Disclaimer: I own nothing. .gnihton nwo I

Warning: Some bad language.

Skips and Pauses

The next couple of hours moved by oddly.

I say that because… well, it felt like there was a remote control added into my life for a while and buttons were being pushed by some bored, fidgety child.

Pause. Fast forward.

Pause. Play.

Pause. Skip forward.

Rinse and repeat.

I'd blame it all on stress, but that's exactly what I'd be doing: blaming. I'm enough of an adult to own up to a few things being my own fault since I ended up spacing out on my own.

Once again, my mind blanked out on most of the veterinarian's post-surgery explanations. This vet really loved to use words with three or more syllables, so I muted most of his words that went in my ears.

Then again, there wasn't too much that needed to be said. The bullets were removed, the wounds were cleaned, and some fur had to be shaved off to make room for the numerous stitches that knitted the flesh back together. But there were a few surprises. One of them was being given the chance to see the bullets they had removed.

Buck-shot didn't look like I'd expect it to. That's because they weren't buck-shot. Apparently, the doctor doesn't know the difference between buck-shot and bird-shot. I'd probably be more mad about having such a menacing sounding threat bouncing around my head if I didn't admit to myself that I wouldn't have known the difference either.

The veterinary assistant who tried to make small talk about those differences was helpful if I could have been brought to care and not skip over what they'd said. My cat was shot at. That's all I really need to know.

They looked less menacing than I'd thought considering the damage they wrought on the flesh of the white cat. Then again, they were not real bullets as it was explained to me, though being told that they worked by having a bunch of them being sprayed at you at once by a shotgun blast didn't really ease me. Try to imagine a somewhat generic bullet that had gotten into the hands of some frantic mother who attempted to make the entire world more child friendly. That's what I'm looking at.

They were spherical, smaller than any marble I'd ever seen, and seemed almost toy-like as they were laid before me. There were four in all and I could easily fit them in the palm of my hand with more than enough room to spare.

Of course, I didn't do that.

Another surprise that paused me was the news that the mama cat was able to return with me surprisingly quick. The surgery was tough enough on its own, and it did little to help the cat's frail state. The blood lost was the surgeon's greatest concern and a blood transfusion was needed during the operation. A blood transfusion plus a cocktail of drugs that were used during surgery leaves a person with a pretty loopy cat. Now, add shock from the actual attack and then it gets dangerous.

The vet was very strict about me keeping her in an isolated and quiet space; something that my own home didn't really have, except for the basement. For the first night, the clinic would watch her recovery and see to her needs, like bandage changes and applying disinfectant cream. After that, I would come back to retrieve her and take over those duties back home.

Of course, I agreed in an instant, but it made me wonder about what happened to the animals whose owners couldn't do that. Did they just get sent to another clinic? Healed and put up for adoption? Put down to stop the pain?

I didn't want to know.

Before I had left the clinic, I paid a visit to the recovering survivor. I was grateful for the opportunity, but it still stung deep at what I saw nestled in the bed of blankets. Not sugarcoating this: she looked ragged and lifeless. The plastic cone around her neck, the cast around her foreleg, large patches of shaved fur, and the thick layers of bandages that might as well have been a cast emphasized how small she looked.

She was more of an abused chew toy than the feisty mama lioness I've come to know her as.

It was difficult to hold myself back from breaking the cage door to snatch her up and keep her safe in my arms. With the time I've spent with her, I could handle the dismissive and independent behavior she always emanated. Hell, I would have been more comforted by that routine than by this lifelessness.

Nevertheless, I'm grateful for whoever had cleaned her as her snowy white coat shone in the shade of the cage. I was told that I could pet her, but it seemed that anywhere I would usually pet was painful to look at.

I knew Marshmallow would have jumped inside to cuddle with his girlfriend if I had opened it, so I stalled slightly before using the tips of my fingers to slip through the bars and brush against the top of her head. She didn't open her eyes as I did this. Probably still sleeping off the drug cocktail in her body.

"Hey there, you little stinker." Her ears twitch ever so slightly, making me smile.

A part of me wanted to shake her awake just to see her eyes. Those chips of eyes were always so strong and regal, like a little queen cloaked in the body of the cat. Seeing those eyes again would have helped to calm a bit of my anxiety, but I kept my touch as soothing and as light as possible. She needed her rest.

It took me a moment to realize that I was finally petting the white feline without her hissing or glaring at me. Instantly, I took my hand away, squeezing my watering eyes shut. It should not have been like this.

Everything afterwards was blurred until I had left the clinic with Marshmallow in my arms and homework to be done. I had to wait in the parking lot for a while as he busied himself sniffing my fingers. He likely figured out that she would be okay but couldn't understand why she wasn't coming home with us.

After answering his searching eyes with a shaky hug and whispered promises, I drove us home.

Fast-forward home, I'm greeted by Kristoff at the drive way. I've barely unbuckled myself before my door is opened and I was in his arms. Time paused for that painfully sweet moment. I was exhausted, mentally and physically. More than anything, I just wanted to stay in his arms.

As if reading my mind, he holds me even tighter and began to sway. It was a couple-thing we figured out about each other. Whenever the world grew too crazy, we were each other's anchor. Now, he held me together as I was ready to fall apart from this day.

Damn it. It was barely noon and I was already begging to jump into bed and forget about being an adult for the remainder of the day.

Time resumed the boys, both feline and human, came out to greet me.

A blur of fur was all I needed to see as Marshmallow padded towards his trio of kittens who tumbled down the steps. Olaf reached me first as he sprinted towards me, while Marshall was slowed by cradling little Elijah. Still sitting inside the car, my beautiful boys were smushed together on my lap. I hugged them to me, while Kristoff hugged us all together. There were not and still are no words to describe how beautifully warm my family felt to me.

It took me Olaf's hand wiping my wet face to realize that I had started crying. I kissed his wet hand and held them all tighter.

Between sniffles, I blurted out details as best as I could, censoring it slightly for my children. Even as I did so, my mind was spinning. Dinner need to be set, cats need to be counted, a quiet place needs to be created, playtime rules need to be made, because damn it all to the darkest pits of Hell, I will take care of my family!

I knew what I had to do.

What I needed to do.

What I had to ask.

What I needed to ask.

But, I didn't want to move. I didn't want to do anything. I didn't want to ask anything.

I was scared, tired, confused, and I wanted to stay right here and do nothing. A little corner of my brain knows that its because the stress of today has finally caught up with me that's making me this skittish and moody. It tells me that I'll do what I'll need to soon enough. It tells me that, for now, it's okay to just rest because my family will help me through this.

Almost feeling the heartbeats of 8 bodies around me, I agree completely.

The world could wait, so my family could hold me together.

Author's Note: I know I've been gone for a long while. I won't bother any of you beautiful people with excuses. Still, I like this chapter. It's small, but it gives me a warm feeling.

Vinzgirl, this chapter has teased you and so many others for so long that I can't apologize enough for it. I can only hope that you enjoy this little surprise.

As always, comments, concerns, and CONSTRUCTIVE criticism is always welcomed.

So, until next time, Au revoir. :)