A/N: Okay, I feel there has been some slight confusion as to what events I'm going to be covering in this story. Because of the timeline I'm attempting to create, I won't be able to do everything. There will not be, for example, anything about Tweek's brief stint as part of Cartman's gang, nor will there be anything from the episodes surrounding and including Weiners Out. I wish I could fit them in but I just can't find a good place for them.

As I have yet to fully finish watching every season of South Park, I can't definitively say I won't add in some other smaller episodes where Tweek and Craig had bit roles, or whether I'm going to add in anything from the mobile game. I can say with complete certainty however that I will be covering the rest of The Stick of Truth plotline, with my own twists to make up for the fact that the new kid is not part of the story yet. I'll also be covering Tweek x Craig, The Fractured but Whole, Put It Down, and a modified look at the Crystal Meth coffee fiasco. After that, it's all up in the air and will likely be an entirely original plot from that point.

I know that was a lot to read, but I hope it cleared some confusion up!

Enjoy.

Craig

Tweek was still shivering.

Why did I have to convince him to take his fucking shirt off? Craig was trying to pay attention to what Token was saying, but the boy huddled up against his side was very distracting. He was painfully aware of the way Tweek's bony hip knocked against his leg and of the way he kept twitching, despite having calmed down. His shoulder felt thin under Craig's hand, small and fragile, and his skin was warm to the touch, despite the chill.

Usually, he didn't pay this much attention to Tweek, but he was right now. This was probably because he felt mostly responsible for the blonde's current state.

He'd been the one, after all, to convince him that taking his shirt off would make him look more like a barbarian. Then Craig had allowed Tweek to trail behind even though he'd known the boy was already nervous and then the boy had almost face planted on the sidewalk. Picturing Tweek covered in bleeding scrapes was enough to make Craig's insides clench.

So now he was left to curse himself silently, no idea how he was supposed to make the situation better. Part of him felt better, having the blond right under his proverbial wing, exactly where he could best look after the shorter boy. The rest of him knew that while he gave no fucks about letting Tweek wrap himself up in his cape, everyone else was going to care. I just don't want him to look like a target.

Because that's what he looked like, with those wide green eyes and that open expression that held fuck all back. Tweek always looked like a target, something that needed to be shielded, for fear of finding him run over. Craig knew better than anyone just how tough the boy could be when the need arose, but when he wasn't fighting for his life, Tweek just didn't fight period. Though part of Craig knew that he probably was helping encourage this pacifistic nature, the rest of him didn't really care.

Fuck it, Craig thought savagely, pushing down the worry clouding his mind. Let them think he's a target, I'll fuck up anyone who tries to so much as touch him! Tweek's free hand grasped at his shirt and Craig could feel some of his irrational anger settling down. No, it was all going to be fine. He was just keeping Tweek from falling down again and really, the blond looked fucking bad ass with war paint streaked across his body. This had been a good idea.

Turning the corner, careful to keep from running over Tweek's feet, Craig looked down Cartman's block warily. He wasn't sure what he was looking for, but the sight of Clyde running full tilt towards them was certainly among the most welcome of those things. "CRAIG!" the boy exclaimed, holding onto his helmet as he ran, his sword flailing about dangerously. "TOKEN! TWEEK! YOU'RE ALL HERE!"

Raising his eyebrows, Token let out a soft chuckle at Clyde's excitement and deftly intercepted the boy's attempt to hug Craig. Patting the boy on the back, Token said, "Okay Clyde, don't make an ass of yourself." Instantly whimpering, Clyde gave Token a hurt look before it quickly turned into a slack-jawed expression.

"Oh my god, you look so cool!" Clyde exclaimed. Token just stood there calmly, allowing the boy to excitedly ogle his costume. Eyes flickering to Craig, Clyde practically bounced on the balls of his feet. "Craig, your costume is so perfect~" he half-whispered as he looked the Noirette up and down as well. Turning to the twitching blond still huddled up under Craig's cape, Clyde pried the brown material from Tweek's fingers, eliciting a squeak from the boy.

"Teacup," Clyde chuckled, pulling the boy out from under Craig's protective arm, much to Tweek's alarm. The blond swung his head around to shoot Craig a pathetic and pleading look, but against the exuberant brunette, it was no use. "You look bad-ass! Like a real barbarian!" Laughing at Tweek's embarrassed sounds, Clyde grinned at Craig. "You ready to do this dude? There is no way Cartman will be able to say no to you guys!"

Pushing away the urge to pull Tweek closer, back to safety, Craig nodded. "We're here, aren't we?" Allowing Tweek to be dragged away by Clyde, who had really grown to adore the blond over the last weeks, Craig fell in step beside Token, who watched the two of them walk away with a calculating expression. "What's up dude?" Craig asked, his voice flat as always.

As Tweek let out a shriek and scampered away from Clyde, who laughed and jabbed at him with his sword playfully, Token let out an hmm. "You're letting him near Cartman," he commented softly, his tone one of simple observation as opposed to accusation as it might have been. Furrowing his brows at the words, Craig turned towards the black boy, trying to figure out what Token's angle was.

"What did you expect me to do?" he muttered, at last, crossing his arms in absence of having pockets to shove his hands into. Considering how genuinely happy Tweek looked at that moment, Craig couldn't understand why Cartman would factor into the equation at all.

"Join the other team," Token said bluntly, glancing at Craig evenly. "Yet you're willingly putting Tweek in Cartman's way, regardless of what's happened." The way he said it, it might have sounded like a statement, but Craig felt like it was an accusation. Join the other team? When Clyde is already part of the humans? What the fuck?! He wasn't even sure what he was supposed to say in response to that.

So instead he took issue with a different matter. "I don't put Tweek anywhere, he's not mine," Craig said, narrowing his eyes slightly. "He chose to be a part of this." That's how it had happened, right? He'd been so careful not to push Tweek in any direction, despite his own desire to join the game.

Token looked at Craig for a moment as if he couldn't believe the Noirette had just said what he'd said, before humming again and turning away. Feeling very much like he was facing the inquisition, Craig snapped, "What?" frustrated with Token's mysteriousness.

Instead of giving him any useful information, Token just said, "You can't protect him here, Craig." That made Craig clench his fists. What the fuck is that supposed to mean? It was especially frustrating because of course, he was going to protect Tweek from people like Cartman and Kenny who were only there to torment the blond. What was Token trying to say, just telling Craig he couldn't protect Tweek?

Probably picking up on Craig's growing annoyance, Token sighed. "You were the one who chose to do this Craig, don't tell me otherwise. Part of the reason he's here at all is because he wants to please you, whether he knows it or not." There was no mystery as to who the he was referring to. "So I'm just warning you that you can't catch him every time he trips and falls."

"Tweek can take care of himself," Craig bit out, his anger starting to come out in his voice. Token glanced over at him before letting his eyes travel to Tweek, who was trying to escape Clyde ruffling his hair. Frustrated with the black boy, even though he couldn't possibly know what Token was trying to say, Craig said, "Look, he's fine."

But all Token did was hum under his breath and keep walking, the conversation apparently, in his mind, already over. It left Craig feeling frustrated and confused. He's right though, isn't he? Craig had been protecting the blond recently, however subconscious the actions had been. Except he couldn't think of what could possibly be wrong with him doing that. Tweek was small and let people walk all over him. Craig was big and intimidating and didn't take shit from anyone. It made sense that he'd sort of watch over the shorter boy and keep him from getting hurt.

Just because they were going to be around Cartman didn't mean any of that had to change. Sure the fatass would probably make fun of Tweek and inevitably Craig as well but so what? He'd do that anyway, the least Craig could do would be to keep Tweek from getting too hurt by the whole thing. Recalling Tweek the night before, kneeling on his chest, his eyes wild and happy, Craig reflected that he might not even have to do that because what he'd said had been absolutely true. Tweek could handle himself.

He'd handled himself for years before Craig had even been a thought in his life. Token was worrying about nothing.

"Oh god, are you sure about this?" Tweek's voice brought Craig out of his moody musings. Looking over at the blond, Craig followed his eyes.

Waving at the banner stretched over the fence beside Cartman's house that proudly proclaimed Kupa Keep, Clyde said, "Come on Tweek, the Grand Wizard King might have the reputation of a douche, but he's pretty good about letting anyone join who wants to. You'll do fine!" Drawing level with them, Craig noticed Tweek's increased twitching and started to reach out a hand to pat the boy's head before drawing it back, remembering what Token had said. Fuck.

"Well, I'd suggest we get this over with if we're going to do it at all," Token said reasonably, looking between the other three. Tweek let out a squeak, Clyde grinned excitedly and Craig just huffed out a breath and stared straight ahead. "Clyde, you know the way."

"Yep!" Quickly making an effort to compose himself, the cheerful brunette put on a serious face and beckoned them forward. "We just go through Cartman's house," he told them, opening the front door and ushering them through. "Everyone does it the first time." Tipping his chin up, Craig led the way, confidently walking through Cartman's house without batting an eye. He felt a hand tugging on his cloak but didn't react.

He's fine. I'm not going to let anything hurt him for real.

When they reached the back door, they were met with the smiling face of Butters, who brightened at the sight of Clyde. "Well heya gentlemen, y'here t'see the Grand Wizard?" The shorter boy had traded his usual clothes for a blue tunic, navy cape and a jeweled band around his forehead. When he smiled up at Craig happily, the Noirette only gave him a flat look in return.

Stepping forward, Clyde announced, "Yes indeed Paladin Butters, these men have come to join the warriors of Kupa Keep and must see the King at once!" From behind him, Tweek let go of his cape.

"Well, I-I'm sure the Grand Wizard would love t'see you!" Free hand resting on the hammer secured in his belt while the other held open the back door, Butters stood at attention and announced, "You may pass, noble warrior!" Nodding to Butters, Clyde led them into the kingdom of Kupa Keep.

Instantly, Craig could feel himself growing excited. It was exactly what Clyde had been describing. The weapons shop, the stables, and behind it all, the castle, with its plywood towers and flimsy drawbridge. To Craig though, it looked amazing. Did Cartman really come up with all this? Following Clyde, Craig passed by the other warriors, all of them kids he recognized from school. Some of them waved, identifying them as new recruits. Most though continued to go about their business, training with the array of weapons available and enacting other bits of roleplay that Craig wished he could join.

"Very nice setup," Token commented from behind Craig, his tone appreciative. "I'm impressed Clyde, this is pretty cool."

"Jesus, are those real axes?" Tweek squeaked, his voice high and scared. "Oh god, that's so dangerous!" Glancing over his shoulder, Craig fixed Tweek with a look that he hoped would calm the boy down. Locking eyes with him, Tweek drew himself up to his full height and lifted his chin, as if trying to prove to Craig that he was okay.

Stopping at the base of the drawbridge, Clyde called up to one of the boys stationed at the top of a plywood tower, "I have three new recruits that the Grand Wizard is expecting!" Nodding, the boy scrambled down. After a moment of waiting that was rife with anticipation, a voice emanated from within the castle's entrance.

"You have my attention, proceed." At the sound of Cartman's voice, Craig's attention shifted to Tweek, but the boy wasn't paying attention. He was standing straight, his twitching reduced only to a tremble. His eyes were fixed forward and by the set of his jaw, Craig knew the boy was as ready as he'd ever be. It's now or never. Following Clyde, Craig stepped into the castle.

The room was lit from the ceiling, and the light cast most of the area into shadows. On one side, there was a table with little pebbles and old chess pieces on it, with a hand-drawn map with red lines crisscrossing it hanging above it. Craig assumed together, they were a strategy board. The other side was taken up by a pedestal with a pillow on it. Resting on this stand was a stick that was illuminated by a separate light. The stick of truth, Craig realized.

But what was the main focus was the throne in the middle of the room. With torches on either side of it, the thing was massive and ornate. On it sat Cartman, dressed in magenta robes and a dark cape, the boy held a polished piece of wood that served as a staff. On his head, a blue wizard's hat completed his image. Craig had to admit, he looked every bit the grand wizard.

"Ah, yes Clyde, you have brought the men that would join our cause." Even the boy's usual whine had been replaced by a dramatic drawl. Drawing level with him, the two boys that had been behind Craig stood to either side of him, Tweek on his left, Token on his right. "Is that right Clyde, they wish to be warriors for Kupa Keep?"

"Yes, Grand Wizard," Clyde said, dropping into a bow of sorts. Craig felt his gut turn, but he too bowed stiffly, unsure what else he was supposed to do. "Craig, Token and Tweek have come to fight against the Drow Elves in the battle for Zaron."

From beside Cartman, in a lower, smaller hair, Kenny, or Princess Kenny as he was apparently going by now, giggled girlishly. He was still wearing his orange parka, but over it, the boy had donned a pink and purple dress, in addition to a golden wig with long fancy looking braids. Craig fought not to roll his eyes. Instead, he simply straightened and stared straight ahead at Cartman.

"Well gentlemen," Cartman said, sitting up straighter on his throne. "This is the Kingdom of Kupa Keep. The KKK for short. We represent the humans of the land of Zaron, and our only quarrel is with the Drow Elves and their High Jew Elf Lord, Kyle. Now you wish to join us, you wish to become cool." Cartman's eyes traveled over each of them in turn. First over Token, then over Craig, then finally to Tweek. Craig didn't like the light in Cartman's eyes as he looked the lightly shaking boy up and down.

"That is right." Stepping forward, taking the initiative, Token stood before Cartman proudly. With his jaw set, the black boy announced, "We are here because we felt that we might be of service to you, oh Grand Wizard." Craig nodded once in affirmation, while Tweek just let out a squeak.

"Oh, you do now?" Cartman questioned, leaning forward. "What do you think about that, Lady McCormick? These men think that they can help us when we have the stick and the power of the universe in our hands." His eyes fixed on Craig, and the smile he gave was nothing short of malicious. "Funny that they should choose now to join, almost like they wanted to pick what was clearly the winning side."

Unable to put up with much more of Cartman's patronizing attitude, Craig stepped forward and bluntly said, in his usual monotone, "If I may, you aren't exactly the winning side, oh Grand Wizard." Instantly, Cartman's eyes narrowed at him. Hardly intimidated, Craig said, "You are losing people, your strategies are bad, and yeah, I think we can help."

"And what are you supposed to be, Craig?" Cartman sneered. "Who are you to tell me what my kingdom does and doesn't need."

"I want to join as a thief," Craig told Cartman, narrowing his own eyes but in no other way attempting to be threatening. "You need someone with stealth, I'll be that person."

Cartman started to open his mouth, clearly getting pissed, but Kenny cut him off. "No no," Kenny tittered, waving a gloved hand. Behind the makeup he was wearing, the boy looked delighted. "I want to hear more. Let Fucker's- I mean, let Tucker's friends tell us what they are."

Crossing his arms with a huff, Cartman sat back on his throne and said, "Ugh, very well, go on. What are the rest of you supposed to be?"

Expression still neutral, despite Craig's overstepping of the line after being expressly told not to, Token nodded his head and said, "I would be a Cleric, Grand Wizard." At the word, Cartman's eyes narrowed once more, but it was a more calculating expression than before. "You don't have any good healers currently, I could fill that gap and bring a lot of your wounded soldiers back into battle."

"That's actually useful," Cartman mused, nodding as if impressed. "What do you think Lady McCormick, should we let Token Black into the KKK?"

"I think he'd be valuable," Kenny said at once, lacing his fingers under his chin and leaning forward in his chair. "They have a point Cartman, you aren't exactly careful when it comes to strategy. I have a feeling that getting a Cleric would change how things are headed."

"Well, yes, I guess you have a point," Cartman grumbled, clearly not happy about being called out on his poor strategies. "I suppose Token could join. But what about you?" He faced Tweek, who yelped before forcing himself to straighten again and stand tall. "What are you supposed to be?"

"I'm a Barbarian!" Tweek said in a rush, twitching hard to one side. "B-because you need someone to defeat the Elven Rangers and –ngh- I could do that!" Craig couldn't help but glare at Cartman as the boy grinned, his expression positively maniacal. Tweek shivered under it and Craig had to resist drawing attention to himself in an attempt to divert it away from Tweek.

"He's such an adorable barbarian, I want to keep him!" Kenny announced suddenly, slipping off of his throne and all but floating over to the shorter blond. "Just look at him Cartman, he's so cute." It sounded so mocking and derisive, but Craig didn't dare do anything. Looping a satin covered arm around Tweek's shoulder, the Princess cooed, "Let him join, pleeeeaaase~?"

With a great sigh, as if it were a hard decision, Cartman said, "Very well. For you, Lady McCormick, I'll let Tweek join." Looking at them once more, Cartman's eyes narrowed again at Craig. "Clyde, Princess Kenny," he said, his gaze unwavering. "Why don't you show our new recruits around, get them outfitted with some proper weapons. I… Require a private word with..." He waved a hand about before settling on, "Feldspar. Feldspar the Thief."

Nodding at once, Clyde bowed again and said, "Of course, oh Grand Wizard. We will do as you ask." Pulling Token out of the castle, Clyde instantly started chattering away to the black boy.

With a laugh, Kenny pulled Tweek away, "Come on Tweekers, let's see if we can't make you a more terrifying Barbarian than you already are!" As the boy was being dragged from the castle, he shot Craig a wide-eyed look. Though he didn't feel at all certain about what was about to happen, Craig gave him a placid look. I'm going to be fine Tweek, you got in, you're okay.

As if he could read Craig's mind, the boy swallowed and allowed himself to be pulled from the room.

The moment they were alone, Cartman hefted himself off of his throne. Leaning on his staff, the boy walked forward, his narrowed eyes replaced with a conniving smirk. "Now Craig- Feldspar, you want to join, don't you?"

"Yes," Craig said stiffly, looking down at the shorter boy. With the hat, he almost looked taller than Craig, which made him feel slightly off put.

"Now Feldspar, I know that you broke my nose, not but a month ago," Cartman commented, touching his slightly crooked nose as if remembering it. "I'm sure you think that I hold this against you, but you'd be wrong, I am, after all, a fair and tolerate King. I will not keep you from joining because of something small like that. But I am curious, curious as to why you'd choose to be a Thief and not a warrior."

"Because my skills would be more useful as one," Craig answered instantly, clenching his jaw as Cartman put an arm around his shoulders and pulled him towards the stick that stood on the illuminated pedestal. "I want to be useful."

"Is that so?" Cartman asked, narrowing his eyes, his smirk nasty. "Yes, I'm sure that's all this is. You want to be useful. I'm sure it has nothing to do with our little Barbarian." Craig bristled at that, and by Cartman's chuckle, he knew that the boy had noticed.

"I'm a Grand Wizard, Feldspar," Cartman told him, tapping his hat lightly with his staff. "I know all. You think that by hiding behind this weaker class you can hide what you really are from him?" Craig felt ice flood his system, but it didn't show on his face.

"I'm not hiding," he pushed out through a mouth that wouldn't work right.

"Oh, sure you aren't," Cartman said, chuckling low. "I'll let you join my side, I'll let you join because we all know, Craig. We all know you're a monster." Turning them both away from the stick, the fat boy pointed towards the open door of the castle and said, "You think you can make Tweek believe you're a good person, but it's only a matter of time before he realizes what you really are too."

Craig was about to shove Cartman away when from outside there was a shout.

"THE DROW ELVES! THE DROW ELVES ARE ATTACKING!"

Face suddenly grim, Cartman said, "Well Feldspar, it looks like it's time to prove you and your group is worth something." Grabbing two short, serrated wooden knives, Cartman handed them to Craig and said, "We'll finish this later. Right now, we have a stick to protect."