Craig
This hadn't been Craig's idea of victory.
Okay sure, he'd felt fucking amazing when he'd actually gotten the pictures and escaped, but now that he was out and still able to hear the sounds of fighting coming from the Elven kingdom but was unable to help, it sort of sucked. It didn't help that it felt like he was being suffocated by people, all of whom wanted to know what was going on. He wanted to know what was happening too, but he was almost as clueless as all of them.
Humans had started to gather the moment the explosions had started. Word had spread quickly through the carrier ravens that something was happening, but no one had dared go over there for fear of getting massacred. Of course the moment Craig had blasted into camp, twigs sticking out of his costume and a light in his eyes, things had started to make sense.
Bebe had been the first one out of the castle, heading straight over to Craig with a single-minded purpose. He was really trying to explain to her what had happened, but he was spending most of his time craning his neck in a stupidly vain attempt to see if everything was alright. All he could see was the smoke and hear the screams. Tweek's still over there. Craig wasn't sure what he was supposed to do, but he couldn't stop himself from worrying slightly about the boy. If Kyle and the other Elves decided to take prisoners… Well, Craig didn't want to think about it.
"Craig- er, Feldspar, please focus." Bebe had her hands planted on her hips and a slightly irritated expression on her face like she wasn't sure how to get him to listen. "Where's Tweek? Why are the Elven kingdoms on fire? Princess Kenny's been checking the carrier ravens and Token was using the –ah… Mirror of scrying? To figure out what's going on." Snapping her fingers in front of his face, startling him into looking down at her, the girl huffed. "We just want to know what's going on."
"I already told you," he said flatly, turning around so he could look to the gap in the fence that Tweek would probably come through before turning back to Kyle's yard. "Daniel had a crazy plan and we went with it and it worked out. Tweek's still over there fighting." He was supposed to fight Kyle. If that dick hurts him, I will kill him…
"Feldspar, be a dear and tell us what still fighting entails?" Kenny twittered, tossing his blond hair out of his eyes. "I don't recall us ever agreeing to attack the Elves, do you, Bebe? This sounds an awful lot like you all went off and-"
"Fuck off McCormick," Craig said easily, feeling more and more frustrated by the moment. Why did I agree to something like this? They should be leaving soon, that or the fighting should stop because something happened. Eventually, it would have to be over, right? Why was it dragging out so long?
Unexpectedly, Bebe grabbed his arm and tugged it. "Tweek isn't fighting Kyle, is he?" she asked, her eyes sharp. Glancing down at her, Craig took a breath before nodding shortly and tapping his foot. As if this put everything into perspective, Bebe turned to Kenny and said, "M'lady, if it wouldn't be too much trouble, you'll probably want to get everyone else out here. This is going to be important and they're probably going to be low on health."
Turning her eyes back on Craig, Bebe hummed under her breath before saying, "Okay, so what was the plan."
Finally managing to pull his attention away from whatever was going on with Tweek, Craig tugged on his chullo with the arm that wasn't being held captive by Bebe and said, "The only way we were going to get anywhere was if we knew what the Elves were planning, but the Grand Wizard and everyone else wasn't going to figure out jackshit, so we took matters into our own hands. Daniel planned a diversion, Tweek was supposed to pretend to go after the stick, and I was supposed to look at the battle plans." Patting his pocket, where his phone was, Craig said, "I have pictures of it for Token."
"Pictures of what now?" As the black boy drew up beside Craig, the Noirette, reached into his pocket and handed Token his phone. One eyebrow quirking up, Token took it and turned it on so he could look at the pictures. "You guys are impressively stupid," the boy muttered under his breath, whistling softly. "I mean, I sort of figured most of this out, but wow…"
"Tweek's still back there," Craig told Token, even though he wasn't sure why he couldn't let it go. He'll be fine, it's Tweek, he knows what he's doing. Pulling on his arm again, Bebe drew Craig's attention away from Token, who was showing Kenny the Elven battle plans, and back to her.
"Was Tweek doing alright?" she asked curiously, her big brown eyes soft and calm. Unable to quite draw from Bebe the same level of calm he could from Tweek, Craig took a moment to order his thoughts before finally speaking.
"He was a badass," the boy admitted, his eyes growing distant as he remembered Tweek's mischievous grin and the way he'd tugged at the Noirette's hat, almost teasingly. "It's been a while since we've been able to have fun like that, I think we all needed it. But you should have seen him." Shaking his head, half in disbelief, Craig's eyebrows went up as he said. "He was a fucking beast, just taking people out left and right like it was nothing." As he spoke, he could feel the tension in his shoulders start to release. Of course he's going to be fine, he's way stronger than he used to be.
Smiling in that way of hers that Clyde had once described as heavenly, Bebe giggled and said, "I bet he was amazing. I wish I could have seen it."
"I wish I could have watched more as well." Even though his voice was still his usual deadpan, Craig's blue eyes lit up at the words. "But I had a job to do." Eyes turning back towards the Elven kingdoms, Craig muttered, "If we had been allowed to have more people, I think we could have taken the stick. The smoke bombs made it seem like we had more people than we did though, so we were fine." Snorting, he added, "Damn, I had fun."
"Well, politics isn't for everyone," Kenny quipped, before pointing out something to Token, who nodded. Rolling his eyes at the comment, Craig went back to looking at Bebe, who was grinning from ear to ear.
"I'm glad you two got to have fun," she said, before leaning around Craig and saying, "Lady McCormick, if everyone just played with politics, then you wouldn't have a leader because the Grand Wizard would get bored of it."
"True that," Kenny agreed, giving a lady-like giggle at her remark.
Suddenly, there was a swell of noise around them as the Humans in the Kingdom all started cheering loudly. Finding himself being shoved around as the people who'd been listening to him talk about the fight when to see, Craig was momentarily disoriented and it was only thanks to Bebe keeping a hold on him that he wasn't pushed over entirely when several people shoved past him at once. They're back, Craig realized, a buzzing filling his chest. Tweek's back.
As if he'd been summoned by the Noirette's thoughts, a sudden cry of joy cut above the rest of the noise. "C-Craig! We did it!" Turning around slowly, slightly hampered by Bebe's grip on his arm, Craig expected to see Tweek, his face, glowing with pride, running for him. Maybe a little beat up, but still happy. What he found instead left him feeling cold and confused.
The boy's arms were thrown wide like he'd been about to hug Craig, but he wasn't going towards the Noirette, no, he was backpedaling slowly. He was covered from head to toe in angry purple bruises, and that usually would have been enough to make the taller boy upset. But that wasn't what was so off about the situation, no it was the look of horror on Tweek's face that made Craig's stomach drop. No, that's not right, he's supposed to be excited. He sounded excited just a second ago, what's going on? Tweek didn't look happy at all, he looked like he wanted to scream actually. As he continued to back away, twitching harder as he did so, Craig furrowed his brows in confusion, wanting an explanation but unsure how to ask for one.
Clearly noticing Tweek's distress as well, Bebe put a smile on her face and gushed, "Tweek! Craig was just telling me about what happened! He said you were amazing~" Craig expected the boy to at least say something, but he just kept moving away, shaking his head as he did so. Though he had war paint streaked over his face, Craig could still see the color drain from the blonde's cheeks. There was pain intruding on his eyes, clouding them, making the green dim horribly. Feeling something cold settling in his gut as he watched it, Craig took a step forward, only for Tweek to jerking violently.
"Tweek, you look pale." Pulling Craig with her, Bebe started walking towards Tweek, worry covering her bright smile. As the boy twitched harder, she asked, "Is something wrong?"
"N-no." To Craig, that tone was so much worse than a panicked screech would have been. Tweek's voice sounded broken like there was something stuck in his throat that was keeping him from talking right. Worse still, his eyes were going from cloudy to weirdly shiny, like something was horribly wrong. No, Craig didn't need to be a genius to be able to see when something was making Tweek upset and right now, the blond looked like he wanted to simply fall to his knees and… Cry? Why isn't he looking at me? What the hell is going on?
Before Craig could ask, however, Tweek shivered violently and shrieked, "I NEED TO FIND CLYDE!" Eyes darting to the side, the boy suddenly ran away, shoving through Humans as he did so. What the hell? Feeling confusion and no small amount of dread settling in his stomach because they'd just fucking won, why was Tweek upset Craig started to head towards where he'd seen the blond disappear to when Cartman got in his way.
"Feldspar, I heard that you just attacked the Elves," the boy was saying, though the words were hardly registering because Craig had lost sight of that halo of blond and fuck, what was going on? "Though I hardly condone your methods, I have to admit, you guys were pretty cool. That was the kind of plan I was waiting for Token to-"
"Shut up," Craig pushed out, attempting to move past the boy, shaking Bebe off.
Instantly, Cartman's expression soured. "Excuse me Feldspar, what did you just say?" Looking down at the boy, trying to clear the thoughts of Tweek from his head long enough to think through what the fatass was saying, Craig gave up and just flipped Cartman off before shoving him out of the way.
"HEY! GET BACK HERE!" But Craig wasn't listening, all he could think about was Tweek and the pain in those bright green eyes that shouldn't have fucking been there and why had it been there at all. He could hear people around him calling his name, yelling congratulatory things out at him, but they sounded distorted, he couldn't understand what they were saying. Where did Tweek go? Why is he looking for Clyde? There were so many questions, but Craig couldn't focus on any one of them long enough to actually answer them.
Maybe he went to the medical tent. He was pretty banged up after all. Decidedly heading that direction, Craig walked past the edge of the castle and was about to head straight to the tent when something caught his eye and he stuttered to a halt. Standing there in the shadow of the castle, almost like they were hiding, was Clyde. In his arms, held tight in such a way that made something nasty and hot rear up in Craig's stomach, was the trembling form of Tweek.
He didn't know why, but for a second, all of the worry that had been building up vanished as the sudden urge to get upset at Clyde filled his mind. Because why the hell had Tweek run to Clyde if he was upset? Why was he hugging Clyde when he was clearly distressed? Why had he run away from the Noirette in the first place? It didn't matter that Clyde was Tweek's friend too, it didn't matter that the brunet hugged the blond boy all the time, there was something different about this that made Craig's blood boil.
Shoving down the desire to forcibly separate them, Craig took a step forward only to hear Clyde say, "It's okay, we'll go home." As he ushered Tweek away, completely oblivious to Craig's presence, the boy continued, "You've done enough today." Instead of saying no, instead of going back to Craig which is what Tweek should have done if he were upset, the blond boy just nodded meekly and rubbed at his eyes with his arm, like something was wrong with them. Wait… Is he… Crying?
Irritation at Clyde momentarily forgotten, Craig found himself opening his mouth and calling, "Hey Tweek, where are you going?" Instead of turning around, Tweek just flinched and hunched his shoulders. Clyde on the other hand instantly whirled to face Craig, and the Noirette was taken aback by the angry look on his friend's face.
Crossing his arms and lifting himself to his full height, the boy icily informed him, "We're leaving, Feldspar." What the hell? Feeling his irrational frustration at Clyde rise up again because okay, not letting him even talk to Tweek was just one step too far, Craig's brows furrowed and he started to speak when Clyde cut him off. "No, go back and enjoy the celebration, Teacup and I are leaving."
What gives you the fucking right- Struggling to draw himself back together, Craig was about to speak again when Clyde sniffed in contempt and added, "Besides, don't you have a girlfriend to look after?" With those words, the boy turned back to Tweek and put his arm around the boy's shoulders as he pulled him around the castle and out of view. Unsure what he was even supposed to do, Craig just stood there, his mouth hanging open. Because Clyde had just walked away with Tweek after pretty much telling him to fuck off and how the fuck had he even gotten to this point?
Fighting down the anger that was attempting to fill his mind, Craig finally closed his mouth and drew in a deep, shaking breath. I've got to go after them. Fuck what Clyde said, he was going to talk to Tweek and figure out what was wrong. That's how he did things when it came to the blond, why would he do anything different? If Tweek was upset about something, and he most definitely was, then Craig would… Would ruffle his hair and tell him it was okay and ask what was wrong until Tweek told him and everything was better. It sounded entirely weak and useless to put it into those terms, but it fucking worked so that's what he was going to do.
He was just about to follow them when a voice stopped him in his tracks. "Craig, where are you going?" Bebe's tone held an indiscernible emotion, but Craig didn't even want to bother with turning around. I have to get to Tweek, something's wrong, I have to- To what, make it better? When he was probably the one to have fucked everything up in the first place? Because it's always me, whenever Tweek is upset, it's my fault these days. He almost wanted to sneer at his own patheticness. As his chest began to fill with self-loathing he stiffly turned around and faced Bebe, who had her arms crossed and her mouth set into an unimpressed line.
His own face settling into his usual deadpan, Craig lifted his chin and said, "I'm going after Tweek." What else did she think he was going to do?
But Bebe raised an eyebrow as if this answer wasn't good enough. "No, you actually aren't you're staying right here."Craig couldn't help but bristle at that. Of course I'm fucking leaving, I fucked something up and now I have to fix it. The longer it went, the more certain he was that this was all somehow his fault. And now Clyde's pissed at me as well. Fuck fuck fuck- Unaware of Craig's internal monologue, Bebe asked, "And what do you mean Tweek left? He was here just a moment ago."
Crossing his arms, Craig impatiently informed her, "I fucked something up and Tweek got upset, so he just left. Clyde went with him." The image of Clyde holding Tweek close flashed through Craig's mind and it was a struggle to keep his face flat and not let his inexplicable anger from showing. Deciding that this was explanation enough, Craig started to turn around only for Bebe to grab him by the front of his shirt and turn him back around.
"You're only just realizing you screwed something up?" Bebe asked, making it clear that she thought Craig was an idiot for not seeing it sooner. Letting go of him so she could put a hand to her temple, the girl shook her head and muttered, "Craig, please look at me and tell me, honestly, do you think that going after him while he's upset is actually going to help?"
"It's always worked before," Craig said stubbornly, frustrated that she was trying to stop him. They're probably already halfway to Clyde's house by now. Why is she trying to stop me? "What else am I supposed to do? Just ignore it?"
Huffing in irritation, Bebe crossed her arms once more and snapped, "Craig, Tweek looked like he was about to cry."
"HE DID FUCKING CRY!" Craig suddenly burst, his flat tone increasing in volume suddenly. Finding his frustration coming to his tongue all too easily, the Noirette continued, "He was fucking crying and Clyde was hugging him and fuck that, I'm Tweek's friend and I was the one who made him upset so I'm the one who needs to go and fix it." I sound like an asshole, he realized. Unfortunately, he couldn't make himself give a shit.
Besides, he didn't need to because Bebe was more than happy to for him. "You sound selfish Craig Tucker," she informed him, all of the patience and nice-girl attitude he'd seen up until this point having evaporated. "He might be your friend but he's Clyde's friend too and right now, I don't think it's your place to be going after him. Besides, you have duties you have to deal with here."
"Fuck. Duties," Craig said very clearly as if he thought that this point wasn't already abundantly clear. Hands balling into fists, Craig continued, "Clyde wasn't the one who fucking became with that spaz in the first place, I was. He's not allowed to come along and pretend to know what's best for Tweek, no one is, only I-"
Smack!
Suddenly, Craig was holding the side of his face in shock as Bebe glared up at him, her hand still raised as if she were thinking about slapping him again. "Get a fucking grip," she hissed out, her eyes narrowing. "If you think for even a second that this is something that's going to make Tweek feel any better then you know absolutely nothing. You do not own him and you do not get to decide who he can and can't run to for help when you decide to go and screw up."
"I don't even know what I did!" Craig protested, still rubbing his cheek, unsure what else he was supposed to do. "I'm not-"
"I don't care if you don't know what you did wrong, I don't care what you think you are or aren't doing. Tweek has every right to feel upset and if he wants to deal with it by going to Clyde then you will stop acting like a jealous asshole and get over it." Breathing heavily, obviously winded by her own speech, Bebe drew herself back together and said, "Now, are you going to keep acting like a six-year-old who has to share his toys, or are you going to pull yourself together?"
Still staring at her, unsure how he was supposed to react to what she'd said, Craig let his hand fall back to his side softly. Jealous? Am I really acting jealous? But she had a point, didn't she? He was acting like a piece of shit and clearly he'd already been enough of a fuck-up to make Tweek cry so why did he think he'd be able to fix anything? Jesus, Clyde's like my brother, why am I jealous of him? He's protecting Tweek, which is what I've been trying to do for months now. Why am I being an asshole about it?
Expression softening, Bebe sighed and swept her hair behind her head before giving Craig a sympathetic look. "I know you want to help Tweek, I really do. I want to know what's wrong as well, but currently, you have to placate Cartman before he throws you out and you have to play the part they've given you, otherwise you'll destroy all the work we've done already. If you go after Tweek now, not only will you hurt him more, but all of the people here that you're trying to keep him safe from will make his life hard to. Do you want that?"
"No," Craig muttered, his voice sounding hollow to his own ears as his insides started to rot away from the guilt eating at him. "No, I don't want that."
Stepping into the shadow of the castle with Craig, Bebe lightly touched his arm before softly saying, "You do know that Tweek isn't going to abandon you for someone else, right?" For a moment, Craig was confused as to why she'd said this, but as the words started to sink in, he realized that she'd managed to hit the very core of the emotions churning around inside of him.
"Fuck, I know that," Craig muttered, looking down at the ground. He felt childish, getting upset over something like this, but on the other hand, he was a child, so maybe it was normal. To be honest, he'd never cared enough about a person to feel jealous in any sense of the word about them. Token and Clyde were his friends, sure, but he didn't care when they hung out without him and even when they did hang out with Cartman's gang or something for extended periods of time, he wasn't jealous. Hell, it hardly registered at all.
But Tweek was somehow different. He'd gotten irrationally upset over the idea that someone other than him could possibly make the boy feel better and it had made him act like an idiot. It was scary that the blond could evoke such a powerful emotion in him when literally nothing else ever had or could, and Craig didn't like it, but he didn't know how he was supposed to get rid of it when the feeling clung to him like some sort of malignant tumor.
From beside him, her voice soft, Bebe continued, "I know that you… feel very strongly about Tweek. You want to protect him, and you're upset, probably because no one else has protected him for years."
As another icy lump took up residence in his stomach, Craig grit his teeth together. Though he'd never put the feeling into words before, somehow, Bebe's calm statements drew the feeling from him without his conscious decision to let it slip. Stuffing his hands into his pockets, Craig admitted, "I'm upset that I watched him get put through hell for years and I never even thought twice about it." Drawing in a quick breath before letting it out slowly, the boy flatly said, "I never hurt him, but I never stopped anyone either. I wish I'd stood up for him sooner." Snorting bitterly, he added, "I had to fucking beat him up to see that I wanted to protect him."
"Sometimes it takes making a mistake to learn that there was a right way to go to begin with." Bebe's voice filtered Craig's conscious, making him grit his teeth harder and suddenly pull his hands out of his pockets so he could press back against the pressure that had suddenly formed behind his eyes. As he rubbed his face vigorously, the girl continued, "But you figured it out, didn't you?"
"I can't just punch him and make things better," Craig ground out, his usually monotone voice sounding uneven, even to his own ears. "I don't want to punch him and pretend that makes things better. At least then we were both angry, now…" His voice died away and he just made a helpless gesture. "What's wrong with me?"
"You're upset because the person that you care about doesn't need you as much as you need them." Craig sucked in a breath and held it, wishing he could make the pressure behind his eyes go away. Bebe's voice was so collected, which only made the Noirette more aware of how much of a mess he was. "You're upset because Tweek turned to Craig instead of you."
"You're right, I'm a selfish asshole," he muttered, his voice coming out oddly choked.
"Craig, you do know that most normal people feel like you do at some point in their life?" Bebe asked, her voice gentle. "Upset, because someone who meant something to them pushed them away? You're allowed to feel angry, you're allowed to be sad. Heck, it would be weird if you didn't!" Pulling his hands away from his eyes, Craig stared at Bebe, looking between her eyes as he tried to understand what she was saying. "But it's one thing to be upset about it, and it's another thing to act stupid because of it."
"I know he's allowed to have other friends, okay?" Craig pushed out, his breathing coming out shaky. "I know that he's not going to forget me or some shit, I know that I was the one who made him upset but it still… I still pisses me off." Desperation touching his voice, Craig asked, "What did I do to him?"
For once, Bebe didn't have an answer. "Honestly, I don't know Craig." Sighing, she said, "I think that there's a lot going on for him right now, and sometimes when emotions start running high, things are bound to break eventually."
"He doesn't like me dating you," Craig found himself saying, unable to keep his mouth shut. When Bebe's expression didn't change, he pulled down his chullo and muttered, "I don't know, that's the only thing I can think of. I didn't think he'd give a shit about this whole thing between us, but I can tell it makes him upset, even though he tries to blow it off. I don't get why though, it's not like I'm going to forget him, he's… He's Tweek."
"I bet you know how he feels now," Bebe said lightly.
Hit with what she was saying, Craig's mouth fell open for a moment before he found his voice and muttered, "It fucking sucks."
"It does, especially when you can't do anything about it." The girl's laugh sounded almost sad. "He's probably not even upset with you, he just can't tell the difference between you and the situation we're all in."
Unexpectedly, a savage desire to tear something apart came over him and Craig's hand tightened till his knuckles went white. "Fuck everyone here. Fuck what they think we should and shouldn't do. You should have dated Clyde and they should have left me out of this." Even though he knew it was probably rude, he had to get it out before it drove him crazy.
"You're probably right." Turning sharply so he could stare at Bebe, he found the girl smiling ruefully at the sky. "But maybe this is one of those times that we have to make a mistake before we find the solution." Twisting her head to the side just enough to look Craig in the eyes, the blond-haired girl said, "Maybe, we're going to have to wait for those emotions to explode before we can find out what the right thing to do is."
"I still want to go after him," Craig told Bebe frankly.
"I know you do, but this time, you have to wait till he comes to you." When Craig just stared at her, his mouth a terse line, Bebe sighed. "Look, come and play nice with Cartman and then when we're done, we can leave. I'm pretty sure I can make something up to get us out of here. Then we can text him and if he wants to talk to you, then you can go find him, alright?"
Puffing out a breath, Craig attempted to stand a little straighter. "Fine," he muttered. It wasn't what he wanted, but he knew at the same time that it was the best thing to do.
"Good, now come on, let's go make the Grand Wizard calm down." Taking his arm carefully, in that pristine way she treated most everything about this relationship, Bebe stepped forward into the light, pulling Craig after her. Even though he didn't exactly feel much better, and even though there was still that pressure behind his eyes, Craig knew that he was probably doing better than Tweek, so he should suck it up and pull himself together. Sure, it felt like something inside of him was ripping apart as he stepped out of the shadows, something that he needed to stay alive, but it was probably just his imagination. It was just irrational jealousy, something everyone felt at some point.
It didn't matter if his insides felt hollow, it didn't matter that he felt dead. He'd be fine, it was Tweek who deserved to be upset, he would be fine. The pressure behind his eyes would probably go away eventually, and Tweek would talk to him later. And if he didn't… Well, then Craig would get over himself because he had fucked up and the situation was bad and thinking about it wasn't going to make it better. It was stupid to want to break down into tears, he was Craig Tucker and he wasn't going to be a fucking baby about it.
Things would get better, right?
At least he'd have something to distract himself with in the meantime.
