Craig

Craig should never have grabbed the thermos. He knew this the moment his fingers closed around the slightly warm metal. It was stupid, he was stupid for doing it, but it had been close to the edge and Craig had suddenly been struck with this intense realization that if he didn't grab it, it would fall to the floor and Tweek would look like a fool as he scrambled to pick it up.

He just didn't want it to look like he was going to fight a total wimp.

That was it, he told himself as he leaned against the lockers and stared at the thermos in his fingers. That was the only reason he'd done what he'd done. It didn't have anything to do with the fact that he was upset with Kyle for taking Tweek's coffee away. That was just a fact of life, nothing to lose his mind over. And he didn't feel guilty because it didn't matter that Tweek had looked at him with heartbreak when he'd grabbed the container of coffee like he'd just crushed his spirits, Craig didn't care about the boy.

It didn't matter how much he regretted this whole fiasco, he didn't care at all. I don't care, he repeated to himself, eyes trailing back towards the cafeteria, from which the sounds of fighting could be still heard. It's just Tweek, I don't care.

Suddenly, the sound got quite a bit louder as a flash of blond and green flew through the door and slammed it shut behind it. As the thing slowed down, Craig instantly recognized Tweek's soft whimpers, the way he shivered as he pressed his spine against the door he'd just exited. A million things flashed through Craig's head, including how fucking wide those green eyes really were.

But he banished those thoughts quickly, needing a clear head for this. In his usual flat tone, Craig simply called out, "Hey Tweek."

He didn't even know what he was supposed to say to the boy, he just knew he had to say something. It was like his mouth wouldn't give him another option. Just like last night, Craig realized that there were moments where thinking just wasn't an option, sometimes, he just had to speak.

At once, Tweek let out a scream. "GOD! FUCK! AHHHGH!" As if deafened by his own shouts, Tweek covered his ears quickly and sank to the ground, drawing his knees to his chest and huddling up in fear. Craig hated that he could produce this reaction from Tweek so easily, but he pushed that thought out of his head as well. He should be scared of me, I'm a monster. I'm going to fight him when I literally have no reason to.

The thought made his head feel clouded.

So he pushed himself away from the wall and slowly walked over to the shivering and twitchy blond. As he drew closer, Tweek's eyes traveled up towards his face, almost like he was waiting for something bad to happen. But when their eyes met, the look of wonder in those green orbs was overwhelming.

Forcing himself to ignore it, Craig tugged the edge of his hat down before stopping in front of Tweek. Is he thinking about whether I want to hurt him or not? He hoped not, but he knew that it was probably a lost cause at this point. But he couldn't stop watching the boy, unable to make up his mind at all. Everything, the resolve he'd built up and the resignation for what was to come melted away, leaving him confused, unable to think.

For a moment, he thought that Tweek might say something, tell him that he didn't want to fight, that they should call the whole thing off. He'd seen it in the boy's eyes just minutes before, that he wasn't ready for this any more than Craig was. But Tweek just twitched and stayed silent, too frightened probably to speak.

Sighing softly, just a small escaping puff of air, Craig hefted the thermos. "Here." Resisting the urge to just hand the damn thing to Tweek, the Noirette tossed the container to the boy. Quickly, Tweek's hands shot out and he caught the thermos. As if just the presence of coffee calmed him, Tweek stopped twitching quite so violently, instead staring up at Craig as if he could hardly believe his eyes.

Needing to explain himself, though he'd never felt that desire before, Craig said, "They were about to knock it off the table, it would have fallen." Why the hell am I explaining myself to him, I did nothing wrong. Snapping his mouth shut, Craig just kept staring at Tweek, trying to wonder why this was so different, why the blond was so different.

As if he half expected someone to take it away from him, Tweek fumbled the lid open at once and quickly gulped down the coffee inside, his entire body relaxing as the caffeine, or at least the idea of the caffeine hit his system. Craig just watched, unable to do anything else. Lowering the thermos, Tweek looked back into his eyes and said, in a slightly breathless voice, "Thanks."

For a moment, Craig wanted to say something more. Why are we doing this? He wanted to ask. Why are we letting them control what we're doing? Why do I want to hurt Cartman for what he did to you? How do I get you out of my head?

When did I let you make such a mess of things?

It felt like the revelation he'd been waiting for was on the tip of his tongue but he couldn't quite make it translate into words. He just watched Tweek and thought, insofar as he could, that when the blond stared at him like that, Craig felt small.

Hey Tweek, I don't think I'm going to fight you today.

And it was like his entire perception of his world shattered. Shaking himself from the trance he'd fallen into, Craig flipped Tweek off, though there was no anger behind the action. "See you this afternoon," he said simply, before stuffing his hands in his pockets and walking away, leaving Tweek huddled up on the floor.

The moment he turned a corner, Craig paused and stared at the ground, his mind in chaos. Gritting his teeth suddenly, the boy slammed his fist into the locker beside him, the resulting clang echoing through the halls. Breathing heavily he just stood there, his eyes shut tight.

What's wrong with me?

))))-((((

"Aw man, this is going to be sweet," Cartman said, looking way too excited about the whole thing. Craig stood next to him, his hands in his pockets, his eyes trained on the ground. He'd only just gotten back here, and there had already been a crowd of people waiting for him. Everyone in the grade had turned out for the fight and it seemed that it was a pretty even split between who thought he'd win and who thought Tweek would win.

None of them knew that Craig wasn't going to fight. It was probably for the best, he might actually end up fighting Cartman if they knew.

That morning, he'd been sure he was going to fight Tweek. Get it over with quickly, that had been his whole plan. One punch to put him on the ground, the second strike to make him see stars. By the third hit, Tweek would be out cold, the fourth would be just to make it believable. It would all be over and someone would take Tweek to the hospital and Craig would be there when the boy woke up so he could apologize.

He didn't care, but Tweek was still different, so he'd be there and he'd accept the fact that he'd ruined any chance of him and Tweek ever getting along. That had been his plan and it had been a rather good one in his eyes.

But then at recess, it had all gone to shit. Now he couldn't even fight Tweek at all. Craig wasn't sure what was going to happen because of it, but at least he could be sure that Tweek wouldn't end up with another bruise because of him.

The only way he might fight Tweek was if Tweek was ready and willing to fight him, but he knew that was a lost cause, there had been too much fear in Tweek's eyes for that to happen. It's all just a show, we're nothing but pawns for Cartman and his gang.

"You are going to kick Tweek's ass," Cartman announced, looking up at Craig with that shit-eating grin.

Turning his flat expression on Cartman, Craig was silent for just long enough to dim that smile on the boy's face before saying, "Probably." The word brought back Cartman's smile in an instant. Goddamnit, I hate this, I hate him. It was so tempting to just turn on the fatass and slug him, put him on the ground and beat the shit out of him instead of hurting Tweek.

But he didn't, he just stood there.

I really need to figure out this shit with Tweek. He didn't want to think about it too hard, it left him feeling like the world had been turned on its head, but if he didn't, Craig worried that he'd be an emotional mess forever. That would be unpleasant and he'd rather not have to handle that. That being said, the moments before the supposed fight between him and Tweek was probably not the time to be thinking about it.

As if thinking about the boy summoned him, a group of people entered the playground yard, Stan and Kyle leading it, flanking a frankly nervous looking Tweek. Craig didn't blame him. He found himself taking his hands out of his pockets, unable to keep completely still. As they got closer, Craig could hear what Stan was saying. "Stay pissed, Tweek. Stay pissed."

As they drew level with Cartman's group, both groups drew back a little, walking around them and forming a crowd to the side, as if giving Tweek and Craig room. It left them standing there alone, staring at each other. Craig looked down into Tweek's eyes, his expression as flat as ever. Tweek twitched to the side, that nervous tilt of his mouth remaining unchanged.

I'm not going to hit you, Craig couldn't help but think, wondering if Tweek could possibly understand his thoughts just through his eyes. I'm not going to hurt you, not when you don't want to hurt me. Because Tweek wasn't raising his fist in anger, and Craig didn't dare move, for fear of setting the twitching boy off.

"Alright, here we go," Stan said, standing beside Cartman and staring at Tweek and Craig. Craig could feel the eyes of the rest of the grade on him, but he didn't react to it. Miraculously, Tweek didn't either. Craig wondered if he was imagining the understanding that passed through those green eyes, had to wonder if it was simply wishful thinking. I don't want to do this, I don't want to fight you when I don't have any reason to.

"Time for you to get proven wrong, fat boy," Kyle was saying, his voice somehow sounding distant. All Craig could hear were the involuntary sounds coming out of Tweek's mouth, that and his own ragged breathing.

"You're gonna be eating those words, asshole," Cartman shot back, sounding excited. Craig could feel the collective anticipation of everyone watching them, why had this turned into such a spectacle? Tweek blinked jerkily, first one eye then the other as if his brain couldn't quite decide what to do.

"No I won't," Kyle said. "Because you'd eat 'em first, tubby." That bruise was still there, that fucking purple mark that reminded Craig who the real enemy was. It wasn't Tweek, it would never be the blond. It would only ever be the people who hurt him because it was easy and because it was fun. Once I hit him, that makes me no better than any of them.

So he didn't, he just blinked passively at Tweek and slipped his hands back into his pockets. Tweek's eyes widened minutely as if they weren't already as wide as dinner plates, but he didn't speak.

"Well?" Stan asked, sounding frustrated with the lack of action. Tweek jumped slightly at that as if he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do. Craig could almost see the pressure building up in him, but Tweek didn't scream, he just looked towards Craig as if waiting.

Watching him steadily, Craig did something that he'd never really done before, not in living memory. Secretively, so the rest of the gathered crowd couldn't see, Craig twitched the side of his mouth up in the barest memory of a smile.

Maybe Tweek didn't catch it, but Craig finally knew what he was going to do. Fuck, this is going to take a miracle to pull off.

"Come on!" Cartman insisted, his tone whiny. Craig didn't react to it, he didn't need to. He just watched Tweek with that tiny smile and thought, trust me. Trust me to know what I'm doing. Maybe he couldn't get out of this fight, maybe he could, but Craig knew for certain that he wasn't going to fight Tweek today.

"Yeah, if you're gonna do it, do it!" At the sound of Wendy's voice, Craig dropped his expression back to his perfect deadpan and slowly revolved to face the crowd, finally looking away from Tweek. Well, here goes nothing.

"What do we do?"

You could have heard a pin drop.

Stan was the first to speak. "Huh?" Because of course everyone there knew that what Craig had just said was ridiculous. Everyone knew what you did in a fight, Craig especially. But at that moment, Craig felt like he'd done the right thing. Fuck all of them, fuck anyone who wants me to fight Tweek, I'll do what I want.

"What do you mean, 'what do you do?'," Cartman asked, tilting his head in confusion as if Craig had spoken in a foreign language. His confusion was mirrored by the rest of the people gathered. "You just fight each other!"

As if he was catching on to what Craig was trying to do, Tweek whipped around and asked, "How!?" Craig almost almost wanted to snort with laughter. Probably, Tweek really didn't know how to fight and the looks of horror on Kyle's and Stan's faces were priceless. Never even thought of that before dragging us together to fight, did you?

"How?" Kyle asked in a strangled voice, a look of disbelief on his face. His eyes kept flicking between Craig and Tweek as if waiting for the other shoe to drop. So Craig decided that if they were going to bullshit this whole thing, he might as well go for broke.

"I've never been in a fight before," he lied, in a completely serious tone. It was at this point that a choked sound escaped from Tweek that sounded suspiciously like a laugh. Oh my god, we're actually doing this. There's no way that they're buying a word I'm saying but fuck it, I think I just made Tweek laugh.

"Me neither," Tweek managed, once he'd gotten control of his own vocal chords. Craig had to resist the urge to look at the boy, because for someone who couldn't handle pressure, Tweek was doing a marvelous job.

At Tweek's proclamation, the gathered children instantly let out cries of disgust and anger. It was obvious that no one believed either of them but it didn't matter, Tweek and he weren't fighting. For now, they were fine.

Over the jeering of the crowd, Stan called, "Aw dude, come on! That's bullshit!" He looked so annoyed that Craig and Tweek were defying him and it was just so satisfying to see. I might not have won the war, but I definitely beat them this time. Really, he shouldn't feel so damn good about something like this.

The best part was that Tweek let out another one of those strangled giggles. It could have been mistaken as one of his usual spastic noises, but Craig could hear the difference and it made him feel even more defiant.

"Yeah," Cartman agreed, sounding exasperated. "You just hit each other! Smack each other around." Turning back to Tweek, Craig narrowed his eyes ever so slightly, as if goading Tweek into doing it. Eyes wide, yet full of laughter and relief, Tweek stepped forward and reached up so he could shove Craig back an inch. Without any real force behind it, Craig slapped Tweek's face in return, careful to avoid the bruise on his cheek.

Kyle let out an annoyed sigh. "Not like that!"

Face twisting into a look of worry, as if only just realizing that there really were other people watching them, Tweek twisted his head to face the crowd and squeaked out, "Like what then?" Craig felt his stomach twist to see the return of that genuine nervousness in Tweek, but he assumed it was inevitable and didn't fight it.

With a groan, Stan stormed over to them, fire in his eyes. "All right, all right, screw it!" Tweek jumped away as Stan got between them. Glaring at Craig as if to say I know what you're doing, he turned to Tweek and gave him a look that made the blond cringe back in fear. "We have to postpone the fight 'til Tweek and Craig can learn how to fight." The sarcasm was clear, but Craig couldn't have cared less if he tried.

With groans of annoyance, the crowd dispersed, all tired of waiting around for a fight that wasn't going to happen yet. Most of them left, Kenny walked up beside Cartman and stayed there, seemingly content to watch the shitshow. Craig knew that this was just postponing the inevitable, but at least it would give Tweek a better chance to get ready. And maybe he'd figure out a way out of it for good. He could only hope.

Turning to Tweek, Stan crossed his arms and said, "All right, Tweek, we'll teach you how to fight." Tweek squeaked at that, glancing over Stan's shoulder at Craig as if looking for back up. All Craig did was raise an eyebrow as if to ask, Well, are you going to roll over or are you going to fight? Tweek shivered, but he didn't look quite so uncertain.

Pointing at Cartman, Stan said, "And Cartman, you teach Craig." Craig fought not to roll his eyes. As if the fatass could teach him anything. Actually, if they fought, more than likely Craig would end up hurting Cartman. He couldn't say he wouldn't enjoy it.

As if realizing this himself, Cartman quickly said, "I don't think that's very fair. If I teach Craig, he's gonna really kill Tweek." Another quick glance towards Tweek to find him staring at him. Craig knew what was running through the blonde's mind, could see in on his face. He knew what that look was. He believes Cartman, doesn't he? He can't help himself. That, beyond all of the other shit that had happened, made Craig feel defeated and frustrated.

No matter what I do, it's like he just has to believe I hate him. What am I supposed to do? I've been nothing but supportive of him and this is what I get in response. Once again that irrational frustration welled up within him. He just wanted Tweek to stop looking at him like he was a monster. That was it! He thinks I want to kill him, but I don't! I don't want to hurt him at all!

His hands clenched into fists, and suddenly, Tweek's eyes widened in fear and he looked away from Craig, his intense twitching returning. Fuck him, Craig thought savagely, even though it made him feel miserable. Fuck Tweek Tweak and his twitching and his paranoia. Fuck him!

Meanwhile, Stan and Cartman continued to argue, as if anyone even gave a shit. "Oh yeah? Well, I'm gonna have my uncle Jimbo teach Tweek how to box!" Kyle moved to stand beside Stan and crossed his arms, nodding in agreement. Forcing himself to focus on them instead on Tweek, Craig frowned, trying to picture the blond boxing.

"Ooooh!" Cartman mocked, waving his hands around. "Boxing's scary you guys!" Then his glare returned and he shot back, "I'm gonna have Craig learn martial arts!" Oh joy, I'm just going to love this. Well, he'd gotten himself into this, Craig figured that he'd just have to deal with the consequences. Bitterly, he thought, I should have just punched Tweek when I had the chance. It's not like I would have changed his opinion of me at all anyway.

"Fine!" Stan snapped, his hands clenched into fists. "We'll see you back here tomorrow!" Nudging Kyle slightly, he turned around, leading Tweek after him.

"Fine!" Cartman called back, still not moving, just glaring at them. From beside him, Kenny rolled his eyes and snorted.

"Fine!" Kyle called back, finally following Stan and falling into step beside him.

"Fine, that's fine!" Cartman called after their retreating figures before rumbling in disgust. Kenny, on the other hand, just laughed.

"You guys are the best," he said, before ambling away. Slapping Craig on the back, the blond said to the taller boy, "Go on boy, give Tweek hell tomorrow." Then he was gone, leaving Craig even tenser than he'd been before.

Waiting for a moment, as if letting Kenny get out of earshot, Cartman finally let out a growl and turned on Craig. Shoving him, the shorter boy snapped, "Craig, why the hell did you do that?"

"Do what?" Craig asked, forcing himself not to fight back. He simply towered over Cartman, his sheer height doing all the work he needed it to do. Uncertainly, Cartman took a step back but didn't change his expression.

"You know what!" Fiercely, Cartman said, "I know for a fact that you get into all kinds of fights, why didn't you just beat him then! You could have totally whipped his ass!"

Coolly, Craig leaned back on his heels and said, "It wouldn't have been a fair fight. If I'm going to beat him, I want it to be fair."

"That's never stopped you before!" Cartman insisted, crossing his arms. "This is bullshit Craig, you did that on purpose, you want to lose on purpose, don't you?!" Getting closer, Cartman sneered, "What, you gonna kiss Tweek's sweet ass? Is that what you are? A fag, just like him?"

Drawing in a sharp breath through his nose, Craig fought the bubbling in his blood that demanded he slug Cartman right there. How dare he suggest that? How dare he suggest that I'm gay!? I don't even care about Tweek! "No," Craig said, softly instead of shouting like he wanted to. "I'm not. I'm going to fight him. I hate him."

Seemingly content with this, Cartman took a step back and huffed in approval. "That's what I thought."

And the worst part was, Craig wasn't even sure if he was lying anymore.