"I promise" Jade said and he smiled.

"I would love to hug and kiss you right now but I have a hole in my tummy and you do too so that will have to wait" He commented and she laughed so he did too. "Oww…don't make me laugh" He said in pain and she smiled as she shook her head.

"You're an idiot" Jade said and he smiled at her.

"Look who's talking" He responded sarcastically and she rolled her eyes as she shook her head so the gang and her parents laughed; it all had turned out well in the end.

Beck and Jade had to spend some days in the hospital and then in recovery but after several weeks they were back to normality "Hey, how are you feeling?" Beck asked Jade as he sat down next to her, it was a Saturday and everyone was reunited in the living room.

"I'm okay" She said and gave him a little smile but he knew she was still sad.

"I think we should go shopping, Rosie needs some new clothes" Evelyn suggested as the baby played with Cat and Tori.

"Yeah, she does" Jade responded and simply stared at her, Rosie was learning how to walk so Tori aimed her at Jade and Rosie started toddling towards her.

"Go to mommy" Tori said sweetly as she carefully made sure Rosie didn't fall but let her walk.

"She is so cute" Cat said smiling as they all saw the tiny baby trying to walk from one sofa to the other but Jade wasn't smiling, she was just there watching her.

"Grab her, she's struggling" Tori said but Jade remained immobile just seeing her, Rosie finally got to Jade and put her little hands on her mother's knees to stay balanced, then she looked up at her face and smiled like trying to get her approval after her accomplishment. Rosie's smile was so pure and full of innocence that it completely disarmed Jade, she couldn't resist it, she looked at her and lots of tears started streaming down her face, she just couldn't control it.

"Ma…ma" Rosie said in her tiny little voice as she opened her arms at her mother so she would hold her and smiled sweetly, she just jumped up and down excitedly with her little legs and tried to get her mom to grab her. Jade felt so overwhelmed by her child's love and need that she only covered her face and started crying her eyes out.

"It's okay, it's okay" Beck said as he put his arm around her shoulders and kissed her head.

"How can she love me after everything I've done to her?" Jade asked as she cried nonstop. "How can she be happy with the scraps of love I give her? All I've done is reject her since she was born, so why does she still love me?" she questioned feeling terrible about herself.

"Because you're her mom" Cat said sweetly.

"I'm a monster" Jade affirmed and pushed her hair back as she looked at her baby, who was looking back at her and her eyes showed nothing but love for her and an angelical smile, which was the purest thing Jade had ever seen. "It's just…" she said mortified as she looked at her daughter and felt incredibly impotent.

"It's okay honey, don't torture yourself over this…You've been through enough" Evelyn affirmed. "We'll figure this out, you don't have to keep Rosie okay? We might have been pushing you because you've seen we are attached to her but you're the most important thing to us" she added.

"Your mother is right, you don't have to force yourself to take care of Rosie, we'll find her a good home where she'll be loved and you will move on with your life, I promise" Mr. West said but Jade didn't say anything, she was just looking at Rosie as they spoke and the baby was looking back at her with her arms open.

"I think we should take Rosie out" Tori commented and grabbed the baby to walk away.

"Ma!" Rosie said as she cried and called for Jade.

"Sh, sh…it'll be fine sweetie" Tori said nicely as she left the room.

"Ma! Ma!" Rosie cried again as she aimed her arms at Jade and she couldn't take it anymore, she felt her heart shattering and a shot of adrenaline ran through her veins as she stood up.

"No, no wait" Jade exclaimed as she rushed towards Tori but then stopped when she was right next to her.

"Jade…" Tori said sadly but she ignored her, she wiped her tears away and reluctantly started stroking her baby's crying face until she finally gave in and closed her eyes feeling something she hadn't felt before. Rosie took her hand and more tears started flowing down her face but she finally grabbed the baby from Tori's arms and held her close.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" Jade said as he hugged her little girl and cried her eyes out while everyone watched her with sad smiles on their faces. "I'm sorry baby" She whispered and kissed her cheek. She'd decided she would take control of her life back and that started with her child, she couldn't keep pretending Rosie did not exist, it wasn't fair and she didn't feel it.

"You do love her, honey" Evelyn said.

"She is mine…MINE only!" Jade affirmed and smiled at Rosie as she broke the hug. "I don't want to get rid of her, she is staying with me…because I am her mother, I have been a monster all this time but I will make it right, I will learn and I will be good, it's my responsibility because I am her mother, her mother!" Jade finally said and they exhaled as they nodded, Beck smiled a little and stroked Rosie's cheek

"Yes, you are" Evelyn said proudly.

"She looks just like you" Beck said and Jade smiled as she nodded, her baby girl was absolutely precious. "You're gonna be a great mom"

Jade didn't suddenly become the most caring mother, she still found herself having resentment against Rosie but she always tried to push those thoughts away, she wanted to love her daughter because she didn't want to give her away and if she was going to keep her, then she had to be a good mother.

"Tell me Jade, how do you feel about what we talked last session?" Jade's therapist, whose name was Martha, asked.

"You're right, I'm not fit to be a mother" Jade responded.

"That's not what I said, but it's interesting you say it" Martha said.

"You said I blame my daughter for what happened to me and you're right, I just…I can't help it" Jade said upset. "I love her, I know I do…I know I would die for her but sometimes I see her and all I can think is that my life would be easier if she hadn't been born, I see her and I see him and I know it's wrong but I can't stop it"

"You say you're not a good mother but you want to keep her, why? Is it some kind of punishment against you or her?" Martha asked.

"What do you mean punishment?" She asked back.

"You keep her as a reminder, you unconsciously maybe want to keep hurting yourself or maybe you want to keep her so you can unleash your anger on her, do you understand?" She questioned and Jade thought about it.

"I don't think I want to punish her or myself" She said sincerely.

"Then why do you want to keep her?" Martha asked.

"Because she is mine! She is my baby, I had her inside me and I spent all that year only with her, she is my child…isn't that the normal thing?" Jade asked back upset.

"You have told me you used to wish she would die inside you, you told me you watched her cry for hours and ignored her, you told me you even tried to kill her once" Martha commented and Jade looked down ashamedly. "It seems to me you're in fact punishing her for what her father did to you"

"But I don't want to do it anymore, I just want to love my baby like she deserves, I just want to forget" Jade affirmed as the tears streamed down her face. "I want her with me, I want to see her grow, I want to be her friend, I want to love and protect her, I want to be a normal mother, why can't I?" She asked angrily.

"Your situation is out of the ordinary and you know it but that doesn't mean life is over for you, you CAN be anything you want, including a good mother to Rosie" Martha affirmed.

"Please just tell me how, I need to know how" Jade responded.

"Like this, it's going to be a long process Jade, you must be prepared…There will be good days when you will feel you are good and there will be others when you'll feel your life is over, you will cry and suffer a lot but I promise you there's a tomorrow, always!" Martha exclaimed. "You will heal from this, you just need to set your mind to it and be persistent, don't give up and whenever you feel bad just write about it or talk it out"

"Okay…" She said.

"Have you had any suicidal thoughts again?" Martha asked and she sighed as she looked to the side.

"They come and go but it's not as bad as before" She admitted. "I wouldn't do it again, I can't…not after what Beck did for me and I have a kid"

"The kid didn't stop you last time and yes, Beck did it for you but that's not the goal, it's enough for now but we'll have to get a point where you want to live for you" Martha responded. "Have you made any plans for it when you get those thoughts?"

"I mean, I know my dad has a gun but I wouldn't take it" She affirmed.

"The fact you know it is enough of a risk, you need to tell your dad to get that gun out of the house, I trust you but it's a safety plan just in case" Martha commented and Jade nodded.

"And what do I do if I feel rage against Rosie?" She asked.

"Remind yourself who she is, look at her and realize she is not Scar, she is Rosie and she is yours only, he never cared about her, he only made you have her to keep torturing you and the best way to respond to that is by turning his attempt to hurt you into a gift, into something you can love and be happy about, don't you think?" Martha responded and Jade thought about it, she had a point. "But you need to be convinced you want her with you, if you have even the slightest doubts you should reconsider your decision to keep her"

"I have nothing to reconsider, I want to keep her…I know I could never give her up" She said and Martha nodded.

"Then keep those thoughts in your head, hug her, feel her, be there for her because she needs you, remind yourself at all times that she is yours and you're her whole world"

Jade continued going to therapy twice a week and working very intensively to recover, she followed all her therapist's advices and put a lot of effort into getting better because this time she wasn't only doing it for herself, she had to be good for Rosie. There were dark times when she even thought about taking her own life again but then she remembered her promise, she knew she couldn't give up and as she began to heal, she finally started to see her child as a gift rather than a punishment, which allowed her to love her without linking her to Scar.

"Hey honey, how was therapy?" Evelyn asked as Jade walked into the living room.

"It was okay" She said and took a seat next to Rosie's playing mat. "Hi love" Jade said sweetly and the baby started giving her some of her toys, she just toddled back and forth to give her things so Jade smiled at her. "You wanna play?" She asked.

Rosie couldn't really speak clearly yet, she only knew a few words but she tried to imitate others so she just started mumbling things and grabbing some of the toys on Jade's lap to play, Jade chuckled watching her and grabbed the toys to play with her.

"Here I come" Jade said in a funny voice as she moved the tiny stuffed dinosaur towards Rosie. "I'm gonna eat you" She affirmed and put it all over her face so Rosie fell back and started giggling, then she grabbed the dinosaur and rolled over with it.

"She's been good all morning" Evelyn commented.

"Yeah?" Jade asked and her mother nodded as she drank her coffee. "You were good with grandma?" She asked as she pulled Rosie's little leg towards her and started blowing her belly so she broke out laughing.

"I see someone's in trouble" Evelyn commented and chuckled.

"Surrender now" Jade said as she smiled at Rosie and tickled her but she was interrupted by Beck walking into the room.

"Hey I brought some donuts" He said and smiled at Jade so she smiled back at him but Rosie grabbed her head because she wanted more tickles on her tummy.

"You want more? You sure?" Jade asked and continued blowing her tummy as she tickled her armpits as well so Rosie giggled nonstop and Beck laughed.

"I see you are taking advantage of my girl just because you're bigger" Beck said and Jade turned to him. "No worries Rosie, we got her" He said as he got on his knees next to them and started tickling Jade instead.

"Ah no, stop!" Jade said as she laughed and Rosie just giggled as she got on top of her.

"Come on, surrender now!" He said as he tickled Jade and Evelyn just saw the three of them laughing on the mat.

"I surrender, I surrender!" Jade said as she hit him and Beck finally stopped.

"We beat her, Rosie we are a great team" He said and high fived her little hands so she smiled and Jade did too.

"Mama" Rosie said and laid down next to Jade, she simply kissed her little nose and hugged her.

"How you feeling?" Beck asked as she sat back up with Rosie in her arms. "I missed you" He added and gave her a peck on the lips.

"Better, and I missed you too…I mean, it's been like a day but yeah" She said and he smiled as he grabbed the bag of donuts from the sofa. "Oh donuts!" Jade exclaimed excitedly in baby voice as she smiled at Rosie and Beck handed her a small one he had bought for her, she grabbed it with her little hand and started eating. "Thanks"

"No problem" He responded and ate his donut too while Jade ate hers but then she just stopped and stared into space quietly. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing, it's just…never mind" Jade said.

"You can tell me" He said nicely and she sighed.

"He used to bring donuts when he said I had behaved well" Jade commented and Beck looked down. "But no, don't worry about it"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" He apologized.

"No don't apologize, it's okay, it was just a memory like many others I have and can't avoid because almost everything reminds of me of that room but I like donuts and he won't ruin this for me too" Jade affirmed and gave him a little smile as she took another bite and stroked Rosie's head, who already had her hands and mouth full of chocolate so Jade only chuckled. "Thank you, really" She said to Beck and he smiled at her.

"I'm glad to see you so well, honey" Evelyn said sincerely.

"I just realized I can't let him control me anymore" Jade affirmed. "I have my life back, I have my baby and I'll have everything he took from me, he won't win"

"That's my girl" Beck said on her ear and kissed her head so she smiled.

"Yeah and I don't forget my promise, I am just waiting for him to have suffered enough, for the three of them to have suffered enough" Jade commented coldly and Beck took a breath, he couldn't even say he was against it.

"You know what you're gonna do?" He asked and she smirked to herself.

"Oh yes" Jade said and looked at him smiling excitedly. "He'll regret being born, you'll see"


This was a much more positive chapter haha I hope you guys liked it!

PLEASE REVIEW! :)

As to the question about the story: I am working on it, it's gonna be a smaller story but it should be done soon!