"Her…that's the only thing I'm not used to" Jade said and they looked at each other not knowing how to take that comment.

"Did she go out?" Robbie asked.

"No, she was always with me" She informed. "We only got out two days ago for her birthday party"

"A party? Really?" Tori asked surprised and Jade nodded.

"Yeah but not what you're thinking, it was his kind of party…He brought cake and raped me on his sofa while she played on the carpet next to us" Jade said and they looked down baffled by her story, everything was so terrifying and disturbing that they only wanted to kill Scar.

"He didn't care she was there?" Andre asked and she shook her head.

"He told me either I took my clothes off or he would do it to her, he described what he imagined raping a baby would be like, that's how much he cares about her" Jade responded and their eyes wide opened. "I knew he would so I did it, one more time didn't make any difference…at least he didn't hit me as usual" She commented as she pointed at her bruises. "You know, he sometimes was so angry that he only came to the room to use me as punching bag and the sex was the bonus, it was his way to release tension I guess, I always knew what he would do…I could hear his breathing and the way he opened the door, I learned to read him like a book and I knew when he was upset so I just got ready to be beaten, other times I knew he just wanted to rape me and others I heard the other men's laughs as well so I knew it was 'party night', I don't know even know what was worse" she added sincerely and Beck was trying to keep himself together because he was holding the baby but he felt he would explode in rage.

"That animal" Mr. West said angrily and Jade nodded.

"But at least during the party I got the phone, she found it and I hid it in her" She informed and sighed. "I didn't believe this would be possible, I thought I would die in that room"

"But you didn't, you're back and that's what matters baby" Evelyn said.

"I guess, I don't know" Jade said sincerely.

"What do you mean? You wanted to get out, you needed to" Tori responded and Jade sighed.

"Did I? No, life ended for me a long time ago" Jade affirmed sadly and they felt their hearts breaking. "I did it for her, she still has a chance and I couldn't let that animal abuse her, that's why I called" she added referring to Rosie.

"Oh honey no, you still have a life ahead of you" Evelyn affirmed with a smile on her face but Jade didn't say anything, she only looked back at her emotionlessly and then Rosie started crying.

"Sh, sh, sh…it's okay, what's her name?" Beck asked. "It's okay, sh, sh…" He said sweetly as he swung her in his arms to calm her down.

"Rosie" Jade simply said and the baby saw her so she opened her little arms at her, she wanted to be held by her mother and Beck walked towards her but Jade didn't move, she simply stared at Rosie as she cried reaching for her.

"Jade, aren't you gonna hold you baby? She wants you" Tori commented but Jade only looked at her child coldly.

"No" She said and stood up. "I'm going to my room" she simply said and went upstairs while everyone stared at her surprised and the baby cried her eyes out trying to lean towards the stairs, she wanted to go with her.

"Give her to me" Evelyn said and held Rosie. "Sh, sh, sh…it's okay my love, it's okay"

"What's the matter with her and the baby?" Andre asked confused. "She is her mother, didn't she just say she wanted to save her?"

"Try to understand her, it's the product of her rape…and she had her while she was locked up in that room, being constantly abused, she connected the baby to her pain and she didn't want her in the first place" Tori commented sadly.

"Tori is right" Beck said. "She needs time"

"Or maybe we should give the baby up for adoption" Mr. West suggested. "My daughter has already been through enough pain, she doesn't need a constant reminder of it"

"I think that's an option too" Evelyn said. "But Jade has to decide it, just not now…when she is calm and the shock is gone"

"Will it ever be gone?" Cat asked sadly. "She doesn't seem too enthusiastic to live"

"She will be" She responded and looked at Rosie, who was now playing with the keys so Evelyn smiled, she looked just like Jade and Evelyn didn't see the product of a rape, she just saw her granddaughter.

Jade took a shower and went to bed, she was tired of everything and she just wanted to forget, she wanted to rest and wake up to her old life, she wanted to be happy but she felt she would open her eyes and find herself in the room again. The gang went home as well because they needed to rest and Evelyn took care of Rosie, they all needed that day to be over.

Next morning Jade woke up in her room so she exhaled relieved and smiled to herself, she changed into her clothes and went downstairs only to find her parents and her friends with Rosie in the kitchen. "Hey honey, how did you sleep?" Mr. West asked.

"Good" Jade simply said and opened the fridge, she finally could have breakfast after two years, back in the room she usually ate at night and he left her some snacks but nothing substantial.

Jade sat down on the table to eat her toast and Rosie saw her so she started calling her and opening her arms at her. "Come here…" Jade said and grabbed the baby from her father's arms so they all looked at each other surprised. "Do you want some milk? Is that it?" She asked Rosie and she smiled as she touched her mother's chest.

"You breastfeed her? I…I gave her formula last night" Evelyn said and Jade nodded.

"Yeah, I do…it was that or starving her" Jade responded and her mother gave her a blanket to cover herself while she fed Rosie. She simply held her with one arm and ate her toast with the other calmly so her parents didn't know what to think about her relationship with the baby anymore. "I missed breakfast" She commented.

"Right, you said he didn't feed you" Tori said.

"He only gave me food at night when he came to see me" Jade commented and enjoyed her toast. "This is so good" She said and they looked at her gladly but confused at the same time, she looked so natural and comfortable with her baby in that moment that they didn't know what to expect.

"Honey, you do know you can tell us anything right?" Evelyn asked after several minutes of silence and she remained emotionless.

"What's your point?" Jade asked back.

"Do you want Rosie to be with you? Do you love her?" Mr. West questioned. "We understand if you don't, you have every reason"

"I know" Jade said and Rosie had finished so she covered her breast and sat the baby on her lap.

"She is not guilty, you know that right?" Beck said.

"Yes and a lot of times I even feel I love her, I want to protect her and see her happy, she is only mine and it all feels good" Jade said smiling as she stroked her little head and sighed. "But others…I see her and I see them on top of me, I hear her and I hear them laughing and those times I just, I could kill her with my own hands and it would be so easy to just…" she said coldly as a tear streamed down her face and her hand surrounded Rosie's neck so they looked at her nervously.

"Jade…" Evelyn said in a warning tone because she felt Jade would break her neck in any second. "Jade, don't" her mother ordered seriously because it seemed she was starting to tighten her hand around it.

"What?" Jade asked as she moved her hand away from Rosie's neck and grabbed her little hand. "You thought I would kill her? You think I would do it?"

"Please don't even joke about that, she is a baby and she is your child" Tori said and Jade sighed.

"I know and I still tried once" She confessed and their eyes wide opened. "She was in the cradle crying and she wouldn't stop, I had a headache, I begged her to shut up but she didn't listen so I grabbed the pillow and covered her face with it"

"What?" Beck asked shocked and she looked at him emotionlessly.

"Are you surprised? Really?" Jade asked back almost cynically. "After what you've seen me do?"

"It's different, she is innocent and she is a baby, did you really do it?" Beck asked and she nodded.

"Yeah I did but I regretted it, I threw the pillow away and I…hated myself for it, I felt the need to protect her from my own demons, it's sad to think I had to protect her from myself but I did" She admitted and sighed "I held her in my arms and she finally stopped, she listened to me…there was a connection for a moment" Jade said and smiled a little as she looked at the baby.

"So you do want her?" Cat asked and she thought about it.

"I don't know, I wished for her to die before she was born and even after, I begged Scar to take her away many times but he never listened, he wanted me to take care of her as a reminder of our 'love' so there were times I couldn't even look at her" She commented sincerely. "But things change and she is mine after all, right?"

"But you don't have to keep her if you don't want to" Her father said and she thought about it.

"I'll think about it, today I do…maybe tomorrow I won't, but today she is mine" Jade said and smiled. "Anyway, what's gonna happen to Scar?"

"Prison for life" He informed.

"I want you to pay someone inside, I want him to be gang raped every single day, I want him to beg for death, I want him to know hell" Jade said calmly as she played with the baby and they all looked at each other uncomfortably but they agreed he had to suffer.

"I am already taking care of that, my love, he will pay for your suffering" Her father said and she nodded.

"Good, tell them to tell him it's from Lily" Jade said. "That's how he called me, he said he was nostalgic about our first night and I want him to never forget it" she added angrily.

"He won't" Her father affirmed.

"But dad, this won't last forever…" She commented and took a breath as she smiled to herself. "Let him have that for a few months at least and then I want you to bring him to me" Jade said.

"What? Why?" He asked.

"You know why" She said and Beck sighed.

"You don't have to keep doing this" He said.

"Becoming a serial killer? Are you still scared?" Jade asked coldly and he shook his head.

"I am sorry I said that and no I'm not believe me, I want to kill him as much as you do but you don't need more hatred in your life, let prison take care of him, you don't have to put more blood in your hands" Beck responded.

"Oh I do, now more than before…he has to die by my hand and it will be very slow, I've fantasized about it for two years, no one will take that away from me" Jade informed and they couldn't even say she was wrong, that man deserved all the pain in the world.

"Honey, this revenge is consuming you" Evelyn said sadly.

"What they'll go through in prison is enough, don't you think?" Tori asked.

"No, it's not enough…He destroyed my life, he killed me inside and made left me unable to feel anything other than hatred, he gave me a child I cannot love and he was going to rape her, he deserves to die the most horrible death and I have to be there, my face will be the last thing he sees" Jade said full of rage and looked at her father. "Promise me"

"Jade, I can't promise you that" He said but she kept looking at him. "But I'll try, I will do what I can I promise" he added and she nodded.

"Good"

Jade spent the following two weeks trying to get used to her life again, she'd missed it but being there felt strange to her after all that time, she'd initially thought it would make her happy but she felt plain miserable all the time, she couldn't even enjoy her freedom.

Evelyn, Mr. West and the gang had been really supportive of Jade all that time, they knew she wasn't alright but it was normal so they tried to make her feel better, they tried to make her feel home. They also spent a lot of time watching Rosie because Jade had ignored her most of that time, she sometimes would smile at her or hold her for a few minutes but she always seemed distant and they feared she would hurt the baby at some point but she never did, she simply didn't know how to handle the situation, she didn't know if she would ever be able to take care of her, she didn't even feel stable enough to live her life.

One night Jade was just in her room looking out the window, she remembered she liked doing that before she was kidnapped but now she couldn't feel anything, she looked at the sky and could only remember the nights when Scar chased her in the field and raped her, she looked at the moon and heard his voice in her head, she looked at the stars and heard her own cries; she just couldn't help it, she wasn't in the room anymore but the memories and the pain were still with her.

"I can't do this anymore…" Jade whispered to herself as a tear streamed down her cheek and she took a breath, she went into her bathroom and opened the mirror revealing a bunch of different pill tubes. She closed it again and looked at herself in the reflection as endless tears flowed down her cheeks and flashbacks of all her pain fulfilled her head, it was time to make a decision, it was time to end the pain.


Dun dun duuuun, do you think she'll do it?

I know it's sad but realistically she wouldn't just be okay after everything she went through.

PLEASE REVIEW! :)