then once you drop Hugo Monday, you can take some time to start thinking about what it is you really want to do in this next chapter of your life."
"Sounds reasonable. But any suggestions how to actually do that?"
"Well, no. But we have started tougher missions with less of a plan before that ended up ok."
"So basically you think I need to rely on, what'd McGonagall call it? Sheer dumb luck?'
"Ron! Seriously. You are working yourself into a tizzy for no reason. You are healthy and happy. You suddenly have two amazing and healthy kids who love you. You are in love with a gorgeous and smart witch who loves you and wants to move in with you and eventually marry you. And you don't have to work 60 hours a week anymore. There have been worse situations to face. You are being ridiculous. We are going to go for a fly now and see if the fresh air can't knock some sense back in your head."
When Ginny and Hermione had finished up the shopping, the decided to go by a local café that was next to a local park. The two ladies sat at an outside table where they could watch Hugo and Lilly play.
"You seem a bit better than you did this morning," Ginny observed.
"I am. I think seeing her so happy makes it a lot easier. It just feels like the end of an era. It had been just the two of us for so long. And that is over now…and I'm excited for this next chapter, but it is still rather shocking to launch her into the world and think about what I'm going to do with myself now that I'm not just known as Rose's mum."
"You know, I have never tried to understand the universe, as there seems to be a lot of fucked up stuff that happens in my opinion. But, somehow, it seems you are somehow destined to be this amazing mum to two children who happened to be born to other women. And that is no easy task. I know - I helped raise Teddy. But, raising one from infancy is frankly a lot easier than stepping in when they have already grown into their own personalities. Sure you get to miss the sleep deprivation stage, but you also don't get to have any input on setting habits or expectations, and you don't have all of those shared experiences that help you understand how to help them. My parents more or less started raising Harry around age 12, and it was really hard on all three of them. Now, he'd had a fucked up idea of what family was from horrid muggle relatives, but it was still tough. With Hugo you have a different situation altogether. You've known him since he was born, as has Ron. But now you both have a different role to fill. But that doesn't mean it will be easy."
"Exactly. How do I shift from friend to parent without trying to replace Fiona? And how do I do any of that and not overstep Ron's place as the actual godparent. It is so hard to figure out what the right step is."
"First off, you can't overstep Ron. It's not like you two have his and hers kids here. And he is learning parenting from you anyway. Second, I don't know how it was for you with Rose since you didn't know her birthmother, but for me, I knew Teddy's birthmother very well. I was actually there when he was born and helped with the delivery. So I always seemed to have Tonks – that was his mum – in my head. I was always trying to figure out if Tonks would be ok with this or if she would prefer that. And then I finally realized that wasn't doing Teddy, Tonks or me any favors. Tonks was gone. I couldn't be Tonks for Teddy. What Tonks and Teddy both needed me to do, though, was be a good mum to Teddy. And the only way I could do that was to be myself. Because trust me, when I try to be anything I'm not – especially little miss happy mummy from a fairy tale - I am a complete arse. So, I chucked that approach altogether."
"That's brilliant, Ginny. That's exactly what I have been struggling with, and I didn't even realize it. I've certainly thought of Rose's birthmother many times, but she's not in my head like Fiona is. And I hadn't realized that was the problem until you just put the issue into words for me. I am not nearly as fun or relaxed or tough or witty as Fiona was. I didn't really even know her that well. Ron was obviously close with her, but I had always been so close with Dennis, and really only knew her as his wife. And I really don't want Hugo to either forget her or feel I'm trying to replace her. So – how do I fill her role without her in my head while still keeping her memory alive for Hugo?"
Ginny took a sip of her tea and considered the question for a moment. Eventually she sighed, "I don't have a perfect answer. But for Teddy, we would show him a lot of pictures or talk about how funny Tonks was or what she might have done in a given situation. She was a total klutz – truly the worst of anyone I have ever known, and when Teddy would fall down or mess something up as a kid we would talk about how Tonks handled that kind of thing. We taught him some of these little phrases that his parents had said. It was neat, actually – it got to the point that when Teddy would trip he would say 'wotcher' just like his mum had always done. And Harry would talk with him a lot about how his Dad would have approached learning a subject or reading things, as Lupin – that was his dad – was so smart and a fabulous teacher. But eventually Teddy asked if he could call us Mum and Dad. I was fine with it, but Harry really struggled. But, eventually he understood that he wasn't replacing Lupin for Teddy – but instead filling a role Teddy needed in his present life."
"Wow. It's hard to picture Hugo calling me mum. Ron and I have actually talked about names and such, as I suspect Rose will want to call him dad rather soon. And, I worried what it would be like for Rose and Hugo to refer to him in different ways. It never even occurred to me that Hugo may want to call him dad too."
"Well, he might not. Obviously that is something that Hugo would have to initiate. But, don't be shocked if it comes up."
"Huh. I am so glad we've talked about this, Ginny. Really – thank you."
"Of course, Hermione. Look, I know we haven't gotten to spend much time one on one. But, frankly I have never seen Ron as happy as he has been since you showed up in his life. And, I could not be happier for him. And I can't imagine adapting to as much change as you have had this past year. So, if there is anything – and I really mean anything- I can do to help you, I really hope you'll let me know."
Hermione realized she was tearing up at Ginny's words. "Thank you, Ginny. Really. It has been rather a ridiculous year. But aside from having to watch Hugo grieve his family, and thinking I may lose Ron in that smuggling disaster, watching Rose get on that train this morning was the hardest part. Ron has been so fabulous, and I feel so lucky that we have found each other. But he is new to parenthood, so watching Rose leave the nest is a completely different experience for him than it is for me. And while he has been incredible at helping me learn my way in the magical world, I really do think I could use some female friends too."
"Well, Merlin knows I would be an utter mess if Ron were the only one there to explain the world to me," joked Ginny. "But in all seriousness, you seem to have managed to bring something out in my brother that I never thought possible. He has suddenly transformed into this thoughtful, sensitive soul. I had no idea that was even possible! But I can't imagine he can keep that up all of the time. So – yes – getting together with some witches is a must. I get together with my sisters in law pretty regularly. And, while I don't want to force you into that lot any quicker than you are comfortable with, we'd all love to have you join us sometime. Would you want to come to our next lunch gathering?"
"Definitely. That would be really fantastic. I have had several good conversations with Fleur, but I haven't spent much time at all chatting with everyone else."
"Usually the second and fourth Tuesdays of each month we meet up at lunch. We usually meet at the Leaky Cauldron and Hannah gives us the private room in the back so we can chat about our not so anonymous husbands without being overheard."
"That sounds perfect. I definitely don't want to end up back in the Daily Prophet any sooner than I have to."
"True - but you have to admit – you both looked pretty damn happy in those pictures. It's shite that they got published, but I remember the first time I had a picture of Harry and I published that I really hadn't realized had been taken, and it allowed me to really see how he looked at me. Really helped me understand what I meant to him, you know?"
"I do," admitted Hermione with a blush. "But I still would have rather had a copy mailed to me and not put out in the paper for everyone to see. I'm so relieved the kids didn't find out about us that way."
"No kidding. Just an added layer of annoyance to our lives. It's rather like stinging nettle I think. Stings like hell when you stumble into it, but most of the time it's just part of the background and doesn't bother you at all."
Hermione laughed and shook her head at her new friend. "You are most assuredly one of a kind, Ginny."
Ginny laughed. "So, not to turn into my mum or anything, but when the hell are you two going to finally get married?"
Hermione laughed again. "Well, with as much as our parents and children and apparently siblings all want us to get married, I suppose it won't be too long."
"The kids have said that too?"
"Oh yes, they both mentioned it separately actually, though Ron and I both suspect they could be ganging up on us a bit."
"So – what did you say?"
"The truth – that we plan to get married, but we want to take our time. It has really been an insane year, and I don't want us to rush into marriage and screw it up because we didn't take the time to really get to know each other first."
"I guess that's good. Hard to imagine for me, honestly. I knew I wanted to marry Harry since I was ten. And then after the war we both knew we didn't want to put anything off."
"Right, but as much as you two grew up together and figured out things as a couple, Ron and I both lived totally independent, separate lives – in separate worlds, honestly. We just need to figure out how to merge those. And we'd agreed we were going to really not even think about it until Rose left for school so I could focus on her."
"But now she's left for school."
"Right," said Hermione sadly. "The current plan is for me to live, at least part of the time, with Ron and Hugo."
"Makes sense. But why only part of the time?"
"I don't know. I am trying to figure all of that out as we go. But I know I am not ready to sell my house. And Hugo wants to live in his house. And since I haven't lived with anyone other than Rose in more than a decade, and never lived with any male other than my dad, I honestly think I'll need a little space for myself."
"Brilliant plan, Hermione. Between living with my 6 older brothers, my husband and my two sons, I think you're a ruddy genius. I finally had to come up with a charm to force the males in my house to put the seat down in the loo. And let's face it, men are just slobs. Even the ones we love. Maybe I'll have to sneak out and have some time to myself at your house when you're at Ron and Hugo's!"
Hermione was giggling at Ginny's pronouncement.
"Well, Ron seemed rather confused when I told him I wanted to stay by myself at my house tonight. I think he has an image of me locking myself away and crying over Rose's baby clothes or something. And I'm not saying I won't reminisce a little tonight, but it isn't nearly that melodramatic."
"Of course not. But my goodness, you need a chance to get your sea legs having watched your daughter leave the nest this morning before you jump head first into the next phase, don't you?"
"Precisely what I said. Maybe it's a female thing."
"Or just a smart people thing," scoffed Ginny.
Hermione laughed again, "Well, and I still want to talk to Hugo and make sure he is really ok with it. I mean I know he keeps talking about how we should get married, but the theoretical idea of it, and my moving in down the hall are quite different. And he's already had a lot of shockwaves to his family environment this year, I just don't want to be the one thing that sends him over the edge."
"Well, I think it sounds like you have your head on straight and have a brilliant plan."
"Thanks, Ginny."
When Hermione, Ginny, Hugo and Lilly returned to the Potters' house, they found that Harry and Ron had gone out for a fly. Hermione decided to take the opportunity to have some one on one time with Hugo, so she and Hugo said their farewells to Ginny and Lilly and floo'd back to Hugo's house.
"Hermione?" Hugo asked once they had stepped through the fireplace.
"Yes, Love?"
"I'll go with you to your house if you don't want to go by yourself for the first time without Rose."
His serious and somber tone touched Hermione's heart, and she instinctively knelt to hug him. "Oh, Hugo. You are such an incredibly dear soul, and I am so lucky to have you in my life."
"Do you want to go by your house? When I am missing Mummy and Daddy I like to go into their room because it still smells like them. I know Rose is just at Hogwarts, so it isn't really the same, but we are still going to miss her."
"We will, won't we? You know, I would like you to come with me back to my house for a few minutes."
They stepped through the fireplace and soon emerged in her living room. Hugo hugged Hermione, and Hermione realized he needed this as much or more than she did. She took his hand and together they walked up to Rose's room. There on the bed, Hugo saw several stuffed animals that Rose had left behind. He walked over and sat on her bed gently, reaching out to touch the stuffed unicorn on the bed.
"You know what I think?" said Hermione softly. "I think you should take this unicorn back to your house so that when you are missing Rose, you can hug it and think of her."
Hugo smiled. "I like that idea, Hermione. Do you remember when Rose and me made those placemats and she covered hers in unicorns before she even knew they were real? It was like she always knew about magic even if she wasn't aware of it in her awake mind."
"Exactly."
Hermione sat down on the bed beside Hugo and stroked some of the other stuffed animals on the bed.
"Hermione, are you going to be ok here all by yourself? I don't want you to be sad. If I had to live at my house all by myself I would be really lonely and sad."
"Well, it's funny you say that. I wanted to talk to you about something. What would you think if I came and lived some of the time with you and Ron?"
Hugo grinned. "I think that would be bloody brilliant!"
"Oh my, you sound just like Ron," chuckled Hermione.
"Well, it is brilliant. It makes a lot of sense for you to come and stay with us. Seems silly for our family to be spread all out in so many places."
"I like that we are all a family," sighed Hermione.
"Me too. And I think it would make Mummy and Daddy so happy too. But they'll be even happier when you two finally get married," quipped Hugo.
"You think?"
"Definitely, Hermione."
"I want to come live with you two, but I still want to keep my home here as well. But, can I bring some things over to make it feel a bit more like my home too? I know you've kept a lot of things the same, like your parents' bedroom and such. But, if I brought some things for the room I'll share with Ron, or maybe some different things in the downstairs, would that be ok with you? I really don't want to do anything that would make you feel uncomfortable, Hugo."
Hugo thought about this for a moment and shook his head in agreement. "I don't want to change their bedroom, and I kind of like their office as it is too. But, everything else we can try to make for all of us."
Hermione hugged the little boy tightly. "I love you so much, Hugo. I am so lucky to have you in my family."
He hugged her back and smiled. "Me too."
After a minute he said, "Is it too soon to write to Rose?"
"Of course not," laughed Hermione. "Why don't we both send her a note – and you can maybe draw her a picture of you with the unicorn? Then we'll send it off tonight and she can get it on her first morning at Hogwarts. How does that sound?"
Hugo was still working on his picture for Rose when Ron came home an hour later. He added his own letter to Rose, and they sent Pig off to deliver their love to the missing family spending her first night in the Scottish Highlands.
