"Reiner, no."

"But princess, why not?" Reiner whined.

I shook my head while facing away from him, "Because we'll get caught."

"Alex, we're the only ones here. Besides, it's just kissing," he said innocently before bending down to kiss the sweet spot on my neck. I gasped softly, and I felt him smile against my skin.

"I won't let you get in trouble, princess. I just want a few kisses from my beautiful girlfriend."

"Well," I sighed, turning to look him in the eye, "I guess when you put it like that…"

Every week two cadets worked together to clean the offices and barracks of Commander Shadis and the other instructors. Usually I did this job with Hannah, but Reiner had offered to do it for her. Hannah hadn't really questioned it, and Reiner's cleaning partner had been Franz, who Hannah was more than happy to spend more time with. The only thing we had left to clean was Shadis' personal quarters, which had a large, comfy bed, a large desk, and a decent sized personal restroom complete with a shower.

I leaned in gladly when Reiner kissed me, and I felt my head swim when his kisses became more urgent. I felt Reiner's hands grab my thighs as he leaned down further, and then picked me up as if I weighed nothing. I grabbed his hips with my legs for extra support, but Reiner sat me back down on Shadis' desk soon after he picked me up.

I felt myself getting a little excited. Kissing in the Commander's private room on his desk was probably the most rebellious thing I had ever done. I wasn't much of a rule breaker, but it seemed that every time I did, Reiner was involved somehow.

As he moved down to kiss more of my neck, Reiner's hands started to tease the edges of my shirt. He reached underneath and ran his fingers along the skin on my hips and stomach. As always when he did this, I pulled back. I pushed myself off the desk and walked back to the side of the room with the cleaning supplies.

Reiner never seemed exasperated with me when I did this, though. He simply stroked my hair and said, "Sorry, princess. We don't have to go any further if you don't want to."

I nodded and motioned to the cleaning supplies, "Let's hurry up and finish our job so we can relax, yeah?"

My reluctance had nothing to do with Reiner, or not wanting him. My discomfort came from the fact that I didn't really know what going further meant. Unlike many of my peers, I didn't know much of anything about pleasure, and that made me nervous. I didn't know what to expect or what to do, and I hated being in situations like that. I was also afraid of embarrassing myself in front of Reiner.

After we finished and left the building, Reiner turned to me and asked, "Are you excited?"

"Huh? Excited for what?"

"For Trost? We'll be going in a few days. They say we'll have plenty of downtime to relax and explore the city while we're there."

"Oh! It's exciting, I suppose. It's definitely been a while since I've been in a city."

"That's right, I forget you grew up in one of the walled cities. Trost must not be that exciting for someone like you," he teased.

"It's not my fault I'm not a country bumpkin like you," I said while sticking my tongue.

Reiner laughed at me and said, "Hey, where are you going?"

"I was going to go read before dinner. Are you coming?"

He shrugged, "Why not?"

When we got into the library, I was surprised to see Armin and Eren already there, reading books at a desk in the middle of the room.

"Done with cleaning?" asked Armin.

"Yep, finally," Reiner responded while pulling out a chair to sink into.

Eren glanced up from his book, "Reiner, this isn't your day to clean, is it?"

"Nah."

"Why'd you clean on a day you didn't have to?" Eren asked, obviously confused.

I saw Armin nudge him and give him a look.

"What?"

"I'll explain it to you later," whispered Armin, although I heard from where I stood at the bookshelves behind them, and I was sure Reiner heard him, too.

I had read most of the books about fighting strategies, so I grabbed one of the few books dedicated towards using 3DMG gear. Reiner got up and started browsing the shelves, probably to avoid the awkward atmosphere around Armin and Eren. It had been almost two months since Reiner and I had gotten together, and our plan to keep it low key had failed. I was pretty sure that oblivious Eren was the only one who still didn't know.

I sat down at the table across from Eren and Armin and said, "What are you two reading?"

Armin waved the cover of his book, and I was surprised to see that he wasn't reading a fiction book, but rather one on politics. Eren was reading one of the war strategy books I had already read.

"You were right, Alex, reading these books actually has helped me improve," stated Eren.

"Yeah," I responded sarcastically, "It's like reading a book about a subject will give you more knowledge on that subject, or something. It's amazing how that works."

"We'll need to read a lot of books, Eren," said Reiner as he sat down again with a book of his own in his hands, "to compete with these two in the classroom."

"My scores aren't that high," I objected. "Armin's the one that blows everyone out of the water."

"Don't be modest," Armin blushed. "It's not that great."

I smiled and looked back down at my book. I knew Armin was the true modest one, though. He never seemed to be able to admit to how smart and talented he really was.

After a while, the dinner bell rang, and we went to the mess hall. I split up with boys from there and sat down at the table where Sasha and the rest of the girls where.

"Alex!" Sasha yelled in my ear, making me jump. "I haven't seen you all day. Where have you been?"

"With Reiner," said Mina with a smirk.

I rolled my eyes, "I had cleaning duty today, so I was stuck doing chores all day."

"Aww," said Sasha. "I hate cleaning duty."

I nodded and began eating.

"Don't feel too bad for her," Ymir smiled. "I heard Reiner switched days with Hannah. I bet her afternoon wasn't really that boring."

I ignored the laughter and teasing of the girls around me, but I could feel my face turning red.

"Don't be so embarrassed," chuckled Mina. "I had interesting afternoon, too, you know."

"Thomas?" asked Annie.

"Yes!" she gushed. "It was so romantic! We went out to that lake again."

"Well?" prodded Christa when she didn't continue. "What did you two do out there?"

"That's personal," Mina teased with a mischievous glint in her eye.

"Why did you bring it up if you weren't going to tell us details?" grumbled Annie.

I giggled. It never failed to make me happy when I saw Annie participating in the "girl talk" that she had admonished me for before.

Mina shook her head and said, "I won't give you too many details, but I will say that I am no longer apart of the V-squad." She finished smugly and this inspired a lot of excitement from around the table.

"Wait, really?" cried Sasha. "Tell us everything!"

"Was it good?" asked Ymir.

Christa looked more shocked than anyone else at the table, "You used protection, didn't you?"

I pieced together what Mina had meant, and looked at her in admiration. Maybe she could answer my questions, I thought to myself.

"It was amazing!" she exclaimed, and then quieted her voice when she realized we were catching the attention of the other tables. "They always say the first time is the worst, you know? But I thought it was good! Maybe that means the next times will be even better."

"You used protection, didn't you?" repeated Christa with a more urgent tone in her voice.

"Yes, I used protection, I'm not stupid," she answered.

"How big was he?" asked Sasha, and that question I didn't follow.

Mina held her hands apart what appeared to be around 12 centimeters, "About that big. That's not bad is it?"

Annie shook her head, "I think that's about average."

Mina turned to me, "How big is Reiner's, Alex? Is he bigger or smaller?"

I felt heat rush to my face as I stammered, "I, uh, I don't… Um…"

"Oh," said Mina, "Really? But haven't you been together for months?"

"Less than two," I corrected.

"Wait, what?" asked Sasha. "I thought you two were closing in on a year together?"

"No? Who said that?" I asked.

"Everyone has thought you two have been dating since at least before the winter training trip," explained Annie.

"Really?" I exclaimed, and they all nodded. So not only did our attempts to be low key fail, they were failed before we even started.

"There's nothing wrong with keeping it slow, anyway," assured Mina, patting my hand. "As long as you're comfortable."

I thought about telling them then about my ignorance, but decided to wait until that night in the barracks where there wouldn't be so many people listening in.

After dinner, I spoke for a few minutes with Bertholdt and Reiner before telling them goodnight and that I was going to bed early.

When I got in the barracks, I saw it was half empty, but Mina, Christa, Ymir, and Mikasa were already inside. I got dressed for bed quickly and called them over to mine and Mikasa's bed.

"There's something I want to ask you all about," I announced, "but you have to promise not to make fun of me."

"I don't make promises like that," answered Ymir, but after getting hit in the ribs by Christa, she said, "I promise."

Mikasa and Mina nodded, and I took a breath, "Okay. The truth is, I haven't done anything more with Reiner than kiss him. Not because I don't want to do more, I just don't really know what more is, and I don't want to embarrass myself."

"Okay," Mina nodded. "What exactly do you not know?"

"Please tell me you know about sex," demanded Ymir, and I nodded.

"I know about sex… sort of? When I first started bleeding in the refugee camps, one of the older ladies explained to Mikasa and I what sex is and why we bleed, but that's honestly all I know."

"Oh," said Mina, nodding solemnly. "That's okay. We'll help you. Do you need to know anything Mikasa?"

"Well," said Mikasa, who looked very uncomfortable with the conversation, "I don't know anything more than Alex, so I guess?"

"Okay, uh…" Mina looked at Ymir and Christa, who both looked sort of lost, too.

Just then Sasha walked inside, and Mina yelled across the room, "Sasha! Come here!"

"What's up?" she yawned, and Mina quickly explained the situation to her.

"I don't know where to start," explained Mina.

Sasha looked at me with wide eyes and I hid my face in my hands.

"No, no, no, don't be embarrassed!" Sasha said grabbing my hands. "It's okay! So, you said that you haven't done anything more than kiss him?"

"That's right," I nodded.

"So, what comes after that is called foreplay," explained Sasha. "To me, it's the best part."

"Have you and Connie…?" I wondered aloud.

"Yeah," her face turned slightly pink. "Wait, let me back up, the best advice I could give you is to talk to Reiner about this."

"I don't want him to laugh at me- "

"Do you see us laughing at you?" asked Sasha, and I shook my head.

"I didn't know much about all this either, not long ago. But Connie and I talked about it, and he didn't know much either, just what other guys had told him. So, we figured it out together, and I think that made it better. Reiner's crazy for you, he won't get mad or make fun of you."

I swallowed and nodded again, "Okay, but still, it'd make me feel better if you could tell me a little bit. Just so I'm not completely clueless."

Mina grabbed my hand, "Ask us anything you want, and we'll answer."

The other girls nodded, and I started, "What is foreplay?"

"Foreplay is what comes before sex," answered Sasha.

"Usually, you get undressed during foreplay, but really you can do whatever you want," added Mina.

As Mina, Sasha, and Ymir explained the different things you can do during foreplay, my head spun. It was a lot to take in.

"You don't know much about your own body, do you?" asked Ymir.

"No," I admitted.

"It's important to touch yourself and get to know yourself first. How is he supposed to know what you like, if you don't?"

I looked at Mikasa, who nodded, "That makes sense, but…" from the look on her face I knew that she was wondering the same thing as me.

"Masturbation," clarified Mina, "is a completely normal and healthy practice. Since we all sleep here in one room, you should probably try it in the shower."

"Connie says some of the boys do it at night under the covers, and it's really obvious," Sasha added. "Can you imagine how gross that would be if girls did that?"

"Gross?" I inquired. "I thought Mina just said it was normal and healthy?"

"It is," assured Christa. "But it's… well, it's personal."

"When you're alone in the shower, just try touching your lady parts and figure out for yourself what works," explained Ymir. "As you probably already know, I can't help you much about knowing about a man's body, but I can answer questions about a woman's body."

"Right," I said. "But I don't know much of anything about a man's body, either. What were you all talking about at dinner, about how big Reiner and Thomas were?"

"Oh, sweetie, we meant their dicks," said Mina. "I'm sorry, Alex, if I had known I wouldn't have put you on the spot before."

Mina went on to explain what a man's genitals were like and how each were different. She and Sasha then went on to go more in detail about what all you could do with a man's genitalia during foreplay.

"Ew," I winced. "You put it in your mouth?"

"It's not that bad," assured Mina. "And they love when you do that."

"Again, you should talk to Reiner to see what he thinks before you go any further," repeated Sasha.

"Has Reiner ever tried to do anything more," asked Mikasa, who had been listening quietly for most of the conversation.

"Not really," I responded. "Not anything like all that. Sometimes when we're making out, he touches my hips and stomach under my shirt, but I usually get nervous and stop after that."

"He doesn't pressure you to keep going?" asked Mina.

"No. Did Thomas pressure you?"

"No, not him. But I've had guys did that before. It's a good thing that he respects your limits. It means he respects you."

"Okay," I sighed. "Thank you all so much. You're the best. I'm just nervous about it."

"It's okay to be nervous," smiled Christa while giving me a hug.

"If you ever need anything else, come talk to us," said Mina.

"And remember to talk to Reiner," Sasha put in.

"Okay, I will."

Not long after that, the light's out bell rang and all the girls made their way to their respective beds. I noticed that Annie still hadn't returned to her bed, but when I questioned Mina, she said that Annie did that sometimes.

Someone turned off the main light and I crawled under the covers.

"Hey… Alex?" I heard a soft whisper from beside me.

"Yeah?" I rolled over to face Mikasa, who was staring at me. I moved a little closer so that we could whisper without bothering anyone else.

"Are you serious, about wanting to have sex and all with Reiner?" she whispered.

"I mean, I guess? Maybe not like tomorrow, but eventually. Why?"

"I just…. I don't know. Honestly, I haven't thought about stuff like that before."

"That's okay. No one says you have to," I reached out and stroked her hair. Something was bothering her, I just wasn't sure what.

"Do you remember how I came to live with Eren and his parents?" she asked, I thought that was an odd question, but I nodded a yes.

"Those men that killed my parents, that's what they were planning to do with me."

I stayed quiet for a second, before asking, "What?"

"Sex. They were planning to sell me for sex. Because I'm Asian, and I'm probably the last Asian. Before Eren found me…." She trailed off, but I figured out what she meant.

"Oh my god," I pulled her into my arms and held her there.

"It was a long time ago, Alex. Those men didn't rape me, they just 'examined' me. I didn't understand any of it at the time, though. But all that talk scared me a little, and I just wanted to tell someone."

"Still, that's terrible. I'm so sorry," I whispered into her hair.

We were silent for a while, and I realized she had fallen asleep after a while. I sighed and followed her into sleep.

A/N: I hope everyone felt the awkward I tried so hard to convey in this chapter. Cause, you know, what are finals? What are responsibilities? Who knows?