Hello! I hope you're all having a good weekend. Thank you again for the favorites, follows, and reviews. I would love to hear what you all think.
I do not own Criminal Minds
Emily woke with a start. Her heart was beating fast and she was covered with a sheen of sweat. She sat up and frantically looked around until she finally remembered where she was. The dream had felt so real. It had been like being back there. She wanted to get those images out of her head. It was all she could see. Their faces.
Emily grabbed her cane from where it was leaning against the bedside table and stood. It was still dark out, only three in the morning. She sighed, sleep had been hard to come by since she had left the hospital.
Emily limped out of the room and down the hall to the bathroom. She turned on the light and closed the door. Once the shower was going and steam had started to fill the small room, Emily removed her clothes. She looked at the small cuts across her chest and shoulder and then down on her legs. They were starting to heal, and soon the deeper ones would become scars.
The cut on her leg was much worse. It was deeper and more jagged. It was still tender to the touch and hurt every time she took a step. Emily wrapped it up to protect the stitches and then stepped into the shower.
The hot water poured over her face and she turned the water as hot as she could stand it. She kept thinking about the dream and how real it had felt. She wanted more than anything to have those images out of her head. Anything to stop remembering what had happened.
And as she stood there she couldn't stop thinking about how she should be dead. She shouldn't have survived that night when others hadn't. She would give anything for them to be alive instead of her.
Emily brought her hands up to her face, trying to stop. She should be dead, but she was here.
But she knew what she had to do. The only thing that could stop the nightmares, the thoughts, the fear. She had to know what had happened. She had to know how it could have happened. They had spent months planning. Months going over details, pounding out cover stories. Months doing recon.
And somehow it had still ended like this.
She would have stayed at Interpol and used her resources to find out what had gone wrong. But they were investigating her. They wanted to know what had gone wrong too. And right now she was the easiest answer.
Because she hadn't been able to save them. She hadn't been able to keep her team safe.
So she had to leave. If there was nothing she could do there, there was no reason to stay.
But what was she doing here? Why had she chosen to show up on JJ's front porch?
All she knew was that she wanted to see her. Needed to see her.
She was looking for something. Something that she hadn't had since she left the BAU. She was looking for a friend.
But that wasn't true either. At the very least, it wasn't everything.
It had been after that case in Denver so many years ago. The one that had left Emily questioning her future. JJ had sat with her on the plane. They hadn't talked much, but after the plane had landed, JJ had invited her over for a glass of wine.
Emily had almost refused. She had almost gone back to her apartment alone. Instead, she went to JJ's and they stayed up half the night talking. It was then that she knew. She knew she wanted to be with JJ, but she knew she couldn't. It was the job.
But now there was no job. Still, there were reasons to keep her feelings to herself. JJ wasn't interested in her. Emily knew that, but she couldn't change how she felt. However much she tried, her thoughts always came back to JJ.
And that was the real reason she had come back.
XXX
JJ woke up to a beeping on her phone. She rolled over and looked at her alarm clock, it was just past six. She grabbed her phone, dreading the message telling her to come in for a case. But instead she had to read the text twice to assure herself she had read it correctly. Hotch had given them the morning off. Apparently JJ wasn't the only one worn out from the past few weeks.
She rolled back over and thought about trying to fall back asleep, but she knew she wouldn't be able to. She stayed in her bed and stared up at the ceiling.
And then, as they always did, her thoughts went to Emily. Emily who was here. Emily who was in her house. Emily who was just on the other side of the wall.
And JJ almost thought it was a dream.
Because it was the same dream she had been having for years.
But she had to remind herself, Emily wasn't here to stay. And as it always did, their time together would have to end. When one of them left. When one of them walked away. Out of duty, out of dedication, out of necessity.
But for now, for right now in this moment, JJ smiled. Because Emily was here. And even if it wasn't for long, she was here.
Emily was here.
XXX
Emily took a sip of her large black coffee, JJ sat across from her holding a latte in her hand and smiled. They were sitting in a coffee shop a few blocks away from JJ's.
"God, it's good to see you," JJ said.
"It's been too long," Emily agreed, "I've got almost a year's worth of stuff to get caught up on!"
JJ laughed, "not a whole lot has changed since you've left. More cases, more UNSUBS. What about you? How's London?"
"Lot's of paperwork," Emily sighed, "leading the London office comes with its fair share of bureaucracy."
"Do you miss the field?"
Emily shrugged, "sometimes."
JJ nodded, "and how's Mark?"
"He got assigned to the Sydney office, we're not together anymore," Emily said and then quickly took a sip of coffee.
"Oh," JJ said, "I'm sorry."
She shrugged. "It's alright, it just didn't work out. Are you seeing anyone?" Emily asked, trying to change the subject.
"Nope," JJ shook her head, "you know how it is with the job."
Emily laughed, "believe me, I know all too well."
JJ looked down at her watch and groaned, "unfortunately Hotch only gave us the morning off, so I need to head out in a few minutes."
"Well I'm glad we could get coffee and catch up," Emily smiled.
"Same," JJ smiled back, "I'm so glad you could come visit."