"Beautiful name."
The nurse left and I turned back to Steve and James, ever since I was little girl I always dreamt of settling down and having a family. But I never imagined that would be a possibility when I joined the Avengers and gained a list of dangerous enemies. But here I am, with my husband and newborn baby boy.
"Hey James." I said to him. "I'm your mommy and here's your daddy."
Steve carefully picked him up from my arms and sat in the rocking chair by the window, once James was born the thunder stopped and the rainfall was lighter. I leaned back on my pillow and felt my eyes close in exhaustion.
Meanwhile,
Steve stepped outside when Kida fell asleep, the whole team stood up and moved towards him.
"Kida is asleep, the nurse said you guys can come in but only a few people at a time." He said. "So, Tony and Pepper I think you two should go first."
Pepper held onto Tony's hand as they walked in slowly, when the door closed Tony walked to the incubator and saw the small newborn. Pepper covered her mouth with her hand as she approached him.
"What's his name?" She asked
"James Phillip Howard Rogers." Steve answered and Tony smiled
He stepped up to the incubator and looked down at his newborn grandson.
"Don't you want to hold him Tony?" Steve asked
"Well I just-just…"
"It's simple." Steve said "Just support his head and cradle his body."
Steve picked up James and handed him over to Tony, as Tony held him James' small hand reached out and touched the center of his chest.
"Hey little man." Tony said "You look so much like your mom."
"He's beautiful Steve." Pepper said
Tony didn't let go of James for thirty minutes, then they left so everyone else had their chance to see him.
Kida's P.O.V.
When I woke up I saw Thor sitting on the rocking chair with little James in his arms. Thor's massive size made James look smaller.
"Where's Steve?"
"He went to go get some food with the team."
"Thor there's something I must ask."
"What is it?"
"Steve and I have decided it would be important if James had godparents, if anything were to happen to us." I said "Steve has chosen his godmother and I've chosen who I trust the most to be his godfather. And I choose you."
"Kida I will be honored to be his godfather." He smiled and gently rubbed James' cheek with his thumb.
"Thor you must promise me if anything happens to me and Steve you will watch over him, protect him, love him as if he were your own."
"You have my word."
Steve returned and kissed me, Thor handed James' to him and it was time for Natasha. She smiled and reached down to let James grab her finger. The image of Natasha holding a baby both melted and broke my heart, she looked so happy.
"Natasha there's something Kida and I want to ask you." Steve said "We want to leave James under the care of people we trust the most. So, we want you to be James' godmother."
Her head quickly shot up, when she looked at me I smiled and nodded my head 'yes'.
"Are you two serious?" She asked
"Natasha you took care of me when I was little, I know you're capable of caring for a child." I said "And we trust you, so what do you say?"
"Absolutely." She smiled
The way she held onto James and smiled at him showed me we had made the perfect choice to make her James' godmother. After Steve introduced James to Clint they all left to get a celebratory drink and I spent my first moments alone with my son. After a few minutes of holding him I hummed an old lullaby Frigga would sing to Thor, Loki, and I when we were children. Once James was asleep I saw the door gently open and saw Wanda's face peek out.
"Is he sleeping?" She whispered
"Yes, come on in." She gently closed the door and walked towards me. "Oh my god he's beautiful."
"Thank you he sleeps like a rock, just like his father."
"What are you going to do now?" She asked "Will you still be a part of the team?"
"I will always be an Avenger but I will have to leave, Steve and I have decided to live outside of the city like Clint." I said "Where no one can see him."
"The world will know about him one day, you can't lock him up forever."
"I know I will let him see the world when he is ready, until then I will do whatever I can to protect him from it."
"Can I still see you?"
"Of course Wanda, you're welcome to visit us anytime." I answered "Steve and I are living in my dad's old lake house West of here. It's got a dock and a few acres of land, it'll be perfect for James."
Five months later,
For the time being I was officially no longer, an Avenger. I gave Fury all my paperwork the second I could walk after delivering James. In order for me to care for him I couldn't go out on risky missions until I was comfortable with risking never seeing him again. Steve still worked with SHIELD but I would hack into communications to see how he was doing.
Mom would come over whenever she had a day off work, and with each new visit I could sense more stress and strain on her face. Whenever I brought it up she told me it was work but I feared it was something more personal. Fortunately Wanda visited me almost every day, not only to practice her powers but also to play with James and talk over food and tea.
Their visits helped me deal with the emptiness in the house while Steve was gone, whenever he wasn't on a mission he would follow leads on Bucky. At first I didn't mind and even encouraged him, but the loneliness would take its toll on me and I feared Steve would miss important moments with James. And tonight was the night I had to talk to him about it, I stayed in the living room while James was sleeping in his room.
By the time Steve got home it was almost three in the morning, his Captain America suit was peeking out of his duffle bag and his shield rested on his back. He was clearly tired from his three month trip to Europe. He was unaware of my presence until I turned the lights on.
"What are you doing up?" He asked "You should be sleeping."
"So should you, do you know what happened today?" I stood up and walked over to him. "James said his first word today."
"He did!" He smiled "What did he say?"
"Dada, you could've heard it if you were here."
"I'm sensing that you're mad at me."
"Great job Sherlock." I said "You know that I support whatever you do and I know you want to find your friend. But are you willing to sacrifice all those precious moments of your son's life?"
"Every soldier makes that sacrifice."
"But you're more than a soldier god dammit you're a husband and a father!" I yelled "You have people here who are waiting for you, a son who needs a father and a wife who misses you."
"This is what we signed up for Kida when we became Avengers!" He yelled back "We agreed we were willing to sacrifice everything to save others!"
"You are wasting your time trying to find your friend rather than be with your own family!" I yelled back. "The only person your helping is yourself, to get rid of the guilt you had in World War Two!"
James started crying, I turned on my heels and walked down to his room. I picked him up and sat next to the window as I rocked him slowly. Even though my back was to the door I knew Steve was there, and I regretted what I just said to him.
"I'm sorry about what I said it's just." I had to stop myself for a moment. "When you're gone this house is so empty. There's no smiles, no laughter, no light or joy. And although I check up on you now and again, I constantly fear that there will be a world where James grows up without his father."
He walked up behind me and wrapped his arms around me and gently touched James' cheek.
"I don't know what I would do without you Steve." I said "I don't think I'm strong enough to raise James alone."
"I understand you're not the only one to go through this." He kissed the side of my head. "I'll put him to sleep you go get some rest."
"Alright."
I handed James over to him and went to the master bedroom across the hall. I went under the covers and closed my eyes but couldn't fall asleep. That's when I felt something big land on the bed next to me. I opened my eyes and saw Steve's smiling face.
"You almost scared me."
"Almost? You looked really scared."
"Shut up Steve."
"Make me, we know I'm stronger than you."
"You wanna go pretty boy?"
"So you do think I'm pretty." He leaned over and kissed my neck.
"What are you doing?"
"Keeping my wife very happy."
Chapter Song
When you say you love me
Know I love you more
When you say you need me
Know I need you more
-Adore You by Miley Cyrus
