After a month, Brienne decided that it was time to say goodbye to her little girl. If she would've kept her just one day longer, she would never be able to give her daughter to her dad. But she couldn't take care of her. Not at this times. Not while Queen Cersei was alive.
So Brienne wrote a letter.
She saved milk.
Podrick bought clothes they would need.
He would bring her daughter to Tarth. Joanna had to be safe. She had to.
"Again Podrick. What will you do?" She asked him this question twice a day, but Podrick was patient and answered all everything she asked him.
"I will ride to White Harbor. From there I will ship directly to Tarth. I will ask for an audience with your father. When I'm allowed to talk to Lord Selwyn, I will give him the letter you wrote." He mentioned to his bag, where her letter was in. Brienne nodded.
"I will give him your daughter. You are sure that he will accept your begging, he will raise and treat her well," Podrick said and smiled a little.
Brienne smiled at him too. "Right. You will go tomorrow. We can't wait another day."
She needed to say goodbye to Joanna. Brienne would do that tonight.
She'd never seen herself as a mother. As a warrior, yes. But to have a little girl on her own, felt it growing in her belly. And after she gave birth to her, fed her and carried her, Brienne realized, that she never wanted to miss it.
That's why she kept her daughter a bit longer than planned. She didn't want to give the girl to her father. But Selwyn Tarth was the only and best option she had. Joanna couldn't stay at her side.
The next morning, Podrick and Joanna left her. Brienne never felt so alone, and for a moment she let herself grieve.
She cried for the first time in a very long time.
For the loss of her child, she didn't think of seeing her again in her life.
For Jaime, she didn't believe she would ever be able to tell him.
The letter she wrote for her dad included Jaime Lannister as Joanna's Dad. As soon as Cersei was dead, her father would send a raven to Jaime. He should know, but not as long as Queen Cersei was alive. Joanna wouldn't make it out alive. And she wanted her daughter to live a happy life. There was no better place than Tarth for this.
After that, she didn't allow herself to even think about her daughter or Jaime. She had a job to do.
Podrick's journey took a month. He came back without Joanna. His mission was successful. Her father had accepted her wish and sent a letter with Podrick to let her know he would do everything, Brienne begged him for. At least, he wrote, he was happy that Brienne had finally found a man who loved her a, a man she loved.
She had the best father, Selwyn of Tarth was the kindest man she ever knew. Brienne loved him even more as she read his words. She then burned the letter. No one was allowed to know her secret.
"We will never talk about Joanna anymore. Do you understand that, Podrick?"
"Yes, Milady, I will never mention her anymore."
She nodded, and they continued their journey.
They found Sansa.
Saved her.
Took back Winterfell and Brienne trained Podrick, he became better these days.
Served Sansa when her person was asked.
Met Jaime at Riverrun, where he kissed her again.
Where they talked, held each other.
Jaime didn't look good.
He'd lost his second child, and Brienne couldn't comfort him, by letting him know that there was a little girl who knew her daddy loved her.
Again, she said goodbye to Ser Jaime.
Watched Littlefinger from a distance, she didn't trust him an inch.
Bran Stark came back from the North. Jon Snow, now the King of the North, decided to visit the Dragon Queen.
Arya Stark came back from nowhere.
And Sansa Stark, the new Lady of Winterfell? She decided to send Brienne to Kingslanding.
"You said Ser Jaime was always kind to you," Sansa argued when Brienne told her she didn't want to leave her behind.
"Let me leave Podrick here then."
"I don't need anyone to protect me. There are more than enough Northmen who will do that instead of you! Hurry, your journey won't be easy these days!"
Brienne could just nod. She had to follow Lady Sansa's words. And so Podrick and her traveled to Kingslanding.
Back to him, the man he loved.
He'd lost his third child. When she saw him at the Dragon's pit, his appearance was worse than ever. The first thing she thought was: he's broken. His sister finally made it.
Jaime could barely look at her. But she could see in his face that he wanted to.
She tried to talk to him after Cersei left the pit full of anger. He went away.
"Ser Jaime." Brienne tried to walk after him.
"It's been good to see you. I imagine the next time will be across a battlefield."
Jaime walked straight behind his queen, didn't look at her, his face a mask.
"We both saw what just happened," she tried again, wanted to reach him with her words.
"We both saw that...thing."
"Yes, and I'm not looking forward to seeing more of them. But I'm loyal to the queen, and you're loyal to Sansa and her dolt brother."
Brienne grabbed his shoulder, angry this time.
"Oh, fuck loyalty!" She turned him around to face him.
"Fuck loyalty?" He watched her in disbelieve. Never ever she'd said something like that. She could see that she'd confused him with her words.
"This goes beyond houses and honor and oaths. Talk to the queen!"
She pleaded him, looked him straight in the eyes, and for a moment, Jaime looked in her eyes too.
He then took a look at Cersei, she was looking at them, watching them but turned around to walk away when she saw Jaime looking at her.
For a second he looked after his queen, then turned around to Brienne.
"And tell her what?" Jaime asked her. She could see a lot of emotions in his eyes, even if his face was a mask. Maybe he was not lost. Brienne wouldn't give up hope. She would fight for him.
They walked away, and Brienne didn't give it another try.
Tyrion Lannister did.
And he was successful it seemed.
The queen came back and promised her help fighting the White Walker.
After everything was said and done, it was time to leave Kingslanding. Brienne and Podrick rode together on their way home, Brienne didn't want to sail with the others.
She had a feeling.