Disclaimer: SM owns Twilight and the characters portrayed in the Twilight Saga. No copyright infringement is intended with the posting of this dirty talking Edward (AKA: Masen), and his equally dirty talking Bella (AKA:B).

A/N: Its been awhile and I've been battling both writers block and outright Mommy-hood... you know the point in your life when someone who is 3ish feet tall and about to turn 2 controls your every waking move and thought, yeah... she's a handful, but I'm loving the ride! I've kind of put TMF on the backburner because I'm not thrilled with what I have for the next chapter, even though its pretty much complete. Rather than post something I'm not entirely happy with I figured I'd focus on this story for a little while since its been on my mind a lot lately. So here you go! Short chapter for me, but Chapter 3 is about done so you can expect an update in 7-12 days. *big hugs* to those who have decided to follow this story. I promise I'm shooting for more fluff and fun than my usual angsty ride for this story. *wink*

Big thanks to my beta Wendy! Hopefully she'll still be willing to work with me after I went MIA for a few months. ;) Any and all mistakes are mine, because I can't help but tweak, even after getting a beta'd chapter back.


Backdoor History

Chapter 2

~Edward~

My eyes shot open, courtesy of the thunderous knock that had come from the front door just a few feet away from the couch I'd fallen asleep on. I was surprised to find the sun down and the room dark. After glancing at the digital clock resting beside our broken television on the entertainment stand, I did a double take finding it absent of its usual red blinking numbers that would normally tell me the time.

Wonderful.

The power must have gone out; thanks to the damn faulty transformer and the over grown trees that our apartment manger refused to take care of before hurricane season hit.

After the second round of obnoxious knocking I forced myself up onto my feet. Slowly, I made my way in the dark towards the front door. When I glanced through the peep hole, all I saw was black. There was really only one person it could be, but thanks to years of watching Criminal Minds, and then mixing all of those episodes with my over active very creative imagination… I had to ask the obvious question.

"Who is it?"

"Dude! It's me. Open the hell up. It's creepy out here, and the weird cat lady a few doors down already tried to get me to come in and help her light some damn vanilla scented candles!" my best friend, Jasper, instantly shouted back. "Were you asleep? Don't even tell me you've been lying in here all fucking day, dead to the world!" he accused, before giving me a light shove with his hands pressed at my back. "I was hoping you'd have power. Mine went out about an hour ago."

"Nope. No power, and I didn't get home, asshole, 'till the sun was coming up. Tanya was of course waiting for me, ready to pounce because I didn't take the damn trash down before I'd left for the night."

"Oh! So, you let her punch you in the balls for not doing your mandated chores, and then you drank yourself to sleep in order to forget the fact that you're still a pussy-whipped son of a bitch. Nice!"

"No, ass-hat. I sat at my lap top for about an hour trying to get some words down, and then passed out, chemically unassisted, over there on the couch." I spat out as I made my way towards the storage closet to pull out our box of hurricane supplies.

Every Floridian had one. Ours had all the essentials though; four flashlights, two crank operated lamps, candles, a lighter, a plethora of batteries, two battery operated table fans, a radio, some bottles of water, a jar of PB, two boxes of 'Nilla Wafers, two jumbo bags of chips, three packs of Double Stuffed Oreo's, a package of pre-cooked bacon, and last but certainly not least, three bottles of hard liquor.

I grabbed a flashlight from the top of the loot and turned it on before setting it on the kitchen counter to pull out the other battery operated lamp that would easily light the rest of the small apartment.

"So, let me get this straight. She was mad about the trash, but not the fact that you were out getting strangers off over the phone for money all night long?" Jasper questioned with a snicker as he snatched up an apple from the fruit basket beside the glowing flashlight.

"She doesn't know what I was out doing, but even if she did know, it's not like she has a say anymore. She lost that perk the night I walked in here and found her bent over that slab of wood with a stranger's dick shoved in her ass," I spat out without taking a breath.

"True. Three damn years you spent with that succubus! I told you bro. The day you brought her over, I told you she'd be nothing but a headache with a great set of tits and nice ass. Which lets admit, is not hard to find 'round these parts. You could have had your pick of the litter, Cullen, but you chose her!"

It had been a shocking experience to say the least… walking through the door two weeks ago, after being out with the guys playing some pool down by the beach… the last thing I'd ever expected was to find my girlfriend with her ass cheeks spread in front of some strangers mangled dick.

Apparently it was entirely my fault though.

I'd told Tanya that I'd be staying out at Jasper's that night so she hadn't anticipated me coming home.

It was because of my best friend's extreme talent to land random pussy just by flashing his smile, that I'd been forced to take an expensive taxi ride home that night, back to the apartment Tanya and I shared; instead of crashing at Jasper's tiny efficiency on the beach like I'd planned.

Finding my girlfriend bent over with some fuckers slicked cock in her ass was not what I'd planned to come home to at one in the morning. Especially when she was supposed to be out with her friends seeing a midnight movie, after having dinner at Ruby-fucking-Tuesdays.

I'd stood in the doorway for a good two minutes just watching him ram her from behind with his tiny little pencil pecker, hence his apparent ability to complete said ass mission, while I ran good one liners in the back of my head.

She moaned into the air like a fucking banshee with her head pitched back and her hands grasping at her flawless apple shaped bottom jiggling rhythmically behind her. She literally looked like a goddamn porn star spreading her ass cheeks for him as he diligently moved forwards and backwards into her with his hands purposely placed on her hips.

My timing had been impeccable, because he came before I'd even had to request that he wrap things up so I'd be able to walk past them to go to bed.

I applauded when he pulled his slightly limp dick out of her. Tanya? She fainted on the spot… right into the backdoor loving, douche bags, hairy ass arms.

She of course blamed me for putting her in that situation.

Not because I refused to fuck her in the ass. Lord knows, I'd tried dozens of times.

Much to my discouragement, we'd only managed to get the tip in on a few highly intoxicated evenings before she'd roll over onto her back and pretend she was all of the sudden too tired to go on. Those were also the evenings when I'd end up just jerking off onto her belly and calling it a night.

Go figure.

I never got the assholes name who I'd caught fucking my girlfriend in our apartment, but when Tanya did finally regain consciousness, she instantly began spouting that I'd become cold and distant. Saying I'd forced her to seek affection from an outside source.

Who knew ass banging was a symbol of affection?

I sure as hell didn't.

I did however know the truth.

She was bored and so was I. We were both just too scared to break free from our comfortable little routine of a relationship to do anything legit about it. So… she instead chose the cowardly option and went behind my back to get it up her own back.

Literally.

To top things off, earlier that week, I'd also been informed that my dad had lost his seven figure job and was looking at serving five to seven years in prison for embezzlement. Ergo, my funds were suddenly nonexistent which meant; no more school tuition, no more car payment, no more rent money, and to finish my already shitty week out, no more girlfriend.

As twisted as it was, because of our history, and also my fear of living in a box downtown… penniless… it had made our situation difficult to deal with in that moment. Bottom line, I couldn't handle paying rent all on my own. Hell, I couldn't even pay for half of the rent, and Tanya still had a bottomless bank account.

She also felt guilty as hell for getting caught with her panties down while she'd moaned someone else's name in our home.

Because of that, it had been easy to get her to agree to let me stay here, on the couch, until our lease was up at the end of the summer. That way I'd get back the deposit money I'd put down, and I'd be able to use that to find myself some hole in the wall efficiency close enough to campus for me to ride the bus or my bike so that I'd be able to finish the last semester I'd need in order to graduate.

Since it was fact that I had zero feelings left for her, I'd believed that we'd be able to live under the same roof without it causing too many waves.

Lately though, it seemed as if she'd started to have some issues with my continued presence. I'd say those problems probably started the other morning.

She'd tried to get into the shower with me and I'd thrown her loofa in her face, before insisting she get the hell out of the bathroom, and then locked the door behind her.

Apparently, my ex thought a few weeks was all I'd need in order to erase the memory of her with her legs spread, while a pencil peen was conquering her ass where we ate breakfast together every morning.

There was no way in hell I'd be going back to that though.

No-fucking-way.

We were done, and her only remaining useful quality was the fact that she would be keeping a roof over my head until I got myself swimming above the water again.

My new job would serve as a nice distraction and also give me a good excuse to be out of the apartment.

"She won't be home anytime soon, will she?" Jasper asked, breaking me from my slightly unpleasant stroll down memory fucked up lane.

"No. She went to her cousins up in Boca for the rest of the weekend." Just as I'd finished my sentence, I heard a loud crash come from the other side of the wall, and then the sound of two female voices laughing loudly.

It was her.

B was home.

It sounded like A was home too.

I was instantly wondering what Bella's best friend, Alice, would look like.

"Want to go see if my new neighbors need a flashlight?" I asked my own best friend without even taking a second to think it over.

"Why the hell would I want to do that?"

"Trust me. You want to meet my new neighbors." I insisted with a smirk.

He instantly smiled and reached down to grab the bottle of Rum that was sitting in the hurricane supplies box, "Let's bring a house warming gift." Jasper suggested with a wink from his eye.

"That's actually Tanya's."

"So? Wasn't it your condom she put on some other guys cock to fuck her in the ass?" Jasper brutally reminded me, and then laughed as he gave me a light shove towards the door.

"True. Bring that shit. Let's do this." I answered with a straight face, no longer caring about how pissed off my ex would be when she noticed that her seventy-five dollar bottle of Rum was missing from our pantry.

Once we were standing outside of my new neighbors door I took in a deep breath and ran my hand nervously through my hair before slowly exhaling into the humid summer night.

"Dude. Are we fifteen again? Behind this door is possible rebound ass. Nothing more-nothing less. I know it's been awhile but relax. Get your head in the game!" Jasper mocked before reaching around me to knock three times with his closed fist.

A few seconds later I heard another giggle, and then came the sound of the deadbolt unlocking. I took in another deep breath and counted to three as the door slowly opened in front of us.


A/N: Dun-dunnn-dun-dun!

Will B be behind the door?

How much of a C-word is Tanya?!

Please review... I could use some happy motivating words in my life these days... plus I love hearing your thoughts. It really does help light a fire under my ass. ;)