I am so sorry that it has taken me so long to post this chapter. To the anon reviewer who asked (and anyone else): this story is not abandoned! My updating may be a little unpredictable this summer, but I assure you that I will keep posting! And with that, I want to thank you all for your patience and support. And I hope you enjoy the chapter.

I do not own Criminal Minds

When JJ got home she heard voices from the kitchen.

"I honestly thought it was the same."

"I told you it wouldn't match!"

"It must be the lighting or something."

"Derek, face it. JJ is definitely going to notice this."

"I'm definitely going to notice what?" JJ asked. She walked into the kitchen and stood behind Emily and Derek who were facing the wall, "and why are you standing?"

"Nothing. And I'm not, this is just an illusion" Emily turned around and gave her a tight smile. JJ looked past her and saw a spot on the wall that Derek was still painting. The paint was about two shades lighter than the rest of the wall.

"What exactly happened here?" JJ asked, her hands on her hips.

Emily bit her lip, "Derek punched the wall."

"What!" Derek flung the paintbrush, spattering the yellow-tan paint onto Emily's shoulder, "I did not punch the wall."

JJ raised her brow at Emily.

"Uh," Emily squirmed, "rats?"

"That's the best you could come up with?" Derek turned back to finish painting the wall.

"The uh," Emily said, "well I tripped, and the mug kind of just flew out of my hand."

"Are you okay?" JJ asked quickly.

"I'm fine," Emily assured her, "but there was also a mug casualty."

"So you broke a mug too?"

"Well, uh..."

JJ smiled and laughed, "I'm not mad, Em."

"You had me fooled," Derek said, "I was just about to head for cover."

JJ reached out and took Emily's hand, "all I care is that you're okay. I don't care about a hole in the wall."

"Dent," Emily corrected.

"Okay, I don't care about a dent in the wall."

"But for future reference, she also doesn't care about holes in the wall," Derek offered.

JJ gave him a look and he closed the paint container. "I think that's my cue," he said, "the paint should be dry soon, and if you absolutely hate it, I can come back with a better color tomorrow."

"I think we can take it from here. But thank you," JJ added.

"Anytime," he gave her a knowing look and nodded. "See you later," Derek said and grabbed his jacket before leaving.

"I'm gone for eight hours and you have to patch a hole in the wall?"

"Dent," Emily corrected.

JJ shook her head, "dent," she repeated. "And how are you?"

"Would you believe me if I said I was fine?"

"Not for a second," JJ said, "come on." She led Emily to the couch and they sat down, "what's going on?"

Emily looked at JJ. She thought of the conversation she had had with Derek. She thought about Interpol and the BAU. She thought of how much she loved this intelligent, thoughtful, and strong woman who was sitting next to her. Then she thought of the conversation she had had with Easter and immediately that feeling came back, the pit in her stomach. She thought of JJ, Derek, the team. Her family.

She swallowed, "There are..." she shook her head, "there are some things that I just can't tell you. It's not because I don't want to, and it's not because I don't trust you, please believe that. But with Interpol, I just, I can't always tell you what's going on."

"Then can you tell me how I can help?" JJ asked.

"You... just being you is all I need."

"Okay," JJ said, she took Emily's hand and smiled, "I can be me. I understand if you can't always tell me everything, Em. It's never been about me needing to know the details of your investigations. I want to help you and oftentimes talking about what's hurting helps. But if that's not possible, we'll find another way, okay?"

"I wish," Emily sighed, "I just wish things were different. You shouldn't have to deal with this."

"I wish you weren't hurting," JJ said, "but I have never wished that I weren't involved with you. And I have never regretted it. You have shown me more love than I ever thought possible. And you have helped me be myself and not care what others might think. You have shown me that love is love, Emily Prentiss, and I love you."

XXX

JJ woke up to a scream. She opened her eyes and she sat up. She turned on the lamp and looked over to see Emily struggling beneath the blankets, her face contorted in pain.

"Get out... no, JJ... get out... Doyle..." Emily muttered.

"Emily, wake up," JJ shook her shoulder gently, "it's just a dream. You're safe."

Emily's eyes shot open and she stared at JJ, her eyes filled with terror and pain. Then she tore the blankets away and bolted to the bathroom slamming the door shut behind her. JJ got up and followed, she could hear the sound of Emily vomiting through the door.

"I'm coming in," she called before turning the doorknob and walking into the bathroom. Emily retched into the toilet coughing. JJ gently pulled Emily's hair away from her face, "it's okay," she whispered, "it's okay."

Emily gagged and coughed and then slumped back. JJ sat down behind her and pulled Emily into her body. "It's okay," she continued to whisper, feeling Emily's clammy skin against her own. She wrapped her arms around the other woman and felt her body shiver. "I know it's scary, but you are not alone Emily. You are not alone."

Emily let her body relax against JJ's. She listened to her words and let herself believe them, if only for the moment. For just a second she felt safe. The images of Doyle and JJ and the bomb faded away as she felt JJ's arms around her. She closed her eyes.

XXX

When Emily opened her eyes she was still in the bathroom. She was tucked against JJ's body on the cold floor. "How long have I been asleep?"

"About two hours," JJ replied.

"We're both going to be sore," Emily said.

"You're probably right about that," JJ said, but she wasn't upset, "how are you doing?"

"I think it's safe to say I've been better."

"You had a nightmare?"

"I don't really want to talk about it right now," Emily said quickly, "but, thanks. Thank you for... you know."

"Of course. Do you need anything?"

Emily sat up and stretched out her arms. "I think I'm going to take a shower."

JJ stood and helped Emily up, "call if you need anything."

Emily nodded and when JJ left the bathroom she stood in front of the mirror and stared at herself. Her eyes were red and her hair was a mess. She sighed and turned on the shower, stripping off her clothes as the water warmed. She stepped inside and let the water run over her body.

And the longer she stood there the angrier she got.

Angry at the man who had killed her team. Who was putting the people she loved in danger.

And angry that there wasn't a damn thing she could do about it.