Disclaimer: The characters of Harry Potter belong to JK Rowling. I'm just bringing them out for a walk.
Chapter 14
Panting slightly, he turned to face her appraisingly, "Granger, are you always practically naked when you chase others around? You could be on to something, you know. I mean, the Death Eaters will die of shock when they see you. At least, I know those old lechers MacNair and Nott will. Their wives certainly cannot hold a candle to you."
Scowling at him, Hermione remembered her state of undress and quickly conjured one of the bed sheets to a bathrobe and shrugged it on.
"Although…" and his face abruptly became one that was concerned. "Granger have you been starving yourself? Three or four of you could've fitted into Goyle for Merlin's sake! I could see the bones on your chest and back sticking out!" He gripped her shoulders and asked, "What are you doing to yourself? Answer me!"
She pushed his hands off her shoulders and shouted at him, "What I am doing to myself has nothing to do with you Malfoy! And before you get started on me, I think I really deserve to know what the hell were you doing in the bathroom!"
He looked down at his feet, slightly embarrassed, "It was an accident okay? I did not purposely set out to see you in the nuddy. What kind of person do you think I am?" he wailed.
"An evil, ferrety, peeping Tom one!" she snarled at him, holding together the folds of her bathrobe tighter around her.
He sighed exasperatedly, "It was an accident and don't you change the subject! Why are you so thin?" He grabbed her arm and pushed up the sleeve of her robe, revealing translucent skin stretched over bare bones. "You look like a bloody skeleton!"
Hermione wrenched her arm away. "You're shouting at me?" she cried disbelievingly, "Why are you the one who gets to be angry? I was the one who was spied on in the bathroom!"
"You haven't answered my question." He said quietly and somewhat menacingly. "Have you been starving yourself?"
"No." she replied mutinously.
His voice became progressively louder and louder, and just a little bit hysterical, "Yes you are! Look at yourself!" he gestured towards her body, "You said you were fine! You're supposed to be fine! What am I going to do with myself if you're not! What am I going to do – " He broke off abruptly and stared at her with a frightened look on his face, trying to hold her in place with his eyes, terrified that if he looked away she would become more and more transparent and fade away into nothing.
"I'm fine okay?" she tried to say calmly. "I've just been a bit busy…that's all."
He stopped pacing to stand in front of her, his tone clipped, "Stop showing me that mask you show to everyone else."
She spluttered, "Wha-what mask? I don't have a mask. This is me! It always has been!"
"Bollocks. Don't lie to me Hermione. Never lie to me."
She sat silently on the bed, not answering his questions. She could see him trying to hold back tears. "Why are you doing this to yourself Hermione? Why are you trying to kill yourself?"
"Calm down okay! I'm not trying to kill myself! I'm just…it's just…" To Draco, Hermione seemed to collapse inwardly onto herself. "There's just so much to do…too much to do… and so…and so I think, well, what's another skipped meal right? I'm not hungry, I'll be fine. Then it's another, and another…and another. And then I think, well, if I research this spell, there would be a good chance we could find a way break down his defenses right? So, is sleep really more important than defeating Voldemort? Well, logically speaking, no, it's not and so…"
"Hermione!" Draco knelt down to take her hand. "Are you even listening to yourself? You keep doing this and you're going to drive yourself into an early grave! No person can take going without sleep and proper food for so many days! Nothing is more important than your health, understand? Nothing!"
"But…but…I have to!" she continued brokenly, "I have to do it! No one else will and there's not much time left before he attacks again and…and I've wasted so much time already!"
Comprehension suddenly dawned on Draco's face. He said abruptly, "Are you feeling guilty? For not doing anything to help after the Parkinson Mansion?"
"How did you know?" she whispered.
He snorted, "I know guilt when I see it. Merlin knows I've felt it enough times to identify it accurately. You shouldn't feel guilty." He whispered that last part, gazing at her with something unreadable in his eyes.
"Malfoy! I practically slept away the weeks following what happened at the Mansion! Even Dean Thomas was up and walking and helping, and he has one foot left!"
"So you had a few off-days – or, well, it was actually a few off-weeks…" She glared at him and he continued quickly, "But, I mean, it was completely understandable! For crying out loud you had just lost your best friend in all the world and your…" Hermione was amused to see that he had some difficulty saying Ron's name out loud. "And your…boyfriend," he finally bit out, "all in one day! Anyone would've been inconsolable! Don't blame yourself, okay Hermione?
She folded herself into his arms. He smelled like spices. And to Hermione, it seemed to be the first time in weeks that she had allowed herself to rest, to crumple, and to just forget about everything else and all that she had yet to do. "I'm just so tired Draco," she sighed. "I'm just so…so tired." She looked up at him a bit resentfully, "How come you never seemed this tired when you took charge of the castle? I mean," she started to get slightly worked up, "How can anyone do all this and still have time for other things? Like, for example, basic nourishment and proper grooming?"
He chuckled, pinching her nose. "That, my little Hermione, is something I like to call delegation. You're not supposed to take so much upon yourself! In fact, you're supposed to share your tasks with everyone! That was something I liked about being leader," he continued dreamily, "giving orders."
She grinned, and punched him on the shoulder. "Okay then, the first thing that I'm delegating to you is to get me some enormous pancakes with honey and strawberries on them. Lots and lots of strawberries. With a side of bacon, fried eggs…oh, and a buttered scone!" She was getting giddy at the thought of so much food.
"No more masks with me, alright?" said Draco softly. She nodded.
"Let's go get some breakfast then, oh Great and Magnificent Leader!" He pulled her up to a standing position and they walked out of the dungeons in the direction of sustenance.
"Yes yes, make fun of the person who took care of you for an entire week!" she retorted.
"Oh please! I took care of you for a month! Don't tell me you're equating a week with a month full of tender loving care! You know, I don't quite think we're equal on that just yet. In fact, I say you owe me."
She rolled her eyes at him and stuck out her tongue.
"I will come to collect." He winked at her and she laughed.
As they made their way to the Great Hall, Hermione reflected that really, if Harry and Ron had known that the only person she felt she could be herself with these days was Malfoy, they would bust their lungs laughing in disbelief.
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The rest of the day was spent organizing her duties and delegating those that did not need her personal attention. Therefore, she had all but pushed the responsibility of communicating with the ministry to Arthur, telling him to let her know of any progress in the discussions with the minister. Not that she thought there would be any though. The job of firming up the defenses of Hogwarts she had given to Kingsley Shacklebolt and the remaining Hogwarts Professors, and she had entrusted Charlie, Bill and Angelina with the responsibility of liaising and receiving intelligence and information from the aurors and spies out in the field. She herself had continued to coordinate the movements of all of the members of the Order, and together with Draco, was also in charge of forming tactics and researching spells curses, and, of course, the prophecy.
Draco was right. She could do this.
The job of keeping everyone's spirits up however had come from quite an unlikely place.
They were at the thrice-weekly Order meetings (without the Weasleys who were visiting Ginny in the infirmary) when Lavender had brought up the subject of a dance, as a sort of celebration for the defeat of the Dementors and to make up for all the lost weekly parties ever since the demise of Dumbledore. While Lavender had been remarkably nice to her ever since the shower incident, Hermione had still thought that this dance of hers was a typical Lavender-type of useless activity.
"I highly doubt, Lavender, that this dance has any function whatsoever." Hermione had responded snidely. "We are supposed to be trying to defeat Voldemort for Merlin's sake, not plan parties!"
"Well I for one think it's a good idea."
Hermione gasped, "Loon-I mean Luna? You really think so?"
"Yes," she replied dreamily. "This will also give me a chance to examine mating behaviors of humans and compare them to those of the Crumple Horned Snorkack."
"Luna," Hermione began gently, "There is no such thing-"
"I think so too." And Hermione was shocked to see Padma Patil speak up tentatively in agreement with Lavender, "Not with Luna and her examining of human behaviors of course." She blushed, "But, well…we haven't had one for a while, and things have been pretty stressful lately. We could all use the break."
Hermione looked to Draco, hoping for some support for her case. He shrugged, "She's right you know, Hermione." She scowled at him. Traitor! she thought. "All of us here –" he gave her a significant look, "have been wound up so tight and taut we could break any minute. It'll be good to give everyone some time for relaxation and a bit of fun." He gave her a teasing smile, "And you could always go back to the common room to read your books if you wanted to."
She bit her lip, not knowing how to decide. "You know…" Neville said cautiously, "This is what Dumbledore would've wanted."
That decided matters for her. Sighing loudly, she turned to Lavender and said to the positively beaming girl, "Ok, you win. We'll have a dance." A whoop went up in the room. "But!" she continued, "Lavender, Padma, Luna – since you three supported it I'm putting the organization of this dance into your hands. Do not, I repeat, do not use any more resources than are usual for a normal dinner…" she relented at the look on their faces, "Okay maybe two normal dinners." The Dance will be held this Saturday night. If everyone has nothing else to contribute, I call this meeting closed. Dismissed."
She found him later on leaning against the door of McGonagall's office where the meeting had taken place once everyone had left.
"So…" he said casually, examining his fingernails, "Will you be taking part in this dance, or are you going to hole yourself up in the dungeons reading a moldy book?"
"Well…I have to admit that their enthusiasm has gotten to me. I think I might just go after all."
Someone seemed to be playing ping-pong inside her stomach as she waited for his response.
"Good then." And he started towards the dungeons. Hermione felt disappointed somehow but did not know why.
"Coming?"
"Yes, I'm right with you."
If Hermione had been standing next to him, she would've seen the brilliant grin on Draco's face. As it was, she was lagging behind and so had no hint whatsoever of his plans for Saturday…
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Author's Note: A little bit of fluff but also a little bit of angst coming up in the next chapter..
