One hand around Barry's wrist, Kara snatched the collar of his suit with the other hand and bodily slammed him against the ship's hull, using just enough strength to lift his feet off the ground.
Crush him.
"Let Barry go," Kara commanded, her eyes locked on the pink swirl of energy on Barry's forehead.
"You first," Barry snarled, and suddenly his body became a blur, his molecules vibrating as he dropped through her hands and ran off. In a blink, Barry was speeding back towards her, his fist pulled back, but Kara had V-9 coursing through her veins and could react to it now, sidestepping away while simultaneously using an open palm to block and redirect the strike. She tried to grab Barry's suit again to pin him down, but he twisted away as he ran past and stopped a safe distance from her, turning around in anger and frank astonishment. "How?!"
"Wouldn't you like to know?" Kara taunted, wanting to keep Barry off balance. The V-9 heightened her speed and reflexes, giving her the ability to keep pace with Barry, but defeating him was never the goal. She needed the speed to give her a window to destroy the orb on the ship that was controlling his mind.
Crouching down, she launched into the sky, shooting up so fast that Barry's desperate lunge for her cape left him clutching air. Hoping to finally put an end to everything, Kara snapped her head sideways as she became level with the top of the ship and fired her heat vision at the orb, scoring a direct hit.
Unfortunately, the orb was unscathed.
"It looks like the orb's made of some kind of heat-ablative material," Caitlin noted over comms. "You'll have to take it out the old-fashioned way."
"Of course," Kara muttered sarcastically. "Can't make it too easy." Aligning her body parallel to the ground, she sped towards the orb, intending to ram through it, but she got violently knocked off course by a sudden wind funnel. Barry had used his arms and superspeed to blow her off her trajectory, and she ended up zooming past the orb, out of arm's reach.
She tried again with another pass, but Barry then ran up the side of the ship and shoved her away. She tried a third time, and a fourth time, on and on, but again and again Barry was able to block or divert her. Her newfound speed meant that he could no longer throw her around, attack her indiscriminately, or otherwise catch her by surprise, but the fact that Kara's target was so obvious meant that he had the advantage in predicting and frustrating her, and Kara was determined to exhaust every possible alternative before even considering attacking Barry directly.
Destroy him.
Kara grunted in annoyance as her latest pass ended in Barry vibrating through her swinging fist and then blowing her off course yet again. "I can't get a shot at the orb," she said into her earpiece. "Barry's still too fast."
"I thought the V-9 made Trajectory faster than Barry," Felicity said.
"At the time, yes," Caitlin clarified, "but that was years ago. His connection to the Speed Force is so much stronger now. Honestly, I'm surprised Kara's kept up as much as she has."
Barry had now taken up a running defensive pattern up, over, and around the ship to block her no matter which angle she took. Hovering in the sky as she watched his trail of lightning swirling around her target, Kara shook her head. "I can't get past him. However the Dominator's controlling him, he's just too fast."
"Don't try to beat him at his strength, Kara," Alex suggested. "Beat him with yours."
Stuck as Kara was in a repetitive loop with Barry's counterattacks, Alex's comment made sense. With the V-9, Kara had been trying to outrace the fastest man alive, when maybe the key to all this was in her own abilities. This gave her an idea.
Adjusting her body in midair, Kara made a beeline for Barry, making a show of intending to simply punch him into oblivion from above and timing it to catch him on the ground rather than on the ship's hull. Of course, Barry dodged, and Kara pounded her fist into the dirt instead. Straightening up, she saw Barry halt a safe distance away from her, observing with a bemused smirk.
"Big mistake coming back down from the sky, Supergirl," he taunted. "I'll make sure you don't fly again."
"Don't count on it," Kara shot back. Rushing forward, she aimed another punch at Barry, who again vibrated himself so that she passed right through. She expected the move, and instead of turning around immediately to defend against a counter, she used the momentum to continue running at a flat out sprint away from the ship. Barry, caught off guard that she was heading away rather than towards the orb, quickly recovered and gave chase.
Not wanting to stray too far from her objective, Kara soon course-corrected and began veering back towards the ship. Vaguely, she hoped the split-second lead she had on Barry would be enough, but she already detected him accelerating, angling to cut her off, which forced her back. Soon, she was running in literal circles around the Dominator prison, and Barry matched her stride for stride, taking an inside track so as to constantly be between her and the orb.
Around and around they went, Kara's legs straining and her lungs burning as she sought a way past the Scarlet Speedster. A feeling of déjà vu squeezed her heart as she ran side by side with Barry, recalling the times they had raced in the past. They'd done it playfully, when they were still friends before becoming more to each other, to see which hero was truly faster. Oliver called it a frivolous waste of time better spent training. J'onn thought it was unprofessional. For the two of them, though, it was a representation of who they were. Yes, they wielded extraordinary powers, and it was their responsibility to use these powers to help others, but they were not ashamed that having abilities could be fun. It was simple expressions such as these over which Kara and Barry had forged their connection, and as she raced him now, Kara was determined to get him back any way she could.
It was now or never.
Kara's feet tripped over themselves, unused and exhausted as they were to this kind of speed. Her legs left the ground as she threw her arms out wide in a vain attempt to regain her balance, even as she tilted sideways and her chest turned towards Barry. In a blink, he took the opening and sped forward to finish her.
Kill him.
The V-9 putting her reflexes and perception on equal footing with Barry's, everything seemed to happen in slow motion. As her hair and cape flipped behind her, she saw the Dominator distort Barry's face into a look of triumphant hunger. She saw his legs churn underneath his body. She saw a green glowing fist cock back to knock her out.
And she got him.
When he was just beyond arm's reach, Kara slammed her hands together with all the weight of her superstrength, producing a thunderclap so powerful that a concussive wave blasted from between her fingertips, knocking Barry into the air. Her own body still airborne from her "trip," Kara immediately transitioned into flight, taking advantage of the precious moments when Barry was distracted and off his feet. Calling on every bit of speed the V-9 bestowed upon her, Kara raced to the ship and blasted right through the orb on the Dominator's ship, disintegrating it before Barry hit the ground.
Even from the top of the gigantic Dominator prison, Kara didn't need her superhearing to register Barry's anguished scream. Flying back around in panic, Kara landed next to him only to find him convulsing in the dirt not far from the ship, eyes shut tight. She fell to her knees and grabbed his face in her hands. "Barry! Barry!"
He continued to thrash for another few seconds, and Kara was about to yell at Caitlin to tell her what to do, when Barry suddenly stiffened, his back arching unnaturally. The Dominator pattern on his forehead sparked and blinked a couple times, and then slowly faded away, leaving behind normal-looking human skin. His body sagged lifelessly as it did so, and then it stopped moving entirely.
"No," Kara gasped, desperately stroking his face with her hands, "no, no, no." She leaned down to listen to his chest, but she was so out of breath from her run that she couldn't focus her hearing over the sound of her heaving lungs and pounding heart. "Barry? Barry please," she begged, looking at his lifeless face as tears started to form. "Wake up." Had she made a mistake? Did destroying the orb somehow cut off Barry's life? Did she…was she responsible for…?
After what felt like an eternity, Barry's eyes opened slowly, and Kara's heart leapt into her throat. His head turned a fraction to the side between her hands, and though his eyes remained unfocused, he still seemed to know her. "K—Kara?"
"Yes!" Kara choked out, relieved beyond measure as she nodded desperately. "Yeah, it's me, Barry! It's Kara, it's your Kara." Upon hearing her voice, Barry's face lit up a little, giving a small smile. His eyes then promptly rolled up into his head, and he lost consciousness. However, the fact that he had spoken and at least shown life briefly galvanized her into action, and she wiped her eyes before shifting herself to take Barry into her arms and get him to Caitlin as soon as possible.
"Hang on, Barry. If you die, I will so kill you." She stood up, Barry in her arms, and prepared to take off, but her legs suddenly wobbled and she fell back down into the dirt. A wave of exhaustion and weakness overcame her that had nothing to do with Barry's weight or her run, and her sudden loss of strength surprised her so much she was temporarily speechless.
You're soft.
"Kara, the V-9's wearing off," Caitlin warned.
"I…my muscles are all…" Kara started, barely able to explain the pins and needles stabbing her all over her body. Pain was also starting to build in her head behind her temples.
"Kara, get back to S.T.A.R. Labs now!" Alex commanded. "We have no idea what the side effects are going to be!"
"I'm not leaving Barry here!"
"You're not leaving at all," growled an alien voice. Kara barely got her head around before she saw an alien appendage swinging towards her face. The fading V-9 had made her weaker and even slower than normal, and her head rocked sideways as the Dominator's attack knocked her clear of Barry's prone form.
Her body rolling and her head swimming, she looked up to see a Dominator bearing down on her. Behind it, Kara could make out a hatch that had opened up in the hull of the ship, revealing a small compartment that she belatedly realized was encased in lead. The alien controlling Barry had been there the whole time, and as it stalked towards her, it ripped one of the Kryptonite knuckles from Barry's hand and smashed it on the ground, producing a razor-sharp, glowing shard that it flipped with disturbing ease between its fingers.
"Die, Kryptonian," the Dominator intoned, the alien hiss registering in her head. The V-9 had worn off, Barry was completely knocked out, and she was suddenly so exhausted that her body wasn't reacting fast enough to her mind, which was itself ringing with pain. Almost detachedly, she watched as the Dominator raised the shard, the combination of Kryptonite and its alien strength surely enough to pierce her chest.
You're weak.
Luckily, it never fell, as the point of a knife blade suddenly protruded from the Dominator's neck. The desiccated alien jerked once, its eyes widening as it seemed to realize for one moment what had happened, and then its body went limp. The knife point retracted, and the alien body collapsed in a heap, revealing a white, disheveled figure behind it with a hidden blade sticking out of her sleeve.
Kara's eyes went wide with shock and relief. "Sara?"
The White Canary immediately fell to her knees, having expended what little energy she had. Her suit was torn, her blond hair was a mess, and her head sagged, but she was an indescribably welcome sight to the Girl of Steel. "Kara?" she choked out, confused and discombobulated. "What's going on? I just…," she trailed off, seeming to lose her breath as she gestured incoherently at the ship behind them, "…I just fell out of some porthole on the other side of that thing and heard noises. Is that a Dominator?" she finished in the same breath, seeming to just realize what she had done.
Kara said nothing, fairly sure "it's a long story" was not going to be satisfactory. Somehow, the destruction of the orb and the Dominator's attack on her had caused the ship to release whatever hold it had on its Justice League prisoners. Sara had clearly been through the ringer, probably overwhelmed so fast by Barry's kidnapping that she had no clue what had happened, but generally she seemed okay, which Kara was grateful for as she herself desperately needed help.
Surrender.
The high-pitched whine in her head continued to build, and thoughts she had dismissed as just random strands infiltrating her consciousness during the heat of battle were now an insistent voice that was slowly overtaking her. The V-9 had awakened something inside of her that was threatening to consume her mind, and she wasn't sure how much longer she could maintain her self-control. If she was going to save Barry, and frankly herself, she needed to leave immediately.
Tearing out the communicator from her ear, she tossed it to Sara, who bobbled it before getting a grip on it. "Someone will talk you through how to help the others," she said briefly, indicating the ship with her eyes. "Do what you can."
"Wha—wait, where are you going?" Sara stammered, still breathing heavily from her ordeal.
Kara didn't answer as her vision tunneled and her senses became dull. Her singular focus now became getting Barry help. Commanding her body to listen to her this time, she lifted him in her arms with an enormous effort, her breathing labored and her muscles shaking. With more willpower than she ever thought she possessed, she soared into flight, straining desperately to reach S.T.A.R. Labs and save them both.
You're too late.
…
Barry hoped it had all been a nightmare. Waking up to realize it wasn't was one of the worst experiences of his life.
He remembered it all. Psi had been able to surprise him and paralyze him with fear during the mob scene in Central City, and by the time he realized the unassuming human next to her was actually a Dominator messing with his senses, he couldn't defend himself as he fell under its control.
He saw, heard, and felt everything as the Dominator manipulated his body. In horror, he'd watched as the alien equipped his fists with glowing green knuckles it had gotten from who-knows-where. He'd screamed in silence as those fists took down Oliver, took down J'onn, took down Clark, took down Wally. He'd fought in vain as the alien placed transmitter after transmitter in his hands and forced him to plant them in various hidden locations around the country, knocking out the JL communication frequency in every area where Leaguers were active.
He laid hands on Kara. Attacked her. Rammed his fists into her over and over again. His mind had begged and pleaded for his body to stop, but the Dominator's control over him was too strong. His consciousness was left to watch as the woman for whom he would gladly give his life struggled against his relentless assault.
He'd tried to resist. Oh, he'd tried. Against the Dominator, he'd pushed the fullest reach of his will to try to take control. He'd been successful to a point, stopping the Dominator from using his body to kill the first Leaguer he went after. Oliver had never seen it coming, and the alien was about to push his vibrating fist through the unconscious archer's chest, but Barry's consciousness had rebelled so violently, fighting for mastery, that the Dominator settled for incapacitation. After that, the alien simply found it took less energy to knock out and kidnap rather than kill, lest Barry's mind revolt again.
To an extent, the same effort is what kept him from vibrating at just the right frequency to chew up Kara's insides. It kept him from trying for a fatal strike, but that was all he could manage. The punches he threw, and the blows he inflicted, he just couldn't stop, and it made him sick. It made him a monster.
"How is she?" were the first words out of his mouth upon waking up.
Caitlin sighed, seeming to expect the question. She looked down at him in concern as he lay on one of the beds in S.T.A.R. Labs. "You really should focus on your own rest."
"Caitlin," Barry repeated, desperation in his eyes. "How is she?"
She hesitated a moment before responding. "She's unconscious. She barely made it to our front door before she collapsed."
"Will she be okay?"
"Barry…"
"Will she be okay?"
"I don't know," Caitlin said, shaking her head. "It's really up to her now."
"What? What does that mean?" Barry asked, shaking his head in confusion.
"She took V-9," said a voice from the doorway. Barry turned his head and saw Alex observing him, leaning against the frame with her arms crossed.
"She took what?" Barry demanded, shooting upward into a sitting position. His head swam painfully, but the sudden clench in his chest at hearing that bit of news overrode it.
"Hey, you shouldn't be sitting up!" Caitlin exclaimed, trying to push him back down.
"That's how she got faster," Barry muttered, ignoring Caitlin's attempts to calm him. "How could you let her do that?!" he demanded, looking at the two women.
"She needed to save you," Alex said, coolly. Barry couldn't tell if he was imagining an accusatory tone in her voice.
"She felt it was her responsibility as one of the founders of the League," Caitlin added. "She needed a way to get past you to save everyone, and V-9 was her best shot."
Barry buried his face in his hands. He couldn't truly be angry with Caitlin, or Alex, or anyone else really, when he knew where the blame lay. He was responsible for downing the League's communication system. He was responsible for the League's capture. He was responsible for Kara's condition. "I attacked her. It's all my fault…"
"Kara wouldn't want you thinking that way."
He looked up. Alex was still regarding him from a distance. It was abundantly clear he was not her favorite person right now, but in his experience, she'd always had a good sense of Kara's feelings, and she seemed to be prioritizing them now. "It won't help her now for you to wallow in your own self pity, and if you honestly think the Girl of Steel couldn't handle a few really fast punches, you're not giving her enough credit."
"I…I'm not…," he began, but the words died in his throat. Girl of Steel Kara might be, but it was Alex who was currently holding it together with superhuman resolve, and above all else, she was reminding him that the person they both loved needed their support now. Everything else could wait. He swallowed and tried again. "How's her condition?"
"Her body is rejecting the V-9 and trying to flush it out of her system," Caitlin answered. "I've done all I can, but like I said before, it's really up to Kara and her biology now. My best guess is that if she makes it through the night, she'll be out of the woods."
"What time is it now?"
"Quarter past eight. The sun just went down."
Barry took a breath. Kara had been there for him, and now he needed to be there for her. Swinging his legs off the bed, ignoring both his nausea and Caitlin's protestations, he got unsteadily to his feet. "Where is she?"
"This way," Alex replied, tilting her head before leaving the room. Stumbling along, Barry followed.
…
That cloud looks like a puppy.
She had no idea where she was, or how she'd gotten there, but at the moment, upon opening her eyes, Kara was content to lie on her back and stare at the blue sky above her, small white clouds passing by. It took her a few more seconds to realize how weird that was.
She sat up. The last thing she remembered was the alarmingly accelerating pavement in front of S.T.A.R. Labs rushing up to meet her and the last second adjustment she'd made so that Barry would land on her rather than the other way around as they crashed from the sky. Swiveling her head, she realized she was lying on a street, surrounded by the normal shops, restaurants, and apartment complexes one would associate with your typical big city, with the glaring exception that the streets were deadly silent, without another soul in sight. She saw the Catco Worldwide Media insignia on a particularly tall skyscraper a few blocks away.
This is National City.
How did she get to National City? It was nowhere near S. . Labs. She clambered to her feet, her cape flowing in a familiar way down her back, which gave her another surprise. Looking down, she realized she was back in her classic suit, rather than the battle-ready outfit she'd flown out in to save the League. When did that happen?
"What is going on?" she muttered out loud.
"For someone who's faster than a speeding bullet, you are incredibly slow."
Turning slowly, Kara tilted her head up to regard the floating figure. Skintight black combat suit covering her from neck to feet. A small, plain, red S-shield on the right side of her chest. Blonde hair billowing in the light breeze. Same lips, but the smile was colder. Same eyes, but her glance was harder.
"You," Kara said, simply. She should have been shocked, but the voice in her head as she'd tried to save Barry suddenly made so much sense.
"Me," her opponent agreed, lightly drifting to the ground to face her. "Or you, actually. Whichever you prefer. This is happening inside your head, after all."
Kara looked around, mildly surprised that the inside of her mind structured itself like her home city, before facing her…whatever she was. "So is this a side effect of the V-9? Making me relive my worst nightmares, splitting my personality, like when I was on red K?"
Her double, the person she had been when that artificial poison had clouded her mind and tainted her senses, laughed in her face, a cruel chuckle as though making fun of someone slow. "Red K…V-9...why are you so convinced that this," she inquired, sweeping her hands up and down to indicate her own body, "only exists when you get drugged somehow?"
"Because that's the truth," Kara spat.
"No, silly girl," her double crooned. "Don't you see? All of these adventures you've had only prove my point. It doesn't matter if you get poisoned with red K. It doesn't matter if some metahumans get to you. It doesn't matter if you shoot up some speedster drug." She took a few steps forward. "Every single time, the effect is the same. You become me."
"No," Kara shook her head furiously, fighting the urge to back away from her double. "I didn't become you after taking V-9."
"Darling, what do you think is happening now?" her double asked, taking a few more steps as she spread her arms out. "When your body wakes up, it'll be me that's in control. You've already heard my voice in your head, and…well, you and I are the same, aren't we?" she teased, playfully pointing at her identical face.
"We're not!" Kara yelled, unable to keep the words from getting under her skin.
"Oh Kara, so determined to ignore the truth," the double continued, shaking her head as she stalked even closer. "I'm not a side-effect. I'm not something foreign. You just can't see that I'm who you really are, who you were always meant to become. You're fighting it, but it's only a matter of time." She walked right up to Kara's face, and Kara, completely out of sorts as to what this dream or hallucination or mind palace scenario would do, was frozen.
"Time to stop fighting. It's my turn," her double whispered, and for the briefest moment, as she stared into her own face, Kara saw her blue eyes glow a deadly red. She couldn't decide if it reminded her more of red Kryptonite or the Velocity 9 serum.
…
"She's stable for now, but her vitals are critical."
Alex wasn't sure Barry was really listening as they walked into S.T.A.R. Labs' intensive care room, where Kara lay on a medical bed surrounded by machines and dressed in a plain medical gown. She and Caitlin had peeled the battle suit off her shortly after her return as they fought to get her vitals under control. Barry simply pulled up a chair, not even thinking about his own tattered suit that he was still wearing, and sat down by her side, still not saying a word.
Even knowing the circumstances of this whole mess, Alex's emotions burned at the memory of watching Barry sink punch after punch into Kara's body. Supergirl or not, Alex would never stop wanting to protect Kara from harm, and she would have raced out to throttle Barry herself if she could have. However, standing here now, seeing the total devastation in Barry's eyes as he silently kept watch over her sister's still form, his mouth covered by his clasped hands, she knew without a doubt that the man out there guarding the Dominator ship had decidedly not been Barry Allen. She had never seen a person look at her sister with so much love, and so much heartache, as he did right now.
Sadly, she turned her eyes on Kara's motionless form. She wished she could jump into her mind, like when the Black Mercy had attacked her, and reach out to bring her back to the people whose lives would never be the same without her. Unfortunately, though, this time Kara would have to fight this on her own, and there was absolutely nothing she could do to help.
Watch it, Danvers, she caught herself. Take your own advice. No self-pity.
Caitlin had retired to an empty office elsewhere in the lab. At Alex's and Barry's insistence, Felicity and Harry had left to get some rest, Felicity staying with Iris and Harry muttering something about breaking into Cisco's empty apartment. It was just the three of them now, so Alex pulled up a chair next to Kara's bed, on the opposite side from Barry, and sat down. The two briefly made eye contact, coming to a silent understanding, and then settled in for their night-long vigil.
…
Before she could blink, Red Kara had her neck in a vice grip.
This is all in my head! Why does this feel so real?
Kara felt her body hurled with Kryptonian strength through a nearby office building. Paper, swivel chairs, and cheap fluorescent lights flew by her as she smashed clean through the opposite wall and onto the next parallel street. She had barely climbed back to her feet when Red Kara was on her again. She blocked the first couple strikes, but her opponent seemed to have an innate sense of her moves, and soon Kara found herself in a headlock.
"You're just in my head! This isn't happening!"
Red Kara clicked her tongue in disapproval, like she was lecturing a stubborn child. "Kara, of course this is in your head, but why would that mean it isn't real?"
Kara opened her mouth to respond but then immediately closed it, frowning as she wondered idly if her evil twin knew she'd just made a Harry Potter reference in the middle of trying to kill her, but given her current and very real feelings of choking, she supposed the essence of the comment was appropriate. Shifting her weight, she fought out of the hold, but another quick strike sent her back onto the pavement. She quickly pushed herself up to a knee, prepared to react to another assault, but her attacker hadn't pressed her advantage, instead regarding her contemptuously with her arms crossed.
"Can't understand why I'm beating you?" Red Kara taunted. "You think our moves should be identical?"
Kara seethed at how her opposite was guessing all her thoughts.
"I know you, Kara Danvers," her double continued, emphasizing her last name with mock air quotes. "You and the humans. You fight for them. You try to fit in with them. You love them," she said, wrinkling her nose in disgust. "I've tried to get you to forget all of that, claim your true calling as Kara Zor-El, but you're so stubborn."
"What are you talking about?" Kara asked, narrowing her eyes suspiciously.
"Come on, Kara, don't act like you don't remember."
My nightmare, before my panic attack, Kara thought bitterly. She said nothing, but again, her twin guessed at her thoughts.
"The dream was a little on the nose, I'll admit, but your mind was vulnerable after those metahuman attacks." Lazily, Red Kara began ticking off her fingers. "Your duty. Your family. Your love. You'd be so much better, so much stronger, if you left that all behind. If you let them all die."
The broken bodies from her dream pushed their way into her mind's eye. She shook her head. "You're lying. You want me to believe you caused that dream?" Kara tried to give off a brave laugh. "That was just Rainbow Raider and Psi messing with my head. You just want me to think you're more powerful than you are."
Red Kara shrugged in response. "Have it your way, then. You know the bottom line. You know I'm only telling you the truth."
"What you want isn't leaving everything behind. It's burning everything to the ground," Kara retorted angrily.
"Same difference," Red Kara replied airily. "All I've done is try to get you to follow a better way, your rightful way, because I know what you are, and what you can be."
"Is there a point somewhere in this monologue?"
Red Kara rolled her eyes, still taking on the attitude of a frustrated teacher. "My point, Kara, is that you, on the other hand, don't know me. You can't fathom me or what I can do or what I represent in you." A rush of air, and Red Kara was in front of her, a fistful of her suit in her left hand. Once again, Kara was just a breath too slow to react.
"You can't see that I'm better than you."
Kara made a move to break the hold, but Red Kara quickly smashed her forehead into Kara's face. A subsequent knee into her gut forced the air from her lungs, and once again she was forcibly thrown into another building, cratering the concrete wall before collapsing forward onto the pavement. Pushing herself up painfully, she noticed a bright red smear on the ground beneath her. Gingerly, her hand shaking slightly, she touched her fingers to her mouth, felt the shock when she saw the blood on them.
Looking up, she watched her double smirk triumphantly. Sickeningly, in that instance, Kara truly could see into the mind of her alter ego, and she knew that Red Kara was gleeful at having drawn blood. It was arguably the most visual sign of weakness a Kryptonian could show on this planet. In Red Kara's mind, it just confirmed everything she'd been claiming.
Is she right?
Kara hadn't landed a single hit. She was faced with herself and yet she was second-guessing everything. She was already bleeding. What if she couldn't win? What if anger, and power, and hatred, really were stronger? She'd already admitted it to Alex after her panic attack. Those feelings inside her didn't come from nowhere, and for someone like her, those feelings were dangerous.
Wobbling as she struggled to her feet, Kara staggered forward a few steps with her arms held up weakly to defend herself, and looking across from her, she couldn't help but see strength. Resolve. Full ownership. Red Kara knew who she was and how she felt. She didn't have to question the impulses that ran through her mind. She embraced them. Kara had tried her whole life to live up, not just to her cousin's example, but to the example she held for herself, as someone who'd use her gifts to accomplish as much good in the world as she could. How could she do that when the instincts that produced the doppelgänger in front of her lived in some dark corner of her subconscious? What if it wasn't as simple as just avoiding red K or V-9?
Red Kara grew, if possible, even more smug as she sauntered towards her. "You see? You can't stop me." Cracking her knuckles, she strode to within arm's reach. "It's time to reach our full potential." She pulled back her arm. "Unfortunately, that doesn't include you." Her fist flew forward.
…
As the night wore on, Alex and Barry settled into an unspoken routine. At least one of them was with Kara at all times whenever the other one needed to use the bathroom or get more coffee for the both of them. Neither of them got up at the same time, as if the motion and noise of two people around Kara was simply unacceptable. Most small changes in Kara's vitals Alex had enough expertise to interpret, but if she was ever less than absolutely certain, Barry would speed out to ask Caitlin, who was also barely sleeping anyway.
It was Barry's turn to be restless, and he alternated between pacing just outside the doorway and leaning against the arch while maintaining his worried vigil, leaving Alex sitting next to Kara's bed. They'd observed odd changes in Kara's brain activity as the hours passed, but unless and until something drastic happened, they could do nothing but watch and wait. Alex's hands were both wrapped around one of her sister's, and she spoke softly to it, not wanting to disturb her and yet desperately wishing she'd wake up.
"You always tossed and turned in your sleep, when you first came to live with us," Alex said, remembering the days when the two of them shared a room, at first by parental command, and later by choice. "I thought it was annoying. I wanted any reason to find something else wrong with you. But I also knew you were still grieving what you'd lost, and it made me feel guilty for…for wanting my life to go back to the way it was."
She lifted her eyes dejectedly to look at Kara now, so still and peaceful on the medical bed, the electrodes stuck onto her forehead notwithstanding. "Kara, I know sometimes you feel like you need to justify yourself being here. You're afraid that people will start to fear you, and that if you slip up, we'll abandon you." Her fingers momentarily gripped the hand between them more tightly. "I just…I just want you to know that I'll never abandon you. You're not perfect, you're not infallible, and I wouldn't have it any other way. You're my sister, and you're my family. "
Alex blinked and sniffed a couple times, determined not to shed tears, not now. "You make me stronger, Kara," she finished. Looking up and around, she saw Barry leaning against the doorway, able to hear every word, but she found it hurt to look into his face, since it reflected the same constant thought she was having. They both just wanted her back.
…
You make me stronger, Kara.
Alex? Kara thought. Without even processing her own intent, she deflected Red Kara's incoming punch and took control of her arm, swinging her body around so that her back faced Red Kara's front. Jamming her hips backward, Kara tightened her grip on her opponent's arm and forcibly flipped her over her shoulder, slamming Red Kara into the pavement so violently that the ground cracked beneath her.
Dropping the arm in surprise, Kara immediately jumped back into a defensive posture, preparing for a counterattack, but her double seemed just as shocked as she was. It took another few seconds for Kara to realize her thoughts had drifted to Alex, and she had just channeled one of her sister's favorite fighting techniques, the same one they'd just started working on.
Red Kara scrambled to her feet, her face impossible to describe with any other word than "pissed." She glared fiercely. "How did you do that?"
Kara's smile became easy as her confidence began to grow. "Looks like there're things about me you can't figure out either."
Growling, Red Kara sped forward, going after Kara with a flurry of punches, but Kara handily blocked and countered every strike. She had no idea how long this fight had been happening, either in her mind or in real time, but it was only now that she started feeling in control, like realizing she was in a dream while she was still dreaming. She had never pulled off Alex's throw before, but now she could feel herself dictating the terms of this whole mental experience, willing herself to channel all of Alex's fighting expertise.
Clearly getting angry, Red Kara charged forward, trying to knock Kara off balance, but Kara took advantage of her overreach, dodging and slamming her elbow in her opponent's face. Staggering back, Red Kara touched her hand to her nose, seeing blood when she pulled her fingers back. Kara cocked her eyebrow. "Now we're even," she taunted.
At this point, her double abandoned all pretense of making their grudge match slow and personal. Releasing a guttural scream of rage, Red Kara took to the sky and immediately shot at Kara with her heat vision. Kara dodged and went airborne as well, only to have to dodge again to avoid a blast of freeze breath. She flew in to counterattack but had to switch to defense as Red Kara put on a burst of superspeed to try to catch her off guard and regain the upper hand.
On and on they went, the both of them emptying their repertoire of Kryptonian superpowers when they weren't pummeling each other hand-to-hand. Charred lines of destruction raced around Kara's mental recreation of National City as streams of heat vision shot back and forth. Windows blasted out and buildings collapsed as superbreath and superstrength sent both Girls of Steel plunging through the concrete structures. At one point, Kara got blasted by her own trick, as her twin slammed her palms together right in front of her, the concussive wave sending her into the pavement. When she shook her head and looked up, Red Kara was already flying towards her, a car held up above her head.
She ached all over her body from their endless brawling, her suit torn in several places, one eye bruised and rapidly swelling, and blood from her forehead matting her hair. Red Kara didn't look any better, but the pure rage in her face gave her a manic quality, as though she was playing a game of endurance chicken that she absolutely refused to lose. Even if Kara had willed this mental version of herself to even the odds, she was starting to worry that her evil twin would simply outlast her.
I have to end this.
…
Hours had passed, and now it was Alex's turn to stand restlessly. She leaned against a counter, arms crossed and eyes staring at the floor. Barry couldn't blame her. As much as they wanted to keep constant watch over Kara, it was just so hard to look at her in this state. For maybe the hundredth time, as he sat next to her shoulder, he reached out and gently stroked her hair above her forehead, ostensibly to brush away a loose strand, but that excuse had stopped holding water after the third or fourth time. He really just kept hoping she'd respond to his touch, the way she would when they woke up together in the mornings.
Privately, he continued to wrestle with his guilt over the part he'd played in getting Kara into this state. He knew Alex was right that Kara wouldn't want him blaming himself, and he knew the thoughts did nothing useful for her now, but he couldn't stop dwelling over his role in incapacitating the League and forcing her to extremes. However, at the same time, he also couldn't help feeling, if possible, even more impressed and proud by Kara's pure strength and bravery. She had taken a speed drug with an extremely dubious history of past users, and instead of being ruled by its effects, she had effectively harnessed its power to do what she had to do. All on her own, she'd saved the League, and him as well.
Well, perhaps not on her own. Barry knew she'd be the first to credit Alex, Caitlin, Felicity, and Harry for helping her accomplish something of such a scale. That's probably what made her so special and occasionally so infuriating, and what made him love her so deeply. She always put the highest value on others, never hesitating to take on more than her fair share of the burden.
He exhaled in frustration, bowing his head and grabbing fistfuls of his own hair with both hands. "This is all so messed up," he muttered. "I wish I hadn't been so stupid, letting myself get taken down by that psychic meta. I wish someone else had been able to stop me first." He looked back up at her, lying on the medical cot. "I wish you hadn't used V-9."
He sniffed a couple times to maintain his composure. "It was reckless," he scolded angrily, building up steam. "It was risky. It was impulsive. It could cost you your life." Taking another breath, he then shook his head sadly as he got up from the chair to lean against her bed, softly cupping her cheek in one hand. "And it was the bravest thing I think I've ever seen anyone do."
Of course, she didn't respond. His thumb traced small circles on her cheek as she continued to lay there, her hair fanning out around her face, looking for all the world as though she was simply asleep. "As the Flash, I know I have to set an example, to inspire people to be the best versions of themselves." He leaned a little closer, shifting his hand to the top of her head. "But as Barry, as your Barry," he continued, softly, "I'm inspired by you every day, Kara Danvers. You make me a better hero." Closing his eyes, he gently placed a kiss on her forehead before leaning back, resuming his seat in his chair.
He felt Alex looking at him, so he glanced up, but the residual hardness she, either consciously or not, had been directing at him throughout the night had dissipated. There was no question that they were hoping for the same thing.
…
You make me a better hero.
Barry, Kara smiled, without even fully knowing why. Red Kara had just begun the motion of hurling the car she was carrying over her head, but everything to Kara had started to slow down. She felt a warm tingle throughout her body, a far more pure feeling than what the V-9 had induced, and she suddenly understood.
She got her feet underneath her and pushed off towards the sky, blasting into flight. Lightning trailed in her wake as she went straight at her double, the car still barely on its way towards her as she slammed into Red Kara far faster than either of them expected. Adjusting, Kara turned over and hurled Red Kara towards the ground, only to speed past her and land one final horizontal shot, ensuring that her twin's limp form crashed through a couple buildings before crumbling to the pavement.
Sensing the end of the fight was near, Kara flew over and landed next to her opponent, fists on her hips. Breathing heavily, groaning, and covered in dust and blood, Red Kara struggled to get back to her feet. Perhaps hoping to catch Kara off guard, she lurched forward, almost drunkenly swinging one punch after another, but Kara just kept dodging, streaks of lightning dancing along her movements as she reappeared to her double's left, to her right, and behind her, her fists never leaving her hips. Something had triggered her mind to invoke Barry's speed, and now Red Kara was on her desperate last gasps.
Finally, perhaps out of pure frustration, Red Kara leapt into the air, attempting a knockout blow from above, but by this point Kara's newfound speed was unmatchable. She flew up, caught Red Kara in midair, and slammed her back into the ground, her hand on her double's throat. She pulled back her other fist to finally end her tormentor.
Coughing, spitting out blood, Red Kara refused to go quietly. "You'll never get rid of me," she taunted. "I'm a part of you."
Kneeling there, her weight holding her mirror image down as she prepared for the finishing blow, Kara gazed into her own face and was forced to appreciate for the first time how her own features looked when she was angry. Jealous. Afraid.
She hated it. She hated what these ugly feelings did to her. Fundamentally, though, beneath the blood and the bruises and the dirt, she found she couldn't ignore something else.
She was still the same.
Not in the way Red Kara wanted her to believe, though. She wasn't the tyrannical, power-obsessed alien currently on the ground at her mercy, but it was a lie to say she never had the awful feelings her double proudly advertised, and in spite of Red Kara's vitriol, she still had the same eyes as Kara. The same body. The same heart.
Looking at this perverse but superficially identical version of herself, Kara had a moment of clarity. By themselves, these terrible feelings that sometimes floated through her mind didn't define her. They didn't make her a monster. Her evil twin represented a choice, a possibility of which she'd forever have to remain cautious, but she was just that. A choice, not destiny. At the end of the day, Kara realized she didn't have to be afraid of how far she could fall. With her loved ones at her side, she'd always find her way as a force for good, whether her path took her forwards, backwards, down, or up, up, and away.
"You are a part of me," Kara admitted finally, letting go of her double, lowering her fist, and standing up. Shaking her head, the conviction absolute in her voice, she finished, "But you're not who I am."
At her words, Red Kara's form began to lighten and fade away, but Kara could still see her double's eyes narrow, whether out of hatred or grudging respect she couldn't tell, and at that point, it didn't matter. Within seconds, Kara was alone in her dream, and looking up, she saw that the National City of her mind had completely restored itself, all the damage and all the ruined buildings suddenly erased in favor of tranquility. Sighing, Kara let the corners of her mouth tilt up just slightly as she leaned her head back and closed her eyes.
…
She could feel the little smile still on her face even as her eyelids cracked open.
She was in a different medical lab from the one in which she'd woken to a panic attack, as this room had no hole in its roof. She felt herself covered in the medical gown and was relieved to be out of the aggressive, alternate Supergirl suit she'd been wearing. Alex had fallen asleep on one side of her, her sister's hand clasping Kara's while her other arm cushioned her head. On Kara's other side, Barry was asleep as well, the top of his head nestled against her hip. Her mind still in a bit of a fog, it was nevertheless now obvious to her why her mind specifically tapped into thoughts of them for support during her mental struggle.
Gently, she squeezed Alex's hand while putting her other hand on top of Barry's head, waking them both up. The way both their faces lit up upon seeing her awake was more healing than anything Kara could have asked for.
Alex hugged her first, gently, using both of her arms to pull Kara's head into her. "I am so glad you're okay," she whispered.
"Me too," Kara replied, pressing her face into Alex's shoulder. They had matching tears forming in their eyes when they pulled back to look at each other, but the joy in their faces was undeniable as well.
"Why do you do this to me?" Alex asked, not for the first time, smiling in exasperation.
"Because I'm your sister and you love me," Kara replied, repeating an exchange the two of them had had many times before and likely would have many more times in the future. Alex tilted her head to the side and chuckled, never having a good comeback to such a simple truth.
Barry was next. "I'm so sorry, Kara," he began, his voice muffled against her shoulder. "I'm so—"
Kara shook her head as she held Barry tightly against her with her arm. Smiling a little to herself, she joked, "You didn't kill me, so my day is looking up," recalling the same thing he said to her when Dominators had attacked the first time. Barry laughed, remembering as well. Pulling back slightly, she placed on a hand on his cheek. "It's not your fault."
She could tell by his eyes that Barry wasn't completely over this, and that they'd probably still have to talk about it in the days to come, but right now all they needed from one other was support. Barry leaned his face into her hand, the two of them reveling in each other's touch again. "I love you," he said.
"I love you, too," she said, smiling as they leaned into a kiss.
Hearing footsteps, everyone turned to see a bleary-eyed Caitlin walk into the lab, having spent a fitful night in her office. Her smile of relief, however, mirrored the ones on all of their faces as she saw Kara hugging her loved ones. "Well, that's a good sign," she commented.
"Is she going to be okay?" Barry asked, his arm around Kara's shoulders while Alex held her hand.
Going to a computer, Caitlin began scanning Kara's vital readings. "I think so," she replied, the relief clear in her voice. "Everything looks stable, but I would still advise taking it easy and resting since—"
Which is as far as she could get, as Kara was so excited to hear that her vitals were normal that she immediately sat up. Suddenly, a wave of nausea overcame her, and she promptly tilted over the side of the bed and vomited on the ground, right next to Barry's feet.
"…since the V-9 might still leave other side effects," Caitlin finished, looking down at the sick now splattering the floor.
Kara groaned, the dizziness not going away as Barry's hands slid up the sides of her head, carefully gathering her long hair away from her mouth.
"Gross," Alex pointed out unnecessarily, leaning over to rub Kara's back.
…
"Why aren't you resting at Barry's place?" Alex asked.
"Barry said Joe makes the best homemade chicken soup," Kara replied.
"He does," Barry confirmed.
"I do," Joe called out from the kitchen.
"You both have superspeed," Alex persisted. "You two each have your own homes in Central City and National City. Why do you always end up here?"
The only response she received was laughter from everyone. "Don't bother, Alex," Joe called out, still bustling around the kitchen. "I've tried having this conversation with them already."
"Whatever," Alex said, surrendering the point. "I really should get going, though. Let you get your rest."
"I'm getting plenty of rest the way things are," Kara insisted.
"Okay, honestly, I've just had enough of third-wheeling the two of you," Alex shot back, looking meaningfully at her and Barry.
"I don't know what you're talking about," Kara replied, snuggling into Alex and readjusting her head on her sister's shoulder. "Barry's the third wheel here."
"It's true. I accepted that long ago," Barry quipped.
They were indeed back at Joe's house, on the couch watching television. Kara was spread out liberally, one might even argue luxuriously, on the couch, leaning against Alex at one end while her legs were firmly planted in Barry's lap at the other. She was still weak and nauseous after waking up that morning, and since she'd gotten confirmation that Sara had been able to free the rest of the League, she decided to listen to Caitlin's advice.
A small jump at both ends of the couch caused Alex and Barry to check their phones. "J'onn says the DEO's tracked down both Psi and Rainbow Raider. They're getting locked up," Alex reported.
"The League's sweeping around the world, tracking down Dominator transmitters and looking for anything like the ship you found," Barry added, reading off his phone. "It looks like that Dominator was a rogue agent, though. Working alone."
"Good," Kara said, "because let me tell you, Kryptonian biology and speedster drugs?" She exhaled dramatically. "Really bad combination. Let's not do that again."
"No arguments here." The group lapsed into peaceful silence for a few minutes, not really watching the screen in front of them so much as just appreciating a crisis ending with everyone coming out okay.
Alex's phone began to ring. She checked it, then said, "Oh Kara, get up. I have to take this."
"No," Kara replied, pinning her sister's body underneath her.
"Seriously, Kara. Get off me!"
"No!"
"Kara, it's Maggie! I want to talk to her."
"Fine," Kara groaned, making an exaggerated show of moving her body so that her sister could stand up. "Go talk to your girlfriend. Leave me here," she pouted.
Alex shook her head. "You are so much work, you know that?"
"Hmmph," Kara grunted. As Alex headed into an adjoining room, Kara let go of her bit and turned her head, calling out, "Tell Maggie I said hi. And that I'm fine." Alex nodded to indicate she'd heard before walking out.
Deprived of her human pillow, Kara shifted around to lean into Barry instead, who opened his arms up automatically, his eyes never coming off the television. "By the way, Alex can say that to me, not you," she said, getting comfortable as his arms wrapped around her.
"What, that you're so much work, or that you need to get off?" he teased, as her head found a crook underneath his chin.
"Yes," she replied simply. She felt his lips smile into the top of her head.
They sat for a while, Barry's thumb making small circles on her shoulder, happy to be in each other's arms once again. "I know you've still got recovering to do," Barry began, "but whenever you feel like talking about what happened, I'm here. We all are."
Kara nodded slowly. She'd told the team briefly of the mental duel she'd had, but while she knew they had a sense of how significant the experience had been for her, she hadn't had the strength to go over everything in detail just yet. It wasn't like a switch had been flipped and she could suddenly, perfectly handle all of her demons. Far from it. Still, it had been a meaningful encounter, and anything that reaffirmed the support she had from the people she loved was an encounter worth appreciating.
"I know," Kara replied, smiling to herself. "That's what I'm counting on."
/end
…
Author's notes: A couple lines of direct dialogue are taken from Supergirl 1x01, "Pilot," and The Flash 3x08, "Invasion!"
Thanks for giving this story a chance. I really do appreciate it.