Steph: You got it, dude! I'll get those notes from your other class.
Me: Thanks, Magic partner.
Victoria: Okay, I found some shit on that disgusting trash.
Victoria: FYI, I know you broke into my room! Assholes.
Me: Why do you lock it? Let Kate in.
Victoria: It's only fair. I guess.
Chloe and I were already in her car, packed and ready to stay somewhere else for four days. We left the next day in the morning, after having to wake Chloe up and make her drink a whole pot of coffee to stay awake. I really wanted to still sleep, even after downing two whole mugs of the drink, I continued to yawn and let my eyelids fall heavy.
Me: Okay, what did you get?
Victoria: She still lives in Oregon! She delivers fucking pizza. I checked the reviews and like, 1 star out of 5? She's garbage and her work fucking sucks. It's by the academy they went to, so it won't be hard to find. Just find a low-budget version of you.
Me: You think I'm high quality?
Victoria: You're the original movie and she's the awful TV spin-off.
Me: I'm honored.
I huffed as I listened to the rock music playing on the radio. It was attached to Chloe's phone so we'll have music constantly.
"You still haven't talked to Joyce yet?" I asked, raising my voice over the guitar riff.
Chloe turned the music down, "I mentioned it through a text message. I asked if it would be hella weird to randomly show up at the house or at the Two Whales. She said she'll be surprised but would be happy to see us again."
I sighed simply at the thought of the diner, "Can't wait to eat the Two Whales pancakes again…"
"Would be nice to have that again," Chloe chuckled. "Hell, I could go for that damn meatloaf if that meant eating my mom's food again."
"Would you really?"
"… No, I'm not that desperate. But, some pancakes or just fucking breakfast would make me happy. I think we'll be there when it's night, so no time to go to Two Whales."
"Damn it… How long is the trip?"
"Eight hours, give or take."
"Holy shit," I slouched in my seat. "Are you sure you'll be okay?"
"Dude, I drove all the way to San Francisco. I think I'll be fine going the other way. We took like four stops for gas, but we still made it out alive."
I nodded, quiet and looking out the window at the passing gas stations and fast-food restaurants. I tried to think of something to talk about, while we had the energy for a conversation.
"You're not gonna like this," I started, "but I sorta heard you and Rachel talking the other night."
"You're right. I hate it."
"Are you gonna finally admit that you want to marry her and want her to take your last name?"
Chloe tapped her fingers on the steering wheel, avoiding answering as I sat there, waiting. I started to follow her movements with my own fingers and tap against my knees.
"Okay, fine," she finally gave in. "I want to marry her! Happy?"
"Hella happy." I smiled.
"What are you gonna make me do now? Get my and her mom's permission?" Her tone was more mocking than serious.
"That would be nice!"
She groaned, "Go to sleep already."
She reached over and pushed me into the car door, playful and had a small smile on her lips. I laughed before I rested my head on the glass, closing my eyes.
"Hey… hey… hey Max!" I was awakened, disoriented and my body shaking around. My dream stopped at a strange point—when I was about to get chased by whatever entity there was. I hate weird dreams like that. Wowser, that was a lot.
When my eyes adjusted, I realized we already stopped at a gas station.
"How long was I out?" I asked.
"Two hours." Chloe opened her car door. "We're running out of gas and I need to take a leak. Do you want snacks or some shit?"
"Uh… no, thanks." I took my phone out from the cup holder in between me and Chloe. Kate had sent me a couple of pictures: one of a drawing she did of a full classroom and one of her hanging out with her friends.
She said, More filming today. Had to make some props beforehand.
She was smiling in her group selfie. Along with Erin, and two other people I didn't recognize. One was a guy who seemed to wear gray as much as Ledah did and the other was in a white, sleeveless hoodie and had short, cropped hair. The two actresses were also in the picture, but they were blurrier than everyone else, telling me that they got into the picture suddenly. She looks happy here. I'm glad she went out to see them.
Me: Nice! Who are the other two again?
I stretched my legs out as I looked out and saw other cars getting filled and people going inside for snacks or other things. I was feeling suddenly nervous. Joyce's reaction could be anything at this point. Though, it sounded like it was positive from the text message. The feeling couldn't be helped.
My phone buzzed: Ben and sirimiri! There was a lot of people at the party, but they were there.
Right, I nearly forgot everyone who went there. Some I just happen to have classes with or met before, but everyone else was a blur to me.
Me: There was. I still feel bad for forgetting about them.
Chloe came back and started to put gas into the car, while holding a bag of Funyuns in the other hand. She left the window open, so I leaned over a bit to ask, "Should I be anxious? I'm not sure if I'm anxious or not."
"Honestly, I'm hella terrified. That bitch that hurt Kate is gonna get got."
"That's what I'm terrified of!" I was scared for whatever excuse or explanation she had to give us. I wasn't having any of it and I couldn't give her any benefit of the doubt.
Chloe put twenty dollars worth of gas into the car and got back inside, opening the yellow bag, and eating a ring. She put the bag on my lap and started the car, driving out and onto the road again.
"Maybe we should call some friends up?" I suggested after eating a yellow ring. "To fill the void? I don't want to fall asleep every time you stop."
"My friends and girlfriend have jobs." Chloe reminded with a groan. "And your friends have school or some shit. We have no one to talk to except each other."
"Is there something you want to talk about?"
Chloe stayed quiet as she reached over and grabbed a ring from the chip bag. She was clearly thinking about something. I waited for her to reply, watching her in wonder and my heart thumping in my chest.
"I guess… thanks for helping me through this?" She began. "I was a piece of shit back then, huh?"
"You became someone different, sure, but that's okay. You found Rachel and you were happy again. I know what I did was fucked up and I was scared to say anything anymore. I never forgot. Chloe, no matter what happens, I'm there for you."
"Dude, I forgave you already. We went through so much shit at Blackwell. After everything and how we stayed by each other, how could I not?"
"… I haven't forgiven myself. I still wish I could fix it somehow."
"Hey, we're best friends! You've put up with all my shit! Right now, I'm trying to stay sober and not drink while Rachel's gone and you're watching me. I even hid the other fucking drinks I had. I want to be better again. I want to be there. I feel like I'm worth something with Rachel and… you know, you. Picking up what I'm putting down?"
I smiled from ear to ear. I'm proud of her. It's the first step to becoming healthy again. "Yeah, got it. Then, we left together so I could go to school. You came along and pay for everything, even when you didn't have to. Corny, but I'm thankful and grateful."
"That's hella corny. But, thanks, love you too."
After that, I kept waking up and falling asleep. Every time I was awake, Chloe was busy driving and getting angry at other drivers. Sometimes, especially when the sun started to set, I took pictures of the sky and the busy road, to pass about three seconds of boredom.
We eventually led to a game of I-Spy, when we just pick a color and the other person must find it.
"I spy with my little eye… something blue." I started off with the light on the car's ceiling; Chloe kept a blue Christmas light like her old truck had.
"The fucking sky?" She was annoyed at this point.
"Not true, the sky's pink and yellow too! Try again."
"That car." She pointed her finger to a speeding Mini Cooper passing us.
"Nope."
"I was gonna say my hair, but it's not fucking blue anymore!" She slammed her hand on the steering wheel. "Um… my shirt?"
"Nope, but it is a nice shirt."
"Thanks, also fuck you."
"Come on, you have to actually look around."
She groaned and her eyes darted around the car. She eventually found the light and started to exclaim and hitting my arm, "The blue light! It's that shit! I know it!"
"Okay!" I tried to grab her hand as she kept aimlessly punching and slapping me on my arm and my hair. "You win! Alright!"
"That's right!" She stopped and focused back on the road. "I spy something red!"
"Your rose tattoo—"
"Fuck!"
As I laughed, my phone started to ring. I didn't expect the area we were in to have such good service, but as I saw "Rache" with her face I.D. light up, I was both happy yet confused.
"Didn't you say Rachel had a busy schedule today?"
"Uh, yeah, why?"
"She's calling." I answered it and put it on speaker, resting it in the cup holder. "Rachel?"
"Hey!" She greeted. "I'm just waiting for my hair to dry. I'm at a photoshoot and had the time."
"Oh, like you had to wash it?"
"Yeah and you know, dye it a little bit, cut it a little bit, just for fashion ads and whatever."
"Is it blue?" I asked suddenly.
"I wish! But no, it's an icy blonde, that's what they call it. I don't know, I'm hella not into it."
"I'm pretty sure Chloe would like it."
"Are you…" Chloe raised her eyebrow, "hitting on Rachel for me?"
Rachel laughed, light-hearted and bubbly, "Your comment is appreciated either way. She wouldn't answer my calls, so I sent another voicemail and a text message. Are you guys doing anything today?"
Chloe shook her hand near her neck, mutely telling me to not say we were on the road back to Oregon. It forced me to think on my toes.
"Nope, Chloe's wacked from work at HUE and I was swamped with homework."
"You guys sure sound like shit too. Why do I have a feeling you two are lying to me?" She sounded more suspicious of us than heartbroken.
"Why would I ever lie to the hottest girl I've ever met?" Chloe asked.
Rachel replied with a pleased chuckle, "Valid question. Gotta go, apparently more hair things to do. Love you, bye."
"Love you."
"Love you more!" Chloe added at the end.
The call ended and I said with a chuckle, "Rachel didn't talk to us this much the other time she was gone." Not in a bad way. It's way better.
"Now she knows I have issues and you have g-issues, so I'm pretty sure she's just checking on us."
"… What are g-issues?"
"Gay issues."
"You're gayer than me."
"I have a girlfriend and did not accidentally kiss her in the dark."
The conversation ended after that. I clearly lost that verbal mini-fight and, to be honest, it was hard to be mad when Chloe spat out the hard truth.
The rest of the drive—minus the gas station stops—was smooth and dull. The car lights on the freeways going towards Oregon were littered with red lights, bright and hurting out eyes. I took a couple of photos, though blurry since the cars kept moving and changing lanes. It was nighttime when we finally arrived in Arcadia Bay; still as quiet and dark as we remembered it. We couldn't see much apart from the few streetlights, but she drove down the road, passing the pier and Blackwell. I was able to see the Two Whales in the dim lighting we had to work with. Chloe drove into the more "suburban" part of town, up to the blue and white two-story house.
The house looked the same as we last saw it, even Chloe's truck was still parked on the side in the driveway, untouched and still as rundown as before. The stickers for the expiration was up-to-date, so someone was still paying for it. Chloe parked next to the truck and turned off her car, but then she just sat there. She gazed at her house, like she didn't recognize it. She sighed, happily.
So, we both sat. The motion-sensor light in the driveway shone down on us and, when I looked close enough, her blue eyes were glassy, as if she was going to cry at any second. I had to take a picture of that, too. I'm nervous to see Joyce again. And Chloe's old room. I bet it looks exactly the same.
"Alright," she said after the photo finished developing. "Let's head inside?"
Even though she wasn't sure, we got out and held all our stuff on our backs, and approached the front door like awkward turtles. Chloe hesitated to knock on the front door, too.
"I would hella take the window to my room, but we have too much shit." She said as she turned to me. That gave me an idea.
"Leave your stuff with me," I said. "Go to your window like you usually do and surprise Joyce like that." It's a pretty dumb idea, to be honest, but it wouldn't be "Chloe coming back home" if she didn't go through the window.
"I like the way you think, Max Planck." She tapped her finger against my temple and dropped her stuff to the ground with a thud. I turned around as she climbed the tree in front of the house to get to her window and I rang the doorbell.
It took a good five minutes before the door finally opened, with Joyce in a robe and with her hair up in her big hair clip she had. She looked like she was sleeping a moment ago.
"Max, what a surprise!" She jolted back, but she was smiling. "What brings you here?"
"I have four days to spare, so why not spend it in Arcadia Bay with you?" I said with force. It was obviously a lie and that I was at her door, at eight PM, with enough bags for two people. Plus I was going during a school week.
She hummed, hand on her hip, "I doubt that, but I'm letting you into my house anyway." She then grabbed the backpacks on the floor and brought them inside.
As I walked in, I saw Chloe at the very top of the stairs, walking down slowly.
"Why did you come alone? Chloe didn't want to see me?" Joyce chuckled, putting our bags down. She went to sit down at the dining room table and I sat across from her. It was perfect: Joyce's back was facing towards Chloe and I could keep watching her.
"More like she didn't want to see David."
"Yes, that sounds more like Chloe. How have you been, Max? What brings you back to this small town?"
"On a whim, I guess? It was a quick bus ride."
"What bus did you take? Sounds like you rode a cheetah all the way over here." She laughed at her own joke.
I chuckled a bit, "I was asleep for most of it. By the way, is David even here?"
"He got called in late at Blackwell because some students broke in. I thought you and Chloe had come back and got in again—Really reminded me of you two."
"Those were the good days."
"Those "good days" of yours gave me a real headache."
"You know, mom," Chloe snuck up and placed her hands on Joyce's shoulders, "it would be good to lock the windows."
She jolted, yelling in shock, and had to doubletake, "Chloe Elizabeth Price! Don't you scare me like that!"
They still shared a warm embrace through some laughter. I could hear Chloe say, "missed you" and Joyce say, "missed you too" back. Another picture.
"Okay, now tell me," Joyce pulled away from her daughter first, "Why are you really here?"
Chloe shrugged her shoulders and asked me, "Dude, could you go upstairs? This is hella private." It's really not, but it is her mom, after all.
"Right," I got out of my seat and went up the stairs. I was planning to go to Chloe's old room, but instead, I got halfway up and sat down on the steps.
"I just really wanted to see you again, mom." Chloe started to conversation.
"Even when you move away, you're still my daughter. You put me through a lot of shit, but I still love you. Is there something upsetting you?"
Chloe did a sarcastic laugh and then said, "I wanted some… help."
"Financially? You know I always help—"
"No, I can handle that now. I just… I wanted to say sorry for all the bullshit I did. Now, I know I have a drinking problem and I wanted some advice."
"Chloe, you had every right to be mad and upset back then. I still wish you and David had a better relationship."
"… Even I admit that I wanna try. I'm willing to ask him too about my problem…"
"Sweetie, he's really trying to be better. You can trust him. Tell mom all about this drinking problem."
"You probably know this, but Rachel and I are still together. She doesn't drink anymore, not even a sip, but in my case, I drank it like it was water. Max couldn't tell me; Rachel had to. I drank at night and cried about her. It feels hella shitty to say, but from what they told me, I cried about Rachel not being around and… even thought she was dead. I've been sober for a few days, but one night… I drank so much. I don't remember anything, but there's a stain on the wall, I think I threw a bottle at Max. And Max… I think I was beating her up a little bit. I'm such a fuck-up, mom."
"No, you're not, sweetheart. If you were, you wouldn't be here talking about it. You would still be in California doing that."
"At least I'm doing something right." She chuckled at herself, but a weak one. "What the hell should I do?"
"I think what helps the most is what you'll gain. Who you're doing it for too. I've come to terms with you and Rachel and you two love each other. So, number one priority, Rachel. Think about Max and me too. Then, you'll have better health and you'll be happier too. Seeing you hurt and not talk about it was hard to watch, but I guess it was bad on your and my part."
I felt a smile grow on my face, hearing Chloe finally talk about various things with her mom and finally just speaking her mind without feeling so alone. I wish I could take a picture of their moment, but it was bad enough I was listening.
"I'm changing now. I gotta admit, Max made me finally say that I wanna marry her, mom. I want to be with Rachel. Another reason I'm trying to stop all my bad habits."
"I'm guessing the tattoos won't stop." Joyce said with a light laugh at the end. "I like the new hair. I thought you would stick to blue until death."
"I'm thinking about it. Thanks."
"And you and Rachel… just two peas in a pod. I guess all it took was time to finally bring the good out of each other. Have you and Rachel talked about it?"
"It's complicated. We talked about who would take whose last name. We agreed that her taking mine would be better."
"That doesn't sound complicated to me."
"I don't know. I'm still twenty-one. I just feel… scared?"
"Well, you're young, that's how it always feels. It shouldn't be so scary if Rachel has such a high-paying job. Not to mention, such a presence in the whole clothes and TV and whatnot. You guys met when you only had each other, so I think there's nothing to be afraid of."
It was quiet. I wanted to peer my head over and see what Chloe was doing, but I stayed hidden on the dark staircase.
Joyce continued to speak. "So, you're sure you want to marry her? That's something you want?"
"Yes, mom, I love her a lot."
"Okay, stay here one moment."
I ran up the stairs and into Chloe's room, jumping into the bed and acting distracted and on my phone. Turns out, the one text I got was from Dana asking how the trip back was like. I replied with, It was okay, to be honest. Slept more than awake. When I put my phone down, I noticed everything in Chloe's room was left as it was. All the posters she left, the graffiti, the flags, the mess—It was all still there.
I had to take more pictures of the room and, being in there, it reminded me of when Chloe was busted for having weed in her room. I took the blame, aka, the bravest shit I ever pulled at the time. I saw Joyce walk into her room and then walk out again, going back downstairs. I followed, putting the pictures and my camera back into the bag I brought with me.
"Here, Chloe, I want you to have this."
"Holy shit… Dad gave you this ring. I thought you pawned it off already or something."
"Well, I admit I had a little hope for you. I've never seen you so happy before and seeing you trying to build yourself into a better person, I think Rachel deserves this. Even though you seem to already tattoo your vows."
"Oh, no, I—thanks, mom. This is perfect."
I had a big grin on my face, feeling speechless and somewhat guilty I was listening in on this special moment. I went back upstairs again, pretending I was never there.
