Tweek

He'd known it was a trap.

He'd known it was a trap! It wasn't some way for him to feel better about what happened, blaming other people, no, Tweek had known the whole mess was going to end up being a trap the moment they'd stepped into that stupid plaza and he'd been right. No, he'd known it was going to end up being a trap from the moment that Craig suggested that it was. The idea had lodged in his brain and call in fatalism or whatever you want, but he'd known they were walking right into a trap.

And now Craig is gone.

Quite possibly the worst part of it all was that Tweek had seen it in Craig's eyes, the fact that he thought it was a trap as well. They'd both been ready for a surprise attack, they'd been waiting for it! It was entirely expected, and yet they'd still gotten jumped like they were a couple of green warriors seeing their first battle. Even after they could see their enemies, they hadn't been able to win.

And now Craig is gone.

Who would have even thought that the girls of all people would join the game and then be that good at fighting? Tweek hadn't expected it. Seeing Red hadn't even triggered his paranoia. Since when did girls want to join a fantasy game!? And for that matter, how was it fair to have them around when they were all wielding dangerous weapons that could hurt people? Tweek wasn't going to hurt a girl! That was wrong, right?

And now Craig is gone. Craig is gone and it's all my fault because I should have known what was happening and I should have fought the girls harder so they couldn't carry him away and I should have protected him instead of letting him get torn to shreds. He was bleeding all over and being dragged away by the girls and I couldn't even do anything! I couldn't even follow him and I lost the girls and now I can't do anything and CRAIG IS GONE!

"AUGH!" Yanking on his hair, despite the way it made his injuries flare up with pain, Tweek tossed his head around, looking about the City Wok complex helplessly. There's no one! Nothing! They're gone! Everywhere he turned, all he found was more clean pavement that didn't show footprints and more nothing. The girls he'd been chasing had vanished, seemingly into thin air, taking with them any hope of finding Craig. No no nonono why? WHY IS THIS HAPPENING!?

Shaking, Tweek crouched down on the ground, holding his head in his hands, trying to make his brain shut up. But he couldn't! They had taken Craig and he'd been bleeding to death already! Everyone knew that the girls hated boys, why would they help him?! What if they questioned and tortured him? What if Tweek never saw him again!? What if they killed Craig and then came and killed the rest of the Humans too? It was aLL TOO MUCH PRESSURE!

He felt like his head was going to explode, though, for the life of him, Tweek couldn't think of how that would make things any worse. Why did they have to take him WHY!?

"Hey, what're you doing here?" At the sound of that voice, distorted through his screaming thoughts, Tweek slowly looked up, his expression nothing short of murderous. Shaking, he slowly stood up, even as he heard the same voice yell, "Hey! You're a Human! This is Elven territory."

"Th-they took Craig…" Tweek mumbled under his breath, twitching harder the longer the seconds dragged on. He's gone. The girls took Craig. They kidnapped Craig! The pressure kept building in his head, it was too much. He couldn't handle it!

"What are you mumbling about?" another Elf called. The addition of a new voice only made Tweek shake more violently. "Hey, Human! Get out!" Get out? But he's already gone!

With a screech, Tweek spun and leaped at the Elves with a cry of, "HE'S GONE!" Unable to even begin to defend themselves against him, the Elves could do nothing as Tweek swung his club, knocking one of them off his feet and tossing the other one back. "HE'S GONE THEY TOOK HIM!" Leveling another vicious swing at the unfortunate Elves, Tweek hardly registered the sound of his club connecting with flesh. His vision was distorted, all he could see was the image of Craig getting dragged away and it made him want tohurt something.

The Elves were yelling something at him, but he couldn't hear them anymore. All he could see was red. All he could hear was the screaming in his own head. An arrow hit him, but he couldn't feel the pain anymore. With a roar, Tweek leaped at the blurs of green in his vision, laying into them with his weapons as he desperately tried to escape his own head. THEY TOOK HIM HE'S GONE HE'S DYING HE'S DEAD JUST MAKE IT STOP!

Even though he couldn't see anymore he just kept swinging, desperate to make it all stop. Why did they take him?! Where did they take him!? WHY WON'T IT STOP? He heard screaming but he couldn't even tell if it was in his own mind or not. It was only once it stopped that Tweek realized it had been him. Falling to his knees as the weight of everything crashed down on him, Tweek shivered and trembled as the ground wavered in his vision. The Elves were gone, but so was any remaining idea of what was and wasn't real.

Slamming his palms into his forehead, hardly caring when the blood on them got on his face, Tweek struggled to force his brain back into place. They took him, he's gone. They killed him, I got Craig killed. I couldn't even catch the girls. I'm useless, I'm nothing, I'm worthless, I'm-

Get up.

Quick enough that his neck creaked, Tweek flung his head up, staring through the haze at a distorted and shimmering image. He couldn't make it out, there was still too much static in his mind for anything to be clear, he was panicking too much to calm down, much less stand. But he knew that voice. He knew that voice.

Pick up your weapons and get up.

Scrambling around on the ground, Tweek's fingers curled around the smooth handle of his club. At the feeling of that quickly cooling wood under his fingers, Tweek watched as his vision started to clear. Slowly, the sun started to brighten and the world ceased to look quite so red.

You're alive, so get up and act like it.

Twitching violently, Tweek blinked repeatedly as he looked up at that seemingly ever-present image of Craig. Injured and bloodied, the wavering apparition was standing above him, one of his knives drawn, a solid, stony expression on his face. Even though it wasn't real, even though it was all in his head, Tweek could feel himself get to his feet, something in him resonating with the image.

You didn't need me before, so fucking pull yourself together. Craig's facsimile looked down at him as Tweek stood there, shaking and in pain. Even though he sounded mean, Tweek could hear that familiar strength and that unerring calm just under the surface. Clenching his fingers around the handle of his club, Tweek bit his already bleeding lip, holding back any number of things he wanted to say, to ask.

Because Craig was right, he'd done this for years before the boy had ever shown up. It wasn't like this, people weren't dying. It was just me. I just had to keep me alive.

Then keep yourself alive now, the image of Craig told him, his expression unchanging. I'll be fine. Though Tweek wanted to protest, he knew that he wouldn't be able to come up with the words to fight his own mind. Instead, he just lifted his chin and dragged in a shuddering gulp of air that filled his lungs and drove out some of the fear that he was drowning in. Good, Mental Craig said, and Tweek could have sworn that something brushed his cheek. Now go.

Without any real conscious direction from his mind, Tweek started to run. As his feet pounded against the pavement and his lungs started to burn with exertion, the blond tried to let all of the panic out before it killed him. He didn't have time for one of his anxiety attacks, Craig was in danger of dying, he had to do something. Though he'd never managed to fight off one of his panic attacks before, he also hadn't had one since Craig had become his friend.

As long as Craig was out there somewhere, he'd be fine. No, he needed to be fine.

Skidding over icy pavement, Tweek kept running, passing through Elven territory and Human territory alike without thought. All that mattered was getting to Kupa Keep. Clyde and Token would be there, one of them would know what to do. They'd be able to save Craig where he couldn't. He clung to those thoughts, along with the faint sound of Craig's voice in his head telling him to keep moving.

He'd never thought about how big the Kingdoms of Zaron were until he was trying to get through them. Everything stretched and bent like it always did when he was on the verge of lapsing into a panic attack but he refused to stop running. He could collapse once he got there, he could crumble later but right now he had to keep moving.

Darting through a street, Tweek was met with a flash of lights and the sound of screeching. Turning, he saw one of the monsters that had always scared him away from these things headed towards him. Without even giving it a second thought, Tweek danced around the roaring beast of metal and steel as he escaped its deadly path. He could hear the blaring of horns but he just clenched his teeth tighter and kept moving, unwilling to let it stop him.

Everything hurt, but he could hear Craig's voice in his head, and that calm power was what carried him forward.

Just when he was sure his legs were going to give out on him, Tweek caught sight of the towers of Kupa Keep as they loomed large in his vision. Hardly even able to draw breath anymore, Tweek could do nothing but stumble forward and collapse to the ground outside of the kingdom's walls. Vaguely, he could make out yelling and people around him, but all he could do was fight the feeling of something crushing his chest and preventing him from breathing.

You're fine, you're alive.

As feeling started to return to his lungs, Tweek opened his eyes and stared up at the image of Craig before letting his lids close once more, unable to do more than pant heavily and twitch. Aware of someone trying to help him to his feet, Tweek did his best to cooperate, forcing aching legs to jolt into action once more, even though they protested his every step. Catching sight of a flurry of pink and purple and orange, Tweek felt some semblance of normality take away the panic still encroaching on his mind.

"-to him? Is he alright?" Tweek twisted his head in the direction of the voice, but he couldn't make his sore throat answer the question.

"I don't know! Tweekers just collapsed on the ground in front of the house~"

"Hang on, where's Craig."

"It's Feldspar, Ryan."

"What happened to 'im? He's all bruised an' stuff!"

Voices around him beginning to blur into one, Tweek picked his head up and focused on the person directly in front of him. As the worried looking brunette threw Tweek's other arm over his shoulder, the boy asked, "Teacup, what's wrong?"

"Th-they took Craig," Tweek croaked, looking up into Clyde's brown eyes urgently as he tried to use whatever was left of his strength to communicate what was happening.

As he was guided over to the medical tent, Clyde asked, "Who took him? What are you-"

"THE GIRLS!" Tweek forced out, even though his voice cracked horribly halfway through. "Jesus," he whimpered, shivering as Kenny and Clyde carefully sat him down. "H-he was bleeding out and th-they just took him and I could –ghn- I couldn't do anything!" Reaching for his hair with aching limbs, Tweek clenched his hands in the tangled blond strands, unable to even pull without making it hurt worse.

"Tweeky, you're not making sense," Kenny said patiently. Now that he was sitting down, the world was starting to settle down for Tweek. While things came more into focus, Tweek struggled to take deep breaths. Turning around, Kenny put a hand to his mouth and yelled, "Scott! Be a dear and get a healing potion for Tweek!"

Still holding onto Tweek's arm, Clyde shook the boy lightly and said, "What are you talking about Teacup, why are you talking about the girls?" Fighting the panic that wanted to rise up at the disbelief surrounding him, Tweek shook his head, forcing himself to keep calm enough to talk.

"Th-the threat! The attacks! It w-was the girls! They attacked us, we couldn't-" Voice giving out, Tweek spent a moment coughing, even though it made his lungs burn, before talking again. "I couldn't stop them. Th-they separated us and th-then they- They blindfolded Craig and- The girls, th-they- He's-" As words failed him and the sudden urge to cry overcame him, Tweek could do nothing but press his trembling lips together and let Clyde wrap his arms around him in a hug.

Clenching his teeth to hold back the tears, Tweek kept muttering, "It's all my fault," as he shook and shivered. Wishing desperately that he could just make Craig reappear, Tweek found himself shaking in Clyde's arms as Kenny kept yelling things at various people, no doubt trying to figure out what was going on. Beside him, someone was trying to offer him a healing potion but he couldn't make his hands move. Nothing was working right.

Suddenly, a red cape swirled in his view and Tweek's body started to glow with golden light as Token carefully pried Clyde away from him. Handing the healing potion to the worried looking brunette, the Cleric muttered a healing spell over Tweek, removing the worst of his injuries from the fight against the girls. As the healing potion was pushed into his hands, Token knelt down before Tweek and asked, "Are you alright Tweek?"

Letting the healing potion soothe his painful throat, Tweek nodded, even though he knew that he wasn't okay and wouldn't be until they did something about Craig. But Token nodded anyway, accepting his answer. "Now," his brows furrowed as a dark look came over his face. "Are you sure that the girls attacked you?"

"Toke, come on, leave him alone," Clyde insisted, frowning at his friend. "Teacup needs to rest right now, look at him." Twitching, Tweek shook his head and pushed himself into a more upright position, trying to make his body cooperate with him.

"N-no! I have to tell the Grand Wizard!" Tweek insisted, his small hands grabbing for the edge of Token's cape. There was no calming property to the red fabric, unlike when Craig's weathered brown cloak touched him, Tweek's shaking didn't subside. But it did give him something to pull at as he desperately continued, "I swear! Ngh- It w-was the girls! Th-they attacked us Token! They took Craig! W-we have to-"

"Tweek, stop," the boy ordered, getting to his feet. "Unless you know where he is, we can't do anything." Upon hearing those words, Tweek could feel his twitching start to worsen. No, no they have to be able to do something! We can't just leave Craig there, he's going to die, the girls are going to kill him! Shaking his head violently, Tweek let out a soft whimper that prompted Clyde to put a hand on his arm.

"Token, th-they're gonna kill him!" Tweek insisted frantically, reaching a hand for his hair before Clyde caught it and held it down so he couldn't pull on his hair. Twitching horribly, the blond struggled weakly against the brunette's hold as he pushed out, "He w-was bleeding and- and I don't know where they t-took him and-"

"Tweekers, they're not going to kill him." Settling into Tweek's vision in a cloud of sparkling skirts, Kenny took the remaining health potion from his hand and continued, "They would have killed him there if they were going to kill him at all. It's going to be okay, I promise." Tweek wished he could believe the Princess but the memory of Craig's calm, bloody face kept creeping up.

"Why the hell is everyone talking about the girls fighting as Warriors of Zaron?" At the sound of Cartman's voice, Tweek's head shot up and he started to scramble to get up once more, needing to explain himself. But there's no way he'll listen to you! What if he laughs?! What if he tells everyone to do nothing?! What if Craig dies? Shaking those thoughts from his head, Tweek managed to push off the protesting Clyde as he scrambled to get to his feet.

"GRAND WIZARD!" he all but screeched, despite his protesting throat. Holding out one of his bloody hands, Tweek stumbled over to Cartman, who was already staring at him. His arms were crossed and a vaguely displeased look was on his face, but Tweek refused to allow himself to be cowed by it. It wasn't as if things could get any worse.

"Tweek, what the hell is all this supposed to be?" Cartman demanded, glaring down at the blond. As he stopped before Cartman, his whole body trembling, Tweek could only stand there as the boy continued, "I sent you and Feldspar to do a very simple thing and now you're coming back and spreading fake tidings that the girls are playing! What is that supposed to be?"

"B-but it's true," Tweek hurried to say as Clyde came up beside him, that same worried expression on his face. "Red showed up and then a bunch of other girls surrounded us and th-they just jumped us, man! Ngh- Oh Jesus, y-you have to believe me!" In the face of Cartman's continued skepticism, Tweek could feel himself start to break down.

"I don't have to do anything," Cartman said stubbornly, crossing his arms. "This is completely ridiculous, there's no way that Feldspar, a level nine Thief, could have been dragged away by the girls. He's far too strong." Squeezing his eyes shut to prevent himself from screaming, Tweek let Clyde pull him back as he forced his mind to calm down.Why won't he listen? Why does he never listen?! Craig's going to die!

"To be fair, oh Grand Wizard, it would make sense if it were the girls," Kenny pointed out, floating up on Tweek's other side. "Also, Tweekers isn't the type of Berzerker to lie about something like this. I think you should take him seriously~" Opening his eyes and staring at the Princess, Tweek watched in amazement as Cartman huffed and looked at Kenny grudgingly.

"Lady McCormick, you are the fairest maiden in all the land, surely you can understand why it's ridiculous to think that there are any girls who are more powerful than you," Cartman attempted to argue, though he didn't look like he believed himself. "Girls aren't allowed to be warriors of Zaron, you're, like, the only one."

NO, HE'S NOT THE ONLY ONE THERE ARE MORE OF THEM! Tweek tried to get back to Cartman, but Clyde pulled him away, dragging him over to where several other Human warriors had gathered. "Teacup, it's not worth it," Clyde was saying, getting in front of him so he couldn't see Cartman or Kenny anymore. "You know the Grand Wizard is really stubborn."

"He's got a point," Daniel pointed out, drawing Tweek's attention. Crossing his arms, the level six Jew commented, "There's no way he's going to accept that there are girls in the game now. You know how he is." Shivering, Tweek let out a whimper because of course , he knew how Cartman was, but that didn't stop him from being wrong.

"Is it true though, are there really girls playing?" Brandon asked, his eyes wide with wonder. "What did they look like? Were they like Princess Kenny?"

Shaking his head helplessly, Tweek pushed out, "N-no! They were all in -ghn- f-flower armor and had sparkling shields and they were terrifying man!" Looking up at Clyde, Tweek twitched hard and said, "Th-they hate us! They hate humans!" Shivering at the recollection, Tweek looked down at the snow-covered ground as he tried to keep his breathing even. "Oh god, they're going to kill Craig!"

From behind Clyde, Tweek could hear Cartman insist, "Token, there is no way in hell that there are girls playing this game. Pigs will fly before girls will ever be cool enough to play Warriors of Z-"

Whatever else he'd been about to say died in his throat. As the sounds of boys gasping echoed around him, Tweek peaked around Clyde as the brunette turned around and he too let out a sound of awe. All Tweek could do was struggle not to scream because there, walking into the kingdom of Kupa Keep like nothing could touch them, were six people. Five, whose armor glittered in the sun, and one who shone for an entirely different reason.

In the stunned silence, Kenny muttered, "Looks like we're going to have to find some flying pigs now."

There, looking battered but okay was Craig. His cloak was fluttering around him and his vivid blue eyes were looking about the scene like he was searching for something. Whatever they were looking for though, the moment the landed on Tweek, they stayed there. Feeling his heart start hammering again like when he ran to the Castle, Tweek just stood there as the panic in his mind faded to nothing but a dull buzz. He's okay. He's okay. Craig is okay.

"What. The hell?" Cartman asked, his voice sounding strangely strangled as if he was choking on something.

Stepping forward, his gaze still never leaving Tweek, Craig stiffly said, "These are the Valkyries of Valhalla." It was only now that Tweek managed to register the people that Craig had brought with him.

Around Craig, almost like an official entourage, stood five girls, all decked out in glittering and shining armor. At the head of them was Wendy, her shield and sword both bearing matching purple flowers. To her right stood Bebe. The girl's long blond hair was fluttering behind her and her bow and quiver matched her red coat. To Wendy's left, Annie stood proudly, one hand on the hilt of her sword, the other on her hip. Behind them, both Red and Heidi were watching the boys around them with cool, collected gazes. Eyes flying back to Craig, Tweek tilted his head in question, only to receive a small shrug as if he were just as clueless as the blond as to how five girls had gotten into their kingdom.

From beside Tweek, Clyde softly murmured, "Wow, they're so… cool…"

Stepping forward, Wendy lifted her chin and looked at the gathered boys coldly. "As the leader of the Valkyries, I would like to extend a hand of peace to the Humans of Kupa Keep. I hope that this marks the beginning of a profitable alliance between our factions." Turning to Cartman, the girl stiffly said, "Because if it does not, the girls will have no choice but to join with the Elves and destroy you."

In the silence, Kenny asked, "So… Does that mean we get our Thief back?"