quick author's note: i had one or two requests for what amounted to a swan queen story involving henry. this is not that story. this is a captain swan story from the viewpoint of regina mills, who is mourning robin hood. this is a collection of captain swan one shots. the requested story or one very very similar can almost certainly be found among swan queen fanfiction. thank you very much, and read on if you like regina and captain swan. *hugs*
It's been two weeks since Robin's death.
Regina still feels nothing.
It's just agony and sorrow and nothingness. Robin – her last chance, her love, her future – is dead.
And Hook's alive.
She can't pretend it doesn't make her hate Emma and Killian a little – okay, a lot – that she's had her love restored to her while hers dissipated before her at Hades' hand. (She does have to bless Zelena for that. She's killed her love before, and she has an idea of what Zelena has to be feeling.)
And she's not particularly sorry that Hook's alive again – it doesn't make her really want to go all Evil Queen again. She's always begrudgingly liked the man, just a little. His sass make him a worthy opponent vocally, and his past as a villain – however un-villainous he was at times – make him something she could nearly call a friend.
And, of course, his absolute adoration of Emma Swan.
Her former enemy. One she used to despise and who used to despise her. They don't despise each other anymore. They certainly will never be bosom friends – Regina can consider them friends, but she's done the saviour too much wrong in the past to expect such a friendship.
She can admit that. Confession and admittance of wrongs. Something else Robin helped her with. (That's how she knows they were good for each other. She helped Robin finally move on, and Robin finished Henry's years-long work and taught her how to be a hero.)
But now Robin's dead, and she's going to lose Roland – she hadn't argued when Little John declared that he and the rest of the Merry Men were going to try to go back to the Enchanted Forest, and they wanted to take Roland – she knew they were better for the child, no matter how much she loved him. All she'll have left is the baby, and she can't quite look at Robyn yet, knowing that she'll see both her soulmate and her once-wicked sister melded together into the face of an infant.
That will never stop hurting, Regina knows.
Her love is dead and gone.
And she's going to have to watch Emma and Killian arm-in-arm, smiling and laughing and kissing forever.
Regina's definitely jealous.
But she can't deny one thing. One thing that will prevent her from even touching the bond between the two lovers.
As she watches them at Granny's, looking at them – the princess and the pirate – and their love and devotion for each other – it does make her feel something. A kind of stirring in her chest. Releasing. Like the feeling just before breaking down into sobs. (She hasn't truly cried for Robin yet.) But it's also the relief after crying for an hour, the acceptance, the willingness, the truth.
She hasn't felt it in a long time, probably not since before Elsa came to town. She hasn't wanted to, and she hasn't been able to, and she hasn't really needed to.
Regina thinks that maybe it's called hope.
