Chapter 5 - Let's Make a Deal


Tackle rolls from behind one tree to another and lets loose a burst of bullets at Wilson's rock. The violet soldier ducks down and fires blindly, several shots embedding themselves in the Red leader's new choice of cover.

"Damn, this guy's good," Tackle mutters to himself. "We should capture him and have him fight for us."

Carbon peeks from around the corner of the base and delivers suppressing fire as Wilson reloads. "God damn it, where is Shane?" he wonders aloud.

"Here I am!" Shane sprints out of the base and hides behind a tree. "Sorry about the wait, Carbon. I just had to take care of something."

"What? Whatever it was, don't you think it could've waited? Responding to an attack should probably top your list of priorities." Before the rookie can reply, someone else speaks up.

"All right, men. Let's finally put an end to the Reds constant attempts to murder me in my sleep!" Evans runs out and takes cover behind a tree of his own, being careful to ensure that no one is able to shoot him in the back, be it accidentally or intentionally.

Carbon looks at Shane in disbelief. "Holy shit. How did you get him to come out?"

"I just talked some sense into him," he shrugs.

"Right," Carbon says incredulously. "I'm actually not sure how much help he'll be. I can't remember the last time he saw battle."

"I figured," Shane sighs. "He asked me how to use the sights on his rifle."

"Well, it's the thought that counts."

Tackle steals a look at the Blue base and realizes that it's now four-against-one. "Shit. Oh, well. Nothing I can't handle!" The sergeant opens fire and every Blues' attention is focused on him.

Evans sprays bullets wildly. He was unable to comprehend how the sights worked after Shane's short tutorial, so he decided to not bother. The rookie was probably giving him misinformation anyway; possibly a series of instructions that would cause the rifle to implode. It's better to stick with what you know works.

"This is for everything you've ever done, you fucking Reds!" he screams, his voice breaking with emotion. "Why won't you just leave me alone?! Why can't I have any peace?! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!"

"I just want my girl back!" Tackle calls out.

Evans stops firing, breathing heavily. "…The secret agent ninja?"

"Yeah, that's the one!"

"If we give her back, you'll leave?" the Blue leader asks with a twinge of hope in his voice.

"Immediately!" Tackle confirms.

Evans raises his voice, "Everyone, cease fire! We're returning their soldier."

All three of the other Blues turn and stare at him.

"Uh, sir? Are you sure you want to do that?" Carbon asks.

"Yeah, that's kinda… dumb." Shane adds.

"No, it isn't," Evans says. "Our prisoner is a spy; why would we ever want a spy in the base?! The Red guy also said that he'd leave if we gave her back. This is the best case scenario! Go get her, Wilson."

The violet soldier doesn't move.

"Wilson? Were you listening? I know you're mute, but you're not deaf."

Wilson visibly deflates, then slowly walks into the base, shaking his head.

"This is fucking ridiculous!" Shane exclaims. "Why the hell would we give them their prisoner and get nothing in return?"

"This is the smart thing to do," Evans insists. "And we are getting something: the ability to rest easy knowing that an enemy spy no longer lives under our roof."

"I told you this wouldn't work out," Carbon whispers to Shane.

Wilson returns with Brenda held at gunpoint. Upon seeing her, Tackle comes out into the open. "Brenda!"

The pink soldier had immediately locked eyes with Shane, but turns at the sound of her leader's voice. "Tackle!" she cries. The two of them run towards each other and the sergeant embraces her in front of the Blue base.

"Ow, careful!" Brenda yelps. "My arm is broken!"

"Shit, sorry."

"Aww, this is sweet," Carbon gushes. "Don't you think?"

Wilson pretends to wipe a tear from his eye.

"Are you guys seriously letting him do this?!" Shane asks in disbelief.

"Now, go on and get out of here, Reds!" the Blue leader yells at them. Tackle lets Brenda go and they quickly retreat.

Exasperated, Shane storms back into the base. "I hate this team so fucking much."

"I don't know what his problem is," Carbon says. "I don't mind returning to the status quo."

Evans looks at the aqua soldier. "What? That's a bad thing. The status quo is when I panic because everyone is trying to kill me. This is the start of a new era; an era where I've accepted all the bullshit around me and strive to serve the team while I can. We're never, ever going back to the status quo."

"I just meant we can go back to not actively fighting the Reds, but your response was reasonable, sir."


Reid steps silently down a hallway. At a right turn, he presses himself up against the wall and peers around the corner; no Blues. He gestures for Rapid to follow him. The rookie, who had been hanging back with strict orders to "not fuck things up," catches up to Reid.

"Agent Reid," Rapid says, deepening his voice. "Where is the primary target? This was supposed to be an in-and-out operation!"

"Shut the fuck up, Rookie."

"But we're sneaking!" he enthuses normally. "Play the part!"

"This isn't a game, you idiot," Reid retorts. "This is what I was referring to when I said you would fuck things up."

"I think it's important to have fun no matter what you're doing."

The crimson soldier sighs. "If I could leave you here, I would."

Footsteps up ahead catch their attention and they fall silent. Peeking around the corner, Reid catches a glimpse of a soldier in regulation blue. It sounds like he's talking to himself.

"I can't believe this," Shane rants as he heads to his room. "What the fuck is wrong with these people? The CO is insane, Carbon just puts up with him, and the other guy… seems normal, but doesn't talk." He stops walking. "Christ. I tried to help by bringing Evans to the fight and he does the worst possible thing. Is this my fault?"

"Why doesn't that one guy talk?" Rapid whispers. "The voice is a god-given gift."

"Shut up!" Reid snaps.

Shane thinks for a moment before shaking his head. "No, it can't be. Evans is the root of this team's problems, and to fix things, you need to start at the root." The blue soldier then continues walking, turning a different corner.

"It kind of sounds like he's the dysfunctional member of the team," Reid says. "Makes sense, because I've never seen him before today."

"Do you think he's a rookie?" Rapid asks. "Finally, someone who knows the struggle!"

"No shit, he's a rookie. He seems crazy, though, so I'd avoid him."

Reid makes sure the coast is clear, then quietly moves out into the open. At the end of the corridor, he spots what appears to be a room with a set of iron bars across it. He beckons for Rapid to follow, and the two of them rush to the cell. However, Reid is stunned to find it empty.

"What the hell?" he breathes.

"Maybe she's in another cell," Rapid guesses.

"I wouldn't count on it," a voice says from behind them. The Reds turn around to see Shane, his rifle at the ready.

"What?!" Rapid exclaims. "How did you know we were here?"

"I heard the two of you bickering earlier, so I pretended to leave and hid down another hallway," he explains smugly.

"Son of a bitch…" Reid mutters.

"Go ahead and get in the cell," Shane says. "It should be open."

"What if we shot you instead?" The crimson soldier takes aim at Shane. After a moment, he nudges Rapid who readies his weapon, too. "There's two of us and one of you. Barring my partner's inadequacy, you'll die if you shoot either of us."

"That's a risk I'm willing to take," Shane says defiantly. "I wouldn't mind dying if it meant not fighting for this team anymore."

"In that case, maybe you wouldn't mind telling us where Brenda is?"

"That bitch?" Shane asks. "Evans released her to get you guys off our backs."

Reid stares at him. "…Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me."

"Nope. See what my life is like?"

Rapid speaks up. "That's good for us, isn't it? The mission was a success!"

Reid has a great idea. "Hey, Blue, how about you take this guy as your prisoner?" He points at the red rookie.

"Huh?!" Rapid gasps.

"He'll be out of my hair, you'll look good to your team, and you won't die. It works out for everyone."

"What the hell, Reid?!"

Shane considers this proposition. After a few seconds, he nods. "Deal."

Reid yanks the gun out of Rapid's hands. "Sorry, kid, but don't say I didn't warn you. Next time, don't be such an annoying prick."

The blue soldier opens the cell and Reid pushes the red rookie into it, slamming the door behind him.

"No, please!" he cries as the lock clicks shut. "I promise I'll stop being annoying! Just let me out!"

His teammate leaves without looking back. Rapid curls up into a ball on the floor and starts rocking back and forth, babbling to himself.

"Well," Shane says, "looks like I might be able to convince the Blues to make me the leader without even killing Evans! Everything really did work out."