Chapter Twenty-One: The Choices We Make
The movie, in Bellamy's opinion, was terrible.
When he heard that he would be watching a movie in his AP Bio class, he had been pretty excited since it meant a break from the grueling notes that had been crippling his hand all week. He didn't even have any qualms with the movie being centered around DNA and RNA (which happened to be the unit they were studying) because Bellamy found the topic relatively interesting.
The only problem was the movie itself; the characters were drab, the color scheme dull, and the overall plot was just discomforting to Bellamy. He never understood why people made it their life long goal to make it into outer space. Space was an unpredictable void of cold and unforgiving variables. From a lack of oxygen to system failure, anything was a liability.
Bellamy shuddered at the thought and turned his attention from the movie to his phone setting on his desk, positioned in such a way so that the kid in front of him was blocking it from the teacher's view. He didn't have any intentions to text anyone, but when he saw he had a message from Clarke he didn't even hesitate before reading it.
10:23am
Did I leave my my history notebook in your car yesterday?
Clarke.
10:26am
Nevermind, I found it.
Clarke.
Bellamy snorted, a small grin taking form. He glanced back at the clock in the room before remembering that he could've just checked his phone for the time. It had already been two hours since she had texted him and she had found what she was looking for so there really wasn't a reason for him to text her back…
12:43pm
Is that an excuse to talk to me, princess?
Bellamy.
Bellamy hesitated for a minute before sending the message, but ended up sending it anyway. Hopefully she wouldn't chew him out too badly.
12:45
Is what an excuse?
Clarke.
12.47
We both know that you don't just lose things.
Bellamy.
12:49pm
You're right. I just misplace things. Big difference and I understand your
confusion between the two.
Clarke.
12:51pm
Damn.
Bellamy.
12:52pm
Haha. so why aren't you paying attention in class?
Aren't you in biology right now?
Clarke.
12:53pm
Watching a terrible movie. Was gonna take a nap
But texting you seemed like the less boring of the options.
Bellamy.
12:55 pm
I'm flattered. So hey I was thinking we have
a Quiz Bowl practice this weekend. Does that work for you?
Clarke.
12:55 pm
Wouldn't miss it princess.
Bellamy.
"Mr Blake!"
Bellamy's head shot up from the sound of his name being called. His teacher was glaring at him from behind her desk at the front of the room. He also noticed that the kid sitting in front of him had shifted his position at some point and had left Bellamy completely exposed with his phone in hand. Damn it.
"If you don't just pay attention and enjoy the movie, I'll have you take notes." She narrowed her beady eyes at him.
Bellamy made a show of holding up his phone and then dramatically putting it away. No one said anything or giggled at him for being caught. The teacher rolled her eyes and pressed play on the movie again.
Bellamy groaned, setting his head in his folded arms. Maybe he would take that nap after all.
…
Jasper hesitated briefly before walking straight past his fourth hour classroom, ignoring the looks that his classmates gave him as he breezed by.
It was two days after his break-up with Octavia that Jasper skipped class for the first time. It was his fourth period when he asked to use the bathroom in the middle of class, and on his way back to the room he decided that he didn't feel like it.
Jasper remembered how intensely his heart pounded when he snuck away to the auditorium to relax for the last half of class since he knew no one would question him down there. But despite how guilty he felt that first day, he did it again the following day. And the next.
Eventually he stopped going to his fourth hour altogether, and even missed the first half of his fifth. The guilt melted away and instead was an instilled numbness, like he couldn't care less if what he was doing was wrong or a possible disappointment to his family. Alongside Clarke and Monty, he already was a disappointment!
Hell, he couldn't even win over the girl of his dreams after years of pursuing her!
A girl whom Jasper recognized from his class jumped out of his way as he stormed by, catching a glimpse of her intimidated expression. He knew what she was thinking about him; bad news.
Most of his soccer team had caught wind of his drastic behaviour changes and started making any and every excuse to not talk to him whenever he approached them. He supposed he couldn't blame them since it was his own fault for getting labeled as the newest druggy in the school.
It almost made him laugh since most people had him pegged as a drug addict when he hadn't had any intent on trying any kind of drug up until today.
The hallways cleared the closer it came to class starting until finally the bell rang and he was left walking the hallways alone. When he reached the far east staircase, Jasper had to force himself to keep moving. He could see the big, beefed up guys and fish-net stocking girls who frequented this side of the school and suddenly he started to get cold feet.
He was considering to screw it when he recognized Murphy with a joint dangling from the corner of his mouth, eyes bloodshot with an arm wrapped around Emori. The door to the parking lot was propped open with a pair of bookbags, probably to keep the smell of smoke from wafting down the hallways.
Murphy's eyes widened when he noticed Jasper lingering off to the side. Jasper locked his arms behind his back, feeling small for the first time in a while. His hands felt sweaty.
"Just a second guys." Murphy flicked the blunt to one of his buddies, then sauntered over to Jasper. Emori put a hand to her mouth in surprise as she followed behind him. "What are you doing here?" he demanded in a hushed tone, slinging an arm over Jasper's shoulders and spinning him so that his back was to the staircase.
Jasper swallowed cautiously, then hardened his voice. "I'm here because I want some weed."
"Jasper…" Emori's voice was soft. Jasper tried to think of how she knew his name or why she cared for his well-being in the first place.
Murphy chuckled through his teeth. "No you don't," he said, giving Jasper a rough shove towards the hallway.
Jasper fumbled over his ankles. "How would you know?" He whipped around, eyes smoldering. "Besides, it isn't like you to turn down a customer."
Murphy rubbed at the edge of his nose with his thumb, the same dirty smile on his lips. Jasper resisted to growl. "Listen kid," Murphy said, "normally I don't have a conscious when it comes to these types of things, but you also happen to be the brother of Clarke Griffin and I could get into a lot of trouble if she found out about me giving it to you."
Jasper felt like slamming his forehead into the wall. It was just like Clarke to be meddling in his life, even if it was indirectly. "I won't let her find out."
Murphy chuckled again, making Jasper blush. It had sounded stupid even to him, so he could only imagine how stupid it sounded to a guy like Murphy. "Clarke Griffin has methods that not even I don't understand, and I've avoided prison at least six times. I don't need her poking her nose into things that she's kept a blind eye at for so long. Not to mention my buddy Bellamy seems to be aiming for her right now, and it would make me a shitty wingman if I sold any illegal substance to you." Murphy shrugged, then nodded towards the hallway. "If you leave now, I won't tell her you stopped by."
Jasper scrunched up his nose in anger, taking his time to flip off Murphy with both hands before hurrying away from the staircase. A few hoots and hollers from behind him urged him to increase his pace, mostly because he felt embarrassed.
That wasn't how he expected it to go down at all.
Murphy had always been such a mind-his-own-business kind of guy that Jasper hadn't even considered him being a blockade. His biggest concern was being overcharged for his marijuana since he was new to it all, but he had come prepared after snagging two hundred dollar bills from his mom's purse the night before.
How was he going to get a fix now?
"Hey."
Jasper paused midstep. A girl with tangled hair and heavy eye make-up had her back pressed up against a vending machine. He must have missed her during his rage-walking. "What the hell do you want?"
The girl popped a Dum-Dum sucker from one cheek to the other. "Don't get all sassy with me," she replied hotly. It sounded like she had an accent, but he wasn't sure what. "I happened to overhear your conversation and I think I'll be able to help you out."
Jasper's eye twitched, suddenly not so sure about this. On one hand, he was itching to get high to see how it felt, but on the other hand he had only been open to it in the first place since he thought Murphy was going to be his hook-up. This girl didn't seem like the most reliable person out there. "What's your name?"
She smirked. "That's not really important. You have money?"
This time Jasper offered a smirk. "You don't get anything unless I get a name first."
The girl groaned, removing the sucker from her mouth to reveal an empty white stick. "People call me Echo," she said. Her accent was stronger now that there wasn't anything in her mouth but Jasper still couldn't place it. "Happy now?"
"Very." Jasper inhaled slowly as he made up his mind. "Who's your supplier?"
"A higher up over on Azgeda territory. Even I don't know his identity. But what I need to know is if you're hiring me as your hook-up or not."
Jasper stripped one of the hundred-dollar bills from his back pocket. "Is this enough for a trial run?"
Echo grinned, snatching the paper from his hand with her fake nails and ran it along her cheek. "Perfect. I'll bring you your fix after school."
Jasper nodded, barely sparing her another glance as he moved down the hallway. Just over a month ago, he was a rule-abiding honest guy who was on his way to the district soccer match, and now he was skipping class and buying drugs from skanky girls who hung around vending machines.
He kind of wondered how long it was going to last before his family found out about this; there was still time to give it up and go back to the way things used to be.
Still time…
There wasn't still time left as far as his heart was concerned. His time was coming to a close.
...
Raven considered leaving it behind considering she was already halfway through the parking lot, but the thought of someone possibly taking her wrench between now and tomorrow was enough to get her anxiety going.
Turning on her heel, Raven hurried back across the lot, never missing the opportunity to flip the bird at an asshole who honked at her. At least she didn't have to walk to the far side of the school in order to get to the welding room; she had quickly learned to park on the north side of the building for this specific reason after forgetting five tools at school in three days.
She had been doing so well about remembering to!
Raven huffed as she shoved past a few people through the door as they exited. It wasn't really her fault that she had forgotten it, though. She saw Bellamy and in her mad attempt to get out of an approaching awkward situation, Raven tossed things into her bag frantically and got out fast.
Ironically, the one thing she really needed to take home with her hadn't been a part of the frenzy of unnecessary things being randomly shoved into her bag.
The light was still on in the workshop when she reached the door, which struck her as odd. Normally Sinclair, the teacher, would have left by now and Raven had never stumbled across anyone who chose to stay after school to work in the welding room other than her.
Maybe Sinclair had some last minute tests he wanted to run on a design? Raven had been helping him develop a new kind of air purifier recently, so that must be it.
Fully convinced that Sinclair was the only possible person in the room, Raven shoved the door open roughly. "Hey, Sinclair," she said casually, shouldering her bag, "I forgot my wrench and —"
Her eyes settled in on an Asian kid who didn't look much younger than her; probably a junior if she had to guess, if not a senior like herself. Even though she was positive she had never had a conversation with this guy in her life, she somehow had the feeling that she had met him or at least might have interacted with him before. His face seemed familiar.
She was even about to be impressed by the robot-like device he was tinkering with until she noticed that he had her wrench in his hand. "Who are you!?"
Raven's voice came out louder and a bit more angry than she intended, but in a way it seemed fitting. The workshop was her domain where it was her against the world, and for this kid to come invading her personal space was aggravating.
The boy fixed her with an unamused stare, like he had endured enough to where Raven raising her voice just seemed silly. "Monty," he said, looking back down at his robot, "and you're Raven Reyes." Raven stared at him dumbfounded. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have work to do."
Raven clenched her fist around the strap of her purse. She was already annoyed that she had to double back to the workroom only to find that her personal belonging was being used by someone else, but his attitude towards her was taking it to another level. Not to mention he knew her name while she couldn't figure out how she recognized him, which only made things worse.
Raven quirked an eyebrow, set her jaw, and dropped her bag onto the floor near her feet. "I'll leave as soon as you give me my wrench back."
Monty didn't even spare her a glance. "By all means as soon as I'm finished with it."
Raven stomped up the aisle, then slammed her palms down on the table top near his project. "It wasn't left open for a debate because it's my wrench!"
Monty snorted, an incredulous smile starting to form at the corner of his mouth. "You know, you sound just like a little brat that didn't get her way." He shifted slightly, this time meeting her eyes without any hesitations. "Did you stop and think that maybe I'd be more prone to giving it back if you had calmly explained that it was yours and asked for it back nicely? Instead of barging in here and demanding why I have the same right to be in here that you do?"
Once again, Raven was at a loss for words. Even though she didn't want to admit it, this random kid did have a point. The break-up with Finn and the more recent Bellamy situation had set her on edge, and her frustrations had been manifesting in more violent ways, such as lashing out at people over trivial matters like a wrench.
"Here." Monty held the wrench out to her, his eyes daring her to take it and prove him right. When she just stared back at him silently, he shrugged to himself and carried on working. "Changed your mind then, hm?"
His tone was blatantly condescending, which irked her beyond belief, but instead of getting angry she just slid into the seat across from him to watch him work.
It was weird having another person in here with her; sure, there were other kids in the room with her during class in the daytime, but she never chose to work near them. Raven believed that speaking out loud clouded the words that the machines tried to tell her, and because of this she prefered to work away from the others.
Watching Monty was something else, especially since he was clearly an amateaur who happened to be well-informed about machines. A few times she had to stop herself from meddling, but by the fifth time she caught him making a slip up she couldn't contain her annoyance any longer.
"Give me that." Raven reached over the table for the robot and wrench, but Monty slid it out of her grasp.
"Hey," Monty, shifted it again when she made a second attempt to grab it, "what do you think you're doing?"
Raven grunted, just about ready to fling herself across the table and wrestle it from his scrawny arms. "You're stripping the bolts doing it that way! Give it here!"
Monty snorted, but relinquished the machine to Raven who settled it in front of her. "You have to do it like this, otherwise you're going to make it impossible to make any alterations later."
She readjusted the wrench around the nut, and twisted it into place. Monty watched intently, clearly interested in what she was showing him, but every time she glanced at him he would look away. When she finished, she pushed it back across the table. "Now you try."
He groaned, rolling his eyes, but picked up the wrench and mimicked her movements exactly. Raven's eyebrows scrunched together, almost in disbelief of how easily he was able to do it. Most people struggled a little bit at first. Upon further inspection, she also noted that he wasn't as scrawny as she had originally thought either.
Raven hated the silence. It was good at first, but after filling the void with the small argument, Raven felt in need of answers. Why did she feel like she knew him and how did he know her name?
"Have we met before?" She murmured, tapping her fingertips on the table in rhythmic spurts.
Like before, he didn't look up from his tinkering. "Not personally, no."
"How do you know my name, then?"
He temporarily stopped twisting the screwdriver. "First of all, it's a small school. When new kids transfer a month into the school year, news like that spreads like wildfire."
Raven nodded. "Guess that makes sense."
"That and I make it my business to protect Clarke." He returned to his tinkering.
Raven's stomach dropped and her jaw slackened. Suddenly she was ready to take her wrench back, no matter how immature it might be. "Is that how I recognize you?" she snapped. "One of Clarke's lackeys?"
Monty's shoulders stiffened slightly. "Listen, Raven. I don't think you're a bad person, but I need to warn you that Clarke is like a sister to me and I'd do just about anything to support her. At the same time, I know that this whole Two-Timing Finn thing hurts you just as much but you can't keep blaming her for it since it wasn't her fault."
"Well of course you would say that if you're so close!" She fired back. A small gurgle in the back of her throat warned her that if she got too intense, she might just throw up. "She seemed pretty snuggly with him the other day when they were out on a pajama date."
"She didn't take him back. And I doubt she will." Monty traded in the screwdriver for the wrench again. "You heard the rumours about why Clarke and Wells broke up?" Raven nodded. "That was almost fourteen months ago and she's only just starting to forgive him. Even if she does like Finn still, I know Clarke well enough that to be certain that she isn't going to take him back."
Despite the words of encouragement, Raven still felt a little bitter. Monty slid the wrench across the table so that it was setting in front of her.
"Thanks for the wrench."
Raven didn't say a word as he left the room, mostly because she didn't hear him leave. She stayed sitting in the quiet for a long time, wondering why it took such a random outside party to make her think about the things that she had been avoiding the last few weeks.
It was in that workroom where she admitted what she had always known from the very beginning; instead of coming to terms with Finn's betrayal, Raven warranted her anger on Clarke because it was easier to blame a stranger than the person you thought you could trust the most.
…
Clarke tried not to be disappointed by the turn out.
She had explicitly told everyone on student council that today's meeting was important, but twenty minutes had already passed the appointed rendezvous time with only three members present. Despite her efforts of trying to cage her annoyance, she was pretty sure that she wasn't doing a very good job.
"You don't look good." Raven pressed her back up against the counter.
Clarke scoffed slightly, leaning up alongside the counter next to the brunette. She couldn't even remember the last time she had held a civil conversation with her. "If we're going to have any chance to save our school, we have to win that stupid competition," she blew a piece of hair out of her face in frustration, "which we'll never be able to do if no one ever shows up for practices."
Raven pursed her lips and folded her arms. Clarke was pretty sure that that was a clear indication that the conversation was over, but Raven murmured, "You're everyone's golden girl. You'll figure it out."
Clarke shifted slightly. "What's that supposed to mean?"
The faintest form of a smile formed on her face. "Even I know that you're the most reliable person in this entire school, and it doesn't take a genius such as myself to figure that out. I've seen you in action and I know that you can accomplish things when you put your mind to it. This won't be any different." Raven glanced at Clarke briefly, then redirected her attention to the floor.
Clarke smiled softly, then scrunched up her eyebrows in confusion. "Why are you being nice to me when you hate me so much?"
"Look, I don't hate you. Okay?" Raven refused to make eye contact. "I tried too but... it's easier to blame the person you don't know than believe that someone you care about betrayed you."
Clarke's breath hitched in her throat. The comment struck a chord with her, because it reminded her of Wells' betrayal except back then there wasn't someone else she could blame. It was just Wells' fault and it hurt her to accept it. It made her wonder if, given the opportunity, she would have blamed her dad's being fired on someone innocent over Wells to ease her pain.
She shook her head clearing the thought from her head. "I forgive you," she said, touching Raven's shoulder. "It's nice to have you back, Raven."
Raven twitched her nose, wiped a tear from her eye with the back of her hand, then stood up straight like nothing had happened. "It doesn't mean that we're friends now...all of a sudden."
"Certainly not." Clarke laughed, and Raven cracked a grin. It was apparent to Clarke that an unspoken agreement had been reached that ended their bad blood and were officially on the road to becoming friends.
They stood in comfortable silence until their orders were finished and then returned to the others at the table. Clarke slid into the seat beside Bellamy, passing him his coffee and a breakfast burrito.
"What's this?" He glanced down at burrito with his freckled nose all scrunched up in surprise.
Clarke rolled her eyes, feeling like it was obvious. "It's your breakfast. You like sausage right?"
Suddenly she became consciously aware that Finn was watching them from across the table with a raised eyebrow. Bellamy either didn't notice or didn't care because he replied, "Well, yeah, but why did you go out of your way to-"
"You like it. Good. End of story." Clarke could feel the heaviness surrounding the table, especially between Bellamy and Raven for some reason, so she switched gears quickly. "There isn't really enough of us to do an actual practice," she turned to Bellamy, "what do you suggest?"
Bellamy's eyes widened, his mouth full of food. Clarke stifled a laugh as he slapped his burrito on the table a chewed faster. Finn rolled his eyes. "Why don't we just run through some questions?" he asked hotly.
"Because it's no good if it doesn't keep all ten of us sharp." Raven gave him a pointed look like he should know this. "This is a team event and the four of us can't carry the team by ourselves."
"Exactly." Bellamy rolled his tongue over his teeth, then propped his head in his hands. "If we're going to utilize the next hour, we should make a practice schedule and send it out to the rest of the team. Clearly the impromptu practice idea didn't work out too well." He gestured at the four of them for emphasis.
Clarke nodded appreciatively. "Good idea. If we can coordinate better then—"
"Uh oh." Raven's hand shot out and grabbed Clarke's wrist like it was a life-line.
"What is it?" Bellamy started to shift in his seat so he could see what they were talking about, but Finn shook his head.
"Don't turn around," he said.
Clarke felt her heart rate increase. This was not good, and judging by the intense look she shared with Bellamy, he could feel it too. She just hoped he didn't flip a table in the process. "Who is it?"
"Reapers?" Bellamy demanded.
"Worse." Finn's eyes sizzled in anger.
Clarke felt her stomach flip. Worse than the Reapers, huh?
"Clarke Griffin!" A man's voice exclaimed from behind her. "How long has it been?"
Clarke closed her eyes and exhaled loudly before turning toward Cage Wallace and a pair of his dumb friends. Clarke had to give it to Finn, he was right when he said that Mountain Men were worse than Reapers but Cage Wallace was the worst of them all.
"You know this guy?" Bellamy sounded angry but his eyes looked hurt, like she had insulted him somehow.
Clarke frowned, unsure if she was more upset by Bellamy's attitude or the fact Cage Wallace had the audacity to show his face in Delinquent territory. "Unfortunately. This is Cage Wallace, son of the dean over at Mount Weather Prep."
Cage smiled, showing off his row of perfectly white teeth. Clarke hoped he would have left as soon as he saw them, but instead he pulled up a chair to their table, squeaking in between her and Bellamy. For some reason that really bothered her.
"What are you doing on this side of town?" Finn asked coldly, gripping the top rim of his coffee cup.
Cage waved his hand dismissively. "Please. It's not like we're not allowed to go outside our school zones or something."
Clarke shared a look with Raven who looked as uncomfortable as Clarke felt. She watched as Cage's eyes landed on her Quiz Bowl notebook and quickly tried to cover it up with her arm but it was too late. "Ahhh," his lips curled into an impish grin. "So the rumours are true. Honestly I never thought that you would have the balls to join such an ill-equipped team like West Arke's."
It took every ounce of self-control for Clarke to keep herself from smacking him in the jaw. "It wasn't like I had a choice."
"Oh but you did."
"What are you spouting off about?" Bellamy demanded calmly but dangerously.
"Oh you didn't know?" Cage showed off his dumb smile again. "Clarke here was accepted to go to Mount Weather on a scholarship in ninth grade but she turned it down."
Clarke felt embarrassed as three pairs of eyes fell on her. None of them looked angry, which was a relief. Instead they looked...almost impressed that she turned down such a prestigious school. "I wouldn't have fit in with the stuck up pricks who go there."
Cage laughed good naturedly. "I missed that sense of humor. Ever since the whole Wells fiasco, I haven't seen much of you."
Clarke could feel her face going red. "What the hell? How did you know?"
Cage laughed again, looking very gentlemanly despite how bitter his words were. "Stuck up pricks always know the latest gossip. Your and Wells' break-up was the hot topic over at Mount Weather before it even hit the halls of West Arke."
"That's it." Bellamy shoved back his chair, pounded both of his fists on the table, and stood up. "It's time for you to leave."
Cage grinned again. "Or what? You're going to punch me?" Cage's two friends moved behind Bellamy as if to jump him from behind.
"Something like that if you don't leave now," Bellamy snapped.
"Bellamy," Finn stood up slowly, holding a peaceful hand out, "you're making a scene."
"I don't fucking care." Bellamy locked eyes with Cage. "He's mocking my school, my people, my Cla—and Clarke!"
Clarke ignored the last part, considering he probably was caught up with the anaphoras which was what constituted his error. Instead she felt relief when Cage called off his boys and chuckled, "Allons-y."
Clarke nearly sighed a relief when the brat stopped in the doorway on his way out as called out to her, "Mount Weather is going to crush you at tournaments."
Clarke blinked, annoyance and frustration clawing at her neck and shoulders. "Sorry, guys," she said, shoving her notebook and phone into the drawstring bag she had brought. "I'm gonna finish the schedule myself and then we can review it at the next student council meeting."
"Clarke? Are you alright?" Finn touched her shoulder comfortingly, but Clarke jerked away from him violently.
"I'm fine! I just have to go."
Clarke shoved her way through the front of the restaurant then started a brisk walk down the sidewalk outside. She didn't have her car; her mom dropped her off on the way to the hospital. Marcus was going to pick her up in about an hour but she didn't feel like staying in the same place Cage Wallace had been.
He was weird; he gave off a weird vibe that she didn't like and not ever her tough exterior could hide her dislike of him.
A low rumble in the distance made her pause midstep. Great. She forgot that it was going to rain. She figured she wouldn't need an umbrella because she thought that she'd just risk a brief jog to the car but now she was stuck walking.
The first few raindrops started to fall when she recognized Bellamy's beat up car pull up alongside her at the curb. He leaned over the passenger's seat and shoved the door open. "Get in," he said.
Clarke chuckled to herself as she climbed into the now familiar car. It smelled like him, she noted as she closed the door. Earthy. She liked it. "Thanks for the ride."
"Don't mention it."
Clarke smiled to herself, finally feeling relaxed in Bellamy's car as they listened to old music and the rain torpedoing into the windshield. She really should have kept her eyes closed because then she wouldn't have spotted them in the rain.
"Bellamy? You might wanna see this."
Bellamy peered out her side of the windshield. "Oh fuck no."
...
7/17/17
