Memily's favorite place within the confines of the Jedi Temple grounds was the library. Managed by Master Tionne Solusar, the collection had started as a small shelf kept in Tionne's room at the Jedi Praxeum on Yavin IV, but had grown vastly since then and now adorned an entire room of shelves and cases of data chips. Memily relished rare moments of quiet when she could sneak away to this place and relax her mind. She absolutely enjoyed gazing through the collection and finding something completely new.
This time, she happened to stumble upon a medical journal, a crash course guide to the basics of Jedi healing. She'd trailed her finger across the dusty spines of ancient texts, then come to a sudden stop, not entirely conscious of what she'd found that had caught her eye. She dusted off the cover and found a cozy spot in the back of the library to read.
There was an index of thousands of various sentient beings and a rough summary of their unique anatomy. There were notes published by long deceased Jedi healers and dozens of essays on the relationship between the body and the Force. Memily started from the very beginning, taking the extra time to read through each and every page.
She lost track of time at some point, didn't notice that the library's lights had dimmed to signal that it would be closing soon, and she nearly fell out of her chair when a bell rang for curfew. She sputtered a few colorful curses she'd picked up from her father and hurried to gain her footing, running to return to her sister's quarters for the night.
Perhaps it was a Solo trait, Memily thought when she made it to Jaina's quarters and found that her sister hadn't yet returned either. She breathed a sigh of relief and padded off to the guest bed, snatching a miniature glowrod on the way. Late into the night, a while after she heard her sister enter the quarters and bury herself in bed, Memily still had the book cracked open, and she fell asleep with it in her arms.
"Winter says 'hi'," Leia told Memily. Her younger daughter was curled up against her on the couch, her head resting in her lap. She and Han had just gotten back from New Alderaan and decided to join their children on Coruscant for the time being.
"We were trying to remember," Leia continued, "when the last time she'd seen you was. I showed her a holo and she didn't think she recognized you."
Memily shrugged. She hadn't grown close to Winter like Jaina had. Winter had practically raised Leia's three older children as much as it pained her to think about it. Briefly during their time on New Alderaan, Winter had mentioned how odd it felt to her that she hardly knew Memily when she had known her older siblings so well. In a selfish way, that pleased Leia. Her daughter, her child. She'd been lucky enough to keep this one close. She'd managed to spare her and her younger brother from so many of the cruelties the twins and Anakin had grown up facing. Memily was still hers, still her innocent, precious bean.
Leia smiled contentedly as she stroked Memily's light hair and watched her read. She was so focused on whatever text she was reading, so absorbed in her book. She finally broke out of it when Leia reached for the textbook clutched between her hands. She thumbed the crisp pages. "What are you reading? You haven't put that down since we got home."
She merely shrugged again, flipping her page. "Just something I found in the library."
"And what is it?" Leia tilted the cover so she could see. "A medical journal?"
The young girl nodded.
"Do you have to read it for a class?"
That single question was what drew Memily out of herself and she sat up to look at Leia. She shrank back as if afraid of her mother's reaction. "No," she responded meekly.
"Okay." Leia rushed to backpedal, trying her best to reassure her. "I was just curious what- made you want to read it. I don't have a problem with it."
Hesitantly, Memily settled back into her lap. "I just saw it at the library and I thought it looked interesting."
"Okay. That's fine."
The thought had been burning in her chest for months, Leia realized before the day was over. Little hints, strayed thoughts that this didn't fit together. Her concern eating at her, Leia settled into bed and waited for Han to join her. He was finishing in the refresher, and from the angle set between the 'fresher mirror and their bed, Leia could see him, watch as he washed up. Han caught her gaze in the mirror. "Someone's anxious," he noted sourly, drying his hands. He turned out of the refresher and came to lie with her. "What are you thinking about?"
"I'm worried about Memily."
Han seemed startled by the concern. "What are you worried about? She seems fine to me." He frowned. "You're worried about the book-?"
"I don't care about what she's reading, Han. It just made me think. She's seemed so- despondent lately. And I think it has to do with being assigned to her master soon."
"You think she isn't excited?"
"Honestly, Han, I don't know how she feels about it. But I'm starting to wonder if she doesn't want to train at all."
Han shrugged. "She hasn't said much about it."
"Clue number one," Leia surmised. "I'll be glad for her if she knows that she doesn't want to follow the same path as Jaina and …" Naturally, she trailed off, and her gaze sought out her husband's for comfort.
He took hold of her shoulders, held her up, and returned her knowing look. He gave a small nod. "Yeah, me too, Princess. I'd be thrilled if she'd rather grow up to be a low-income barista on Tatooine."
"Oh, Han, you do not!"
Han laughed. "But it would be nice if one of our kids didn't feel the urge to die for the rest of the galaxy."
Leia allowed herself a fragile smile. She nuzzled into Han's embrace, her eyes flicking from behind her eyelashes to look at him. "They got that from us, you know."
Han moved to hold her face in his hands and rested his forehead against hers. "I know."
Leia thought of Anakin, of his last days spent with the Jedi Order investigating the treacherous voxyn, and of his insistence that sending him was the only way to stop them. She reflected on Jacen's last days and his sudden fall from grace- and she thought about his final moments, when she could suddenly feel her son again, an outpouring of love for his child as he gave up his life in an attempt to save her. "We taught our kids to be selfless, to value life, and to fight for justice and freedom. Perhaps, we taught them too well."
"Yeah, I 'spose we did do that."
"We'll talk to her," Leia decided. "First thing tomorrow morning."
"She hasn't put that book down since she found it." Jaina gestured to her younger sister with a nod, sharing a smile with her mother. "I don't know what made her pick it up, but if I hadn't started rethinking this before, I knew then."
Leia stood across the room at the end of the hallway with her eldest child. From their hidden viewpoint, they watched Memily as she simply sat there, still reading through her textbook. Amazed, Leia noted that, six days into her reading, she was nearly finished.
Leia switched her gaze from one daughter to the other so she could gauge Jaina's expression. From the certain look in her eyes, Leia knew what she meant; Jaina had reached the same conclusion as she and Han finally had. Yet, it didn't make her feel any better, only worse. Her stomach curdled with guilt. "What do you think this means?"
She chuckled. "For starters, she doesn't need me as a master. If she is to train, I might be one of the worst choices for her."
"You make it sound like you've been thinking about this."
"I've given it some thought," Jaina admitted. She led her mother down the hall as she reached into the pockets of her robe for her commlink. "Memily doesn't need to be taught by a warrior, molded into one. It's clear that she's uncomfortable with that. She leans toward another aspect of the Force and it isn't one I can teach her."
By now, Leia was well aware of what Jaina was suggesting and, somehow, she wasn't surprised. It sounded right in a way that nothing about the past several months had. She couldn't have explained it any better than Jaina just had. "She isn't a warrior," Leia took her turn to laugh, and tears of pride brimmed in her eyes. "She's a healer."
