A/N: Hello all of my gorgeous readers, again, sorry I left you all hanging during this past couple of months. Let me just say that Organic Chemistry gave me an ass whooping this past semester, and I'm hoping that my cellular biology this semester will be a little more forgiving…

Distant Desire
by fiftyfantasies

Chapter Five

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Stay awake, stay awake...

The sound of Sora's hooves clicking and clacking on the ground was probably the only thing keeping me from falling asleep on top of him. My eyes felt itchy and dry, and my eyelids grew heavier by the minute. The slight sway to Sora's walk definitely wasn't helping my fight against the laziness seeping into my body either.

Looking at the sun I assumed it was somewhere near seven six or seven in the evening. We were a little over halfway between Asahikawa and Sapporo. According to Amagiri-san since he's traveled this road before, we still had about forty miles ahead of us before reaching Sapporo. My thighs and lower back cried out and ached in protest at the thought of having to wait another day until being cocooned inside of a warm futon. I already missed the coziness of the inn we stayed at yesterday. We left the ryokan yesterday shortly after lunch and rode throughout the night last night and only took a four-hour break this morning. We stopped for a quick simple lunch four hours ago.

I felt embarrassed and slightly appalled by how pampered I have become while living up here in the Northern Territory with Sen. For the past two years of living with her, she always made sure I received luxury-care that 'every clan leader' should receive, which at first I tried to refuse, but of course didn't want to appear rude and eventually gave in. Thankfully I'm adaptable and was quickly adjusting to living life on the road, which mainly consisted of minimalism and little to no privacy.

It amazed me how we have only been traveling for three, almost four days and already this journey felt as though it's been weeks long. I couldn't imagine the journey being on foot, or with a wagon like Sen proposed before our trip. The wagon would only double our time if we traveled with it towed behind us, and the Southern Lord was expecting us to have Sen there by December, not February. Besides, us having a wagon in tow also increased the risk of burglary.

Looking up to the sky I could see another storm brewing off in the distance towards the North Eastern mountains. The sight of deep grey clouds and sparks of lightning over the mountain, mixing with the orange evening sun was absolutely breathtaking.

"We'll stop here for the night," Kimigiku called out to the group, bringing her and Sen's horse to a halt, I almost sighed out in delight. We drifted away from the road to a grove of trees to hopefully eat something and get some sleep.

Sen slid off of her horse sloppily and raised her arms above her head in a long stretch and groaned while Kimigiku dug through her saddlebag to grab her canteen. Dismounting Sora without falling face first on to the ground and this time being able to stand up without trouble, I walked over to Sen and Kimigiku. Looking over my shoulder I could see the three other Oni's also digging through their packs for water and trying to find something to eat, only for Shiranui to pull out some dried salted meat and nuts.

"Chizuru, would you be able to hunt some fish for dinner while I and the others set up camp?" Kimigiku asked as she was in the middle of taking off Katsu's reins. I nodded, happy to be of some help right now. Grabbing my bow and quiver from my saddle, Sen walked over and laced her arm through mine. "I'll come with you and keep you company, I need to stretch my legs anyway." Sen gave me a gentle yet tired smile with her blanket bundled in her other arm.

"Which means try not to talk and scare the fish away, Sen-hime." Kimigiku sighed with one hand on her hip. Kazama chuckled with a smirk on his lips and Shiranui silently cackled. Amagiri, as his usual stoic self-didn't find any amusement in the joke. Though in Sen's case it was a serious word of caution.

Sen frowned, not at all amused like the other two men were. I smiled and tugged her along. "I always enjoy your company Osen-chan." My eyes shifted towards Kazama and met his eyes. "More so than others," I whispered to Sen silently, but not quiet enough since his smile turned into a frown and his eyebrows furrowed slightly.

Sen followed my gaze and then smirked, "Oh that's not so hard to beat." We both walked away into the woods arms lace together towards a river that we passed half a mile ago.

"How much longer?"

Sen all but groaned out from a rock she currently sat on with her blanket wrapped around her as a shawl. She sat hunched over with her elbows on her knees and face cradled in her hands, with no doubt a bored expression in her drooping tired eyes.

I looked back at her apologetically, "I only need to two more fish before we can go."

I agreed with Sen that I really did need to hurry, not just because of her boredom, but because the sun would set in a little while. Which would then make it ten times harder to hit a fish in the dark water.

Not to mention my feet were getting pretty numb from wading in the water until it reached above my knees. My hair was let down loose so I could use my hair ribbon to tie my chiffon skirt in a bun to my right side so I won't have to walk back to camp soaking wet. My sandals and black stockings sitting next to Sen on the river bank.

"You know this would probably go a little faster if you would just use your demon senses." Sen drawled out in a bored tone. I flinched and turned away from her. This indeed would go a lot of faster if I turned on my heightened senses. But...

"I...I thought you knew how to use your senses?" Sen questioned with a bit more concerned enthusiasm in her tone from before. I felt my cheeks grow warm in embarrassment.

"I-It's a bit harder for me to learn these things from Kimigiku. I guess it doesn't come as easy to me as it should."

Frustration then made my lips tighten and brow furrow. Trying as hard as I could I tried to 'center' myself and clear my thoughts as Kimigiku had instructed a long time ago. I focused on my energy and directed it towards my eyes.

But this indiscernible energy that Kimigiku and Sen talk about was hard for me to mentally and physically grasp, and in turn, couldn't figure out what to send to my eyes. There was very few and rare moment where I could feel my eyes dilate and for a few seconds, I could see things that were almost unimaginable, compared to the human eye.

For these few and spectacular moments, I could see the specs of dust floating in the air, the tiny fire ant that crawled on the ground and even, tucked away in the forest's canopy, the rise and fall of a finch's breast. It always boggled my mind on how I could operate using my ordinary vision compared to now. It almost felt like I was operating blindly compared to this.

But those few seconds that made me feel like the powerful demon I truly am, those few seconds that clearly differentiated me from humans were always gone too soon as my focus on that invisible energy was once again lost.

Groaning in frustration I slapped the water and stalked towards the river shore to go and sit next to Sen on her boulder.

The Demon Princess sighed and wrapped her shawl around the both of us. "I know you're having a hard time connecting with your inner demon spirit, but try not to give up hope or become too frustrated with yourself." Sen soothed me and drew me in closer for a hug. I placed my head on her shoulder and sighed out my frustration into the evening air.

"I know, it's just that I really am trying, but Kimigiku has tried almost everything with me and I don't want to keep pestering her any longer for that type of training anymore."

"Have you asked anyone else from my village to help you?" Sen asked. I nodded my head but hesitated on naming who it was, but I knew she was going to ask until she knew exactly who. "I asked Akihiro-san a few months ago, even he couldn't help me." Sen brightened at the sound of the man's name. Akihiro was one of the men that Sen tried to talk me into courting. I respectfully declined her numerous times, but that doesn't mean that she hinted to Akihiro to start spending more time with me.

"Oh? And tell me, did you learn anything from Akihiro-san? Anything at all?" I shook my head, Sen's mischevious smile disappearing.

"No, not even he could help me..." I trailed off before leaping to my feet, a fish gliding through the waters close to the river bank quickly grabbing my attention.

With impressive speed for even myself, I nocked an arrow in my bow and quickly shot my arrow into the crystal clear waters of the river. After a beat of silence and me grinning in victory, the fish floated to the top with my arrow sticking out of its side.

"Wow, what a shot." Sen complimented me, her eyes wide at the sudden flash of events.

"Thanks," Smiling softly I grabbed the arrow-impaled fish and waded back to the shore to put it next to the four other fish. "If you can't be proud of your connecting with your demon, at least be proud of your archery. I still think that it's amazing that you're at this skill level after only two years of training. Even you, the modest-bashful Chizuru, have to admit you're damn good with a bow."

I blushed at her compliment and looked away. I waded back into the water to again wait for another unfortunate fish to swim across my path.

Sen broke the few peaceful moments of silence with a dreadful suggestion. "As much as I'm against this, maybe you could ask Kazama-san to help teach you?" Whirling around I stared at her.

"Kazama-san? Why would I want him to teach me?" My arms were crossed, quickly on the defense with his name being spoken.

Sen shrugged, "Well since he's the head of his village it's his job to teach the younger generations how to harness their powers, so I thought it might actually work out for you." Sen then gave me a curious glance. "Why the sudden opposition?"

I bit my lip and looked away from her and back into the water, to search for a phantom fish. "Well... We just never really had a good history between us. Then there was that time of him trying to kidnap me those few years ago. And it still seems he hasn't changed much."

Sen nodded in understanding, "Well, it was an idea since you were struggling with Kimigiku, but if you're so opposed to learning from him I understand."

I kept my focus on the water, but my mind again wandered towards that intolerable man. It seemed these past few days that no matter what, he was somehow the topic of my thoughts, and it was starting to agitate me. This time I was trying to keep an open mind and consider asking him to teach me since I couldn't grasp any of Kimigikus teachings. But I was still hesitant to ask a man who tried to kidnap me, force me to marry him and kill my friends at the same time.

Sighing I cleared my thoughts and started to gracefully wade deeper into the water so I could find and catch another damn fish.

Walking back to camp, my skirts were slightly drenched from practically running and nearly falling into the river to finally catch the last fish. Which was well worth it since it was the largest one out of all six. The fish were gutted, skewered and ready to be cooked.

"Those men better have done something useful while we were away practically freezing getting their dinner." Sen chided with her chin tucked out. I chuckled at her and her fiery attitude. "Well, you mostly did all the work, but I kept you from getting bored, neh?"

"That you did Osen-chan." I hugged her by her side and made sure my fish smelling hands were close to her face so she could smell them. "Chizuru!" She squealed before ducking out of my grasp before lightly slapping me on my arm. I just stuck my tongue out at her as my defense.

Walking into the campsite the first thing I noticed was how our little area was cleared out and our futons were laid out in a half circle, a large crackling fire in the middle. Shiranui was next to the fire, checking a small pot which I assumed held the rice. Kimigiku looked up from her book and smiled at me.

"It appears Sen-Hime didn't scare all the fish away." Sen huffed and stuck her tongue out at Kimigiku playfully after she handed her three skewered fish over to Shiranui that she carried back from the river.

Amagiri then quickly took the fish away from Shiranui. "A word of caution, if you prefer your food burnt to a crisp, then, by all means, let Shiranui cook your food."
Both Sen and I giggled and Kimigiku chuckled behind her hand, Shiranui only glared and Amagiri while he stirred the rice.

Walking over to the fire and squatting next to him, "Thank you for the rice Shiranui-san, but I can cook the fish if you'd like?" Shiranui nodded and thanked me with a smirk, "I'll go get some more firewood for tonight." With that, the dark-skinned man stood up and disappeared into the woods.

While attending to the rice and fish I could feel his eyes on me long before I could see them. Looking straight up, both Sen and Kimigiku were talking over something, not paying any attention, and Amagiri-san was near the horses grabbing something out of his saddlebag. Looking over to my left towards Kazama I met his gaze.

His eyes shifted towards my legs and I could feel my cheeks grow warm, and it wasn't the fire that was warming my cheeks up.

"I see that my soon-to-be bride decided to go for a little swim." That nickname that he hasn't used for the past two years made my heart beat wildly in my chest.

"I-I'm not anyone's bride, Kazama-san." I kept my focus on the fire and placed the fish over the flames.

"No," He agreed. "Not yet anyway." With that, he leaned back against the tree behind him and closed his eyes with arms crossed, looking quite pleased with himself.

I felt a twinge of rebellion swell up inside my chest at his words. At first, I tried to contain that bubble of rebellion, but looking over at him with his arms crossed and him looking smug with the idea that he can simply tease me, and if he thinks that I will tolerate that inappropriate teasing...

"No, I'm not anyone's bride yet, but I can assure you that you will not be my husband anytime soon."

His crimson eyes snapped open, and his lips curved downward in a bitter scowl, revealing the tip of a fang. But I stood my ground, I never shifted my eyes away from his and glared back in response. There was suddenly an animalistic part of me that wished I was more in tune with my inner-demon so I could also bare my fangs in retaliation.

But then that angry look in his eye turned into something else, that bitter scowl twisted into a sinister smirk. The way he looked at me as a predator would their prey made me then feel vulnerable and I again felt my cheeks grow warm, but my stare never faltered.

"Anytime soon? Well, I'm more than willing to wait for you, my dear." His words didn't anger me any farther, but they certainly didn't cool the frustration either. With an annoyed huff, I stood up to go and sit with Sen and Kimigiku until the fish needed to be turned over.

Once our simple dinner of fish and rice was all eaten and more wood was added to the fire, Sen, Shiranui, Kazama and myself all laid down in our futons in hope to get some sleep. Kimigiku sat at the fire next to Amagiri-san, both of them talking about their travels around Japan. Looking at them I couldn't help but admire both of their beauty. Or just how beautiful Oni people were in general.

A chilly breeze passed by and I snuggled deeper underneath my wool blanket. Looking over at Sen I noticed how she was already deep asleep, both her and Shiranui. But looking over at Kazama's futon, he was still awake, his brows were slightly furrowed as he stared up at the night sky.

I wasn't sure if I've seen him not look deep in thought or in a foul mood. What was he thinking that made him seem so stressed? What goes through the mind of a Western Lord? With his focus still on the sky, I couldn't help but look at his features. His blonde hair looked golden in the fire's light, it looked soft to the touch, not coarse and wild like Heisuke-kun or Harada-san.

His skin was pale, yet there were no blemishes or scars. I'd imagine him at least having a few scars with all the fights he gets in, but then again he was an Oni, meaning they would've healed the moment he received them. Also, the factor that he was a very skilled swordsman and warrior came into play, the few times that I've seen him fight with the Shinsengumi proved it, so it must be rare for him to be injured.

Before I could analyze him any further his eyes rolled over to meet mine. I bit my lip and immediately looked away, embarrassed for being caught. But after a few moments of silence, I looked back at him, his crimson gaze was still focused on me, his face unchanging and emotionless. I quickly rolled over, no longer wanting to be under his eyes and the focus of his attention.

It felt as though it took forever, but eventually, I fell asleep, with crimson eyes still lingering on me.

A/N: Please leave a review and tell me your thoughts, your responses always motivates me to write more!