Just Another Lorelai Gilmore
Disclaimer: I do not own Gilmore Girls or any of the affiliated characters/references.
Chapter 12.
Christmas Eve had come fast, and I was excited for the holiday. It had been a few weeks since I last saw Jess. He had headed back to Philadelphia the day after we had been in New York. He was supposed to have left the night, but we decided it was best he didn't leave right after that fiasco with Logan. My mom had of course thrown a huge tantrum after we described how rude Logan had been to Jess. She had called Logan plenty of names that evening, which cheered us both up.
Jess was going to be in Stars Hollow in a couple hours, and the anticipation was building up inside me. I was now almost fourteen weeks pregnant, and my belly had a slight pudge to it suddenly. I had been wearing a shirt just one size too big to hide the bump, but today I opted for a snug sweater. Besides, the townsfolk of Stars Hollow were bound to figure it out eventually. And even with the still fairly small stomach, I know somebody is going to notice and the rumors will fly. Still, I was anxious at how Jess would react to the pregnancy now being visible. Last time he was here, I only sometimes looked a little bloated after eating.
"Are you sure you don't want to stay at the apartment, or even the Dragonfly? It doesn't bother me if you just come home on Christmas morning, babe." My mom was doing some last touches of Christmas decorations around the house. We already had so many up, but she found a hidden box and declared she had to put it all up or Santa wouldn't visit.
I shook my head, not glancing up from my laptop, on which I was doing some work for the paper. "No mom, its fine. We're going to stay here, and all of us will wake up as a family and do Christmas morning right."
"Alright, whatever you say." She stopped hanging decorations and smiled at me. "I just cant believe we will have a little one around next Christmas! I remember when you were a baby at Christmas, you'd get so excited to rip open all the paper, and then you would just toss your gifts as if they were in the way of your joy."
I smiled back at her and rubbed my small bump, trying to imagine having a baby here during next years holidays. It still seemed unreal, as I'm sure most first moms felt this early in the pregnancy. And my face dropped a little, as a recurring thought popped into my mind. "Sometimes I wonder if jess will still be around too, ya know, after the baby is born. It's a little easier participating in this when the kid's not actually here yet."
Lorelai nodded and gave a sympathetic smile. "Only time will tell, hun. But I mean, he's already braved the grandparents and had a not-so-pleasant encounter with Logan, and all for you. Some would say, even after just meeting the grandparents, this kid would be a breath of fresh air. Emily is more drama than a baby." She shook her head. "But I know what you mean. He's not exactly tied to the pregnancy because its not his baby. In my opinion, I think he'll be around after too though. Jess loves you, everyone can see that. Hell, he comes back to this town way more often for you, than he ever did or does for Luke."
I nodded and sighed, shutting my laptop. "I think I'm going to take a nap before he gets here. I am absolutely beat." I gave her a kiss on the cheek and hugged her. "Thanks for the talk, mom. You always know what to say." And I headed off to my room to lay down.
—Jess' POV—
The bus dropped me off in the center of town and I headed towards the Gilmore house. As I approached the house, I notice Lorelai wrapping what looks to be, a third layer or garland around the porch rails. "So did ya rob the North Pole just to decorate your own place?"
She rolled her eyes and continued her work. "We LOVE Christmas here." She took a step back and looked over her job. "Ok, so it's a little much, but it was left over and I wanted to use it. It might have been done better if Luke had decided to stay and help…"
"But he wasn't feeling the Christmas cheer? I'm shocked." I held a hand to my chest and emphasized my sarcasm.
"Well Rory is still napping, but I have some coffee ready if you wanna head in?"
I nodded and followed her into the house. The outside of the house was no indication of their love for Christmas in comparison to the inside. I felt like the air was thick with holiday spirit and I wanted to gag. But I left a smile break as I noticed the stockings hung on the banister. All homemade with puff paint names written on them, and the last one hung had 'Jess' across it. I sat my bag down just outside Rory's room and continued into the kitchen with Lorelai. "Thanks." I grabbed the mug of coffee she had extended to me.
"So how was your train and bus ride over?" It was a little weird sitting here with Lorelai and Rory not around, but for the most part I could hold a decent conversation with the woman now.
I shrugged my shoulders as I swallowed my gulp of the hot coffee. "It was whatever. Though with the few trips I've made, and the ones I'm sure I'll be making even more often in the future, it's made me think of getting a car."
She beamed a smile at me. "That's awfully grown up of you, especially if it's not another clunker from Gypsy."
"Hey don't hate on that car. That car got me many places." She put her hands up in surrender on the subject. "I've actually got quite a bit saved up, I could probably put down a nice down payment on a good car this time around. I figure with the baby coming, I'll need something reliable anyhow." I didn't let it show often that I thought of Rory's kid, but when I did just now, I felt extremely vulnerable. And the huge grin on Lorelai's face just made it worse. "Yeah, yeah I know."
"I think its great you're thinking that far ahead." Her eyes darted to Rory's room and back at me, as she leaned in. "Between you and me, she's been a little anxious over the future and well… if you'll be here after the baby is born. Now she will kill me if she found out I've said this, and then I will kill you. So keep your mouth shut."
I shook my head. I understand why Rory would be anxious, but I had hoped she would have more confidence in our relationship. "Honestly, I'm scared out of my mind. I was telling Luke this other day over the phone. I'm not scared because the kid's not mine and its not that I don't know how to handle that. I can get over DNA not being shared, but I don't know how to help raise another human." I looked down into my coffee to avoid the eye contact.
"Rory's scared too. So you're not alone. This is a very big, scary ordeal for anyone. Having a first kid comes with all sorts of emotions. And I'm sure if you're around enough, you'll get the hang of everything just fine. It will just come to you, the way it will come to Rory." She patted my hand lightly. "Thanks for being there for Rory. I really don't know how she would get through any of this without ya, kid."
"You and Luke are bound to realize someday soon, Rory and I are not kids anymore." I rolled my eyes.
"One day, you'll understand why we always look at you guys as our 'kids'."
Just then Rory's door creaked open and she appeared into the kitchen. I straightened up in my chair. "Hey there, I didn't want to wake you as soon as I got here."
She leaned down and gave me a kiss. "You should've! We only have a couple days together, I don't want to waste them in bed."
"Dirty." Lorelai shot out, her and Rory shared a laugh and I'm sure I looked as uncomfortable as ever. "Alright you guys, I have to go check on the Inn, I will meet up with you for dinner tonight."
Rory pulled on my arm and led me to the living room, where we plopped down on the couch together. She flipped on the TV and cuddled up under my arm. I looked down at her and my eyes wandered to her stomach, thinking of the conversation I'd had with Lorelai. And then I noticed the ever so slight bump that was now there. Cautiously I moved my hand over and rested it on her stomach. I could feel her tense up, and I caressed my thumb lightly over her sweater. "It's so weird, I was just here a few weeks ago and now you're already getting bigger." She looked up at me with uncertainty in her eyes. "Hey, this…" I looked down at my hand over her stomach, "Doesn't scare me away. I kind of like it, you sport the whole baby bump pretty well." I smirked and she let out a laugh. "Seriously though, you don't need to look at me like I'm about to bolt just because you're kid is growing in there. I've said it once, and I'll keep saying it until you believe me. I'm not going anywhere, Ror."
"I love you, Jess." It was just a whisper, but it was the best sound I'd ever heard.
I leaned in and captured her lips. "I love you too."
—Sorry this one took a little while to get out! I hope you're enjoying! Thanks for the reviews and thanks for reading!!—
