Tweek
Tweek wasn't sure what he was supposed to think, but he was starting to wonder if not thinking was a safer bet.
He was still trailing behind Craig, having found no will to move even after the conversation he'd overheard (and butted into), but part of him wished he could get anywhere else but there. It was everything at this point, all of the singular moments that were starting to pile up to the point of obscuring his thoughts. Every time he was sure of something, he found another reason to be unsure of it. Somewhere, it had started to become a vicious cycle.
And it all centered around Craig. Jesus, why does everything do that? It can't be healthy. But when had he ever been healthy?
He had no idea anymore where he stood when it came to Craig. Every time he thought he'd finally gotten it all figured out, something else got in his way and threw everything sideways. Tweek had been sure that Craig hated him and was happy without him, but then Kenny showed up saying that he wasn't happy with Bebe and he was trying to make things right. When Tweek had gone to rescue Craig, there had been that flash of joy at seeing him that had crossed the Noirette's face, but then Craig had closed off because clearly, he didn't actually want Tweek around, he'd just forgotten in the heat of the moment.
And yet he'd just been handed irrefutable proof that neither Craig nor Bebe wanted to be dating each other. It was one thing to not trust Craig, especially after how many times the boy had made promises that he hadn't kept, but it was another to disregard what Token said. The boy only dealt in logic and facts, Tweek would have to be stupid to notbelieve him.
But… But it all hurts, and I don't know what I'm supposed to believe. Hugging his arms around his chest for a moment, Tweek gave a hard twitch before throwing his shoulders back. NO! I have to be strong! I can't let Craig see how pathetic I really am, I'm done letting him control my emotions! Tweek wished he could actually mean that and not just use it like a useless record that kept scratching over the same broken chords.
Suddenly, the murmuring that had been taking place at the front of the troup stopped, and Tweek's head jerked around so he could see what was going on. Realizing that everyone was huddling up behind a bush, Tweek reluctantly followed, grabbing for his frying pan as he did so. At least we'll be fighting, right? Then I won't have to think about it anymore. Just for a little while anyways.
But of course, he ended up next to Craig. Focusing on Token's cape instead of the taller boy crouching beside him, Tweek bit down on his lip hard, holding back any traitorous sounds that might have escaped otherwise. It's like the world hates me. Well, that wasn't exactly anything new, was it? Shivering, Tweek dragged his attention towards Cartman, who was saying something at that moment. Jesus, why did he come with us?! He never comes with us!
It was probably indicative of a bigger issue, but for the life of him, Tweek couldn't figure out what it was.
"There it is," Cartman was saying softly, dramatically. "The Inn of the Giggling Donkey." Remembering the many times he'd been in there before, in the past with Craig at his side, but in more recent days with other boys at his shoulder, Tweek clenched the hand clasped around the handle of his frying pan a little tighter and tried to ignore the way that Craig glanced down at him. Why can't he make up his mind? WHY DOES HE ACT LIKE THIS!? I HATE IT I HATE IT I WANT OUT!
"Token, Paladin Butters, are you sure the Bard is hiding out there?" Cartman asked, looking between the two boys. Token simply nodded once, his movements as smooth as ever. Of course he was certain, Tweek couldn't recall a time when he hadn't been certain about something. I wish I could act like that, I wish I could be sure of myself…
"From what I could gather, yes," Token commented, before turning to look at the Inn again. Tweek could hear the sounds of laughing boys from where he stood, and it reminded him of the silence that used to fall when Craig and he stepped into a room together. Remember when we were intimidating? Remember when people used to stop and stare? It had been a while, hadn't it?
Butters let out a squeak, interrupting Tweek's rambling train of thought. "Ah, well, that's what Twitter says," the boy insisted, looking at Cartman with worried eyes. Though Tweek didn't pretend to be good at reading people, he could tell the Paladin was rattled by Cartman's presence slightly, probably because the fat Wizard never went on missions like this with them normally.
Rolling his eyes and letting out a loud huff at Butters' words, Cartman thumped his glowing staff against the ground and snapped, "Carrier Raven, Butters!"
Quickly jumping backwards, Butters put his hands up and stuttered, "S-sorry-sorry, that is w-what the Carrier Raven says!" From behind him, Kenny pulled a face that was mostly concealed by pink lace and Cartman sighed, as if disappointed. It all felt like a play, like someone was handing them a script and forcing them to read from it. Did they all get a script and I didn't? Is that why everything is so awful? Because this is all just some big play and I'm not doing it right?
Shaking himself, Cartman turned towards Tweek, Craig and Token, causing the blond to let out a yelp. Oh jesus, I don't have my lines! WHAT DO I SAY!? He was about to back up when something happened that took him by surprise.
Craig stepped forward a foot and flipped Cartman off easily. It was an action that would have better fit with the boy's personality ages ago. Hell, Tweek couldn't even remember the last time he'd seen Craig flip someone off in quite that expressionless, instinctive nature. It definitely made Cartman do a double take, and he shuffled back a step before clearing his throat and saying, "Ah, Feldspar, Tweek, you two guard the back door. Token, Butters, Princess Kenny, let's go inside."
Though Tweek's fingers itched to yank at his hair, the boy gave a violent shudder and nodded, pretending like these orders didn't phase him in the slightest. Obviously, they didn't affect Craig, the boy simply tucked his hand beneath his cloak once more and tipped his chin back, as if deliberately avoiding Tweek's gaze.
Looking between Craig and Cartman, Token tapped his foot twice. "A plan would be better," he told Cartman frankly, his gaze level.
Cartman groaned. "We don't have time for plans, Token. We have to get the Stick back now." Before the Cleric could say another word to him, the Wizard turned pointedly and pushed past Butters and Kenny so he could head for the door. Butters followed him quickly, nervously in Tweek's opinion. The Princess gave Token a meaningful raised brow before turning as well and floating along behind the retreating pair.
"Be ready for anything," Token instructed Tweek and Craig at last. Letting out a soft sound that he attempted to turn into a growl, Tweek screwed up his face into a determined scowl that was sort of ruined by the fact he couldn't stay in control of his features for more than a few seconds at a time. Eyes fixing on Tweek, Token was silent for a long moment before adding, "If all goes well, we won't need you two to intervene."
As if the matter was settled, Token twisted around and followed after Kenny, his strides purposeful and calm.
Waiting a beat, Tweek jumped when he realized that the other boys had already disappeared inside and he was just standing there doing nothing. Oh god! Leaping into action, Tweek barrelled towards the house, attempting to keep low so that he wouldn't be spotted by anyone that happened to be looking out the windows. Behind him, there was the crunch of boots on pavement and Tweek felt Craig's eyes boring into the base of his skull. "Ngh- JESUS!" he squeaked, before slapping a hand over his mouth, stifling any further sounds.
The Inn of the Giggling Donkey was actually Jimmy's house. Tweek knew that, in a far corner of his mind, and yet his thoughts seemed to transform the place into some creaking pile of wood and thick, cloudy windows. Sticking close to the building, grateful for the heat that seemed to leak out of it around the seams, Tweek kept his eyes on the ground. From experience, he knew that back door was near the back corner of the house, so he just kept walking, moving around the decorative bushes as he was required.
Once he'd reached that corner however, Tweek remembered that Craig was behind him and quickly scurried around it, pressing himself to the wall. Predictably, tellingly perhaps, Craig stopped just short of the corner and didn't come into view. The only sign he was there were the long, slow breaths that left tell-tale trails of condensation in their wake.
Shuddering, Tweek took a step back before looking around, lost. Here, he couldn't hear anything from inside, and it made him feel blind. Bad enough that he was with Craig, he also had to be outside. Reaching for his hair, Tweek let out an involuntary sound before forcing himself to grip his forearms and chench his teeth. It'll be fine, he's over there, I'm over here. It's fine.
Amazing how effective a mere corner could be in separating two people who didn't want to talk.
Sinking to the ground, Tweek drew in a shuddering breath and stared at the new grass attempting to poke its way through the gaps in the matted dead above it. He kept waiting for the sounds of screams or fighting or something, but if it was there, he couldn't hear it over his own roaring thoughts. What is he thinking? What is he doing? He probably doesn't even notice that I'm here! Why would he, I'm nothing but a nuisance.
The clear image of Bebe laughing awkwardly as she brushed the mood ring further into a drawer appeared in Tweek's mind.
"Fucking stupid, isn't it?"
Tweek smacked his head on the siding of Jimmy's house as he jerked it up in shock.
"I mean, here we are outside of one of our friend's houses, getting ready to ambush him, all because some fat kid in a bathrobe told us to." Craig sounded bitter, his voice came from somewhere above Tweek and it made the blond shiver even as he turned his face slightly towards the source of the voice.
"The fucking Stick of Truth doesn't even do anything. It's just a stick." It was stupid, but when he couldn't see Craig's face, Tweek didn't feel like he had to run from the boy's words. All he had to do was close his eyes and his mind conjured up a perfect picture of Craig, face flat, eyes narrowed slightly, arms crossed across his chest. Though he'd never be able to touch that image, Tweek felt like if he reached out, he just might.
"Do we even know why we're doing this?" Craig asked, his even voice conveying frustration.
"B-because it's fun?" Tweek found himself answering, his words ringing hollow. It wasn't really fun, but it had once been, and that's what he wished he could go back to. The joy, the smiles, the laughter, the rush of a battle and the satisfaction of a victory. Hell, even the devastation of a loss was preferable to this.
Craig snorted, almost like he could read Tweek's thoughts. "Yeah, it used to be, didn't it?" Somehow, Tweek expected Craig to launch into why things had changed, so when he didn't it made Tweek's eyes fly open and his head jerk around so he could stare in the direction he knew the Noirette was. Do I have to say something? What am I supposed to even say? No one tells me these things!
Before he could clamp his mouth shut, Tweek burst out, "I used to -ngh- love this game!" Feeling stupid, a common sinking in his stomach, Tweek continued, "Things got so s-screwed up, but -ghn- Jesus I think there wasn't any otherwayforit t-to go!" He said it, and instantly he knew it was true. Sure, he felt like he'd said it before, but saying it now made it feel real. Everything felt unnecessarily real, down to the dead grass under his fingers and the soft breathing of Craig.
Those breaths hitched. Silence descended, and Tweek wished it didn't have to feel so deafening. "Not really," the boy said at long last, his breathing returning to normal. "You know, we keep saying that things got fucked along the way, but I think that's just because we're looking for it now. This shit started out screwed up."
Tweek twitched at the savage nature of Craig's words. "It got b-better," the blond ventured, before thinking of the past month and adding, "For a while…"
"But it didn't stay better," Craig muttered, and there was the sound of the boy shifting. Tweek could see him pulling his chullo lower over his forehead, the image so powerful it made his heart ache. "Which is why it was all just a load of bullshit from the beginning."
Unsure what he was supposed to say to that, Tweek simply drew his knees against his chest tighter and twitched, his movements rattling the siding minutely. From inside the house, he suddenly became aware of the sounds of yelling, but he paid them no heed. Neither, for all intents and purposes, did Craig. I'm talking to him, Tweek realized suddenly. For the first time in days, I'm talking to him. And it doesn't hurt as much as it probably should.
"Did I drag you into this?" Craig asked, suddenly, his flat words startling Tweek slightly. Oh god, what's he talking about?! But then the answer presented itself in the form of Craig clearing his throat and clarifying, "This mess, this game, did I drag you into it? Did you really only join because of me?" The way he said it, like he'd been worried about it for a while, made Tweek's breath catch lightly.
"Y-yeah," Tweek found himself admitting. At any other time he might have lied, attempted to convince Craig and to some extent himself that he'd joined for other reasons, but at that moment, he couldn't find it in himself to make something up. Still, he couldn't help but mumble, "I mean, I joined b-because of Clyde too! Jesus, I -rrr- really did want to play!" His fingers tightened in the patch of grass beside him. "But I wouldn't have done it if y-you hadn't been excited about it."
It felt like a weight had lifted off of his shoulders.
"I thought I was joining because of you," Craig said, bitterly almost. Tweek felt like he should be screaming, but he wasn't sure why, so he held his tongue and kept listening. "I was so fucking careful, but I think I pushed you into it anyway."
"I wanted t-to be pushed into it," Tweek insisted, feeling his heart clench. "I'd -ngh- never do anything if it weren't f-for you." He half expected his usual anxiety to strangle him and his attempts at communication at any second, but somehow, he kept talking, saying things that he hadn't even been able to admit to himself. Something in him weakly protested that he should be angry with Craig right now, but he twitched and it was gone.
Craig was silent for another long moment, and Tweek could picture him working the blond's words over in his head. "I wish we'd just been mercenaries or something," Craig finally said in that collected deadpan. "Fuck everyone else, we would have been kickass without them."
Shivering, Tweek tried to imagine it, but for once, his mind failed him. All he found was the pit of cold that he'd somehow gotten out of for a few blessed moments. "Grrr- God, it's t-too late for that now, isn't it?" Tweek whimpered, weakly giving into his impulses and yanking his hair down over his ears. Instantly, he hated himself for bringing it up. It was so dumb, why had he said something like that? Why couldn't he have just kept quiet and been happy like that.
But then Craig snorted and bit out, "Yeah, I fucked that up, didn't I?"
Frustrated with himself more than anything, Tweek let out a growl before bursting, "JESUS I DIDN'T HELP!" Squeezing his eyes shut tight, Tweek found himself babbling out, "I mean -ngh- y-you didn't help, b-but stuff wouldn't have been so bad if I could have just said something instead of -rrr- k-keeping quiet and ignoring everything. I just d-didn't want anything to change."
"Things always change," Craig reminded the blond, resignedly. In those words, Tweek could hear the unspoken insistence that the Noirette had buried just beneath the surface.I didn't want things to change either, that silence said. I did everything I could to stop it, but in the end, I couldn't do shit.
We both avoided everything, Tweek realized, his heart thumping dully. We both screwed things up.
Not just Craig. Not just him. Both of them. It was always the two of them, together, inseparable no matter what kind of shit the ended up facing.
"You don't have to forgive me Tweek," Craig said at last, scattering Tweek's thoughts like so much sand. "Fuck, I haven't forgiven me," he added, his voice conveying just how much he meant those five words. It made Tweek ache, and yet he wasn't sure how he was supposed to break in and disagree. Not when he could practically taste how much Craig needed to say these words. "I'm not looking for you to forget, because you can't, and I'm not sure I can promise anything's going to change instantly, because I physically can't do that."
Craig dragged in a long, shaky breath. "But please let me have one thing."
"What?" Tweek asked.
It was like the very trees held their breath.
"Don't fight against me Tweek, just fight with me"
Suddenly, the air was cut by the sound of yelling. As Tweek shot to his feet, regretfully reminded of the fact that they still had a job to do and it wasn't to sit around, Craig muttered, "Speaking of bullshit…" Jerking around the corner, Tweek caught sight of Craig's cloak as he slipped in through the window of the basement.
"Jesus man, wh-where are you going!?" Tweek yelped, still all kinds of off-kilter from the conversation they'd just had. Turning to look at him, Craig caught Tweek's eyes and held them, entirely captivating him, just like he used to. It was like time stopped, and Tweek almost thought that if the Noirette kept this up, he wouldn't need the Stick to be all powerful.
"To help some idiots and Token," Craig finally said, his impossibly blue eyes calm. Lips twitching up slightly in the faintest memory of a smile, the boy waited for a beat before flatly informing Tweek, "And you're going to cover me from the other end." Then he slipped through the window, leaving the blond to let out a panicked screech before racing to the window and looking through it. Through the gloom, he was able to see Craig, on the ground holding his ankle and cursing a blue streak.
"Craig!" he yelped, forgetting about the game for a moment in favor of leaning precariously into the basement. They'd just made progress for Christ's sake! He wasn't about to lose that, not now, not after all of the torment he'd put himself through. From where he crouched, Craig's ankle looked horribly twisted, like it was broken. Oh god! Shaking his head, Tweek looked again, and all he saw was Craig chafing it. Jesus, I can't tell what's real and what isn't! When did I lose the ability to tell the difference!?
"Tweek." At the sound of Token's calm voice, Tweek jerked his head up, bumping it against the glass of the window. As he let out a loud cry of pain and massaged the back of his skull with shaking fingers, Token said, "Listen to me, I need you to go around to the front and wait for the signal."
"WHAT SIGNAL!?" Tweek shrieked, clenching his hands around the sill as the ground loomed in his vision. "JESUS WH-WHAT'S GOING ON!?"
"Th-the darn ol' Bard escaped us!" Butters exclaimed, hurring over to Craig. " 'e went upstairs b'fore we could catch 'im, b-but don't worry buddy, we'll get 'im soon!"
"Tweek, I think we might need you to attack from the front in a moment," Token told Tweek, before looking towards Craig and holding out a hand, muttering something that made golden light glitter at the tips of his fingers. When Tweek blinked, they vanished, and he realized that Token was just mumbling something random. Turning back to the blond, Token continued, "We'll be fine here. We're going to try and catch the Bard, but we might need you to distract the people upstairs so we can get by. Can you do it?"
Glancing down at Craig, who was getting to his feet, shaking Butters off of him, Tweek swallowed hard and nodded fervently. "Y-yeah!"
"Good," Craig said flatly, before Token could. "We're counting on you."
And that, to be honest, was all Tweek needed. Shimmying backwards and leaping to his feet, Tweek hurried around the house, no longer caring if someone saw him. From the house, which was starting to look more like an Inn and less like Jimmy's home by the second, Tweek could hear the clamoring of voices and the scraping of furniture. OH JESUS WHAT ARE THEY DOING?! Fumbling at his belt, Tweek unhooked his club and hefted it, feeling mildly comforted by the familiar weight. They were counting on him, Craig was counting on him. Tweek wasn't about to pretend that even after everything, that still meant something.
Oh sure, he knew that things were going to get awkward again, it was inevitable. Craig still hadn't forgiven himself and he'd admitted that things weren't going to change just yet. Tweek couldn't barrel into another bad decision, not after everything that had happened. Except it's Craig, and he isn't a bad decision. He didn't have any proof to back this up with, but Tweek didn't feel like he needed any. Because it was Craig.
There was the sound of shouting and combat from inside the house. Think later, fight now.
Racing around to the front, Tweek ran up the steps and let out a scream of frustration when he realized he was too short to see inside. Looking to the clouded glass of the windows to either side of him, Tweek let out a cry and just jumped, managing to catch a glimpse of the interior of the Inn. There! Craig was there, fighting several mercenaries and an Elf. The whole room had been turned into a maze of upended tables and barstools. JESUS I NEED TO GET IN THERE!
Seizing the doorknob, Tweek tried to open it, only to find it had been locked. Oh Jesus! This isn't good! Shaking his head, attempting to clear it, the Inn went back to a house and suddenly, Tweek saw it. The window, already cracked open. It wasn't an easy way in, but it was a way.
As reality warped around him, Tweek hung his club from his belt again before letting out a yell and leaping from the top step of the porch, hands outstretched. Managing to catch the windowsill, Tweek hoisted himself upward, fingers scrambling and heart pounding, until he managed to shimmy onto the thankfully wide ledge. Screeching as he almost pitched backwards into the bushes, Tweek caught ahold of the edge of the window and yanked up, throwing it open. Grabbing for his club, the blond didn't bother to think.
He just jumped.
Landing on an Elf, who went down with a yell, Tweek straightened and hit the first thing he saw over the head. It turned out to be the bartender. The boy went down instantly, and Tweek winced as his body hit the floor.
But then several other boys were converging on him and Tweek recognized Philip and several other rougher mercenaries among them. Readying his club, the blond let out a feral screech and laid into them, expending the energy that had been building up in his system for days. After talking to Craig, it was like all his emotions were allowed to flow out of him, making every swing more powerful, every attack more deadly. Cleaving through an Elven mercenary, Tweek stumbled back and attempted to take a breath, having expended far too much of his oxygen simply yelling nonsense.
"TWEEK!" At the sound of Craig's yell, Tweek's head whipped around and he only just managed to get his club up in time to stop the blade that had been aimed at his throat. Philip growled, and Tweek was sent tripping backwards as the boy shoved him.
"What the hell do you think you're doing here?!" the Elf yelled at him, his blade coming for Tweek once more. "This is Elven territory now. You Humans have no place here."
Screaming as the sharp, heavy blade got this close to cutting off his left arm, Tweek rolled to the side and screeched right back, "WE'LL M-MAKE OURSELVES A PLACE HERE THEN!" Catching the taller boy across the stomach with his club, Tweek threw all of his strength into the blow and managed to almost bodily lift Philip off his feet before sending him crashing through a tangle of bar stools.
"Fucking finally," Craig announced, coming through the wreckage, his blue eyes blazing with life. For a moment, Tweek thought he was seriously annoyed with him, but then he caught the gleam in the boy's eyes, and he found himself laughing in his usual, high-pitched way.
Behind Craig, Butters came through, helping the limping Cartman along. "Th-they took Princess Kenny!" the boy announced, his eyes wide and worried. "Quick, we 'ave to do somethin'!"
Token opened his mouth to say something, but he was cut off as more Elves poured in through the back door, their weapons already drawn. Changing what he'd been about to say, Token quickly ordered, "Craig, Butters, Cartman, get upstairs. We need to get to the Bard before they do."
"You go too!" Tweek found himself saying, drawing his short sword as he did so. "I'll hold them back."
"They won't know what hit them."
Craig's words, more than anything, inspired confidence in Tweek.
"No," he agreed, twitching hard to one side before grinning. "They w-won't."
Then he flew at his new opponents.
They were good, there was no denying it, but Tweek was a demon. There was nothing that could have saved them. Even without Craig at his side, Tweek put down Elves left and right. It helped, of course, that he was a higher level than them, but it wouldn't have mattered regardless. Each enemy was put down with the same quick, swift wrath that only he could deliver.
In the back of his head, he could hear Craig's voice, calmly telling him that he was doing a good job and it made Tweek feel like he might've been able to do anything, if given the opportunity. Stupid, yes, but Tweek never claimed to be smart. Swinging his sword with deadly accuracy and hitting anything that didn't go down with his club, Tweek cut through the attacking Elves like they were paper. At one point, golden light enveloped him and he thanked his lucky stars for Token, but for the most part, it was nothing but one long sheet of red.
Above him, he could hear the sounds of fighting, and it filled him with something like determination. He could picture Craig, a shadow with a sharp edge, a Thief who stole the breath right from your lungs, and it made him want to shout. This this was something he'd missed. It had been so long since he'd felt like he had Craig behind him, supporting him, and it was a feeling he never wanted to end. He didn't need to be protected, he was strong, he just needed Craig there to catch him when he was done being strong and put that fire in his bones that he couldn't find anywhere else.
Caffeine would never compare. This was pure adrenaline, liquid power in motion. Tweek might have been tired of the game, but he would never tire of this feeling.
Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately for the Elves, eventually Tweek ran out of things to hit. Twitching, wiping the sweat and blood off of his face but only succeeding in streaking it further, the blond jerked his head towards the stairs and hurried for them. Scaling them two at a time, Tweek came skidding into the other Humans, his weapons waving wildly.
"Tweekers, just the Barbarian I was hoping to see~" Kenny's dress was torn and his hair was a muss, but he still grinned when he saw Tweek. "I trust you dealt with the trash below."
"Ngh- YESIDID!" Tweek screeched, his wild eyes only looking for one person.
As if sensing who, Token calmly said, "Craig's in the attic right now, he's trying to get through to the Bard's room. He's got himself locked in there with magic that's too powerful for us to undo without the Stick in our possession." Looking up towards the ladder that was indeed protruding from the ceiling, Tweek leaped back and let out a growl.
Jesus he could die up there! Attics are so dangerous! But it was Craig, so he'd be fine. As if to prove this, there was the sound of Jimmy exclaiming, "Oh boy, I did n-n-n-not think of th-th- I didn't think of that!" A second later, the door opened and Tweek followed the other boys as they poured into the room.
"You've nowhere to run, Bard!" Cartman announced, pointing a meaty finger at Jimmy, who was still grinning as if this was all horribly amusing to him. "Give me the Stick of Truth!"
Waving about the Stick, almost mockingly, Jimmy tipped his head back and called, "Take it from me if you can, W-w-wizard K-king~" When Cartman hesitated, the boy rolled his neck and said, "Step forward now, and fulfill your de- d-de- Step forward now and f-fulfill your destiny!"
Clearly rankled by this, Cartman got in Jimmy's face, though he kept back as if afraid of the power the boy held. "You're no match for a Grand Wizard!" Cartman insisted, though Tweek thought that Jimmy looked much more menacing, glowing from inside like he was, filled with the power of the Stick of Truth.
"The Stick belongs with us," Jimmy told Cartman, getting closer to the boy and smirking challengingly. "I will not h-hesitate to use every p-p-p-power it has given me to to keep it from the hands of you filthy Humans."
"Fine, you wanna throw down brah," Cartman said, suddenly breaking character. Stepping to the side, the fat boy looked at Craig and Tweek, before smirking. "Tweek, Feldspar, kick his ass."
Wait, no! The fervor of battle drained from Tweek almost instantly at those words. Jimmy was his friend, or if not his friend then at least Craig's friend. He couldn't do something like that. It was obvious that Craig was having similar misgivings, given the way he backed up and furrowed his brows as if to say my hands are clean of this.
"Tweek, Craig," Cartman repeated, dropping Craig's fake name in his irritation. "I said, kick his ASS!"
"No," Craig said stoutly, flipping Cartman off. Even though he wasn't sure what made him do it or even if it was okay, Tweek stood shoulder to shoulder with Craig and nodded.
"Yeah!" And then, because he couldn't help himself, "F-fuck you Cartman!"
For a moment, Cartman's face just started to turn red, and Tweek was sure he was about to explode at them, but then Kenny shook himself free of Butters' supporting arm and said, haughtily Tweek thought, "Oh my god, sometimes a girl just has to do everything."
Before anyone could say anything, Kenny yanked down the front of his dress and Tweek yelped and closed his eyes, not really wanting to see something like that. Butters let out a similar cry of protest, and Craig swore angrily, but Jimmy made an appreciative sound that was quickly followed the the sound of something very hard hitting something that wasn't as hard as it was.
It was only once Tweek heard the clatter of Jimmy falling to the floor that he opened his eyes and found Kenny adjusting his dress once more and picking up the Stick, clearly pleased with himself. "Sometimes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do," he said matter o' factly, nodding once. "And sometimes, that means waving some tits around."
"Princess!" Butters squeaked, just as Cartman let out a strangled sound, as if he was caught between laughter and complete dumbfounded disbelief.
Naturally, it was Token who found his voice first. "Well, at least we have the Stick." Actually, Tweek would have been surprised if he'd been affected at all. This was Token they were talking about.
Pulling himself together, Cartman hurried forward and took the Stick from Kenny, giving the Princess a gracious smile as he did so. "Token is right, the Stick is ours!" Even though the last minute had drained most of his battle craze, Cartman's words still drew a cheer from Tweek that was echoed by the others. "Now, we must return to Kupa Keep and put the Stick back in its rightful place!"
But as Craig accepted the Stick from Cartman, and the other boys started to file out of the room, still excited over the battle, Tweek caught the smile the Noirette threw him, and he felt like the thing that had really been put back in its rightful place was his heart.
And that was an amazing feeling.
