Our new cast walked back into the courthouse and approached Garfield, and all took a knee in honor. Chrom spoke first. "O Garfield, I believe Dat Boi was working for Diet Coke. It looks like what you said was true."
" I know, Chrom. And I know the dangers Diet Coke poses to us all. And that's why I called a certain someone to come here. He should be here any minute now."
With almost impeccable timing, everyone could hear a plane land outside the courthouse, and the courtroom's doors soon slammed open. A mist poured out, carrying the scent of Dr. Pepper. Then, a figure stepped out of the mist. It was Dr. Pepper himself, Barack Obama! "My fellow Dr. Pepperians. I, uh, I assume you know about Diet Coke. Perhaps you know it is, uh, it is preparing for revenge. It is imperative that, uh…" Shulk stopped listening to Obama's speech, as he suddenly had a vision. In it, Obama was giving a speech-it was the one he's giving right now! Before Obama could finish, he was struck by...Diet Coke! He crumpled to the ground, and quickly dissolved. Shulk's vision ended there, and not a moment too soon-he heard Obama start saying the lines from the beginning of the vision! Without thinking, Shulk sprang forward, and tackled Obama, pushing them both just out of range of the blast that immediately landed where Obama stood just a moment before. Samus and Squirtle jumped down out of the audience. Squirtle began to charge up Water Gun, and unleashed it at Obama. Fortunately, Obama jumped to the side-Squirtle wasn't using water. It was using Diet Coke! So this was who planned to kill Dr. Pepper.
MaRobin sprang up. "Everyone, protect Obama! We must defend him at all costs!"
Garfield nodded to Obama, and he understood. Obama struck a pose, and shouted out, "「 R」 !" Thanks to Obama's Stand, Diet Coke wouldn't harm anyone as much. Unfortunately for our band of protagonists, their attacks now did less damage too.
FeRobin smirked. "Honestly, it was kind of foolish for you to attack us with our numbers. I mean, how could you two win against all eleven of us? Besides, we have Garfield on our side." But then, the god spoke.
"Uh, actually, Robin, Rohan has written that I'm not allowed to fight anymore until part 8. And Obama can't attack while his Stand is active. Sorry."
Samus began charging up her Diet Coke blaster. But before she could fire, she was struck by an arrow. "Take that!" shouted Takumi, who was closely followed by Garon and Zelda. FeRobin chuckled cockily.
"See? Our numbers are too high. You can't win." But then, more figures jumped out from the peanut gallery, and Sailor Moon's eyes PK Widened. It was the rest of the Sailor Scouts! Suddenly, the numbers were far more equal. "O-oh…" stammered FeRobin and MaRobin simultaneously.
Zelda cast Din's Fire at Samus, but then Samus activated her 「 N」. She merely absorbed the fiery spell, and strengthened herself. She charged her blaster again, and fired at Zelda-a fiery blast, and Zelda was still in stunlock, so she couldn't avoid the attack. The impact sent her flying backwards...and out of 「 R」's range. Seizing the opportunity, Sailor Neptune ran out of range and used her overpowered Electroshock Arm, sending Zelda into the ceiling. The Hyrulian princess fell to the floor, knocked out.
Sailor Mercury, Sailor Venus, and Sailor Jupiter surrounded Riki. The Heropon had no choice but to use Freezinate, giving him a chance to break out. The Nopon child launched itself into a midair somersault, and rammed into Sailor Mercury. "Nobody tries to hurt Heropon Riki!" Sailor Mercury, still somewhat shaken from the blow, tried to use Hadouken. However, the Nopons were too small, and it went right over them. And now, Riki is Angry! Riki unleashed Tantrum, and Sailor Mercury got nyapakapow'd pretty bad.
Chapter 10.5
Editor's note: I'm back and I hope that the story didn't get messed up
Editor's note: Fuck
Elsewhere, back in the Smash Mansion's basement, back in the same dusty, dark room, the editor sits down, finally back from a long coffee break after he retired from attempting to fix the story. The smartly-dressed businessman we described 22 chapters ago might have noticed a lack of editing for 22 chapters. This businessman would have been told that this was due to 'delays in the penultimate agile development start-up product used for essential business ventures' or something containing similar buzzwords. In reality, the coffee break took 22 chapters. Yes, that's what happened. This businessman maybe have seen, once again, a look of utter confusion on the editor's face. Someone had tampered with his work during his coffee break! The editor was at first overjoyed, since that means he doesn't have to note his break, and he wouldn't be fired. But at what cost? The editor had literally zero idea of what happened over the course of his break. Who was this Rohan guy who snuck in and conveniently wrote down what exactly had happened? Who would possibly be crazy enough to write a story at this level of magnificent squalor? If this rotted manuscript of a story could be believed, Rohan was actually in the story itself- but that would mean…
Oh yes, Sailor Moon PK died somehow in a way that made PK sense and was PK plot convenient.
