*author runs away and hides from angry readers*
Emma's legs were hurting from so much running in the forest in such a short time.
She couldn't understand how it happened, how their plan failed. Well, almost failed. Their plan was a good one, she was sure of that. Even Gold's addition was good. They found Pan's camp, thanks to Henry who held him from moving it again. They were prepared to fight with Pan's minions and even with Pan. Emma was ready to really hurt those little fuckers.
They got Henry from Pan, Gold trapped Pan in Pandora's box and for a few minutes, everything was good. Henry was back in her arms. He was safe, he was alive, and he didn't hate any of them. She could finally breathe normally. Even Hook was much better after they got Henry back.
That was, of course, until everything went to hell. Pan's shadow along with three other shadows attacked them when they started to walk back towards Hook's ship. Tinkerbell came to their help, shooting fiery arrows at the three new shadows and scaring them away, but Pan's shadow remained and attacked them. The arrows did nothing to it, Regina and Gold's magic did nothing as well. The shadow was too powerful.
All they could have done was to start running back to the ship, hoping that they would lose the shadow in the forest. The only one who was not with them was Gold who, as the coward he was, disappeared in a black cloud as soon as the shadows attacked them. They continued to run, but the damned thing was still following them.
She felt her legs starting to slow down and she stopped, just for a moment, to catch her breath.
"Emma, run!" she heard Hook yelling behind her. She looked back to where he was and saw Pan's shadow too close to him.
She looked at him and saw that he was starting to slow down; his face losing its color and turning a horrible shade of white that scared Emma. She decided right then that she would wait for him and help him get back to the ship.
"Run!" he yelled at her again.
"I'm not leaving you!" Emma yelled back at him.
"Take Henry! Go to the Jolly!" Emma hesitated, Henry was a few steps in front of her with Regina and her parents, running. "Go, Emma!" Hook yelled again.
Emma looked at him being chased by the shadow and with a big knot in her heart, she started to run in the opposite direction, towards Henry. She hated leaving Hook behind in his state, but deep down in her heart she knew Hook was right. They had to get Henry to the Jolly. Faster.
Soon enough they were on the beach and they could see the Jolly in front of them. Emma stopped running and looked behind her, waiting for Hook to appear from behind the trees.
"Emma!" Regina yelled at her.
"Hook isn't coming!" Emma yelled back.
"He will! Come on," David told her.
With a sigh, Emma started to run towards them. While she ran, Emma was still looking behind her to see if Hook was coming but there was nothing. He was not coming.
When they were finally on the ship, they stopped running. Henry dropped onto a box sitting on the deck with everyone surrounding him breathing heavily. Some sat directly on the deck while others found some boxes to sit on. Everyone but Hook. She looked towards the beach, but there was still no sign of him. She looked towards the forest, hoping that he would be close but there was still no sign of him. Emma opened her mouth to say something about Hook, but David was faster. Jumping on his feet, he started to speak.
"Hook isn't coming," he said, looking at the others.
"He will," Mary Margaret told her husband.
"He won't," Emma said, her back turned to them...
"How do you know that?" Mary Margaret asked her.
"I just know it," Emma said, turning to face them.
She could read the hesitation on their faces and she could feel the question that was on everyone's tongue. How did she know that? Why was she so sure that he wouldn't come?
Fuck everything, Emma thought to herself before she decided to tell them Hook's secret.
"Hook's dying. When he jumped in front of that arrow a few days ago, he was poisoned by dreamshade. He has been slowly dying since then, but he didn't want to tell you and I promised that I would keep it a secret," she explained. "I'm afraid he won't make it back to the ship. Not alone," Emma said looking back to the forest.
"We have to help him!" Henry said, jumping to his feet.
"Henry, we just got you back," Regina gently told him.
"Grandpa can go," Henry suggested.
"I will," Emma said.
"Emma!" Snow reprimanded.
"You can't. Henry needs you here," Regina told her.
"Hook is out there, alone, dying. I can't leave him there." Emma responded.
"Let me come with you," David said, preparing his sword.
"No. I can do it. Give me two hours." She started walking away before anyone could say something else.
"Tink?" Emma gestured to the fairy to come with her. When they were away from the others, Emma started to talk. "Hook has been poisoned with dreamshade. He said there is no cure for it, but I was wondering if maybe you know something?"
"I am sorry, Emma, Hook was right."
"There is absolutely nothing? Are you sure?"
"There might be some things that can be done by those with light magic, but I don't know anyone who has it. And these two," she said, pointing to Regina and Gold, "are far from that."
"Maybe we will find someone in Storybrooke. Do you think he can make it back there alive?"
"I guess it depends on how bad he is."
"Okay. Thank you," Emma said before starting to walk off the ship.
When she was back on the beach, Emma started to run back toward the forest. She didn't know exactly where she lost him, or where he could be. All she knew was that he was there, somewhere, and hopefully not dead.
Not dead yet said a small voice inside her head.
Emma decided that it was wise to ignore that voice. She didn't want to believe that she wouldn't find him, or even worse, that she would find him dead. He promised her, after all.
"Hook! Hook!" Emma started to yell in the middle of the forest. "Hook, where are you?!" she continued to yell.
But there was nothing. Not even a small leaf moving in the trees. And even then, Emma could feel something bad was going to happen. She moved deeper into the forest and continued to yell his name, looking for him, but there was nothing.
"Hook!" she yelled one more time, louder.
This time she heard something behind her. She turned, with a smile on her face, expecting to see him but instead of Hook, she was face to face with Pan's shadow.
"Fuck. You again?" Emma found a tree branch on the ground and took it, swearing at herself the moment she realized she dropped her sword on the deck of Hook's ship.
"What have you done to him?" Emma said behind her teeth.
Pan's shadow started to fly towards her. Deciding not to run away, Emma used the branch to protect herself. Somehow it worked. The shadow didn't come close to her, but then it wanted to attack her again. Emma used the branch again but this time, the shadow didn't turn away from her.
"Where is Hook?!" she yelled again at the shadow.
This time, when the shadow attacked again, Emma wasn't careful with the branch and somehow it got broken. With a swear, Emma threw away the remains of the branch and started to back away slowly. She turned around and started to run again with the shadow following her. Emma wasn't really being careful where she stepped so when the shadow flew on her right, she turned to defend herself but stepped on some tangled roots on the ground. Before she could catch herself, she started to fall. She continued to fall downhill, not being able to stop herself until she was at the bottom, her right arm hitting a tree hard.
"Fuck," Emma groaned, turning to be on her back. "Fucking shadow."
"Emma?" she heard from somewhere close to her.
"Hook?" she said rising to her knees.
She saw him a few feet away, supported on a tree, paler that she ever saw him and barely holding his head up.
"Hook?" Emma said softly, rising and walking toward him.
She sat on the ground beside him and tried to put her right palm on his cheek, but the pain in her arm was too powerful. She prayed that it wasn't broken. Instead of touching him with her right hand, she put her left palm on his cheek.
"What happened?"
"I fell," he said, weak.
"We have to get you out," Emma said, preparing to help him get back on his feet.
"Emma," he said, stopping her. "What are you doing here?"
"I was looking for you. Pan's shadow attacked me, and I fell."
"You should have taken Henry back to the ship," he said looking at her with soft eyes.
"He is there, safe with the others."
"Emma, you have to get back there. Leave this island. Pan's shadow won't leave you alone for too long. Tink can take the ship out of here."
"I told you, I am not leaving you."
"Emma, I'm dying."
"I know that! You kept reminding me of that fact the last few days."
"No, Emma," he whispered. "Right now, I can feel it."
"Hook," Emma whispered, feeling tears coming to her eyes. "Killian," she said, putting both of her hands on his face, ignoring the pain in her arm.
"Your arm?" he asked, and she wanted to let out a laugh at the fact that even now he was worrying about her.
"It's nothing. You have to stay with me for a little longer, okay? We are going to get out of here."
"Emma."
"Killian, please." He smiled a little hearing her. "What?"
"You keep doing that," he said still smiling.
"Doing what?"
"Saying my name. It's been a long time since I've heard it," he said smiling and letting his eyes drop.
"Stay with me," Emma said, slapping him softly on the cheek.
He opened his eyes and looked at her. Since the moment they met, Emma noticed his eyes, both their blue color and the intensity that was there. The way the color changed from the color of the ocean when he was calm, joking with her or flirting, to the color of the night sky when he was angry or he wanted something really bad had always fascinated her. But right now, the color of his eyes was slowly fading.
"Emma, I am serious. You have to go before the shadow comes back."
"I'll go. When you decide that you are coming with me."
"I can't move, Emma."
"I will help you."
"You are so stubborn, Emma Swan," Hook said with a grin.
"I know. Come on," Emma said, putting an arm around him.
"What are you doing?"
"I'm trying to help you get up. I need a little help though."
Together, they rose to their feet and started to walk slowly. Hook was whimpering from time to time. Emma was holding most of his weight and she was sure that if he hadn't have been wearing his pirate coat, his weight would have been much lighter. With a hand still on his back, she moved the hand that was on his chest to touch the place where his wound was. She felt the wetness as soon as she put her hand there. When she brought her hand back to look at it, her palm was red.
"You're bleeding," Emma said, trying to keep her voice steady. "We have to stop and take care of it."
"No, we are not stopping. It will be night soon, Pan's shadow can appear around us at anytime. We have to get back to the ship."
"No. We are stopping," Emma said, stopping in front of a fallen tree trunk. "Sit."
She helped Hook sit down on the tree trunk and then she knelt down in front of him, starting to work on getting his shirt off.
"You should have told me much earlier that you wanted to get me naked", Hook tried to joke.
"Shut up," she said with a small smile.
After a few tries and curses she managed to get his shirt off, and now Hook was in front of her in just his leather pants. If his chest hadn't have been covered in black veins and blood from the wound, she would have taken her time appreciating his abs and the generous amount of chest hair that was covering them, but she didn't have time for that. Not now and maybe not ever if she didn't take care of him and let him die.
"What are these?" she asked, tracing her fingers over the black veins that were inches away from his heart.
"The dreamshade's effects. I'm going to die when they touch my heart."
"Hook, these are inches away from your heart."
"I know."
Studying them closer, Emma remembered how they got in that position. His wound, she had to take care of his wound.
"I have to clean this."
"The rum is in the pocket of my coat."
Emma moved to take the coat and started to look for his flask. She found it and without another word to him she poured the liquid on his wound. Emma winced when he let out a cry of pain, but there was nothing else she could do. She tore a piece of her shirt off and started to clean the wound with it. When all the blood was cleaned, the only thing that was left behind was something that looked like a small scratch. Even she had bigger wounds back when she was a bails bond person. How something so small could kill him so quickly was beyond her understanding.
She kept the cloth pressed there to make sure it stopped bleeding, but the thing that scared her the most were the veins that kept moving under her eyes.
"I told you I was going to die," he said, following her eyes with his.
"And I told you I won't let you."
"Why?"
"I think we already had this discussion," Emma said.
"You said you care for me," Hook said letting his head drop.
"I do."
Hook let out a deep breath and looked at her with sadness in his eyes.
"I imagined this happening a different way," he said.
"Imagined what?"
"Making you care for me. I was thinking about courting you when we got back to Storybrooke. I knew you had walls, I still know that. I can still see them sometimes, but I was hoping that when we got back, one way or another, I would have destroyed them."
Emma felt tears coming to her eyes at his words. There wasn't a single sign that he was lying. He was telling her the truth and she wondered why he was doing it. A deep voice inside her mind told her that he was saying these things now because he knew he would die. He would die knowing that he told her everything he couldn't say when he was fine.
"You did it without knowing. You started to destroy them from the moment we met. That's why I left you on the beanstalk. I was afraid. But then you came back, you helped us, you brought us here and you risked your life. For us, for me."
"I wish you would have told me this sooner," Hook said.
"I was afraid," she whispered.
"I know. I also wish for one more thing," he whispered.
"What is that?"
"I wish we would have had more time."
Hearing his words, Emma let out a hard sob. She felt her tears starting to fall on her cheeks as she closed her eyes.
"Emma, don't," he said putting his hand on her cheek, wiping away her tears with a finger.
She couldn't say anything so instead, she put both of her hands on his cheeks and brought his face towards her, resting his forehead on hers, her eyes remaining closed the whole time. She felt her hands getting wet, so she opened her eyes and looked at him. His eyes were closed as well, tears falling down his cheeks.
Emma let down all the walls that were around her and her heart and leaned into him, bringing her lips closer to him. Remembering the feeling she had that morning, before Mary Margaret could interrupt them. His breath was hot on her face, their lips were closer than ever, barely touching when they heard noises around them.
Fuck, Emma thought.
They separated and looked around them. The color on Emma's face drained as she saw the shadow behind Hook.
"We have company," she told him.
"Emma."
"I'll take care of it," Emma said, rising to her feet and taking Hook's sword in her hand, forgetting about the pain in her arm.
Emma started to walk behind Hook, holding the sword up to protect them both. The shadow's eyes flashed and Emma could have sworn that she saw anger there, if that was even possible.
"I am going to end you once and for all," Emma said as the shadow started to fly towards them.
"I am going to vanquish you from this world," she continued, moving the sword to hit it, but missed.
"I am so done with you" she said attacking again but this time hitting the shadow. The shadow flew towards her and Emma raised the sword again.
"I am so done with this island!" she said, rotating the sword above her head as best she could with only one hand, hitting the shadow again.
This time after Emma hit it, the shadow flew towards Hook instead of her. Emma yelled out a 'no' and started to run back towards him. Seeing her coming, the shadow raised its hand and suddenly Emma found herself in the air, flying away from Hook. She found herself on the ground, sword thrown a distance away from her. She was back on her feet, ready to attack the shadow again, when she heard Hook screaming.
"No!" Emma screamed, starting to run toward him.
"Emma, run!" Hook yelled at her.
Emma found a rock on the ground and threw it at the shadow, but nothing happened.
"Get away from him!" she yelled.
"Emma, go!" Hook yelled again, his voice weaker this time.
She looked shockingly at Hook as she saw the shadow pulling out something from inside him. It took her just a second to notice that the thing that was being pulled out of Hook had his form; it was his shadow.
"Let him go!" Emma yelled at the shadow in fear.
The shadow looked at her and its eyes flashed again as it continued to pull out Hook's shadow.
Emma didn't know what to do. She was looking at Hook, crying in pain, and felt her heart hurting her as well. She had no idea what was going on, but his screams were getting worse with every second.
"No, no," Emma continued to say to herself. "Find something to do, Emma. Something, anything, even something magic."
Emma's eyes flashed, remembering Gold's words from a few weeks ago. Her magic was controlled by her feelings. She hoped that it would work. Last time her magic manifested, she was scared for Mary Margaret, she wanted to help Mary Margaret. This time it was about Hook; she wanted to help him, she wanted to protect him. She thought about what she felt for him, how much she wanted him, needed him, alive. Closing her eyes, she concentrated on the magic she knew was inside her.
She knew the exact moment her magic was about to manifest. She felt it inside her, like something that was waiting to get out. So she let it out. She let out everything while screaming, firstly letting out an indescribable yell and then screaming Hook's name.
With her scream, there was another scream that filled the forest. It wasn't human, that was for sure and Emma thought that it was the shadow's. She opened her eyes and all she saw was a white light. A few moments later the light disappeared, everything coming back to normal. Emma looked around her, being ready for the shadow to appear again, but it wasn't anywhere. She looked towards Hook and saw him on the ground.
"Hook?" Emma ran towards him, dropping to her knees.
He was face down, so Emma turned him on his back. His eyes were closed, there was no sign of any new wound, but Emma let out a scream when she saw the veins that were forming a black circle around where his heart was.
"No, no, no!" Hook!" she started to shake him. "Wake up, wake up! Killian!" She continued to scream at him and shake him.
"You can't do that. Please Killian," she said, pressing her hands on his chest.
She put two fingers on his neck, searching for his pulse and when she didn't find anything, she dropped her head, listening for any sign that he was breathing. But still nothing, there was nothing at all. He didn't have a pulse, he wasn't breathing and no matter how many times she shook him or pressed on his chest, he didn't move.
Emma let out a sob as she felt tears coming down her cheeks.
"Please wake up," she cried, finally stopping herself from pressing anymore on his chest.
The veins didn't move. They stayed there, frozen in a circle covering the place where his heart was and Emma knew, in that moment, that no matter what she tried, he wouldn't wake up. She moved her hands to his face, one hand moving a strand of hair that was on his forehead and the other stroking his face. One of her tears fell on his cheek and she moved her palm to wipe it.
"I am sorry. I am so sorry," she said, continuing to move her hand over his face, knowing that he wouldn't even know it.
"I am sorry I killed you. I am sorry I never told you how I really feel. I am so sorry, Killian."
Emma continued to stay on the ground, crying and saying over and over again how sorry she was for everything. She knew that sooner or later she will have to go back to the ship, go back to Henry and her parents, but she couldn't leave him there. She couldn't leave Hook alone in the forest, on an island where no one cared about him.
Emma looked again at Hook, eyes closed and not moving. She had to admit that he looked much younger like that, not a single worry on his face and she wondered if this is how people felt when they die. She stroked his face again, her eyes moving from his eyes to his lips. They were so close to kissing today, not once, but twice, and they had been interrupted both times, the second time bringing him his death. She never got to feel his lips on hers and now she never would.
Her tears continued to run down her face, falling onto his. One of them fell on his lips and Emma couldn't stop herself. She must be crazy, wanting to kiss a dead man, but she needed to. She needed to know how his lips felt, even in this state.
"Killian, I am so sorry I did this to you. You wanted to help me, protect me. I've been a bitch to you, yelling and punching you, without realizing that all this time my walls made me do it, in a desperate move to keep you away and protect my heart. But all this time I should have let you in. I should have let my heart have what it wanted from the very beginning. You. Deep down, my heart wanted you and I kept you away like the idiot I am."
With one last stroke of her hand on his cheek, she leaned down and pressed her lips to his. She didn't expect anything to happen, she knew he wouldn't answer, but still, she couldn't let him go. She pressed her lips harder to his and that's when she felt her magic taking over.
She didn't see any light, any rainbow like the time when she kissed Henry; she saw nothing. She just felt her magic taking her over, taking over them.
She kept her lips on his, not wanting to let him go. She was still kissing him when she felt it. Or maybe she imagined it? She felt his lips answering hers, but that wasn't possible, right? He was dead. Then she felt his skin starting to warm under her hand. What was going on?
She wanted to pull away, to look at him and try to understand what was going on. When she started to raise her head, she felt a hand in her hair, pressing her back to him. Under her lips, Hook's lips were forming what felt to her as a grin or even a full blown smile, kissing her back. She smiled too, feeling him alive under her hands so she gave in, kissing him harder than she kissed anyone in all her 28 years.
*whispering* I am sorry!