CHAPTER TWO: WAKING UP TO A NEW WORLD

It really was seeming like Ella would ever wake up. Sometimes she sparked and sometimes lightning caught equipment on fire but never did her eyes open. The world outside hers fell apart and realigned and fell apart again. The "falling apart again" being when Zoom so easily overcame him, so easily brought him to the brink of death, and then preceded to parade it all over the city, holding Barry by the neck, like he was nothing more than a rag doll.

When he shut his eyes, images of him broken replaced images of his mother broken, and he didn't know which was worse… images of absolute terror or images of absolute heartbreak.

Since waking up in the hospital wing of the lab a couple days after the fight with Zoom, and remembering what had taken place, Barry wasn't sure he was ever going to walk again. He would never be this truthful with anyone, but he almost didn't want to walk again.

But he did. In the two week since the fight, he's gone from bedridden to wheelchair, then graduated from wheelchair to a cane. Now he's at a rather normal state, which for anyone else would be great, but since he's normally far from normal, it isn't. But super speed aside, he can walk, though rather stiffly; as his bones aren't 100% knitted back together yet.

Ella wasn't healing the same way. No one was able to comprehend what he did to her; not even Harry, and Jay hasn't been around to offer his input (Barry wasn't sure if these new friends of his fell into the 'realigning' or 'falling apart' bit of the last couple months).

They could get more answers if she would open her eyes, but every time Barry came in and sat with her, they didn't move. She didn't move. Things around her did, but she stayed the same. Though he didn't know if her ears worked, he talked to her a lot. He felt silly at first, like speaking to her was just the same as speaking to himself, but it wasn't. Or it felt like it wasn't. Each time Barry came to visit her, words flowed naturally out of his mouth, all the words containing the fears, the worries, and the self-doubt.

Even if she wasn't unconscious, Barry thought Ella would listen just the same. He could imagine her eyebrows knitting together in concern or her sweet voice giving him encouragement. He always saw how kind she was to people; in school and now, how she tried to make everyone feel wanted.

Sometimes Barry did just quietly watched her, mulling over what Decree has said pertaining to Ella and him. Decree always wanted control, always wanted the upper hand, and when the particle accelerator exploded, he got just that. The knowledge of the future. Though he spoke of it being Fate as if she was an actual being he has met, it didn't change the fact he got what he wanted: control. He knew how to control Barry before Barry even knew she was a thing that could control him.

Ella was also someone who had control and the upper hand, but she didn't long for it. She never used it for manipulation or to get what she wanted. She used it to give other people what they wanted. Even now, in a coma and unable to consciously do it, she was there for Barry.

And if he wasn't pondering over their future together or running from his nightmares, Barry was thinking about how she could possibly know his secret. He'd never forget how his name was to be her last breath. He'd never forget the small smile that overtook her face before life left her body. He'd never forget the life leaving her body and how he yet again stole someone's future away…

Except he didn't. How did he give it back to her?


"I know you want to go and see your family, your bookstore, but there are still so many things that are so uncertain. It would be best if you stayed here a little while longer. We need to make sure you're in control and we could really run some more tests…" Caitlin spoke in a gentle voice and Ella wanted to listen, for all she was saying was out of concern for her, but Ella just needed everything to be normal.

She needs to cuddle her cat, Leo. She needs to call her parents. She needs to feel the rough texture of a hardback book in her hands and have the smell of new pages overcome her. But most of all, she needs her fingers to stop tingling. She needs the random lightning bolts dropping from the ceiling to cease. She needs the jagged scar across her chest to be gone.

And it's really hitting Ella hard that she really shouldn't be needing anything. That the hole where the bullet pierced her lung should still be there. That she should hidden under a pile of dirt in a black coffin, covered in flowers, and a gravestone that said 'Ella Grace Peterson, beloved daughter, granddaughter, and mother to her cat'.

But instead she was trying to remember how to breathe as Caitlin listed all the things they needed to do before she could leave. Before she could back to her normal life.

Things will never be the same. Ella squeezed her eyes shut with that thought and then followed up with, "But I still have to try to make it that way."

"I'm sorry, what?" Caitlin broke off her spiel to understand Ella's random outburst.

"I can't do this. I can't not be normal. I don't… I don't care, I just can't," Ella tried to explain herself but the words kept getting jumbled up. She repeated, "I just can't," before bolting out of the medical room.

She turned a corner, and then another. And another and another. It wasn't long before her legs decided to give up and she collapsed to the ground, letting out a sob.

The air around Ella began to cackle and became heavy with electricity. Another sob fell out but it wasn't the only unexpected thing. Suddenly a blinding lightning bolt struck the ground beside her and she flinched back against the wall. Another hit the ground in front of her. Ella's vision swam in and out of view as she looked in horror at the scorched marks left on the otherwise white, unblemished tile. What was wrong with her?

What did Barry do to her?

As if she imagined him there, he just appeared. "Ella, hey—"

"Barry, leave me. I can't- I can't control it, it just k-k-keeps coming…" Her teeth chattered alongside the cold terror that ran through her body. Her panicked eyes met his.

"You're wrong. You can control it," Barry knelt down next to her and spoke gently, "Take a slow breath…" He instructed, but Ella couldn't move. She was paralyzed by her fear. "Ella, listen to me. Take a slow breath, count to five."

She tried but her "slow breath" was a short, gasping one. All of her "slow breaths" were short, gasping ones.

"Slower. Slower…" He repeated after each breath with a soothing hand on her leg, and his calm voice slowly warmed her up. "Slower… one, two, three, four, five. Now hold it, five more seconds."

The knot in her chest began to unravel as she followed his directions.

"And breathe out. One, two, three, four, five."

Ella didn't know how long she sat in that hall with Barry squatting beside her. She didn't know when he stopped speaking but his low voice still played in her ear. The crackling air began to dissipate and the panic left her, leaving her exhaustedly confused.

"Barry, what happened?" She finally asked in a quiet voice and he flinched like Ella had screamed at him.

"Ella, I'm so sorry," Barry replied, voice breaking. "I have no idea… I just- I've just seen so much death, and I just keep failing in protecting the people I love. I don't deserve them. I don't deserve you. I don't know how you connect in to all of this…" He tried to explain but this whole mess was a jumbled bunch of thoughts in his mind. He didn't know where to begin.

Ella let out a bitter laugh. "That freak who took me surely knew how I was connected to all of this." She thought back to his comments about her and Barry. Could her wildest dreams actually come true? "He was a seer. He could predict the future."

Barry nodded slowly, and Ella got a heavy feeling he was holding something back. "What are you not telling me?"

He hesitated, knowing neither him nor Ella would know what would set her off in a panic attack again. "Decree got away," he finally admitted, causing Ella to close her eyes again.

Count to five.

Repeat.

The man who shot her, but was after Barry, was still lose? There was a target on both of their backs!

"You had just gotten shot and I went to you, and then… then static filled the air and I started zapping you with lightning bolts from my fingers. I don't know but it like, took hold, and we were connected by one lightning bolt. It was massive, powerful. Whatever happened then, is what gave you these," He paused, voice laced with guilt, as he tried to find the right word, "Powers."

"Powers…" Ella echoed faintly, eyes still shut. "They don't feel like powers. They feel… like a curse."

It was Barry's turn to shut his eyes. "Don't say that," he whispered in a broken voice. "God, Ella, I'm so sorry."

She opened her eyes to look at him and took one last deep breath, and then she did what she always did: make the hurt disappear. "Barry, don't be. It… it's my fault. I knew too much. I always know too much. I always see things I shouldn't and I always have the burden of a secret on my heart. My bullet-free heart." It was Ella's turn to get choked up, even though she was just trying to comfort him. "You saved my life, Barry. It was because of your secret I was kidnapped, but it was my knowledge of it that got me in trouble, and it was you that saved me from dying. Thank you, because of that I can hug my cat, I can read my books, and I can see my parents. And I'm pretty sure I gained a few friends, because I'm not letting you guys out of my sight for a bit. Not till we figure this out."

"I don't want you out of my sight…" Barry said quietly, making Ella look away. "I promise I will help you through this, no matter who is to blame here. Cisco and Caitlin are so smart and they've been dealing with me for a while now. They can help you too, and then Harry… it's a bit complicated where Harry's involved but I think his intentions are good. And you know Iris and Joe… they're part of this too. You'll never be alone, Ella."

She took a long, slow breath before pushing herself up. "That's quite a promise, Barry," Ella warned, but she was fighting a smile.

Back in the medical room, Ella sat in a hospital bed. She stared blankly ahead as Caitlin carefully drew blood from her arm. Tears burned her eyes and her heart pounded, but with Barry holding her other hand, she managed not to strike anyone down. Though if given the choice, she'd probably strike herself down. For she had been watching when Caitlin first began and instead of the vial filling with red when the needle pierced her skin, it filled with silver.

"Oh. Wow," Caitlin muttered in surprise before catching Ella's horrified eyes, "I've seen weirder things, trust me, Ella." A soft smile appeared in comfort on Barry's friend's face and he took that moment to come from leaning on the glass wall and join in trying to calm Ella down.

"It looks like lightning, which you seem to have a talent with. Just a side effect," Barry reasoned, but sat next to her and squeezed her hand just the same, because the light had left Ella's eyes, causing any hope in his to flicker. She didn't say a word for the next couple minutes.

Nor did Ella say a word when Caitlin finished, and she didn't say a word as she followed them out of the med room to the lab room, where Cisco leaned over a computer, bringing up all her old medical files as the new samples loaded.

"So you nearly killing us in your coma aside, this power of yours is pretty cool," Cisco commented, nonchalantly, to Ella. "I mean, being able to control lightning? Kind of classic superhero power. But I feel like 'Lightning' as a superhero name would be kinda lame. Plus we can't add like doctor, because you weren't a doctor. Though Dr. Lightning does actually sound pretty sweet…"

Cisco rambled on, unaware that Ella's brown eyes grew wider and wider, so Barry cut him off, "Hey Cisco, buddy, I feel like we're getting a bit ahead of ourselves."

"What?" Cisco finally looked up and saw Ella's expression, "Ohhh. Okay." The moment grew awkward as no one knew what to say next, causing Ella to rub her eyes.

"I feel like such a fragile thing. Like I could crack at any second, and I really, really don't want to be," Ella said as her hands fell back to her side. "So stop treating me as something breakable. If you guys can act like I am, then I can act like I am, and maybe one day I can believe it too."

Two things happened in that next moment that caused the team to not reply to Ella's plea: the computer closes to where Caitlin sat dinged, signaling bloodwork was done. She immediately began to analyze the report.

"This is insane…" She mumbled, lost in Ella's silver blood results.

Simultaneously, the computer closed to Cisco beeped, signaling something amok in the city. He squinted at the screen as he read the police report, causing Cisco to swallow.

"Kidnapping with a ransom. Location: the saw mill right outside of town," He debriefed, but before Barry could even say 'on it', a yelp escaped from Ella.

Turning to her, Barry saw in his slow motion way of his, her skin burning white and melting into a jagged streak, bolting to the ceiling. And then she was gone.

Static sizzled in the air, a common repercussion of when Ella's lightning is used.

"Okay, yeah. That was pretty awesome," Cisco said in awe, though while, all right, it had been rather breathtaking, terror filled Barry more than anything.

Because Ella was gone. Disappeared in a lightning bolt through the ceiling.

Where did she go?


AN: thank you guys for the support! I know my updates are pretty sporadic. you didn't think I'd ever post another chapter, did you? (I don't blame you, I wondered right up till I finished it) please bear with me though! I work so much that I don't have a lot of time to sit down and write but writing is my escape and I need to do it or I'll go crazy. I hoped you liked this chapter! let me know :D - Anna