Fallen to the darkness
- Juhani -
The heat of the desert ruffled through my fur. It was sweltering in its intensity, even in the shade of the ridged cliffs that created a natural border between the Eastern Dune Sea and whatever lay on the other side.
I cared not. This place was like what I imagined my ancestral homeworld to be; a desolate, barren wasteland. A graveyard of nothingness. It was the perfect place to disappear in.
The predators here were fierce; large reptilian creatures that were no match for my lightsaber nor my power. Their deaths were a testament to my might. I would stand strong in the darkness. I would.
For I had failed the light, and there was no turning back.
The corpses of three wraids were laid bloody in front of me, jagged rents in their bellies spilling looped intestines over the yellow sand. The coppery tang of blood lay heavy in the hot air. I could leave these corpses behind, and scavengers would eventually pick the bones clean. I had already eaten.
I was closer to Anchorhead than I preferred, for sooner or later I knew people would be sent after me. There was legislation surrounding the kills of beasts, even on this remote planet. I felt a snarl form on my face. Twisted, greedy bureaucrats. I took delight in raiding their mining parties of food and water. But I had not killed more than wraids, not yet, no.
Apart from the slavers on Taris, but that was a vengeance long in the coming. Those who had treated me so abominably as a child met their end at the point of my lightsaber, and it was well deserved. Even had I not failed the Jedi Order so disastrously, I would have believed in the rightness of my actions on Taris.
My eyes closed and I wrenched my thoughts away from the Order. Away from my only friend left, who was a good, strong Jedi Knight. Away from my Master, whom I had betrayed so horrendously. Quatra… There was no going back, not now. Had anyone failed their Knight trials so disastrously? Perhaps I would go down in the Jedi history books as the pathetic Cathar who struck down her Master in rage because she was too weak to face her own flaws.
A sob caught in my throat. I must move forward. If the darkness is the only path laid before me, then I shall travel it. For who could kill their own Master other than someone too corrupt for the Light?
The anger and the grief mingled within me, even after so long. It had been more than a year since I had run from Dantooine, run from my Master's corpse, and just kept running from planet to planet as the sickly self-hatred transformed into fury at the galaxy. This planet, at least, allowed me a reprieve. I could disappear from civilization and test my strength against the wildlife.
But the darkness calls. It did. I could feel it, taunting me, a presence that flashed in the Force and then vanished. I felt it the previous day, too. Weak enough to make me doubt my own senses, strong enough to make me cry for what might have been.
Fallen to the darkness. I cannot turn back. This was the next step along my journey, then. I would accept it, I had no other choice. Whatever this presence was, whoever it may be, they would taste my wrath for the interruption of my solitude.
And either I would fall to them and be at peace, or I would be one step more powerful.
My lightsaber cut a red beam in front of me. Once, I thought myself worthy of the blue I had found in a Dantooine cave. After my miserable failure, I had cast that aside in favour of synthetic red.
The Force rode with me, invigorating my muscles, enhancing speed, and aiding against the harsh elements of the desert world. I was drawing closer to the township, not far from the gates themselves, and within the territory those Czerka clowns thought of as safe. My senses stretched out over the dunes and picked up on the sentients nearby. There were few.
Just over the crest of the next sandy hill were three faint sparks and the electromagnetic oscillations of a droid. In this environment, it would surely have combat specifications. The pulse of power came from one of them. I am certain of it. I would take care of the droid first, then work out which one taunted me with their Force abilities they were now hiding. That was my target, my path.
And I would show I was strong enough for the Dark Side. It was all I had left, and it would be enough.
It had to be.
My steps slowed and quietened as I drew closer, stealing up on the strangers from behind. They were moving away from me. I could hear a young voice; bright, hopeful, what I might have been once.
"See, it's not so bad out here, Big Z. Komad wanted six mercs, well, I reckon you count for at least two. And Jen…"
"Statement: I have capabilities far beyond any fragile meatbag. Qualification: Once my shields are repaired, I estimate that my combat prowess will far exceed that of the Wookiee."
I drew the Force in; deep, tight, and life-enhancing. With a howl, I launched after them, 'saber held firm in one hand and ionizing energy crisping on the fingers of the other. Unnatural speed in my limbs closed the distance. As I cleared the hill, I saw them at last.
"Warning: Incoming hostile!" The droid was already firing despite my sneak attack, showcasing reflexes that far surpassed those of his companions. But it was no match for me; the bolts were cast aside effortlessly by my lightsaber. I snarled, unleashing my fury, and blue and white energy danced over the burnished red of the combat droid. My lightning had always been more effective against machinery than flesh, and with a hiss and a sizzle the droid deactivated.
I looked beyond the smoking scrap of metal.
A Wookiee, a Twi'lek and a Human. They all stared at me in dawning horror, and only the Wookiee had a weapon ready.
"I shall be your doom!" I howled. The Force blasted from my hand, a shock wave of power that tumbled them all off their feet.
There. There. A sharp flash of power so blinding it engulfed me in its fury, before vanishing once more. Like a mirage in the desert, taunting with its treasure before ruthlessly snatching it away. As the three of them scrambled to their feet, my eyes fixed on the human. She looked at me in terror, but it had come from her. It had come from her.
The Force built a wave of power inside, and I flung it at the other two with all my furious might. They froze, in stasis, that would hold for as long as I willed it. Incapacitated due to my strength.
"No!" the human cried in distress. Her green eyes were wide and uncertain under an askew headcloth, and she held a vibroblade limply at her side. That was a disappointment. Perhaps she wouldn't be the challenge I yearned for. "Please, let them go!"
I laughed, a dark sound, and pointed my lightsaber at her. Her face paled, and it was right that she should be afraid. "Who are you?" she whispered, and stumbled backwards in fright.
"I am Juhani, and you have disturbed my peace!"
Peace… would that I could have some.
The Force thrummed through my veins, urged on by my emotions. Once, I used serenity and peace to strengthen my power. Now, I could only use rage.
"Please… we'll leave you alone, just let them go!" Her voice was terrified and pleading, and I stepped closer. She raised the blade in a fumbling grip, and took another step backwards.
"Too late, human!" I snarled. It was too late for me, and too late for her. I strode forward, weapon raised high. The woman's face had whitened, and she glanced frantically at her helpless companions, first the hairy one and then the blue.
Her pale, petrified expression shattered.
She snapped her head around to face me. Her grip on the vibroblade firmed, and her eyes narrowed in a resolve completely at odds with her earlier fright.
"Let. Them. Go!" she growled in a deep, dark voice. Her face had twisted in a building fury and her chest was heaving. But the blinding Force, the sheer power I had sensed, was still missing.
I took another step closer, watching the play of emotions battle on the human's face. "Weak Jedi," I mocked. "Where is your power? Without it, the Dark Side will cut you down!"
"I am not a Jedi," the stranger said, eyes fixed on mine. Green eyes, spitting sparks at me. The colour of moss on a sodden tree.
The same colour as Quatra's. Quatra…
I wailed in grief at the memory and charged, launching a swinging blow straight at the human's torso. Her vibroblade came up to block, but I forced it down towards her body with unnatural strength. The red energy seared against her desert robes before she leaped backwards.
"You're a Sith then?" the woman hissed, taking another cautious step back.
"I am with the darkness alone!" I howled, slashing at her legs. She darted to the side, a hair's breadth from certain amputation.
"Who sent you?" she demanded, still edging away. "Are you after me? Or the Jedi brat?"
I bared my teeth, uninterested in her pointless questions. The Force reared up within my grasp again, begging to be unleashed, and I threw it at her. She tumbled backwards, like a flutter-gnat caught in a gale, and landed on her back with a grunt. I sprang forward with a stab towards her heart, but the human rolled to the side and my saber sank deep into the coarse, hot sand, turning it black. Black as my heart.
I spun around, 'saber raised once more, and watched as the human clambered to her feet.
"If you want a challenge, then you've got one," she told me, and her voice was cold. I could see the fiery hate building in her face. "But let the girl go. She is no threat."
I glanced behind to the two sentients, still powerless within my grasp. A frozen expression of horror was painted on the young Twi'lek's face. "You care for the girl? You are foolish."
The human looked around, as if seeking aid or inspiration, but there was nothing bar the loneliness of sand and heat. Her eyes fixed back to mine, and then further down my body. She frowned.
"Juhani, was it? Looks like you've seen your fair share of action." She was staring at my torso, and I glanced down. I had not paid attention to my state of clothing for a long time. Tattered rags covered in fresh and dried blood. I was missing a sleeve, but it worried me not. Vanity had never been a weakness of mine.
I smile an empty smile. "I hone my skills on the predators. And now, you. Time to die, human!" I ran at her again, and she held her ground until the last moment, before dodging to the side. I snarled, whirling to face her.
"Predators. You mean the wraids," she panted. "You're the one that's killing them? Wow. That's your big nod to the darkness?" Her voice had turned snide, twisted. She dares to mock me?
"I am more powerful than you could ever dream of being!" I roared. The heat of anger returned in a fierce wave, ruffling the fur on my neck. I ran at her again, 'saber raised to strike. Her vibroblade blocked once, twice, but it slipped under the third blow which seared a cauterized stripe down her side. She screamed, jumping back, and her light clothes flapped in the stifling breeze, a burnt edge of cloth smouldering in the air.
It had been a glancing blow only, enough to burn, but not injure. Enough to anger, but not frighten. Not yet.
"You are no match for me," I hissed. "I harnessed true power when I struck down my master! I revel in my darkness! I adore it!"
"Why are you trying to convince me?" she forced out through gritted teeth. "Unless you truly don't?"
How dare she question me? The uncertainty welled up, the grief, the fear; that this was the wrong way, that I had chosen poorly.
No! I had no other choice, not now, not after what I had done. I shall not be uncertain. I am steadfast!
I melded the Force together in a ball and slammed it into her abdomen. She was thrown backwards several metres, slamming into soft sand littered with the debris of sharp rocks. Her vibroblade fell from her weak grasp. The human grunted, coming up in a crouch, and I saw a droplet of blood make a slow path down her cheek. One hand pressed against her burned side as she glared venom at me.
I smiled coldly as she scrambled for her dropped weapon.
"Use the Force, so I can prove I am the master!" I cried. I wanted the challenge, not an easy slaughter. "I will kill you far too easily this way."
My eyes lingered on a trail of sweat that trickled down her face, mingling with the rivulet of blood. I lazily threw my lightsaber at her; she blocked it, but stumbled backward with the effort. It snapped back to my hand.
"Are you too weak to use the Force in battle?" I taunted.
"I – am – trying – to!" she snarled through gritted teeth.
I advanced again, two steps, and drew deep on the Force. It propelled me into a swift jump and, snarling, I raised my weapon to strike her down on landing. The human dodged to the left, and my lightsaber skimmed against her shoulder just as she backed out of reach.
Time to stop playing with her. If she will not give me a challenge, I will kill her now.
The black power bubbled within me. I shaped it. Moulded it into something hideous, and threw it out to poison her body. She choked, stumbling back.
"No!" she shouted in denial. I felt it as the venomous Force struck deep inside her, dragging at her limbs, closing her throat and slowing her mind. The Force could be a very powerful ally, and the empty smile grew on my face again.
I could see her anger transform into hatred. "I will not go down like this!" she screamed. Like a thousand tiny needles flung out to pierce me, I felt the raw power pulse from her once more and paused in surprise. What I sensed before. She is strong. The human snarled, and before I had time to blink, she gathered my own tainted Force energy from within her system and hurled it back to me.
I gagged, my muscles abruptly tightening in unnatural lethargy. What? She threw it back at me! My guard had been down and… I had not thought that possible. I lurched as the dark taint dragged me backwards. Her sheer power shone, and it was greater that mine.
And then it was gone again.
The human growled, a vicious sound, and ran toward me. She lunged, her attack frenzied and wild, and I found myself dodging for the first time. The next swipe I blocked, before gathering my wits and striking out at her. Even with the corrupted Force slowing me, she was no match. Not without the power that kept eluding her grasp.
I must finish her before it comes back.
"I will win this!" I yelled, and the Force flung out from my hand, pushing her away. She snarled inhumanely as a wall of energy buffeted against her, pushing her backwards, digging her feet deep into the sand. My fist clenched, and a weave of energy bent to my will, wrapping around her neck. Tightened, clenched, and she gasped in protest, her off-hand clutching at the invisible grip.
The stranger fell to her knees, growling and choking, her eyes emerald daggers of undiluted hate as she struggled against my superior power. I was skilled enough to hamper her breathing, but not to render her motionless.
And then a blast of pure energy had me sailing backward through the hot desert air as she threw off my constriction with ease. The power has returned, and it was blinding in its fury.
"You will bow to ME!" she shrieked in a voice that resonated with malevolent viciousness. I was back on my feet by then, and the human was rippling with energy. A sense of foreboding tiptoed eerily down my spine. I am in over my head.
But blank shock rocked through her green eyes, and the power vanished abruptly. She didn't mean to say that. She doesn't understand the darkness; she doesn't embrace it. I am the master here!
I growled, on the offensive again, and ran at her. She was snarling like a rabid kath hound as she blocked, her teeth bared as my 'saber sparked against the her cortosis-strengthened blade. The anger has her, but I am the stronger.
"The Force had failed you!"
She dodged the next blow, and struck out at my legs, but it was too easy to dodge backward. Without the Force aiding her movement, every attack could be predicted, every block could be overwhelmed, every opening could be used.
Now it is time to put her out of her misery. Now it is time to prove that the Dark Side is enough for me.
"If you will not use the Force, I will end it here!" I drew in the Force deeply, and focused on her blade. With a mental yank, it slipped out of her grasp and went sailing behind me.
The fear, the disbelief, the anger, battled for dominance on her face. But it was no match for my darkness.
I flung the Force out once more, a solid push of energy that slammed her to the sand. She fell with a thud.
"I am your doom!" I yelled in triumph and closed in.
I lowered my lightsaber ready to stab her through the heart.
xXx
