It was May 5, 2005. The year when the bad Star Wars prequels ended, when the worst hurricane struck the US, and when I was just a little angel frolicking on the schoolyard. There was I, Lori Loud, 6 years old, consistent role model for Royal Woods' prestigious kindergarten school. My teachers saw me as an angel, and so are my fellow classmates. Well, not all see me like that.
Lori is playing hopscotch by the school entrance, waiting for her dad to show up. She is on her blue dress, blue bow and brown shoes. She is gaily and carefree as usual. A teacher abruptly comes across her.
She greets in a polite fashion, "Hello Mr. Abrams. You look good today!"
"Oh, thanks Lori!" her teacher with thick glasses, messy hair and red plaid shirt replies, "Off to my adventure to you know where."
And in unison, they exclaim, "In space!"
"Well gotta go. See you!" her teacher replies.
Afterwards, Lori's rival but kind classmate, Carol Pingrey, comes across her.
"Hey Lori!" Carol greets to her.
"Hey Carol!" Lori greets back.
"You're so great in class. I like it when you keep on handing us tarts. You know, with your good heart, I wish I could be like you," Carol compliments Lori.
"Why thank you Carol," Lori replies with a pat on Carol's head, "Never thought I would ever hear you say nice things to me."
"That was nothing. So…can I play with you?" Carol politely asks.
"Why is that?" Lori replies.
"Actually that is my spot you are playing on," Carol implies.
"Oh, I'm sorry Carol. I got this spot first," Lori rudely replies.
"But I drew that court at break time. I have to borrow chalk."
"Well, I guess you have to find another spot to draw. This is my spot now."
"Well…okay," Carol says sadly, "But we can share it right?"
Lori laughs at this, but replies, "No."With this, Carol forlornly moves away, in search of a new spot to play hopscotch. Lori sneers evilly, "Thinking she could be like me? Or even play with me? Jokes on her!"
I love it that time. Everything was going my way. The whole world was at the grasp of my hands. Until the worst arrived on that day. No offense.
Just as she waits by the drawn hopscotch court, Lori's dad, Lynn Sr., arrives on his van, accidentally splashing the then 6-year-old in the process.
"Ohh, Lori! Sorry about that," Lynn Sr. apologizes to his soaked daughter, "You okay honey?"
"Daddy!" Lori complains.
"Sorry about that honey. But we have no time. We gotta go!" her dad says hurryingly. He then rushes Lori to the back of the van, fastens the seatbelt for her and leaves in a jiffy. Lynn Sr.'s driving is in high velocity as he swerves every vehicle that blocks his way.
"Daddy, why we are so fast?" Lori curiously asks.
"No time to explain honey!" Lynn Sr. replies, "We have to fetch your other sisters right away!"
At that time, I didn't know what is going on with that. Was he really a reckless driver? Was he on the run from the police? Was he really showing off his drag racing skills? Or anything like that? But one thing is certainly true: that this is going to be heck of an adventure with my sisters.
Lynn Sr.'s plan is to fetch all of Lori's sisters and take them to the one place where someone is going to be welcomed in the Loud family. Next stop is at Leni's preschool, where she was a gentle student but was the butt of many jokes from her classmates, due to being a ditz. Leni, at that time, was dressed in her teal dress and ponytail, much more like what dresses currently.
"Hey Leni, nice dinosaur toy!" one classmate with buck teeth and mullet hair teases Leni, who is holding a plush dinosaur, "I dunno who's dumber: the dinosaur or you?" This makes her classmates laugh evenly.
"Dinosaur? This is my pet dog, Rory," Leni replies dumbly, causing her classmates to roar in laughter.
"It's true. I have a pet dog. I'm going to feed him, and walk him and teach him tricks."
Suddenly, Lynn Sr. arrives to fetch her. He gets down from the van and picks up Leni. But the scatterbrained sister bumps herself on the side of the van, in an attempt to get in.
Next stop is Luna's nursery school. Dressed in a purple dress and donned on her beautiful long hair, Luna was once a gentle kid. However, she gets enamored by music, specifically rock. As she waits for her dad, the soon-to-be rocker watches a house music band rehearse for an event. She enjoys the music immediately, when she bangs her head in enjoyment.
"This is awesome!" Luna replies while humming to the jam.
Recurrently, Lynn Sr. appears hastily and drags Luna to the van. She tries to get a final glimpse on the band, but they slip away in a flash.
Next stop is Luan's daycare center, where the Loud sibling is pretty much a prop comic and a mild prankster to her peers. On that day, Luan, in her yellow dress, offers a gift to a male classmate with orange hair and freckles.
"Hey there, Aaron. Want a chocolate treat?" Luan asks."Sure," Aaron replies.
"Here's some…sneakers!" Luan exclaims as she shows a smelly and muddy sneaker to him, scaring Aaron in the process. Luan keeps on laughing, despite Aaron fleeing. "Hehehe. Get it?"
Lynn Sr. suddenly bursts and carries Luan to the van. "Sorry Luan for the wait. We gotta go!"
"Hey dad, I showed Aaron my new sneakers but they got muddy. But I didn't mean to shoe him away. Hehehe. Get it?" Luan utters jokingly.
"Well, that was really funny, honey," Lynn Sr. replies as he boards Luan in the van, "But we have to fetch your sister, Lynny. Hey, that rhymes!"
And with that, Lynn Sr. heads to the last stop, Lynn being babysat by a group of teenagers (who are kind of punkish and hipster-looking). They stop at their loft, where the porch is occupied by the said group of teenagers. Lynn Sr. honks at them, telling "Hey! Why you kids are outside? Aren't you supposed to watch my daughter?"
"We were," the ring leader, a girl with black hair with a little ponytail and an all-around goth look (think of her like Sam Manson), replies, "Until she keeps ruining the house. So we thought of hanging her until she tires."
As he learns about this, Lynn Sr. enters their loft to see Lynn throwing various things around like a professional baseball pitcher. She so happily does this on her signature red shirt and diapers.
"Oh Lynn, why do you keep this?" the Loud family patriarch asks himself as he picks up Lynn, who keeps banging her daddy's chest. "Enough. Junior. Junior!" Despite his insistence, the 2-year-old Lynn Jr. keeps poking her dad's head with a nerf bat. He then heads off to his van, not before saying this to the teenagers, "Sorry kids, gonna take care of that later." Despite their annoyance (mostly from the ring leader) to the carnage, Lynn Sr. assures, "Have to rush now! Wife's giving birth!"
"Glad you're lucky that we give you pass from your wife giving birth," the ring leader replies, as Lynn Sr. rushes to the hospital. He drifts nonstop that he doesn't mind his children being pushed around. After a series of drifts that would make Vin Diesel jealous, the family stops at a jammed intersection, blocks away from the Royal Woods General Hospital.
"Come on, come on, come on!" Lynn Sr. utters nervously as he anxiously wait for the traffic to get looser.
"Daddy, where we going?" Lori asks hastily, "And why we're in a big hurry?
"With no other choice, Lynn Sr. answers, "Lori, we're going to the hospital, okay?"
"What's a 'house-petal'?" Leni asks, "Is it a kind of flower?"
"No Leni…" Luna answers, but Lori interrupts her.
"Yes, dear Leni, it's a flower," Lori answers in a foolishly teasing manner, "A flower that can rip you to shreds and take away your life."
This scares Leni, making her clench her plush toy. "Oh no, we're going to a house full of flowers that are gonna kill us?" she terrifyingly asks.
"Well Leni, close to that," Lynn Sr. clarifies, "Just playing. Your mom is getting ready…for your new baby brother."
"Baby brother?" Lori utters. Then, so does the rest of the sisters.
"Yes girls, you're gonna have a baby brother," Lynn Sr. confirms officially, making the Loud sisters excited.
"I can't wait to cuddle him!" Leni excitingly utters."I can't wait to sing him lullabies!" Luna adds sweetly.
"I can't wait to give him my jokes!" Luan follows cheeringly.
Then Lynn mumbles hearteningly, since she has not yet uttered her first word.
However, Lori is less excited than they are.
"What's wrong Lori? Aren't you excited to see our new pet brother?" Leni notices her rather unenthusiastic mode.
"What? No!" Lori stresses, hiding her denial, "First of all Leni, brothers are not pets. Humans cannot be pets. Second, of course I am excited."
The oldest sister tries so hard to smile widely to hide her begrudges, but Leni interrogates her, "Oh really?" Lori nods in hesitation, making Leni reply as she snuggles her plush dinosaur, "Okay. But I am more than excited to see him. If I do, I would cuddle him like my pet doggy here."
"Yeah, right…" Lori utters.
But I was less than excited. I was befuddled by that news. Not that I do not want another brother or sister. But I was satisfied with having four sisters. And I am going to get a brother for that instance? Remember the time that I told you I was not an angel to anyone. Well, there was this boy named Alan in my class. He was as clumsy and ditzy as Leni. And one day, I saw him about to get hit by a school bus. But I saved him at the last minute. The whole school looked at my heroic act with respect that I was thought to be an angel. For Alan, he owed his life for me. So, he did many stuff for me. At first, I was trying to use him to do everything I want. But I soon get fed up for his obnoxious acts of service. That is when I soon learned that he actually likes me. I tried to point out that we could just be "brother and sister". But he denies it. I don't want my plans to get ruined by his pursuit. So I rejected him. But he's still in denial. Until now, he is still pursuing me. As for me that time, I don't want any bump in the road to show up, especially my upcoming brother.
The family finally arrives at the Royal Woods General Hospital and rush to the nurses' concierge.
"For Rita Loud! It's her husband," Lynn Sr. confirms to one nurse.
The nurse looks at the records "She's in the ICU, still giving birth. We need you in there, Mr. Loud.""Oh thanks!" he replies, "Oh, just one more question. Where can I put my kids?"
The nurse then peeks on the girls, who are trying to look behaved and innocent in a very unfamiliar realm. "Hmmm five girls, ehh?" she utters, "Well, we have just the room for them."
The nurse then takes them to a doctor's lounge, which has two blue couches, a wooden table, an ashtray?, a bookshelf and a TV. Which, for the kids, is a definition of boring.
"You can leave them here. Our intern Patrick can watch over them," the nurse states. She then pokes a roll of newspaper to the intern, who is as behaved as the anthropomorphic starfish he was named after.
"Ahh! Ahh! Don't move! I'm warning you!" Patrick says in alert as he gets up in salute."Intern, watch over these kids. And no monkey business. Or you don't want to end up cleaning the ER equipment!" the head nurse says.
"Yes ma'am!" he responds.
Lynn Sr. then reasons to his children for what is to come, "Alright kids, daddy is going to be out for a little while, to guide your mommy on giving birth to your baby brother."
"But we want to come with you!" Leni says.
"Yeah dad!" Luna and Luan agree in unison.
"Now kids, I know you're excited for your baby brother," the Loud family patriarch says, "But you have to wait here first, okay?"
"Okay…" Leni, Luna, Luan and Lynn (in mumbles) utter in dismay.
"Lori, look out for your sister, okay? I'm counting on you, big girl."
"Well…sure daddy…" Lori responds.
"Okay, we'll be back soon with your baby brother," Lynn Sr. assures as he is guided by the head nurse to the emergency room.
Meanwhile, back at the lounge, Patrick assures this to the clueless Loud sisters, "Okay little girls, now we're going to make things a little different here. If you do any trouble, I swear that you'll never see the light of day. I am keeping my eyes on you!"
Five minutes later, the scatterbrained nursing intern gets asleep on the job. The TV shows Cinemax presenting a screening of Pistol Whipped starring Steven Seagal. And the Loud sisters are doing their menial stuff to pass the time. Lori is painfully waiting for time to pass by. Leni is petting her 'pet dog'. Luna is singing to a lyric she heard a while ago: "I can't get no satisfaction." Luan is blowing an empty juice packet with a straw. And Lynn is playing with her tennis ball like a cat.
"Luna, can you stop singing?" Lori asks insistently.
"Sorry sis. I can't get over this song at school," Luna replies, "'I can't get no satisfaction!'"
Because of this, Lori gets enraged. However, Luan's juice packet gets inflated and shoots suddenly to Lori's face, enraging her more.
"Sorry sis, didn't straw that coming. Hehehe. Get it?" Luan jokingly says.
Reaching to her breaking point, Lori quarrels Luan via a fight cloud. Leni sees and tries to stop them, "Guys, stop! You're gonna wake up Rory."
"Rory's not a dog!" Lori berates, and then swipes the plush toy from Leni. But Leni gets a hard grip.
"Hey, give me back Rory!" Leni cries as she gets dragged to the fight cloud. And Patrick never wakes up from the carnage in the room.
Meanwhile, oblivious to the quarrel from her sisters, Lynn sturdily throws a ball to an air vent, knocking down the lid to the ventilation system. She gets her ball but, out of awe and curiosity, enters the vent. Back to the group, Luna tries to stop but she spots Lynn entering the vents.
"Guys, Lynn is getting eaten!" Luna utters in panic, making the sisters stop quarreling. They quickly approach Lynn but they discover she is safe from entering the vents. The 2-year-old Lynn then points beyond the vent pipes, giving the impression that she wants the group to proceed there."Lynn, don't enter there," Lori insists.
"I think she wants us to crawl in there to go to the light there," Luna deduces.
"Oh no, not the dark," Leni reacts.
"But I think Lynn has a bright idea. Hehehe. Get it?" Luan jokes. And suddenly, Lynn utters in baby gibberish, "Brother, brother…"
"Wait did she say her first word?" Lori says, "Brother?"
"Brother, brother…" Lynn repeats in mumbles.
"She did. She said 'brother, brother'," Luan claims, "And she wants to go see our new baby brother.""Okay let's go!" Luna suggests with enthusiasm.
With Lynn's insistence, Lynn, Luan, Luna and Leni crawl through the air vents. But Lori is hesitant.
"Aren't you coming, Lori?" Luna asks.
"I supposed to be watching you guys," Lori claims."Well, you can watch us while we are searching for our baby brother," Luna defends her claim.
Lori looks back at the room to see Patrick still sleeping and the TV still on. With no other choice, Lori follows.
And there sets off an adventure we would never forget…
After Lori narrates, Lincoln asks, "Wait, what kind of adventure?"
"You won't wanna know," Lori reacts.
"Oh, we do, troublemakers," Lucy states.
"Fine…" Lori says, and then continues the story.
Hope you enjoyed the story! As usual, I am open to questions and suggestions for the story. As for requests, I will work on them, one by one, as I will try to keep on posting more followups on the stories I am doing.