Chapter 7- Too Close for Comfort

Squall stood with Rinoa out on the terrace of Garden's balcony for what seemed like hours when the sun was finally making its descent in the west, traces of the impending night appearing before them. Stars were beginning to sprinkle the ever darkening sky, and the moon began to shine. Squall suppressed a yawn behind his gloved hand, feeling his eyes growing somewhat heavy.

The whole entire day had been one of overwhelming, emotional exhaustion for the young Commander of SeeD, and he thought longingly of his bed waiting for him up in his dormitory. Rinoa wrapped her arms tightly around his waist and he could feel the warmth of her body pressing against his, and he slipped his arms around her, drinking in the sweet comfort she emanated.

"Squall, I know you're tired," Rinoa stated, matter-of-factly, her dark eyes piercing his own. "Why don't we head back to your dorm so you can get some sleep before heading back to Esthar in the morning? I'll stay right with you if you would like for me too?"

Squall nodded his head while trying to cover up another yawn.

"Sorry," he apologized, rubbing at his tired, aching eyes with his fingertips. "Yeah, I suppose I am."

He pulled away from her and she grabbed hold on his hand, as the two made their way down the dark, and now quiet, corridors of Garden. Soon, they had reached his dorm and Rinoa was slipping off her duster, while Squall shrugged off his jacket, pulled off his gloves, laying them on his desk. Rinoa was already turned toward the bed, pulling down the covers while Squall plopped down, unbuckling his boots with another yawn.

Rinoa laid down and patted the mattress next to her with a small smile.

"C'mon, Squall. Lie down. Get some sleep. You've had a rough day."

Squall nodded in agreement. Yes, honestly he had. The headmaster had laid more responsibility on him than anything he'd ever handled before, he had fought with Sis, but more importantly, Laguna Loire, President of Esthar was his father, and he never knew it. For 17 years he had lived his life, never knowing he had a parent out there still alive. Why? Squall found himself pondering once more. He brushed back the bitter thought, trying his best not to think so he could just sleep and laid down next to his sorceress, rolling over onto his side to face her. She reached a hand up to brush locks of hair out of his eyes and traced her finger down his scar.

"Just sleep. Everything will look different in the morning."

Squall sighed and closed his eyes, trying to relax, but the nagging sensation about Laguna kept playing with his mind, preventing him from lapsing into the much-needed sleep he desired.

"Rinoa, what if it doesn't?" He finally asked. "I honestly don't even know how to begin to deal with something like this. What do I say to him?"

Rinoa sighed softly, continuing to stroke his forehead, and Squall finally closed his stormy, tired eyes, enjoying the comfort the dark-haired woman was providing for him.

"Squall, please. Don't worry about that right now. You need to go to sleep, forget about everything for tonight, and we'll figure things out tomorrow morning once you're more awake and have had a restful sleep. It's not important right now." Squall listened to the soft chime of Rinoa's voice before they eventually began fading out and he found himself drifting off into what he had hoped was a peaceful, calming sleep.


Squall stood in the Central Hub of a busy Balamb Garden, surrounded by his group of fellow SeeD members and Rinoa at his side. The gang of SeeDs followed their Commander out into the open, standing near one of Garden's many crystal blue pools of water, small, trickling waterfalls splashing into it. He watched with a tender feeling in his heart as his friends all chatted animatedly with him and one another, and it was all he could do to keep from smiling. He felt Rinoa's arm around his waist pull him closer to her and he equally squeezed her back.

The young SeeD commander didn't seem to notice that it was growing quieter by the moment around him as the students that had been noisy and busy, were disappearing one by one. He was so focused on Rinoa and his friends, that he didn't actually notice it until Selphie gave out a small cry. Inclining his head toward the younger girl, Squall couldn't help but gasp as Selphie held out her arms.

"S-Squall!? Irvine!? W-what's... what's happening to me!? Quistis!? Rinoa!? Help me!"

Squall started to rush forward, but something invisible, almost like a barrier or shield was holding him back. Much to his horror, Selphie's arms were beginning to fade, turning transparent, followed by her legs, torso, and her face, screaming was the last thing he saw, before the cries from his other friends were soon following Selphie's.

"NO! SELPHIE!" Much to Squall's horror, his friends were disappearing before his very eyes. "ZELL! QUISTIS! IRVINE! YOU CAN'T! DON'T GO!" Squall lurched into the invisible shield holding him back. He pounded, punched, clawed and slammed into the barrier separating him from his friends but to no avail. He listened to their anguished cries and watched helplessly as they all seemed to fade from existence the same way Selphie did. He whirled around toward Rinoa and ran for her, reaching for her hand to grasp it. "Rinoa! NO! YOU CAN'T GO TOO! PLEASE!"

"SQUALL!" Rinoa cried out as she whipped her arm out toward his, trying to grasp his hand, and much to his dismay, Rinoa was thrown violently from the invisible barrier surrounding the Commander.

He fought and pushed and shoved against the force field, beating into it until his fists were raw, ignoring the cries of anguish leaping from his throat as he watched his beloved Sorceress slowly clamber to her feet and she too began fading from existence. Everything around him was growing dark, and the only sounds that could be heard were him screaming Rinoa's name, Rinoa crying out for him, along with her anguished screams echoing all around him as the love of his life disappeared before his very eyes and he was powerless to stop it.

"NO! PLEASE! NO! RINOA! ZELL! QUISTIS! SELPHIE! IRVINE! NO, YOU CAN'T! NO! RINOA! DON'T LEAVE ME!"

"SQUALL! HELP US! PLEASE! DON'T LET IT TAKE US!" came another desperate, familiar female voice from behind him and he whirled around, just to see the images of Ellone and his parents, of Raine and Laguna, being pulled away, fading into darkness, into nothingness.

"MOM! DAD! SIS! YOU CAN'T! NOT MY FAMILY TOO! PLEASE, NO!" Squall howled, not caring if there was anyone else around to hear him or not, but it was to avail. Nothing but black, empty void that surrounded him, and the SeeD Commander sunk to his hands and knees, landing heavily with grief and despair. "I'm... all alone..."


"NO! YOU CAN'T! RINOA! MOM!" Squall writhed, the sheets tangled up in his legs and his eyes flew open as he flailed. He flew upright in the bed, unsure if he was still lost in the darkness.

"Squall! SQUALL! CALM DOWN! Squall!" Rinoa yelled, reaching over him to grasp onto her knight's wrists. "You were having a nightmare! It's okay! I'm here! I'm right here. Squall! Look at me. LOOK-AT-ME." Rinoa demanded, and Squall whipped his head in her direction, breathing heavily, sweat sliding down the sides of his face, brow, and neck. His chest heaved with every breath, shuddering gasps escaping his lungs.

"R-Rinoa? Rinoa. I can't. Don't go. Please, please don't go."

Squall didn't even care about how pathetic he sounded, he just grabbed ahold of Rinoa and held her as tight as he could without hurting her. She felt warm, real, and not like she was disappearing in his arms. It took him a moment to realize that it had all been just a terrible nightmare. He felt a sense of comfort and a strange ache in his throat fill him as Rinoa wrapped her arms just as tight around him, holding him as close as she possibly could.

"Squall, what on earth? I'm not going anywhere. You have nothing to worry about. I'm right here, okay? Right here. I'm with you." He buried his sweat-soaked face into the crook of her neck and swallowed hard at the lump that had formed in his throat. "It was just a dream. It wasn't real. Whatever you saw, whatever you felt, it wasn't real, okay? I'm real and I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

"W-where are Zell, S-Selphie, Quistis, and I-Irvine?" Squall stammered, his entire body trembling in Rinoa's hold. "Are they okay?"

"They're fine, Squall. Everything is fine. Everyone is in bed asleep. We're in Garden. Everyone is completely safe and nothing happened," she soothed, running her slender fingers through his hair. "You really scared me. That must have been some nightmare. Do you want to talk about it?"

Her voice whispered as she laid her head on top of his. Squall just shook his head. He felt that if he'd said anything at all, he may just fall apart right there in her arms, and no way was he going to allow that to happen.

"It's okay. Shhhh. C'mon. Let's lay back down. Nothing will happen. I promise. You just lay here with me and go back to sleep. I will never leave you. I will never go anywhere unless you're with me, okay?" Rinoa consoled her knight.

"I saw my... my mom and Laguna and Sis. They disappeared, you disappeared and I just...I don't want to be alone," was all Squall could say as he and Rinoa lay back down.

She tenderly reassured him that he would never be alone again, and she cradled him that night. Allowing him to lay against her shoulder. Rinoa lay with him for hours, stroking his hair, whispering to him softly before finally lulling the shaken SeeD back to sleep. She made sure to stay awake long enough to make sure he was really sleeping before finally drifting off herself.

The morning dawned rather dreary and grey. The sky showing impending signs of more rain. Balamb Garden was still parked outside of the orphanage judging from the sky. Squall's eyes fluttered open as the dull morning light broke through his dorm room window, and felt his face pressed against something soft. Rinoa still had her arms wrapped tightly around him, the same way she'd been holding him when he'd finally managed to fall back to sleep, one of her hands still buried his light brown locks. His face was resting just above her breast, against her collarbone. He blinked a few times, careful not to disturb her slumber as the memories of his nightmare from last night came flashing back into his mind. He felt Rinoa stir and slightly pull back.

"Mmmm hey," she murmured gently, stroking his hair with her fingertips. She scooted her slender body down the bed a little more so she was face to face with Squall and brought her hand down to trace along his jawbone. "Did you sleep better?"

Squall gave her a small smile and allowed a hand to trail down her bare shoulder to her elbow.

"Better than what I was. It was comforting having you here, Rinoa." He huffed a short breath, hesitating for a moment before breaking her gaze. "I... sorry about last night," he mumbled shyly. "It was just a really horrible dream. One that felt real."

He rolled over onto his back so he wouldn't have to look at those dark, chocolate eyes staring so intensely into his own, filled with so much worry and understanding. He wasn't ready to start off his morning this way. He had plans and things he wanted to do today. The Commander knew he needed to get his head on straight to take on the whole new challenge of possibly pursuing a relationship with his newfound father. Especially a complete and utter goofy clown like Laguna Loire.

"It's okay, Squall," Rinoa's soft voice sounded next to him as she propped herself up on one elbow, resting the side of her face in her hand and gazed down at the Commander. "Do you... maybe want to talk about the nightmare you had? Sometimes that helps."

Squall shook his head and pushed himself up into a sitting position in the bed.

"Nah, not really. I have too many things to worry about today. I need to get cleaned up and dressed and head to the bridge, so you should probably head back to your room. I gotta let Nida know we need to set a course for FH so I can go find Laguna, and...," his voice trailed off as he ran a hand through unkempt locks. "Yeah." He found he couldn't really say much more, and Rinoa just gave him a knowing smile with a nod.

Honestly... I don't even know if what I'm doing is the right thing or not... go to Esthar, find Laguna. Talk to Laguna. Get the answers I need, and then try this whole father/son thing that Rinoa and everyone else insists on. But what if it's not that easy?

Rinoa stood up next to him and placed a hand on her knight's shoulder, squeezing it gently.

"I know what you're thinking, and knowing you, you're probably overthinking. So, try not to think so much on this one, Squall. Instead of trying to use your brain so much, let your heart guide you with this." Rinoa placed her hands behind her back and leaned forward, shifting her weight from one foot to another.

Squall gave a small snort and glanced at Rinoa with a slight smirk. "Do you have any idea how cheesy that sounds?"

He ducked when Rinoa reached over to the bed and chucked a pillow at his head before marching toward the door in mock-anger, her feet playfully stomping, hands at her sides in fists. She glanced back over her shoulder, reassuring him that she was just kidding around by smiling and sticking her tongue out at him.

"One of these days, you're gonna stick that tongue too far out and a bird is-," but he was cut off by Rinoa's silly gasp of playful protest.

"Squall Leonhart, you are such a big meany. MEANY!" She laughed and blew him a kiss as she slipped out of his dorm room, leaving the Commander shaking his head in amusement.

"And she's the fearful sorceress people are supposedly so afraid of."

He tugged his clean clothes from their hangers and dresser drawers and headed towards the showers get himself bathed, dressed and ready for the day, wondering what it would bring him.

"A tiny girl who sticks her tongue out and calls people 'meany...' so complete horrifying," he said sarcastically, rolling his eyes as he strolled out of his dorm room and to the showers.

An hour later, a freshly showered, fully dressed Squall headed toward the cafeteria area, feeling his stomach actually growling and churning at him from hunger for a change, and not nausea from all the stress and pressure that seemingly fell on him out of nowhere. Luckily, the line wasn't long and shortly getting a tray with some eggs, bacon, toast, and a hot cup of coffee that would hopefully give him some energy for the day.

"Hey! Commander!" Came a shouting voice echoing from across the cafeteria and Squall glanced over to see the overzealous martial artist waving his hands back and forth to get the SeeD's attention. "Over here!" Squall sighed and shook his head, but saw that Zell was gathered at a table with Rinoa, Quistis, Selphie, and Irvine. He plodded his way over to the table and sat down next to Rinoa. "So, big day, eh? Heading back to Esthar to-,"

"SHHHHH! Zell! Squall doesn't want the whole school knowing just yet, so keep it down." Quistis scolded him quietly and harshly.

The blond man pursed his lips and pouted, but remained silent with his arms folded over his chest. Squall shot Quistis an expression of gratitude. This wasn't something he was ready for everyone to know just yet. It was only something that he'd discussed privately amongst his closest friends. He ate his breakfast in silence while his friendly chattered idly around him, pondering what would happen today when he finally did meet up with Laguna when the familiar chimes of Balamb Garden's intercom rang across the room. They all glanced upward.

"SQUALL THIS IS HEADMASTER CID! REPORT TO THE BRIDGE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. I REPEAT. PLEASE REPORT TO THE BRIDGE ASAP. THIS IS A MATTER OF GREAT IMPORTANCE THAT CANNOT BE DELAYED FOR LONG."

The headmaster's voice resounded and echoed. Squall could tell that this was something of the utmost importance, and if that meant waiting to go to Esthar, than he would. He was, first and foremost, a SeeD. His sole duty lie with Garden, and if there was a mission that required his full attention, that would have to come first. Family issues would have to come later.

Wonder what he wants this time...? I hope it's nothing too serious, but if so...

Squall pushed back his chair, leaned down and gave Rinoa a quick kiss, which was followed by a catcall from Irvine, rolled his eyes, dumped his tray and ran to the elevator. He pushed the button, waiting for it to lower and stepped on, his heart beginning to beat anxiously against his ribcage. The Commander was unsure as to why he felt so nervous. It couldn't be anything too extremely serious, could it be?

He tapped his foot impatiently as the elevator finally reached the lift to the bridge. Squall stepped on and soon enough had reached the bridge of Garden and what used to be Headmaster Cid's office. He was greeted with, not the headmaster, but someone else was standing where Cid normally would be. His dark hair streaked with grey tied back into a low ponytail, his light blue, collared and button-down shirt and usual khaki-colored pants. Squall had to hold back a gasp as the President of Esthar stood on the bridge waiting, his hands tucked into his pants pocket and his back to Squall.

"Laguna...?" The SeeD Commander questioned incredulously. "What are you doing here?"

Of all people and at this time of a morning? And I was on my way to see him... this is seriously awkward.

Laguna's head jerked upward at the sound of Squall's voice, as the lift came to a halt and he turned around to face his son. Squall was unsure why but the moment he met his father's eyes, he felt guilty. He moved to the side of the bridge, folding his arms and glancing down at his side, closing his eyes so as not to look into the earnest and almost pained emerald-colored eyes of his father.

"Ah yeah, heh... fancy finding me here, huh?" He raised a hand rubbing at the back of his head. "I... uh sorta decided to come out this way right after you left Esthar. Kiros and Ward don't even know I'm gone, but I'm sure they know why I'm gone or where I'm at, or something like that anyway." The goofy President laughed nervously, and Squall just stood staring at the floor, still unable to meet the man's eyes.

From the other side of the bridge, a heavier-set man clad in a red sweater vest and glasses, his brown hair smoothly combed stepped forward surprising Squall. He hadn't even noticed Headmaster Cid standing there and was in too much of a shock to bother with a proper SeeD salute to his Garden's headmaster. Cid cleared his throat and approached the young man, a knowing twinkle in his eye that made Squall feel somewhat uneasy, and he fought the urge to roll his eyes at the entire situation.

"Squall. I'm sure you're probably a bit stunned to see the President of Esthar standing here on the bridge like this, but considering the situation, I felt it necessary. I'm going to leave you with some parting words before I leave the two of you alone," the headmaster began as he placed a hand on the Commander's shoulder. "You only get one father and one life. Life is not just measured by how many battles we fight, how many people we save, but it is also measured by those important people in our lives and the memories we make with them. Squall, it may not seem ideal at the moment, but a father is definitely an important person. Treasure that while you can. A lot of the students here do not have that luxury. You have a chance now. That is all I will say." Cid lowered his head, pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose, stepped away and disappeared from the bridge.

Squall pondered briefly over Cid's words before he heard Laguna sigh heavily. He sure didn't know how to start a conversation with this man. Could he even hold an intellectual chat?

"So, I've actually been out here since last night. Your Headmaster Cid there sure is a nice guy. Letting me in, letting me talk and all that stuff. Even housed me for the night. We didn't tell you because we just... didn't want to burden you with knowing I was here. Cid felt it best we talk in the morning after you'd rested up. Not much gets by that man, that's for sure!" Laguna laughed nervously again, continuing to rub the back of his head.

"Look, this ain't a great place to talk. This thing can fly, right? Do you think...?" the President began, hesitating for only a moment and glancing up to meet Squall's light blue eyes once more, and Squall definitely did not mistake the flicker of pain that shone in Laguna's own green ones. "Might I make a suggestion?"

Squall waved a hand, letting him know it was fine and Laguna cracked a smile grin. "Maybe we could go to Winhill? I'd like to take you out to the pretty little flower field where your moth- where Raine is buried. It'll be a lot more private and quiet out there. We can visit her and... I dunno, maybe talk some? Like I told you back on Ragnarok before you guys went to fight Ultimecia. We really do have a lot to talk about."

Squall was a bit taken aback at Laguna's request, but in truth, he had to admit he was a bit curious, and maybe going somewhere quiet like that to talk to Laguna might help set the record straight on a few things. Who really knew, right?

I still don't know if this work or how this will even work, this whole father/son thing... but maybe Cid is right. Maybe I do have a chance now. Maybe I should take it...

"Sure," Squall replied dismissively. "I'll get Nida. He's Garden's pilot. He'll take us over to Winhill. Won't take long. Maybe about an hour so long as we don't run into any rough terrain or high winds."

Laguna's eyes seemed to brighten at Squall's words as the Commander called for the Pilot over Garden's intercom. It wasn't long before Nida was on the bridge and navigating Garden to Winhill, their next destination. Squall and Laguna remained mostly silent as they stood on the bridge, watching out the windows, watching the water go by, the different towns and land, and the Commander buried himself in thoughts once more.


A while later, Squall and Laguna were both stepping off of Garden and into the grassy plains just outside of the village of Winhill, filled with pretty wildflowers. A soft wind rustled petals and long blades of grass here and there. It was so warm, lush and green here, with splashes of color from each flower.

"It's just a little ways ahead," Laguna told his son as they walked forward and soon a single, lone gravestone began to come into view.

It was a white, marble color decorated with intricate designs and details. Engraved with Raine's name, and a golden angel wing motif across the top of it. Squall felt a strange catch in his throat as the memories of the time Ellone took him to the past flashed through his mind and of the woman with the long, brown hair, pushed back with a yellow headband and teardrop earrings dangling in her ears. She was adorned in a white turtleneck sweater and jeans bustling behind a bar counter cooking, scolding Laguna, and washing dishes. That woman was his mom.

Squall pictured her face as clearly as he could from what he remembered during Ellone's dream trips to the past. Her eyes were actually the same as his, now that he really thought about it. Her hair, the same color as his own. He heard the sound of her voice talking to a young Ellone about Laguna echo through his mind as the two men found themselves in front of Raine's final resting place. Now it made sense as to why Kiros had told Squall he looked just like his mother. He also recalled the time he was locked away in Galbadia's Desert Prison, after he'd just been tortured, the Moomba that had jumped and squealed, calling him Laguna. It really made sense. Now more than ever, and Squall was uncertain if he were ready to just accept something like that.

Laguna was the first to crouch down, his elbow resting on his knee as his other hand reached out to carefully place a small flower arrangement on his late wife's gravestone. He glanced up at Squall who stood at his side, the SeeD's throat feeling oddly tight. The only time he'd ever visited a gravesite was back in Trabia Garden after the missile attack with his friends, and that was more to support Selphie than anything.

This was very foreign to him and yet... he couldn't quite describe the odd feeling rising in his throat, and he wasn't sure it was a pleasant one. However, he watched as Laguna patted the ground next to him inviting Squall to kneel down with him. The Commander took a breath and slowly lowered himself down, crouching on one knee, and stared curiously at his mother's name etched across the marble rock. Unconsciously, he reached a hand out to touch the stone with his fingertips.

"Hey, Laguna?" Squall finally found the courage to talk after moments of silence between the two. His father glanced over at Squall, his expression slightly surprised.

If I don't ask him now, I don't know if I'll ever be able to... He sighed and shook his head. Now or never.

"What was... Raine... my m-mother... what she was she like?" he blurted out shyly, unable to meet Laguna's eyes.

Laguna chuckled. "Oh, man. Raine was... she was an amazing woman. I'll bet you saw her when Elle took you back into my past, huh? That was her. She could be harsh, she could be scolding and sometimes even a bit rude, kinda like you, huh?"

He laughed but Squall found his cheeks flushing, and he stared at the blades of grass brushing up against his mother's tombstone.

"She was just a tell-it-like-it-is kinda woman, but everyone in the village? They loved your mom, and so did I. She took care of me, nursed me back to health when I was near death, and I repaid her back in every way I could by exterminating monsters that got in the village or too close to the village so I could keep her and Elle safe, and anything else at all she needed help with. Though we had our moments. Moments where she was kind and caring. You know. This field is where I proposed to her. Oh, and did she love flowers," Laguna sighed wistfully with a sad smile, gazing down at the gravestone. He reached a hand out to finger the petals laying on her stone. "I miss her."

Laguna closed his eyes with a grin. "She filled the villagers' homes with those special white ones of hers. Only she had the magic touch that grew them. Nobody else ever could. She was stubborn as all get out too. When she set her mind to something, that was that," he added with another chuckle. "You really do remind me so much of her, Squall. Kiros was right. You look just like her. You're a spitting image of Raine. Especially your eyes. You have your mother's eyes." Squall lifted his head, inclining it to meet his father's earnest eyes once more.

They were so honest and sincere that he could hardly stand it and wanted to look away. Yet somehow he couldn't force himself to pull away from the look his father was giving him. So much could be said just by looking at his eyes. Words that Squall couldn't bring himself to say. He could see the years of remorse built up, the grief, the loss, and suffering, but also the happiness, the fond memories, and the overwhelming amount of love this man carried for his family and those closest to him. Even Squall. And he knew it, but somehow he struggled to grasp it.

His head was clouding up and he couldn't really form a rational thought. A strange emotion began to fill up his chest, something he never experienced before, and he felt his heart squeeze, his throat tighten and his eyes fill with burning wetness. Laguna's smile fell and the next thing Squall knew, his father was grabbing him by the shoulders and pulling Squall's face to his chest.

"Shhh, it's okay son. It's all okay. I'm here for you now," Laguna murmured, wrapping both arms tightly around his son's shoulders and resting his head on top of Squall's, one hand rubbing his back comfortingly.

The young man didn't even realize what was happening. His body stiffened, his arms just remaining at his sides before the first hitch of his breath escaped his tight throat and Squall found he could no longer swallow back the lump, and then he felt the warmth of salty water sliding down his cheeks and soaking into the front of Laguna's shirt. Another sob escaped him, and he realized he was actually crying for the first time in years, shoulders trembling as Laguna held him closer. But why? Why was he even crying? Was it really over her? He didn't know Raine personally. Just what he'd seen of her in Ellone's trips to the past.

What is wrong with me? What is even happening? Why do I feel like this?

Maybe it was the fact that during the time his consciousness had been taken back there, he'd spent that time with Raine, in a sense. Maybe it made him feel like he knew her, and now knowing she was his mother that made it even more real. Or maybe it was because he'd never really know her or what it was really like to have a mother. Maybe it was the fact that for the first time in his life, he had a parent there with him. One holding him closely and allowing him to just be a kid, to just soak up that comfort a parent has to offer.

Was this what Rinoa was talking about? That feeling of comfort and security from a parent? Is this what it was like? Perhaps it wasn't so bad. So, for the first time in years, Squall let himself cry, silent sobs catching in his throat, breath hitching, and he let the tears roll. He felt a warm, large breeze surround him. It brushed through his hair, almost as if a mother were tenderly threading her fingers through it, and he could smell the strong scent of those white flowers and thought he'd heard a faint female voice say his name on the wind, and he cried a little harder, still unsure as to why. Perhaps it was just the longing for his mother's touch at least once and it made his imagination play tricks on him. Truly, this was all beyond his understanding, but he couldn't stop.

"I'm sorry," Squall's voice tight and tinged with tears, unsure of what he was even apologizing about. He just felt he needed to. Laguna gently began rocking him back and forth in his arms.

"Nothing to be sorry about, son," the President replied his own voice tight and choked, and Squall could feel the man holding him, his father, shaking against him as well, and knew his father was just the same as him.

Maybe all of this was stemming from the fact that for the first time in his life, he was with both of his parents, one holding him and comforting him and the other no longer with them, but yet with them. At this point, it didn't matter. His mind was too jumbled to think. Overcome by emotions he didn't realize even existed within him had drained him of any rational thought. Nobody was there to see him. Nobody was there to witness this, to judge his behavior. So for now, Squall felt it was okay. It was okay to grieve for the mother he would never know and welcome the comfort of the father he would come to know.