Chapter 9

The group decided to do some more shopping at Coconut Mall, and split up into various groups. Lucina, Pyra, and the Robins went back to the food court, while Chrom and an inconspicuous Nyaruko-slam poster went to Macy's. Garon, Sue, the Wednesday Frog, and Garfield went to a karaoke bar. Garon was gonna kill it when Single Ladies played, complete with dance.

At the food court, they got in line for Auntie Anne's Pretzels, except Lucina because she had a hankering for Hardy's for some reason. Pyra ordered 4 pretzel dogs and 10 orders of cinnamon pretzel nuggets. The cashier, who was actually a very tired and bored Mega Man, was disgusted by the size of this order. He then asked MaRobin what he wanted. "The souls of humanity!" he bellowed.

"Sir, we serve pretzels," Mega Man answered.

"The Fell Dragon Grima does not want a pretzel! He wants souls!"

FeRobin sighed and facepalmed. "Ok, get him a raisin pretzel, I don't care anymore." She turned to MaRobin and placed her hand on his shoulder. "Ok, Grima, I've ordered you a soul."

"Thank you, worm. Perhaps I shall spare you in the future."

FeRobin groaned. Why did she have to be the one to deal with this? "I'll just have an order of original pretzel nuggets."

With that, she pulled out her wallet. But before she could pay, someone tapped her on the shoulder-"wait, allow me," Kanye West spoke as he stepped in.

"Wow! Thank you Kanye, very cool!" FeRobin responded, now in a much better mood.

Before they could start eating, though, they saw Meta Knight walk past. "Oh, no….does he know we broke out?" Lucina wondered. But luckily, she saw that Meta Knight was carrying bags of groceries-and Smash law dictates that you legally cannot arrest someone while you're handling groceries, regardless of their offense. So, the group ate their orders, and then got up and went shopping. As they passed the mall's GracieGrace branch, they could hear Meta Knight shout from the parking lot, "What eez my ship doing heer?", his Spanish accent finally returning after being absent for no real reason this entire time. A loud scraping noise could be heard, and the Halberd lifted off and flew away. So, they went into GracieGrace.

"Hey, Pyra, look at this!" Lucina shouted, beaming with energy. Pyra looked at the shirt she had picked out…it wasn't pleasant.

"Er, uh, n-no thanks…it's not really my style, y'know?" Pyra stammered, not wanting to embarrass Lucina for her awful fashion sense.

But then, Gracie appeared behind Pyra, as if she could materialize at will. "Nonsense, dear! This is a GracieGrace original. It's everyone's style."

"I-I'm truly sorry, but I just don't…."

"You don't what? Think it looks good? Are you saying I, Gracie, am a bad fashion designer!?"

"N-no! That's not wh-"

"I don't need to hear it. Besides, from your attire, I can see you don't know the first thing about fashion! Security!" So, some Fighting Polygons came and threw Lucina and Pyra out of the store, the Robins reluctantly following after them.

"Fool! You cannot just kick out the Fell Dragon!" MaRobin angrily yelled at the Fighting Polygons.

"Naga dammit…" FeRobin muttered. Then, she had an idea. "Lucina, lightly tap him with Falchion."

"Huh?" Lucina asked.

"Just do it."

So, Lucina did. She pulled out Falchion and lightly tapped MaRobin with it, who just stood there, confused. FeRobin crossed her arms, her glare becoming more angry. Seconds passed. A full minute. And then MaRobin realized what just happened. "W-wait! Auuuuugggggghhhh! It hurts!" he whined, trying to imitate the pain the real Grima would've felt. But it was too late-his bluff had been called, and he failed to step up. "F-fine…." he finally conceded. So, they went shopping elsewhere.

Meanwhile at the karaoke bar, Garon and Garfield were singing Single Ladies, somehow on-key yet also horribly off-key. How was this possible? Not even Garfield Himself knew. The song ended, and they ordered some fish sticks. Sue took the stage, and started singing that other beautiful song-Africa by Toto. Garon sighed, as it wasn't The Sign by Ace of Base, but he had to admit Africa was a really good song too. Of course, as an Inkling, Sue's singing was actually garbled inklingspeak. After, she joined Garon and Garfield in the consumption of fish sticks.

Eventually, Chrom and the Nyaruko-slam poster made their ways in, joining their pals as well. Garfield looked at His watch which He just now has, and spoke. "Well, look at the time. I have to meet up with Obama, but I'll probably be back in time for Part 10, who knows?" With that, Garfield teleported out.

But perhaps Garfield had left too soon-suddenly, Garon heard that cursed opening note sequence. He turned to the stage, and his worst fears were confirmed-someone all too familiar was there, ready to sing none other than their theme. "Haiyori masu ka? Sei no unari!" Of course, even Chrom knew only two songs began this way, and which it was soon became clear. "Slam! Jam! Slam! Jam!" For the one who had taken the stage was none other than Nyaruko-slam! She threw a malicious smirk at Garon's Royal Harem (except it still isn't his actual harem, don't question it) and sang the rest of the song. Afterwards, she too walked over, and stole a fish stick.

Chrom looked almost sad. "Nyaruko-slam, what happened to you? Why are you like this?"

"Uh, doyyyyy. Your daughter shot me. Like, a bunch of times."

"Well, maybe you deserved it? Besides, how do you keep coming back anyway?"

"As long as B-Ball exists, so shall I." With that, Nyaruko-slam pulled out a Thompson submachine gun from under her skirt (don't ask how she hid it), and aimed at Chrom. "Well, at least I can get some revenge on Lucina…" she cackled.

But then, she felt the feel of a gun pressed against the back of her head. Sue had pulled out a pair of Dualies, and had aimed at the silver-haired maiden. "Sayonara, bitch," Sue woomy'd, and pulled the trigger. Nyaruko-slam was splatted, and Chrom was safe. "Okay, who wants to sing another song?" So, the group sang Jake Paul's "It's Every Day Bro".