Part 4: August 22, 12: 15 a.m.

Two days.

Two freaking days and Morgan had nothing. Nothing, nada, zero, bupkiss. The last two days had found him scouring through all kinds of psych manuals, reports and cases of people with dissociative identity disorder. A part of him knew that he was trying to fool himself and think that what he had done hadn't gotten to Reid by finding any other reason to explain why Reid had…well, broken.

He couldn't list the hundreds or possibly thousands of times he had spoken about a unsub's stressor, the reason these psychopaths did went on a rampage and did what they did. A breakup with a significant other, a death of a close friend, a job loss, and the list went on but on that list was rejection.

Rejection; the same thing he had done to Reid. It was clear that Spencer had gone against his gut and do something that was totally out of character for him; which was make the first move. And then to have his bold move thrown into his face must have killed the part of Spencer that Morgan, ironically was hoping he'd develop, boldness.

The amount of times Derek tried to push Reid to get out of his comfort zone were countless and the one time Spencer did, he was shut down. Fuck. What the hell was wrong with him?

Midnight found him paging through another book, which just like the others, didn't give him anything to work with.

It was on the second –or third ring, Derek didn't know which he realized his phone was blowing up with a call and he grimly reached out and answered it. "Talk to me."

"Morgan," Hotch said tightly, "We caught the Unsub and we're back on our way to headquarters, come in tomorrow and give us all the details about the situation with Reid, seven sharp..."

Shit.

"It'll be a round table meeting Morgan, everyone will be there…"

Double shit.

"….Strauss excused," Aaron finished,

That small mercy didn't feel like any at all but it was all Morgan could take, "I'll be there, congrats on catching the guy by the way,"

"It was a female actually but that non-sequitur," Hotch replied, "Get there Morgan, we need to get on top of this before it gets ugly,"

It's going to be, Derek thought as he dropped the beeping phone to the desk and scrubbed face.

BAU Headquarters 10: 16 a.m. August 23.

Fom the seven a.m meet, the past three hours had passed with the whole team, Hotch, Rossi, Morgan, Prentiss, JJ and Garcia going of what was now termed the Reid Incident.

When the team has been called into the room with a clearly mystified Penelope, JJ was the one who had taken Garcia into the break room and explained what was going on with one of her 'babies'. Garcia had come out with wide eyes behind her ruby red glassed and had grabbed her laptop with the stringent aim of finding out what had happened to her precious Spencer.

Three hours later, found them with empty cups of coffee scattered around the table, books open on the table and a lot more closed at their feet. The white board had theories from nervous breakdown to dissociative identity to schizophrenia; all crossed out. The team was getting tired, anxious and progressively worried while Derek was feeling guilty.

Hotch pinched the bridge of his nose, "We're getting nowhere. All of Reid psych evals read normal," Aaron stressed as he leaned wearily on the wall of the bullpen, his eyes searching over the five gathered. "There were no flare ups, no signal of any pending psychotic break. So what the hell happened?"

They were going to kill him but he had to speak up. "I know..." Morgan said almost silently, hunched over his desk with both hands pressed over his eyes.

As he expected, no one really heard him. They all continued spewing out hypotheses about why Reid had...broken.

Hands still pressed against his eyes Derek said a little louder, "... I know why.

This time he was definitely heard and Rossi's Italian tilted accent, a little thicker based on his recent trip to Venice dryly drawled, "Care to enlighten the ignorant Morgan?"

Derek didn't remove his hands but forced himself to speak. "Well, I'm not a hundred per cent sure but I know what might have catalysed this... Hotch...remember when I told you Reid and I went to the club and I was taking to this girl while Reid was sitting by himself and drinking..."

"Oh God," JJ groaned, "Did someone spike his drink? If he did get spiked that could cause an an-"

"No," Derek almost snorted, "You know I always keep an eye on him and besides the fact that Reid only drinks-"

"Cranberry juice and vodka, hold the vodka," Prentiss snapped, "Get to the point Morgan."

"Well Hotch... what I told you about hooking up with a chick… that was a load of bull." Derek said this time dragging his hands from his face only to scrub them over it. "The truth is...the night went fine, and I even got Spence to let loose and dance a little."

He knew that statement had evoked delighted surprise from the rest but he knew that what he was going to say next was going to destroy it.

"Soon though we decided to head out. I drove Reid to his place and..." Morgan struggled, trying to get the next words out but couldn't.

Closing his throat, Morgan swallowed again, flinching a little at the sting of saliva over an extremely dry throat, "When we got to his place..."

"Spit it out Morgan." Emily hissed with her eyes narrowed. "We don't have all day."

"He kissed me," Derek blurted out, "Reid kissed me."

Aside from Garcia's delighted gasp the whole room went as silent as a graveyard. That silence didn't bode well for Derek and he looked up to see impassive faces around the room. "Um guys? What the hell? You're not surprised?"

"No." Rossi shrugged.

"Me neither," Prentiss added.

Morgan felt bowled over, "JJ?"

A soft smile and a slow shake of her head announced that even she wasn't surprised about the kiss.

Derek groaned, "No one?"

"I've been praying for that actually," Garcia grinned, "We all saw it Derek."

"Be that as it may, what did you do Morgan?" Aaron asked very evenly.

Digging his fingertips into his forehead Derek grated, "That's the problem... I didn't do a damn thing. I knew I had about five seconds but in six, Reid was out the door and I...fuck..."

Derek swore pushing off his chair and started pacing the room in agitation, "Damn it.. I didn't do anything and that made it worse. If I had said something! Even if I had rejected him, it might have stopped this... But I really should have..."

"Told him that you wanted him," Rossi inserted evenly.

Seeing as he was backed into a corner and there was no way to avoid it, Derek leaned over the wall and stuck his hands into his pockets, "... Yeah."

A scrape of chair legs, an aggravated huff and the clickety-clack of neon pink heels announced the angry departure of Penelope Garcia.

Morgan almost lurched off the wall at the mixed look she gave him beyond the door froze him in his tracks. It was a melange of anger, disbelief and the worst... disappointment.

"Pene-"

The slamming door cut off the rest of his words. Derek felt a strike of pain run through him like a heated lance. In truth he would have preferred screaming rage instead of the quiet dismissal.

The silence stretched for a long moment before Hotch asked, "Morgan, how long have you been... having these feelings for Reid?

Derek sighed," I honestly don't know... It probably was always there but it grew after... him."

"Hankel," JJ sighed, her summer blue eyes down in dark memory, "I know... it haunted me too."

"I remember you saying you'd have Hankel's head on a stick, after the kidnapped Reid...and with the look on your face..." Hotch said, "...It doesn't seem that this started after that."

Morgan reacted, his arm swept over the table and three books clunked on the floor, "What do you want me to say Hotch? Huh? That I denied it for months- years even- and the one moment I got a chance to own up to it, I fucked it up? Is that what you want me to say?"

"I want you to take a break Morgan." Hotch replied in his trademark stoniness, "Go take a breather,"

"Fine," Morgan replied in the same tone and strode out the door. As he hit the landing he knew exaclay where he should go but hesitated before he spun on his heel and went to Garcia's lair. There, Morgan, with raised knuckles, took a moment to really think about what he about to do.

Fifteen minutes after the discussion in the bullpen where an incensed Garcia has stalked out without a single word to him Derek knew he had to make this right.
Now Derek was poised at the door of her "portal-of-all-knowledge" and was hesitating.

Penelope, for all her eccentric displays, over the top bubbliness, unfathomable optimism, kindness and forgiveness could raise hell when she wanted to. Garcia, when pushed too far, wasn't one to play with and she took her self-imposed "mama bear" position over her "babies" very seriously.

She never failed to mother her darling Spencer Reid whenever she could. She'd show up impromptu at his apartment with a plateful of freshly baked cookies or a basket of groceries, bathing oils or even catering to his nerd-ness with curious Star Trek or Wars stuff.

She loved Reid like a baby brother and by that alone, he, even with his standing as her "chocolate stud-muffin" knew that he'd made himself a place in the Tech Analyst's shit list.

"Oh, just come in Morgan." Penelope snapped through the door. "You look like a goddamn idiot standing there."

Frowning, Derek wondered how she could see him and then spotted the button eye camera just above the threshold and laughed softly to himself; Queen of all Knowledge indeed.

Softly pushing the door to Garcia's lair inside he stepped inside and immediately started talking only, under Garcia's glare, clamp his mouth closed so quickly his teeth clicked.

She on her feet by the time he entered and her body clothed at the aggressive leopard pink, knee high dress and strappy heels was literally vibrating with anger. Derek felt like the worst human being on the planet when he saw tiny beads of tears at the corners of her eyes.

"You," Penelope snapped pocking a similar neon fingernail into his chest. "I cannot believe that you did that to my dewdrop! How could you Derek!"

Taking a chance, Derek reached out and softly grasped her arms. "I froze Baby Girl... I swear, I just locked up and in the next moment, he was out the door. I swear Penelope; I didn't even know he was into me. "

Garcia gave him a halfhearted glare and brushed his hold off, "Even so, you know how fragile his is, you should have chased after him Derek."

"I know that now," Derek sighed in regret, "Hindsight is a bitch."

"Damn right it is," Penelope flopped into her sinfully soft desk chair and brought up a folder on the screen and turned to him, "Open it and look."

Slightly confused Derek took her wireless mouse and scrolled through it. It was an album of he and Reid, candid shots of them over the past years. The one where he had given Reid the whistle, one on Reid sleeping on his shoulder on the plane and a few of them chatting in the break room holding cups of coffee. Shots of them tired after cases, and a few ones of Reid gloating after he had hustled him at poker, pool and any other game that was up Reid's alley.

The last shot was of Reid, laying back in his chair, head titled to the side and his lips curled into a small smile. His left hand was holding a cup of coffee in one hand and fiddling with his edges of his purple scarf with the other. His hair was a bit longish and fell into his lowered eyes but what struck Morgan the most was the serene, peaceful look on his face.

On a whim Morgan zoomed in and traced the line of Reid's eyes and bit back a grimace, Spencer's eyes had been trained to the part of the bullpen where his desk was...where he was.

Reid was staring at him. Fuck.

"Honestly Derek," Garcia said quietly, "How could you not know he was in love with you?"

Shame, that was the acute emotion cutting through Derek's gut at the moment. This level of shame exceeded the moment when his fourteen years old self had to choke out the confession of what Burford had done to him.

"Derek…" Penelope said, "Do you know what you need to do now?"

"I have…no fucking idea," Derek replied, "But I think I need to try something."

Garcia pushed her glasses up a bit. "And what is that?"

With his hand on the doorframe, Derek threw over his shoulder, "Desperate times call for desperate measures baby-girl."

Back in the meeting room Derek looked a strung out SSA Agent Hotchner, "Hotch, I think I need to do something…it might get Reid back."

The older man's dark blue eyes met his with an unasked question, one that Derek was not prepared to answer. The look was mirrored by Rossi, JJ and Prentiss but none of them said anything.

"Go, Morgan," Hotch said in carte-blanche approval, "Do what you need to do."

Nodding, Derek grabbed his jacket left the room and on the way downstairs didn't dare to think of his plan that was decidedly reckless. If speaking to Reid wasn't going to get him back maybe something more tactical might.

The Lagham Apartments never looked so intimidating in his life. Derek frantically rethought this plan but again, he needed to try this.

Hopping out he took the stairs in an unconscious move to kill time but his long legs still took him to Spencer's apartment. He knocked and waited until he heard the deadbolt slide back and the golden-green eyes met his with a smile.

"Alex." Derek said stepping into the half dark room where the most light came from the TV. A quick look to the screen almost gave Morgan the assurance that Spencer had come back because Star Wars Return of the Jedi was on. But sadly, his hope was short lived.

"Yes Agent Morgan?" Alex/Spencer said politely. "How can I help you this time? I still don't know where Spencer is though."

Derek stilled for a moment trying to not obsess that his next step was going to either return Spencer to them or destroy him completely, but it was a chance he had to take.

He reached up and tugged his shades from his face and after swallowing tightly, reached out and tugged the slim, plaint figure to him, "C'mere,"

Alex didn't move from his grasp as Derek lowered his head and just before their lips met, he whispered, "Come back to me Spencer."


TBC