An Unhealthy Escape
Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter, Snape would never have died!
A/N: Hello! Another update! Thank you for all the amazing feedback I have received for this story, I really do appreciate it! I do personally reply to any reviews that I get (from people with accounts, as I can't reply to those without accounts obviously) and I am glad to hear that people like my story. Hop you enjoy! Milo.
Chapter 13
"Harry, it's alright, you're not in trouble," Remus assured Harry, who was currently sitting nervously on the loveseat in the drawing room. The only thing keeping him together was that Ginny was sitting next to him, holding one of his hands in both of hers.
Harry had known that Sirius and Remus were going to make him talk to them. After all, they had found out that he was hurting himself, and then after he had told them he had stopped they found him unconscious on the bathroom floor with blood everywhere, not to mention Sirius had seen some of the scars and welts from the abuse he received from his Uncle. Of course he hadn't seen all of them; no he had covered everything he could with a glamour charm, but he wasn't that skilled at it yet, but all of the bruising and most of the scars and wounds on his back were covered when Sirius saw him. Nothing could cover the self-harm scars though. He was just thankful the wards on Grimmauld Place prevented the Ministry from detecting underage magic.
"Harry, we are seriously getting worried about you. We have tried to get you to talk to us, but you refuse. You wake up from nightmares at least once or twice a night," said Sirius. Harry could tell that both of them were worried. He hated himself for worrying them, but he couldn't survive without cutting. He needed it.
"I haven't woken up screaming once this week," Harry told them. Remus rolled his eyes and Sirius snorted.
"Harry, you've been unconscious for the last four days, and I walked into your room a few days before the… incident because I was wondering why you hadn't woken anyone up in a few days, and I saw you thrashing around in your bed. You put silencing charms around your bed." Sirius gave Harry his best I'm-Not-Fooled glare, and Harry sighed in defeat.
"Fine, so the nightmares haven't stopped. I doubt you can make them stop. I've been trying for who knows how many years now," Harry told them; he was getting quite frustrated. He really hated talking to people about himself. At least they were just talking about nightmares. That was pretty easy. He wasn't looking forward to explaining to them why Ginny had found him on the bathroom floor, passed out because of severe blood loss.
"You will be taking a dreamless sleep potion every night from now on, at least until you stop looking like one of those zombies from those muggle horror films," Remus said sternly, leaving no room for argument. Harry nodded glumly.
"Ginny, I will have to talk to your mother and father, but I think you should do the same," Remus said turning to the young witch curled up next to Harry. Ginny sighed, realizing that if they went to her mother, she would definitely agree. Ginny hated dreamless sleep potions. They were disgusting.
They sat in silence for a few seconds. Sirius, of course, was the one to break it.
"Harry, take off your shirt," he demanded suddenly. Harry paled immediately, the little color in his face completely disappearing. Remus looked at Sirius as if he had lost his marbles, and Harry assumed Sirius hadn't told him about that particular discovery yet. Harry shut his eyes tight. Maybe, if he just imagined he wasn't there he would open his eyes and he would be back in his bedroom with his blade. He opened his eyes. No luck.
"No, I'm not taking off my shirt," Harry whispered, his eyes wide with fear. He definitely did not want to talk about this. His Uncle had threatened to kill him if he ever showed anyone. Maybe he should just tell them see, and let his Uncle kill him if he wanted to. He was starting to think that death was surely preferable to life. If not, what was the point of living through this torture? The gut wrenching pain that never left, only tamed temporarily by the pain that came from cutting himself. The heart breaking guilt that plagued him every day he lived knowing he had caused people to die. Innocent people like Cedric and his parents. Harry decided he hated life.
"Harry, you have to show them. Please," Ginny whispered in Harry's ear. Sirius smiled gratefully at her. If anyone could get Harry to do something he didn't want to, it was Ginny. She didn't know it yet, but she had Harry wrapped around her skilled fingers and eating out of the palm of her hand.
Harry stood up, shaking from head to foot. His throat constricted, and the air around him grew heavy; it was getting very hard to breathe. He heard someone call his name in the distance, but he couldn't focus on the voice. He collapsed to his knees, not hearing or seeing anything around him. Then, all of a sudden, he could hear everything; every time someone screamed his name in concern, every footstep on the cold wooden floors, every slam of the door and single one of his panicked breaths. He was surprised that he could hear all of this over the thudding in his ears and chest. He felt someone force him to swallow something that tasted vile and found himself calming down. As his breathing evened, he could focus on the voices and what was happening around him. He looked up and saw Ginny in front of him, her small hands on either side of his face.
"Ginny," he whispered. Ginny looked at him with concern and worry shining through her warm, chocolate colored eyes. Harry finally calmed down. He saw Sirius and Remus standing a few feet away, watching him.
"I'm sorry Harry," Sirius said. "I didn't know that you would panic. But you do need to show us."
"Remus was watching the scene with confusion. Why would Sirius want harry to take his shirt off? Sirius' tone had reminded him of when they were in second year and James had demanded the same thing of Sirius. When Sirius took his short off, they found scars and bruises from his parents' abuse covering his back. That couldn't have happened to Harry… could it? No. That was impossible.
"Harry, it's alright, we gave you a calming draught, and you'll be fine. I know you don't want to, but you can't keep this to yourself. You just can't. You need to show Remus." Ginny told him. "And you need to do it without the glamours," she added. Harry looked at her in amazement.
"How did you know I was wearing glamours?" He asked, bewildered. Ginny frowned for a minute.
"I don't know. I just… knew," she told him. "Anyway, that's not the point, you need to take the charms off and then take your shirt off," she told him firmly. Harry sighed, realizing that he wasn't going to get out of this. If he didn't show them, Sirius would probably tie him to a chair and force him, or do something else equally ridiculous. He could be a little melodramatic at times, and was especially good at overreacting when it came to his godson's safety.
Harry stood slowly and removed his red Gryffindor Quidditch shirt. Remus gasped when he found he could count each and every one of Harry ribs through his skin. He looked like he had been starved. Harry turned around to show him the welts on his back from the belt that his basic glamours wouldn't hide. Remus gasped again. Harry had been abused. He had suffered at the hands of his stupid muggle family, and he had never told anybody. No one had found out. Why did the kid seem to want to suffer through everything in silence? Didn't he know that they were only there to help him? But Remus knew Harry would never ask for help. He would see it as a sign of weakness.
"Harry, why did you not tell anybody? That looks really bad," Remus told him, his voice thick with emotion.
"I'm going to floo Albus. Enough is enough," Sirius told them.
"NO! Don't, please. I don't want him to know," Harry pleaded desperately.
"No. I fell for that shit last time Kid; I'm not doing it again. I can't let you suffer, and I will do anything within my power to help you. Even if you don't want me to." With that, Sirius walked out the door, shutting it behind him.
Harry threw his shirt back over his head and sat back down on the love seat, his head in his hands. Ginny went to sit down next to Harry, putting her arm around him.
"I'm going to go and talk to Albus when he gets here," Remus said, leaving them both in the drawing room on their own.
"Harry, I'm so sorry. I know this is upsetting you, but it is necessary. I think you know that Sirius, Remus and Dumbledore cannot just let you keep hurting like this. They can't let that vile man keep hurting you," Ginny told him. Harry nodded glumly. He looked up at Ginny and was again mesmerized by her eyes. If you looked really closely, you could see all different colors among the beautiful deep brown; gold, blue and green flecks decorated her beautiful irises, and Harry thought she may be the most beautiful person in the world.
"You're beautiful," harry said before he could stop himself. Ginny blushed a pretty pink color. Harry leaned in to kiss her again, this time he was less shy, more passionate, his lips moving more surely against her. Ginny wrapped her arms nightly around his neck, playing with the short hair at the back of his head. Harry's arms snaked around her waist, puller her closer to him. Harry wasn't sure how long they were kissing for when he heard footsteps and voices from down the hallway. The two teens pulled apart quickly.
"Ginny?" Harry asked shyly.
"Yes Harry?" Ginny looked up at him.
"I have one question to ask before everyone comes back in…" Harry's voice trailed off as he gathered the courage for what he was about to ask. "Will you be my girlfriend?"
Harry didn't know why he was so nervous asking this question; perhaps because he felt that his whole existence depended on her answer. Ginny gave him a dazzling smile and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips.
"I would love to be your girlfriend Harry," Ginny answered, trying to hide her blush behind a shining curtain of long crimson hair. Harry tucked the hair behind her ear before pulling away from her just in time for the door to open. Sirius walked in to the room, closely followed by Remus, Dumbledore, Madam Pomfrey and Snape. Harry wondered what in the name of bloody Merlin Snape was doing here. He really did not have to talk about this in front of Snape. They guy hated him!
"Harry, Ginevra," Dumbledore said gravely, surveying them both over his half-moon spectacles. Harry gave him a nod and he conjured a large armchair and took a seat. Sirius, Remus and Madame Pomfrey all took a seat on the long couch while Snape took the remaining armchair in the corner, furthest away from everyone.
"Alright mutt, why are we here?" Snape drawled looking at Sirius. Sirius growled at him.
"I don't know why the bloody hell Dumbledore asked you here, but the rest of us are here for Harry," Sirius said. Snape rolled his eyes back at Sirius.
"Princess Potter stubbed his toe? Or did he bump his head walking down the stairs?" Snape asked snidely. Harry could tell that Ginny was getting angry, so he put his hand over hers in an attempt to calm her down. It didn't work.
"You don't know him," she snarled in the direction of Snape. "You don't know anything about him, because all you see is his father's face and hair, and you treat him like dirt just because he looks like someone you didn't like as a child." Everyone stared at her in shock. Not many people knew how fiery and feisty little Ginny Weasley really could be when she was mad. They were utterly astounded that she had dared to stand up to Snape of all people.
"How dare you?" Snape growled, clearly angry at being disrespected by a student.
"That is quite enough. I'm sure that we can sort out any problems later. We have more pressing issues at the moment," Dumbledore said in his annoyingly calm voice. Snape snarled at the headmaster, clearly frustrated. Harry discreetly wrapped his arm around Ginny waist in an attempt to try to calm her down. She glared at Snape one final time before turning to face Professor Dumbledore.
"I have sent a patronus to Minerva, and she should be arriving any- ahh Minerva, just in time," Dumbledore smiled at his colleague as she walked through the door. Dumbledore conjured up an armchair identical to his and place it in between his chair and the couch.
"Sorry I'm late, I had urgent business to attend to elsewhere," she said before sitting down.
"No need for apologies my dear Minerva, like I said you are just in time," Dumbledore smiled. Harry was getting rally frustrated now. Why were all these people here? He was nervous enough about talking to Dumbledore, let alone Professor Snape and Madame Pomfrey. Professor McGonagall wasn't too bad he guessed. She was always a decent teacher and he knew she cared a lot about her lions.
"Now, Mr. Potter, Mr. Black has told me that you have some things you need to talk about with us today," Dumbledore said in that infuriatingly calm tone, as if he were merely commenting on the weather.
"No, I'm not doing this," Harry said flatly. He stood up and walked to the door to find it locked. "Let me out of here," he growled, not turning around.
"Now Harry, come sit down and we can discuss this together," Dumbledore said. Harry's eyelids fluttered closed before opening again, as if he were desperately trying to control his anger and annoyance.
"Let me out," he said again.
"No Harry. This is a serious issue and it needs to be addressed properly, now come sit down please," replied Dumbledore. Everything in the room shuddered for a moment, and the glass in the cabinets cracked loudly.
"Harry," Sirius warned. "Come on, I know you don't want to do this. I know it's hard. Trust me Kid I know exactly how you feel. My parents weren't exactly that pleased when I became the only Gryffindor in the Noble House of Black. Didn't you ever wonder why I left home and ran to your Dad's house when I was sixteen?" Sirius asked. Harry paused for a moment; he couldn't imagine Sirius running from his parents because they hurt him. He didn't want to imagine it. Sirius was always so brave, so strong. He was his rock; even though that sounded very clichéd it was true.
Harry didn't move for over a minute. He felt a small, warm hand close around his larger and start to pull him back towards the couch. He didn't resist, he just let her drag him back over to everyone and push him back down into his seat.
"Potter don't you think you're getting a bit old to be causing earth tremors and cracking cabinets?" asked Snape, amused by the teens clear annoyance and frustration at the situation.
"Now, now, Severus, that is enough," Dumbledore interrupted. "Harry my boy, why don't you tell us why we are here?" Dumbledore asked quietly.
"I'd rather not," Harry replied quickly. Sirius and Remus both shot him warning glances. Ginny whacked him on the arm. His left arm.
"OW!" Harry yelled before he could stop himself. Ginny's hands flew up to cover her mouth when she realized what she'd done.
"Oh Harry, I'm sorry! I didn't realize! Are you alright?" She asked him, her eyes filled with worry and guilt.
"I'm fine, don't worry about it. Didn't hurt that much anyway," He reassured her gently. Ginny nodded, and after mumbling another apology turned back to face the headmaster again. Dumbledore watched the scene quietly, concern lining his face.
"Harry, why don't you roll up your sleeve," suggested Dumbledore gravely. All the color in Harry's face drained, and he looked up at the headmaster with wide, scared eyes.
"I'd really rather not. A bit cold in here you know, I don't want to catch something," Harry lied smoothly. He had become quite skilled at the art of deceit in the last few years. He found it came naturally to him; he wasn't sure if he should be worried or pleased, but at that moment he decided to go with pleased.
"Harry, I think you know full well that you are not getting out of this," commented Remus in an irritatingly calm tone reminiscent of Dumbledore's. Harry scowled at him before turning his glare on the headmaster.
"Again I ask, why are we here? It seems the Potter brat does not want to tell us whatever is wrong with him so can we leave?" asked Severus.
"Alright, that is it. I don't know why you're here, I certainly didn't ask for you to be here and Harry certainly didn't ask for you to be here. Apparently Albus thinks that you could be of some help, Merlin only knows bloody why, so you can just shut your mouth or leave us in peace!" Sirius yelled at Snape. Snape's expression did not change from his cold, sneering mask.
"I would love to leave, but I have been told I am not permitted to do so," Snape said, giving Albus a cold glare. Dumbledore just chuckled.
"Boys that is enough. Harry needs our help-" Dumbledore started, but he was interrupted by a very angry Harry.
"I do not need anyone's help! I am perfectly fine, why can't you people just leave me the hell ALONE?!" He yelled at them. Snape raised an eyebrow at his outburst.
"BECAUSE THE LAST TIME WE LEFT YOU ALONE, YOU ALMOST KILLED YOURSELF!" Ginny screamed at him.
"BECAUSE YOU'RE ONE TO TALK! I WOKE UP THIS MORNING TO FIND YOU WEARING LONG BLOODY SLEEVES AGAIN!" The two teens were now standing facing each other.
"YOU ARE SUCH A BLOODY HYPOCRITE! YOU CANNOT TELL ME WHAT TO DO! I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT; IT'S MY BODY IM NOT HURTING ANYBODY ELSE! I DON'T SEE WHY YOU BLOODY CARE!"
"WELL THEN IF YOU THIK THAT'S TRUE, WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME FOR HURTING MYSELF? IM NOT HURTING ANYBODY ELSE! AND OF COURSE I CARE THAT MY GIRLFRIEND IS HURTING HERSELF! ARE YOU MAD?" The six adults watched their yelling match in amusement. Even Snape had to hold back a laugh at the two teens. Sirius thought they were so much like Lily and James. Hopefully though they didn't fight quite as much as they did, otherwise everyone would be deaf by the end of the year.
Harry and Ginny stood there fuming at each other for a few more minutes, before Ginny flung herself back down onto the small couch. Harry followed cautiously; he had never experienced her infamous bat-bogey hex first-hand before, and he didn't really fancy it. After a few seconds, the two seemed to forget they were mad at each other, and Ginny continued tracing comforting patterns on the back of Harry's hand. The adults sat there watching them, waiting for more screaming. When none came Dumbledore spoke again.
"Alright, now that we have got that out the way," Dumbledore said looking pointedly at the two teens who both blushed bright red. "Let us continue our meeting. Harry, please roll up your sleeves. Miss Weasley, I think you should do the same," Dumbledore said. Both of them looked at each other. There was no way they were going to do that. But it didn't look like they would have much of a choice.
A/N: I am not very happy with this chapter, and I was struggling a bit with writer's block, but oh well. I hope you enjoyed it! Please leave a review telling me what you think! Milo.
