The only thing keeping Jenna tethered to the ground as she walked out of the police station was Becky's hand, gripping her arm tightly, holding her there.

"Those no-good donut-eating useless sacks of shit," Becky muttered next to her, tugging Jenna along over the pavement. "What will it take? He nearly killed Jim, do you have to end up in the hospital too?"

Jenna blankly turned to look at Becky, barely comprehending the words out of her mouth.

The police had acted like she was making it all up. Like it had never happened. Like she was some dramatic, self-centered girl who was going through a bad break-up and wanted to drag her poor ex-husband through the mud. Jenna's chin wobbled as she flashed back to the interrogation room—they had actually put her in an interrogation room, one-way-mirror and everything—and how the cops had looked at her, so condescending. She shivered.

"Oh Jenna, I'm so sorry. Look at me, completely forgetting myself," Becky turned to Jenna and squeezed her arm even harder in apology. They finally reached the car and Becky opened Jenna's door for her, helping her sit and buckling her in like a child. When had Jenna become so useless?

"We'll just get you home and in bed and you can sleep this off like a bad dream," Becky promised once she had gotten into the drivers seat of her car—Ogie had gone to get Dawn and check on Lulu once Becky had arrived at the police station. Like parents with custody of a child. Jenna sure felt like one.

"No." Jenna replied petulantly.

"Sorry, what?" Becky hit the brake a little too hard in her surprise at Jenna's answer. Jenna turned to face her and took in her friend's face; sunspotted, overweight, with powdery foundation a shade too dark.

"Take me to Jim's."

"Now Jenna, you've been through the wringer today, and if you can't get a restraining order against Earl who knows where he'll show up next time. Dr. Pomatter can take care—"

"Jim's. Please." Jenna turned to face the front of the car, trying to stop her chin from wobbling. No more tears.

"Jenna, you're doing that thing you do where you self-sacrifice until you're positively worn into the mud, and you've got a baby to take care of. Don't let this man be another burden on you now."

Jenna didn't respond.

"Fine. If you're sure," Becky relented.

They passed the drive in silence, Jenna shoving the tears and painful thoughts down into her chest. The cops were right; she should have never gone to them in the first place. She shouldn't have left Earl. He was right in thinking she didn't deserve better than him. What a mess.

"Now Jenna," Becky broke the silence as the pulled into Jim's driveway, noticing Jenna's hand already on the handle. "You have to promise me something."

"What is it, Becky?"

"Don't you go using this man as a band-aid to fix the hurts that Earl gave you. You get better on your own, ok?"

"I already told you, I'm not with him. I won't be."

"Mmhm. Whatever you say."

Jenna opened the door and left before she could see the disapproving look she knew would be all over Becky's face.

Inside, there was a note on the island in the kitchen. It read: "Dear Jenna, we took Lulu and the milk you pumped home. Hope that was ok. We'll bring her back tomorrow morning. Wasn't sure what the timer system on Jim's meds was, so we left some out by him for when he woke up. Love you! Xoxo Dawn and Ogie"

Jenna read the note twice, her head still foggy from the ordeal at the police station. Then it clicked. She was supposed to wake Jim up to take his pain meds—if she didn't, he'd wale up too late and be in immeasurable pain. She grabbed the timer sitting on the counter: all of the different clocks were blinking at zero. He was past due for all his meds.

She tip-toed into the living room and sat on the ottoman next to him. He hadn't shifted since she had left him, lying there like a zombie, one dried trail of drool coming out the corner of his mouth. She gently scraped at it with her thumbnail, then brushed it off. His eyes fluttered a few times before opening slowly. Jenna watched, suspended. Then he groaned.

"Shh, I know it hurts. You're overdue on your pain meds. I'm so sorry. Here," she twisted open the pill bottle and dispensed one with a shaking hand, proffering the glass of water with the pink bendy straw to him as well. He swallowed with great difficulty, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. One of his hands shot out and grabbed Jenna's, squeezing tightly.

"Please don't go," he whispered, his teeth gritted.

"I won't. I'm so sorry Jim, something happened and I got caught away and Ogie didn't know to wake you."

"It's k," Jim whispered wanly. Little beads of sweat began to form on his brow, forming tiny crystals.

He continued to squeeze Jenna's hand. She didn't know what to say.

"Earl?" he whispered.

"Yeah," Jenna replied. She worked her thumb free from his iron grip and began rubbing it in gentle circles on the back of his hand, trying to distract him from the pain.

"He won't stop," Jim whispered.

"Shh, it's ok. Not your problem."

"No. Yours."

"Exactly. Mine." Jenna whispered. Jim's brow furrowed and the color left his face, leaving him a pale green color.

"Are you going to throw up, Jim?"

"Maybe."

"Here," Jenna pulled her hand free and grabbed the packet of ondansetron she had left on the table, popping one tab open. "Put this beneath your tongue and let it dissolve. It'll stop the nausea."

Jim took the tiny pill with a shaking hand and placed it in his mouth. He reached out then and took Jenna's hand once more, squeezing tightly.

"You're going to be ok, Jim. This will pass, and you can get out of this house and this town and go somewhere new and exciting. You can start over. You can find some girl who knows nothing about you and whisk her off her feet and whirl her around and fall in love with her. You can deliver babies every day and watch them grow up and know that you did that. You can escape. All of this will just be some distant memory to you." Jenna choked up as she whispered, imagining the life Jim might have. It was so exciting and full of possibility. She wouldn't get to see it, though.

"Come with me," Jim whispered.

"What?"

"Come. With. Me. Let's start over."

"Jim, we said we weren't going to talk about this."

"Not dating. We both need fresh starts," Jim paused, breathing deeply for a few moments. "I'll get a house. You can stay with me, wherever I am. Til you open your pie shop. Get your apartment. Fall in love. I can watch Lulu. We can move to a strange city but know that at least one other person isn't a stranger."

"Jim—"

"Shh," he squeezed her hand before releasing it. "Don't say no. Just consider. Please. Be kind to yourself."

Because that's who he was. Sitting there, in more pain than she could imagine, all because she had promised to take care of him and failed to follow through. And he still thought she wasn't kind to herself.


Ok so I quit my summer job. Fortunately for you guys, that means more updates! Woohoo! I've been on a writing blast over the past few days (lots of strong emotions from leaving my job means lots of emotional outletting lol) so I have a few chapters written for this and will probably have the rest up in quick succession. Also just as an fyi, the rating is going to be bumped to M tomorrow, so please follow if you don't know how to work the search filters rating-wise!

A big thank you to all of you who have liked and reviewed this story, even knowing it was going to be a long hiatus between updates. Getting an email from with a new review is like having my birthday. I live for it. Y'all are awesome, enjoy!