Dana and Juliet had occupied two of the bar seats and Chloe had jumped in for Dana. Kate and I were together and we were attempting to have fun and dance around to the music. Of course, this was neither of our scene and we were out of place. It took a while for the haircut to start messing with me, but when my back started to feel like it was being poked by tiny needles, I dragged Kate into the club's restroom to help me.
Kate helped with my shirt and got the little hair that Chloe cut off, pulling on my shirt and patting me down.
"Does it really look that nice?" I asked. It was my old hairstyle, but something about it did feel better. I couldn't put my finger on it.
"It looks very nice on you, Max." Kate ran her hand through my hair. "You should stick to having shorter hair."
"I think so too." I nodded. "Am I good now?"
"I got most of them out, so I think you're good."
"Thanks."
As soon as I turned around to look at Kate, a girl ran into the restroom and started to throw up in one of the stalls. That was the third girl that had to do that, along with friends following behind to help. I could only chuckle anymore and feel sympathy for them.
"Do people actually find these places exciting?" Kate asked. We leaned against the wall next to the hand dryer. It wasn't super clean, but it didn't go beyond posters and graffiti.
"I think so. Chloe and Rachel seem to enjoy it." I folded my arms and crossed my ankles. "But, I'm just here for Chloe, so I don't personally enjoy this."
"Victoria took me to one of these things once," she sighed after, as if tired from just thinking about it. "I left without her noticing, though."
"She was mad at you, wasn't she?"
"You're right to assume that." She nodded and laughed. "Didn't take long to forgive me; we live together after all."
"At this point, you can't really convince me that she's nice anymore."
I'm not sure if she was just a shitty ass person or protective of Kate or something really is wrong with me. I think it was the last one, but just like with the last three girls that ran to the toilets to barf, I was slowly caring less and less. It was still empowering to feel.
"She's nice, I promise. She just needs to warm up to people. Like a cat, you know?"
"That's very fitting."
We eventually left after a forth girl came in and her gagging noises were echoing and making us feel sick. We sat outside on the curb (our second favorite place to sit, apparently), watching cars and letting the warm night relax us from the hectic atmosphere inside.
"Chloe won't drink here, right?" Kate fixed her dress to cover her legs.
"I trust her right now, especially since she's sick. She's hella strong and I also trust that Dana's paying attention too." I hugged my knees.
I should be keeping watch because Rachel told me to, but I wanted to talk to Kate and she didn't have to tell me that she wasn't having fun inside. Rachel should understand.
"Must be hard for her right now," Kate sighed. "Addiction is a very difficult thing to shake off."
"Hey, with someone like Rachel in your life, you just want to do what she says. Plus, they've been together for so long, Chloe wants that as long as she could."
"They're very much in love, aren't they?" Kate had a dreamy smile on her face, like she even enjoyed the thought of that.
"Yeah," I drew out. "They don't know it, but they're both thinking of marriage and it's so awesome. I hope I don't have to do anything about that."
She weakly snickered, "That's a personal thing between couples, Max. I know they consider you their child, but if they're serious about marriage at their age, then they'll talk about it. Though, it would be nice for them to do so."
"What about you? You think about marriage like that?"
Kate did a wistful sigh and rested her head on my shoulder, then hugging my arm. I rested my head on top of hers.
"It crosses my mind," she said. "But, school is too important right now and I don't have money for either one. What about you?"
"To be honest, not really. I was never good at talking to people I liked, so it never came to mind. Is that weird?"
"Of course not." She replied. "Marriage is very important and should be thought through. I would hate to divorce…"
"I can't imagine anyone divorcing from you." Hell, I couldn't imagine not being friends with her. It felt like a hollow space, almost, imagining time without her.
She giggled, "That's reassuring. I love love."
"I could tell."
Hearing cars pass and staring up at the star-covered sky, we were so comfortable. I was relieved to be away from Victoria; Kate probably did too to some extent.
"Were you… really going to kiss me?" I had to ask.
"I was going to move to your cheek. I knew you wouldn't want to do that, but of course, Victoria walked in on us."
"Right… Friends kissing would not be good…" I murmured.
Kate hummed, "Max, we both told each other that we kissed our best friends, so it wouldn't be so far-fetched if we kissed each other."
"Is that an invitation?"
"It's an observation." She responded and looked up at me to smile.
My heart raced and my hands felt clammy. It would be better if it happened more naturally, unless Chloe suddenly dares me again but to Kate instead. Then again, both Chloe and Victoria seem to have odd, yet perfect timing when it came to Kate and I sharing romantic moments.
They're cockblocks and they know it. Life is… unfair.
"Sharing a bed with you seems to be really complicated." I move my arm under her and hung it around her shoulders.
"I just never did that before. Whenever my friends did sleepover, they slept on the floor or on the couch or outside of Victoria's door to anger her."
I laughed at the thought of anyone sleeping in front of Victoria's door like a sad dog. I was tempted to do that too, because I knew that Chloe would dare me to do something as stupid as that. But, with Kate on me right now, it reminded me of something better than pissing Victoria off.
"I can't wait to sleep in later." Kate brought up.
"What if I wake up before you somehow?"
"Then wake me up. I wouldn't want you to be lying there in your lonesome."
"That's fair." I nodded.
"Are you guys done being cute and shit or should I pretend I was never here?" I heard behind us. We raised and turned our heads, and Chloe was there, standing over us.
"Uh... Pretend you were never here?" I awkwardly replied. Chloe scoffed at me, ruffling with my hair, "Come on, gotta drive home. I just worked for fucking free."
Not arguing any longer, we headed back to Kate's apartment and got ready for bed. Luckily, Victoria wasn't home yet, so all of us had a chance to get ready at our own pace. Apparently, she took hours and forced Kate to hurry up if she wasn't there first.
Kate went first, so Chloe and I sat on the couch, ignoring each other while we were on our phones.
"Hey, Max," Chloe grabbed my shoulder and shook me around. "Yo."
"Yeah?" I put my phone down on my lap and turned to her.
"Were you guys making out earlier? If you were, I'm hella proud of you," she patted me on the back. "And sorry for messing it up again."
"No, we weren't. Not in her room or outside. We talked about it, but I don't know, it feels tense and kinda forced."
"Ah, right, well, hate to say it, but you should try to make a move on her too."
"How do you know that I wasn't the one making the moves this whole time?"
She gave me a look, like she was saying "are you fucking cereal right now?" She didn't have to see it with her own eyes that Kate was the direct one between us. I huffed at even asking that.
"Who am I kidding." I folded my arms. "She still hasn't told me that she's ready for a relationship yet."
"Maybe she won't tell you through words. I'm just being hella gay here." She held her hands up defensively.
"I don't want to assume what she wants, Chloe," I fell back on the couch, landing on the pillows. "She's the one who still feels… I dunno. She's still being kinda mysterious about it."
"Just show a little aggression," she bumped her arm into mine, "Like, fuck, you need to do your side too."
She was right. I tried my best to do what I could, but everything just felt like I was crossing boundaries, no matter what. I was more scared of messing anything up than anything. Getting this far was an accomplishment in itself, like what my therapist said!
"Let me think about it." I decided.
The bathroom door opened and Kate walked out in her pajamas (even though it was hot, she had a sweater on) and still drying her hair, "I left towels for you guys in there, so just jump in."
"Thanks, Kate." I nodded and turned to Chloe. "You wanna go first?"
"Since you insist." Chloe didn't argue and started digging through her bag to get her things. Once she got everything and closed the door, Kate sat down next to me.
"She seems to be feeling better." Kate continued to dry and rub her hair in her towel.
"Yeah." I nodded.
After that talk with Chloe, I was feeling awkward and I couldn't stop thinking about it. My hands were shaking and I was overthinking to the point that I'll go brain dead.
"Are you gonna lock the door tonight?" I asked, forcing it out of my throat with as much confidence I had.
"I'll close it. Are you more comfortable that way?"
I slept in the living room for a good month or two, so I didn't care what door was closed. Victoria was just the big obstacle I had right now, from her timing to how aggressive she came off.
"I'm sure she was more upset at us nearly kissing than being in the same bed." She tried to reassure.
"Are you sure about that?"
Kate didn't seem so confident, but replied, "I'm sure."
I believed her, yet didn't at the same time.
It didn't take long for me to get ready for bed; I needed ten minutes flat to do everything I needed to do. In that small time frame, I was having conflicting thoughts.
I didn't want to put Kate in an uncomfortable situation, but at the same time, Chloe wanted me to finally start doing something about it. As I passed Chloe, who was lying down on the couch with a black-and-white blanket, they were still annoying me. At least she got a blanket, unlike me who got a bed sheet last time.
"Goodnight, Chloe." I waved my hand at her.
She waved back, "G'night, remember what I told you."
I silently nodded and went into Kate's room. She was reading her Bible as she brushed her own fingers through her hair. There was a post-it on the outside of it now: Matthew 11:28. She smiled at me for a second, then went back to reading. I smiled back and shut the door behind me.
I didn't want to bother her, so I put all my clothes back in my bag and hopped into bed, prompting Kate to swiftly get into the same position as we were earlier, continuing to read to herself. I wondered how long she read for, but I kept quiet anyway. Something about the room is tense. I don't hate it. I just wonder what it is.
She quietly shut her book and reached over to put it back, turn off the light, and mutter a, "goodnight, Max. Sweet dreams."
"Goodnight, Kate." I whispered back.
I couldn't shake the feeling off anymore. It was overwhelming. We were alone, in the dark, and we're together... I had to take a chance. The least I could do was kiss her forehead or the top of her head. We already had two almost-kisses and it's whatever if I just do it against her forehead! Friends do that all the time. I built up the courage, gripping her shoulder and went down to kiss her forehead.
I was proud of myself. It happened so quickly. But... it didn't feel like her forehead. It felt different. Still soft. Still warm. But... different. Neither of us said anything for a moment, unsure of what just happened.
"That was for... to make up for earlier..." Kate choked out.
I forced a smile, "Yeah..." What did I do?
