"If you don't settle the hell down, I swear to God, I'll make you turn owl and shove you in the trunk," Sarah growled heartlessly.

Jareth swallowed the urge to screech at her. He'd initially offered to fly to her parents' place, just to avoid a scene like this, but the relative distances made that highly impractical. He still tended to forget the staggering size of this country, compared to the mortal realms he'd known in his youth. And he could not simply pop up Above wherever he pleased – the location had to be tied to the book, or to a runner, or to Sarah herself. He could have let her go to her parents' house and summon him through the mirror there, but even he admitted that would be difficult to explain.

He knew about cars, of course. He'd been Above too often not to. It was just that he'd never needed to be in one. It was a plastic and steel cage surrounding him, piloted at ridiculous speeds by a woman whom he knew to have more courage than caution, and who had admitted she only drove the thing once a week, at best. So as she slipped back and forth between other drivers, charged through intersections, and took turns at appalling speeds, Jareth scrunched himself in the corner gripping the door and hissing with each new impending doom.

It did not help at all that Toby was in the backseat, paying more attention to his phone than to their imminent demise. Perhaps the boy was inured to this madness by long exposure.

Someone's car was abruptly much too close, he could've reached out the window and smacked their side mirror, and Sarah cursed and tromped on the accelerator so that their vehicle leapt out of the way like a bee-stung horse. Jareth curled his lip and snarled, glaring back at the offending car, and one of its tires popped, sending it careering off to one side.

"Hey, no magic road rage," Sarah scolded.

"Dude, you really need to chill," Toby chortled from the backseat, clearly amused by his suffering.

Frustrated beyond measure, furious at their dismissal, Jareth did screech then, letting the owl's sound of displeasure rise from his human-seeming throat, and had the satisfaction of watching the boy drop his phone as he yelped in shock. Even Sarah startled, glancing askance at him, her green eyes wide. "You are both clearly insane," Jareth snapped, gripping the door frame tighter.

At least, Sarah slowed the car a trifle, moving over to the rightward lanes. "Seriously, Jareth, it's okay," she said in soothing tones. "I know it looks like we're going to crash, but that's just the way people drive around here. We'll be up on Palisades Parkway in a minute, it's not as crowded. We just have to get over the bridge."

He glowered, and then saw through the maze of glass and concrete the bridge she meant. Jareth swallowed; it was enormous, and looked to be suspended by steel cables from enormous steel towers. Steel and steel and steel! No wonder his kind remained Underground. He couldn't imagine how the dryad stood it.

Sarah changed lanes again with much too little space to spare, and drove through the toll plaza, then onto the bridge itself. She must've thought she was reassuring him, because she continued, "Besides, even if we did get in a wreck, Volvos are very safe cars."

"Do not speak to me of wreckage," Jareth growled through gritted teeth. "I am entirely too aware that only a little plastic shields me from the steel of which this car is built. I have no desire to find out which of its parts would burn through my flesh, if we were wrecked."

That gave both of the humans pause as they realized exactly why he was so unnerved. Jareth tried closing his eyes as the massive steel cables flashed by outside his window, but that only made him worry more, so he turned his miserable gaze on the doom all around them.

"Maybe we should've taken the train," Toby offered, sounding concerned. "It takes about six hours, but it's slower. And there's no other traffic around it."

"Too late now," Jareth grumbled. "Besides, I think I should rather get this over with swiftly. Not too swiftly, Sarah, I do not wish to die squashed into jam like a strawberry in this metal death-trap." She patted his knee, trying to comfort him perhaps, but Jareth wished she'd keep both hands on the wheel.

Just then, a car cut in front of them, into much too narrow a space. Sarah stamped on the brake, throwing him into the seat belt she'd insisted he wear, and followed that action by sounding her horn and snarling a few choice remarks about the sexual practices of the driver who had offended her. Jareth was far too perturbed to point out that she could not justifiably make such an insult when she'd performed the same acts on him, but Toby teased her about her language as if they hadn't just pulled the very whiskers of death, yet again.

The bridge ended in a warren of echoing concrete tunnels, the noise of all the cars in such a small space making his ears ring and his teeth ache. Jareth did close his eyes then, as every sense he possessed told him he was about to die crushed like an insect, and only his trust in the queen beside him kept him from trying desperately to escape.

That, and the utterly unperturbed boy in the backseat. Toby had no qualms in questioning or calling out things he found suspect. If he could focus on his phone, then perhaps they were not truly in danger.

Or perhaps humans were all delusional. Jareth longed for warm stone, the sound of the wind rustling through the hedge maze, even the smell of the bog was preferable to the burning-oil stench of car exhaust.

It grew quiet, eventually, and after a few moments Sarah said, "We're on Palisades now. Jersey isn't my idea of scenic, but at least it's green. It should be better than the city."

Jareth looked, and was soothed to see trees and grass and a blue sky above. Even their speed, which was even more reckless than before, was not as horrifying when he could look out at something he understood. Jareth allowed himself to relax a fraction, looking about with some curiosity. He knew, of course, that she spoke of New Jersey, not the the Jersey farmland in England, just as her city and state were called New York after England's Yorkshire area. "Sarah," Jareth began questioningly, "You said your parents also live in New York, the state, and we began in New York, the city. Why then are we in New Jersey?"

"Because we crossed the Hudson River where it's easier," Sarah said. "Long Island is kinda weird. It hangs out off the coast of Jersey, New York, and Connecticut. Hell, even Rhode Island and the coastal parts of Pennsylvania are closer to Long Island than most of upstate New York."

Toby perked up then. "Have you ever seen a map of the U.S.? Or like a road atlas or something? I don't suppose you'd have much call to look at maps here."

"I am accustomed to generating my own aerial view," Jareth replied. "I've seen maps of your land in passing, but never scrutinized them. Your system of states is rather complicated. Some of the boundaries are arbitrarily drawn, whereas the bounds of our kingdoms usually follow natural lines. And your national government seems rather more involved in the running of individual states than the High King ever is in our realms. Thank the gods."

"Well, the states aren't meant to be individual countries," Toby explained.

"They are sized like countries," Jareth retorted. "Have you any idea how vast your land is, compared to Europe? No wonder Americans never developed any manners. You could always move away from people who annoyed you. We had not that luxury."

The ensuing cultural debate kept him occupied for most of the drive. By then, they were in a small town which at least looked like a plausible Underground town to him, with shops lining the main streets, and wood or brick homes on the side streets. The asphalt street and concrete walks were still ugly, to his eyes, but the homes and their carefully tended yards were pretty enough. Jareth let out a sigh, and shrugged his shoulders to re-settle his metaphorical feathers. Even in this form, even glamoured to look like as ordinary a human as he could bring himself to portray, he still had a few owlish mannerisms. Luckily most of them were far less obtrusive than his angry screech in the midst of traffic.

They parked in the drive of a two-storied home, which Jareth eyed appraisingly. His visits Above were limited both in time and by the necessity to remain somewhat near either the book, or Sarah herself, so he had never bothered to evaluate any real estate here. Thus he could not have guessed the value of the house, or the wealth of its occupants. It hardly mattered. In some ways, such as certain freedoms and leisures, all of Sarah's people were richer than any but the most highborn fae. And in others, such as magic or any kind of connection to the living world around them, they were all desperately poor.

From what he could see, it was a well-built and neatly-kept home, which meant that they had all the comforts they needed. He could guess that Sarah herself was reasonably comfortable, in terms of finance, and so her parents likely were as well. Still, it would not do to make himself seem incredibly wealthy. Mortals Above tended to get embarrassed by displays of largesse, in this century and this country.

"All right," Sarah said, blowing out a breath, and he realized she was nervous. Whyever for? He thought she'd come to appreciate her father and stepmother more now that she was an adult, and most importantly, not living at home. Jareth looked at her with some surprise as she continued, "Okay. Got the cake, got you glamoured up, we're all going to pretend this a nice family dinner with my boyfriend whom I've known since college, but they've never seen because you've been overseas the whole time and we only talked online. All right. We can do this."

"I promise not to say anything about goblins," Toby said, and when Sarah groaned he added, "Or about you being, you know, queen of fairy kingdom full of said goblins."

"No displays of magic," Jareth said. "They won't know I am anything other than your handsome and slightly eccentric British boyfriend."

"Slightly?" Toby scoffed, and Jareth mock-glared at him.

For that, the boy had to carry the dessert, and Sarah preceded Jareth up the walkway to the house. The door opened before they arrived, and her stepmother stepped out, looking just as nervous. Jareth had seen glimpses of this woman before, visiting Sarah in his owl form, and age had softened some of her brittleness. But now she looked taut and worried again, and he chose to set her at ease before her tension and Sarah's could play off one another. "You never told me you had a sister, precious," he said, stepping forward, and taking the woman's hand while she still looked surprised. Jareth bowed over it with all ceremony, saying, "Pleased to make your acquaintance, miss."

Even as Sarah rolled her eyes, the woman laughed at him, the fraught moment breaking at the sound. "You're a few decades too late for 'miss', but thank you," she said. "I'm Karen. You must be Mr. Kingsley?"

"Unless Sarah has another handsome British man stashed away somewhere, yes," he replied easily. "I haven't been in the States long enough to know for certain. Perhaps she collects them."

"Shut up," Sarah groaned, while Toby tried not to laugh inanely.

Karen invited them all inside, hugging Sarah and kissing Toby, who only looked a little embarrassed at this maternal affection. All the while Jareth was assessing the situation, looking for his cues. It evidently hadn't occurred to either of them that he'd never been invited to dinner in a mortal home, and had no idea what etiquette demanded of him. As before, at the dryad's interesting lunch, he adapted to each moment as it came.

Here came Sarah's father, a stolid and serious-looking man, his cuffs and collar tightly buttoned. He was a lawyer, a profession Sarah had thought she needed to explain, but there were interpreters of law in every court Underground. It was a banal profession, in the truest sense of that word that sounded like an insult, and which only meant that Robert Williams concerned himself with hard, realistic facts, not with fae fancies. A man like this would not just go mad in the Labyrinth; he might destroy himself trying to prove it was not real.

Karen was making the introduction, standing in the foyer, and Jareth clasped Robert's hand firmly, but not too firmly. Had the other man tried to crush his knuckles, he would've been surprised to find himself unable to do so, but it seemed he was not given to such tricks. He shook earnestly, looking intently in Jareth's eyes as if to spot some falsehood there.

And there were many, many lies to find, but like most honest men he did not know where to look. There was no ill-intent for him to see, and that likely concerned him far more than the absurd reality that he was locking gazes with a fae king. Jareth smiled, telling him, "It's a pleasure to meet you at last, Mr. Williams."

"Please, it's Robert," he said, his voice even and pleasant. "Come in, have a seat. Karen has dinner just about ready. What would you like to drink?"

Jareth did not know precisely how to answer. Not all mortals drank wine with their dinner, as evinced by Toby's surprise in being served the same at his sister's coronation. The safest option was to say lightly, "I will have whatever you're having, thank you."

"Cabernet, then," Robert said.

They all managed to bustle into the dining room, where Sarah groaned as they were seated. "Oh, Karen, I told you you didn't have to roll out the silver and china. It's not a state visit."

Jareth arched a brow; the table settings did not look unusual to him, but she acted as though these were the sort of dishes reserved for visiting royalty. Karen, meanwhile, smiled nervously. "Sarah, please, nothing less for a guest."

"I told you it's no big deal," Sarah replied, his queen's expression a mix of fondness and exasperation. "You really didn't have to go to so much trouble for the two of us."

"Oh, it's no trouble, you know that. Sunday dinner should always be an occasion," Karen demurred. "Robert, will you bring out the roast? I'll get the veggies. I hope you like scalloped potatoes and broccoli, Mr. Kingsley."

"Jareth, if you please," he said, and added with a roguish grin, "I am most delighted by food I need not prepare myself. It will be well enough, I assure you."

The roast which Robert carried to the table was rack of lamb, its savory scent pervading the air, and Jareth did not need to pretend pleasure at the aroma. The vegetables that followed smelled just as tasty, and he followed Sarah's example in shaking out his napkin and placing it in his lap. This meal would be a delight.

Karen still seemed rather nervous, hastening to dole out portions of food to everyone while Robert carved the lamb and Sarah poured the wine. "So, what do you do?" Robert asked him.

He and Sarah had planned this in advance, after he met her coworkers and before they even discussed introducing him to her family. The vast number of mortal occupations dizzied him, and they had needed to settle on something he could plausibly fake. "I am a management consultant," he replied as scripted. At least a century and a half of kingship gave him some qualifications regarding leadership. "In that capacity I was of some use to Sarah's previous firm, though the one where she now works is quite well-managed enough. Not like some I've seen."

"Sounds interesting," Robert said. "So you travel around to different companies and help them streamline their management processes, make everything more efficient?"

"And point out what their employees have been saying all along, usually, but they will not listen until an outsider says so, in more expensive words," Jareth added drolly. "And you are an attorney, correct?"

"Corporate law, right," Robert replied with the satisfaction of a man well-suited to his work.

They talked of his business, and Karen's, for she was a legal secretary. "I used to work for Kader Smith and Williams, Robert's firm, but back then it was just Kader and Smith," she explained. "I left when we started dating. You can't have any kind of impropriety in the legal business, not if you want your clients to trust you."

"I offered to change firms," Robert put in. "My name wasn't on the door yet, I could've left just as easily."

"Well, I found a new job first, and Mr. Kader wanted you to stay on anyway," Karen replied. She seemed to be relaxing now that Jareth had not turned his nose up at the food, and that was as well.

Sarah thought she might be able to breathe out, finally. Jareth had gotten Dad talking about the job, which was a sure way to get on his good side, and he was nodding or chuckling in all the right places. Toby, meanwhile, was going for seconds already, and that was perfectly normal.

Of course, the talk ebbed eventually, and Karen stepped in with the topic Sarah dreaded. "It's been quite a long time since Sarah brought one of her boyfriends over for dinner," she began.

Just that lead-in was enough to make Sarah want to scream. Hadn't she asked Karen to just act like this was a normal dinner? Maybe not bring up why she was bringing along a boyfriend immediately? Sarah resisted the urge to sigh her frustration loudly, already opening her mouth to change the subject. The last thing she wanted was for this dinner to devolve into a sit-com level joke.

Leave it to her little brother to get there first and get his hit in. "Yeah, not since Barfton," Toby cut in.

If there was one thing she emphatically did not want to discuss, it was any of her former relationships. Especially not the man who had tried, and failed, to replace the man across from her. Some topics were better saved for privacy. And possible heavy liquor.

But her father managed to cut the comedy routine before it could get started. "Toby, leave your sister alone about that. Her relationships are her business," Robert said warningly, and the boy smirked in Sarah's direction.

And Sarah knew just what was going through that devious little brain. Don't you even think about it, kiddo. You know how much blackmail I have on you, too. The look she cast at him was decided unfriendly. "It's fine, Dad. Toby is just being a child. Barton was a nice man, a good man. I really hope he's happy, wherever he is now. We were just from two different worlds and ended up wanting different things. In the end, he just wasn't the right one for me."

"But I most decidedly am," Jareth said, catching her eye and giving her a slow, warm smile.

It was so unexpectedly candid, and in this company, that her heart stuttered and she lost her train of thought for an instant. She could only look at him in surprise. When she could speak again, she managed to grumble out, "Hush, you."

"Barton really was a wonderful man," Karen said, always willingly to compliment the underdog, but added, "You're right, still. He really was one of your most surprising, really, if I'm honest. I couldn't see you staying with anyone that…"

That was enough to make her grin, knowing where this was going. "Normal?" Sarah supplied, even as Toby put in, "Sane?"

"I was going to say mild-mannered," Karen replied, chagrined.

"That would never do," Jareth told them. "Strength of will and character in a woman demands the same of a man, if he would keep her. And as her parents, I am certain you know just how strong Sarah is. I can only hope to remain her equal." Sarah shot him a smirk then. Oh, that was triple the points on his charisma card: he managed to compliment her and his prospective future in-laws in the same breath, as well as a subtle one to himself. It was a feat worthy of the Goblin King and not a bit surprising.

Toby, however, didn't miss a beat. "Well your ego is certainly strong enough."

"And your determination to be a pest is equally impressive," Jareth retorted.

Karen looked aghast, while her father shot him his best trademarked You Had Better Watch It, Young Man look. "Toby, that's enough," Robert said, while Sarah rolled her eyes. It was better if they got used to the comedy routine now.

"It's okay, Dad, these two have been giving each other grief since they met," she said, cutting Jareth a warning look. "I think they both enjoy it, so let them rip."

Jareth returned the look with a smile. "Precious, the three men you love best in all the world are sitting at the same table. Be glad that there is so little friction; Toby and I at least are being playful, and I cannot begrudge him his amusement. After all, no one can ever take your father's place in your heart, but Toby must worry that you may someday choose your lover over your brother."

She felt her eyes bugging out a little at how casually he dropped both 'love' and 'lover' into that response, peripherally aware of Karen's eyebrows going up, but Toby was too quick to respond. "Nah, I'll always be her brother, even when you finally marry her," he shot back. "You just better get used to not having your own way all the time, 'cause she's no one's doormat. I'm just trying to help you out there."

Any reply Jareth could make was cut off by Robert saying, in a falsely cheerful voice to mask his surprise, "I had no idea we were discussing marriage already. But then, Sarah, I see you have two new rings, and one of them's on your left hand."

It took a moment to process what her father was saying, still glowering at her obnoxious baby brother when he had spoken. Her gaze going to him with a confused frown, her eyes lit on Karen and the look of amazed but gleeful shock her face, and she could feel the horror dawn on her. That lead to a disbelieving look at the hand rested curled around her wineglass and the gleaming opal ring there. Oh shiiiit. She and Jareth locked eyes, both sets widening in surprise as they thought in unison, We forgot to glamour the engagement ring!