/Age:…/ - age of the main character.

See the end of the chapter for translations.

Warnings: Mention of death, language and emotions.

Disclaimer: I don't own it. It's not true! It's bullshit! I don't own it. I do nooooot… Oh, hi guys.

Childhood Arc: Learning to Fly

Maybe happiness is this: not feeling like you should be elsewhere, doing something else, being someone else. - Isaac Asimov

/Age: one year/

It had been a week since my birthday. Hiori-ba-chan had been devastated enough to close the shop for the time being. A few women visited us in order to offer their condolences, but that's it. No friends came to her, nor any family members, not like we have any. She told me that my grandparents died during the Second Shinobi War, leaving her and Tou-san orphaned.

I still hadn't asked about Kaa-san. To tell the truth, I was kind of afraid to ask. I desperately wanted to believe that she'd simply abandoned me, that way I wouldn't have to mourn that person. But now that I think about it, I never even knew her, so why bother?

Today was the first time we left the house since receiving the horrid news. Ba-chan was carrying me in her gloved hands while I was clinging onto her neck. We were heading towards the Third Training Ground, both of us clad in black. After all, today was the day Tou-san's name was being engraved onto the Memorial Stone.

We passed a few other training grounds on our way there. The skies were gloomy, just like our mood. Ever so slowly it started to rain. Seemed like even the skies were weeping, but we weren't. We'd shed all the tears by now.

In the anime we've only seen Kakashi and a few others visit the Memorial Stone. In real life, though, the place is crowded. The amount of mourning is unbelievable. So many lives lost for the desire of those pathetic lords, for their covetous natures. But, in the end, all that's left are loved ones lost, lands covered in crimson, children orphaned and people seething with hatred, the never-ending cycle taking its toll.

Wars only bring pain.

It took us a while to get through the crowd and to the monument itself. It looked just like I remembered it from the anime: a smooth black marble structure shaped as a kunai. Ba-chan brought me closer to the stone and started to go through the names – oh, so many names, too many – and it took about three minutes for her to come to a stop. At that moment her whole body went stiff while her eyes widened and lips slightly parted in shock. Some may say that she should have been ready by the time, but I can understand her. Knowing is one thing, but accepting is completely another.

Her eyes somewhat watered before she shut them. My chubby hands tightened around the fabric on her neck, my whole body felt numb while my throat felt drier than the desert of Suna. Ba-chan's hand traced a lone kanji – not kanji but Tou-san's name – and she parted her lips bit as if to say something, but no words came out. Her gaze was unfocused, lips pushed back together. A few more minutes passed before she spoke, her hand never leaving the name.

"Amachi Kiyoshi." Her voice no louder than a whisper. My eyes traveled from her face to my Tou-san's name and back. It took a few moments for her to speak again. "He was my otōto, two years younger than me. Always so bright, so full of life. He dreamt big, always chasing after the impossible. Such a pure heart…" Her voice faltered, but she took a deep breath and continued, an almost invisible smile forming. "He wanted to become a shinobi since he could talk, worked his way up through thick and thin. I kept my eyes on him, always making sure that he was dressed and fed. Kaa-san and Tou-san were both too busy with their carrier and the looming war. Otōto would always say that they were heroes, giving up their lives for our village. He'd do his best to become a Chūnin, then a Tokubetsu Jōnin. Always rushing right into the middle of the fight…

"Your Kaa-san was different. She was always so calm, gentle, calculating. They evened each other perfectly. I guess that's why you turned out to be so prodigious." No… please don't tell me about her… "Ayaka always wished to be a mother, but her poor health wouldn't let her. She was so lively, but after a series of unfortunate events her life turned into hell. As she turned twenty-four, the doctors deemed her healthy enough for pregnancy. My otōto was ecstatic. After so many years of non-stop torture, those negative prognostications, they were given a chance. During the pregnancy they were gleeful all the time. If it weren't for the relapse of her disease…" She signed, tears flowing slowly down her angelic face. She took a few moments to catch her breath, and I wouldn't dare interrupt her. What she just said, even though it hit me hard, wasn't too much to handle. If I were a real kid I might have broken down, but I'm not. I stayed quieter than ever, going as far as to try to breathe without a sound. When she continued, her voice was no longer a bitter one, it was more sorrowful with the slightest note of acceptance. "They'd have been so proud of you, Isamu-chan."

Sometimes people live, sometimes they die. I know that. I also know that I shouldn't worry so much about a woman I never knew. But why…

Why does it hurt so much?

/Age: 1 year 2 months/

The weather in Konoha was getting chilly. At least it confirmed that I was born during summer or autumn, but I didn't know for sure. I wished I could read so bad…

Today Oba-chan and I were going shopping. She dressed me in the cutest yukata shirt; it's dark blue and has this absolutely gorgeous silver petal print. My pants were plain black, but the quality was astonishing. She was a bit stressed about the fact that I chose female clothes over those for males, but I don't care. I'm a cute kid and I'll wear that stuff, hehe.

Oba-chan was putting on some makeup when I realized that it's my chance. We only have one mirror, and it's placed way up the wall for me. Believe it or not, but I kept forgetting to ask Ba-chan to lift me up every single time. I still have no clue about my looks, only that my skin is pale enough to pass for an anemic person. But today…

"Ba-chan, up! Mirror!" She looked down at me with her beautiful smile, only to be met with my pout and puppy eyes.

She squealed. Ouch. So maybe I overdid it a bit…

"Oi, of course! How could I've been so blind? You haven't seen yourself in the mirror yet!" She squats to pick me up and- fucking hell.

In the mirror I can see a toddler with pale skin, short black hair, small nose and big eyes. But the eyes aren't simply big. No…

Heterochromia, if memory serves me right. Left is an icy blue, just like Tou-san's, while the right one is a crimson red. Both are extremely bright, the irises are huge when the pupils are very small. The lashes are long, thick and completely black.

Wow, I can see reason in why she squeals every single time I pout. I am so fucking adorable!

I turned my head to look at Oba-chan, a mischievous glint in my eyes. I could totally use puppy eye look for anything!

Oba-chan sweat-droped…

/Age: 1 year 3 months/

Today we went to visit the Memorial stone again. We went there every week, on Saturdays, early in the mornings. At that time there were almost no people there, only us and the harmonious nature.

The war ended a few days ago, I've already started hearing rumors about appointment of a new Hokage in Ba-chan's teashop. People were cheering, the streets were crowded, festival preparations were in place. Even after the war, with almost no money left in the village, people were still smiling and no one was giving up.

I was the only one afraid of what's to come. Even after almost a year of planning I didn't have a single clue about what to do with the Kyūbi Attack. Was there even a way to stop it? I was one-year-old. How could I stop something like that?

Fuck, how can I help? I wasn't born just for nothing, right? Was there a way to help them at all? Could I prevent something like the death of thousands? I…

I guess I can't. I was one-year-old child, no sane person would take my word seriously. I had no shinobi relatives alive. I had no way to contact Minato. Even if I do find a way, they might put me through a Yamanaka and fry my brain in process. Or worse, the council might find out. What someone like Danzō would do with the intelligence about the future… It's best to not risk him finding out. And there is Tobito, and Orochimaru. Wouldn't want to find myself tortured and experimented on.

That's why I decided to lie low for the time being. I needed to plan everything out. I couldn't risk the lives of tenth of thousands for my personal interest. I needed to prevent a war and stopping the Kyūbi Attack might only bring it closer or even kill more afterwards. In order to save those lives, sacrifices needed to be made. I just needed to prepare.

I hope I'll live. If I don't, then Naruto will be born to protect those in need.

As soon as we arrived at the Memorial Stone I've realized that we were not alone. In fact, that very Hokage candidate and his team were there. Well, most of his team.

Obito was missing.

They were broken. Minato was staring at the stone with the pained look while Rin was crying, but Kakashi looked the worst. His knees were shaking slightly, his hands were fisted, his eye – the only uncovered eye – was closed and his head was bowed.

As we arrived right at the stone I was placed on the ground. I spared them a glance and trained my eyes on Tou-san's name. Oba-chan bowed to them, with only Minato answering her. We stayed like that for a while, maybe an hour or so. Afterwards, Oba-chan and I left, bowing to them. Once again only Minato answered.

That night I had my first nightmare. It was far from the last.

/Age: 1 year 5 months/

A few months passed since we stumbled upon Team Minato. It was said that the Yondaime was elected, but not appointed for the job yet. My nightmares only got worse. I was an insomniac in my previous life, so this is nothing new. I just wish that I wouldn't dream of people dying so fucking often.

But today is different. I woke up from dreamless sleep, got dressed and ready for the day. Oba-chan had a day so she decided to gift me a present. Calligraphy lessons! Finally, I could get on my way to become a Fūinjutsu master! Or at least learn how to read, hehe.

We sat at a low table. She took out a few scrolls and pencils, placing them next to me. "Today I'll show you how to write your name. First of all you need to learn how to hold a-" She shut her jaw with a click after seeing me take a pencil the right way. It's not like I could forget that, even with my chubby hands. Of course I couldn't write the way I used to – I hadn't held a pencil in this life before – but I could learn again.

"I see you hold pencil. I do same." I try to explain my way of thinking because she looks like I broke her... oops?

"Oh, sure. How could I've thought less of you? Anyway, let me show you." She starts writing… something. Is this shit really my name? Who chose that kanji?

"Now you try it!'' She said cheerfully. Yeah, like that was possible for me. I tried… and failed. Miserably. I felt so embarrassed because it's just a simple kanji! Why couldn't I do it?

"Oh, don't you worry. You'll get it! You can't be the best at everything. Calligraphy is an art that takes time and patience. I'm sure you'll get it," Ba-chan tries to reassure me. I used to be fine in it! Oh, come on! I wish I didn't forget hiragana and katakana. Damned memory of mine is worse than that of a goldfish!

I felt myself pout. What, I'm a brat so I'm permitted to do it!

That's when I heard a soft laugh reach my ears. What's so funny?

"You're so cute! Don't you worry, most kids your age can't do what you can." Ba-chan flicks me on my nose before continuing. Ouch, woman!

"I believe in you."

… My eyes widen while heat rises to my cheeks. Four simple words to many, but not me. In my previous life people never believed in me. They expected me to know stuff I didn't like, but never did they believe in my power. I was always a shy, introverted girl. My opinions didn't matter. My efforts didn't matter. But she… believes in me.

"Arigatō, ba-chan."

/Age: 1 year 7 months/

The previous month was big: festivals, growing economy, the appointment of Yondaime Hokage. Yep, Minato took the hat.

My nightmares were still coming. At this rate I felt like I was going to look like Gaara 2.0. But that's okay, nothing too big. Not like I wake up screaming, and I can actually sleep. Ba-chan took me to a sensei after dark bags started forming under my eyes.

Seems like many orphaned babies have the same problem after the war.

So today I'm home alone. Ba-chan left to do her stuff, not my business. The time has come. I spent the last year meditating to enlarge my chakra reserves. It helped quite a bit. It is time to do the impossible! The day has come for the hero to rise!

The leaf exercise!

…

3 hours later.

The fucking leaf won't stick! What the hell! I tried placing it on my palm, forehead, arm, elbow. I could feel my chakra collecting, but controlling it is impossible! It seemed so easy in the anime and all those fanfics. Why the flying duck couldn't I do it? I was careful, my chakra didn't end yet, my tenketsu felt fine. I wouldn't give up! ARGH!

A/N: Done! Gah, this chapter got me. His aunt didn't take him to his mom's grave right away cuz she was afraid he may be too traumatized (Memorial Stone is located near the training grounds while the grave is in the cemetery, big difference for a kid's mind). His mom's disease is up to your imagination, I didn't see any sense in his aunt describing it to a toddler. The next chapter is gonna be tough. The second year was supposed to be combined in one chapter, buuut… it didn't fit. I needed to split it up. Anyway, hope you like it!

Oba-chan/ba-chan – aunt, auntie.

Otōto – little brother

Kaa-san - mother

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