CHAPTER 12 – Emma – Charmed

"I think I'm gonna throw up," I mumbled, leaning back in my chair with a satisfied sigh and massaging my stomach.

Regina made lunch, and jeez, if it wasn't the best ravioli I had ever eaten! I mean, of course I knew Regina could cook, but it had been such a long time since I last relished one of her dishes that I had completely forgotten just how delicious her cooking was. I had three portions of those ravioli and I felt like I was going to explode at any moment.

"Then get the hell out of my kitchen," she replied stern, but I could tell she was just teasing.

"And leave you alone to clean up all that stuff?" I said, referring to the amount of dirty bowls, dishes and utensils piled up inside the sink. "No way."

"Then get up and help me. I'll wash, you'll dry."

"Just give me a minute to recover…" I replied, short of breath. "You do realize you've just made me the happiest woman in the world, don't you?"

"Well, I try," she smirked, and I swear I saw the hint of a blush creep onto her cheeks, betraying her confident façade.

I beamed at her reaction, and with a heavy, tired huff I stood up and made my way to the sink, grabbing the cloth right beside it. I could barely keep my eyes open: all that food was making me sleepy.

As I dried the dishes she handed me, I fantasized about getting some sleep when we'd be done – however, of course, that was but a utopia. By the time we had finished tidying the counter up, in fact, it was almost four, hence we had to go pick Henry up from school.

"Come on, you can't be that tired!" she teased me, giving me a playful nudge. "You're such a drama queen."

I looked at her, disbelief plastered on my face, my mouth dropping instantly. "Says you!" I let out a chortle. This woman!

We hopped on the bug, and less than half an hour later I was, once again, pulling up in Miffling Street.

"… And then we heard a high-pitched, ear-splitting whistle coming from the speakers and grandma's voice echoed through the corridors and inside of all of the classrooms, and she started rambling about some ball she wants to throw next week. She was panting by the time she had stopped talking, but I don't think I've ever heard her so excited, before – and that's saying something!"

Henry was telling us about the unexpected announcement that had the whole school in turmoil, quivering with anticipation himself. He was so cute, getting this excited for a dance… I found myself wishing for him to never grow up; to stay this carefree, innocent and happy forever.

"And of course it's not just a school dance: the whole town's invited, and the ball will be at Town Hall," he continued, shaking me out of my thoughts.

My eyes flared in surprise as I processed the information.

"Oh, no," I muttered, shocked and slightly terrified. "My parents are gonna force me to go, just like last time. Oh, no, no, no."

"It can't be that bad?" Regina said, watching back and forth between me and Henry, slightly worried herself.

"It isn't," Henry reassured her, as we entered the mansion, "ma's just the biggest drama queen."

"What?! I'm so not a drama queen!" I exclaimed, offended. What was with these two?!

I followed Henry as he entered the kitchen, not willing to let go of his insinuation until I proved my point.

Regina chuckled, smug for being agreed with, and she leaned against the island with a teasing smile on her face.

"Anyway," Henry changed the subject almost immediately, "I'm going with Violet, of course. We're planning on getting matching outfits, you know, with my tie the same color as her dress and stuff."

He grabbed a box of juice from the fridge and brought it closer to his mouth; he was about to take a sip, when Regina stopped him.

"Don't drink straight from the carton," she scolded him lightly, her 'mom voice' that brooked no objections.

"This is so unfair!" he exclaimed, incredulous. "You don't remember who I am, but I still can't get away with stuff like this. Ugh."

Of course he was only joking; his voice was light and the ghost of a grin played on his lips. Regardless, I felt Regina stiffen beside me, and I knew his words touched her more than he meant them to.

"I'm gonna go do my homework," he added then with a sigh, and after he poured himself a glass of juice he disappeared upstairs.

I was secretly glad he had left: now I could try and cheer up Regina, or at least wipe away the guilt I knew she was feeling.

"Don't," I ordered, bluntly.

She gave me a baffled look, pretending not to know what I was talking about.

"Don't work yourself up about it," I elaborated. "You know he didn't mean it like that."

She simply nodded, and I didn't drag the topic any further: I didn't want to force her into talking about something, when she clearly didn't want to.

"I just want to get all of this over with," she confessed, fiddling with her fingers as she looked down, suddenly disheartened. "I want to remember who I am; I want to stop hurting people."

"Regina…"

"You didn't think I noticed, did you?" she interrupted me, gazing up for a second, a bitter laugh escaping her lips. "All the nostalgic looks you give me when you think I'm not watching; the sadness that hovers behind your eyes when I remind you of the old me; the fake smiles you give me when you pretend to be fine. Maybe I don't have some inner lie-detector, dear, but I can tell you're not happy. And I'm tired of being the cause of that."

I couldn't believe her words. I didn't think she would be so observant, nor that my feelings would sadden her this much. A strong stab of guilt pierced my skin, making me feel horrible – to put it simply.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, not knowing what to say. "I should've been more careful, you weren't supposed to have this weight on you…"

"It's okay," she shrugged it off. "At least now I'm slightly more motivated to find a cure. How about we start from that book Zelena gave us?"

I shook my head, not wanting to let go of the topic just yet. She deserved an explanation.

"I want you to know that the fact that you don't remember who you are isn't exactly the problem," I said slowly, hoping that she would understand what I meant and not take it the wrong way. "You're still the same as before: you might not remember your past and all the pain that shaped you as a person, but you still act consequently: you're sarcastic, obnoxious, caring and extremely insecure, just like you've always been. At first I was worried this might not have been the case, but now I know it is.

"No, what makes me so upset is that you don't remember me." I looked away: I wasn't used to being this open about my feelings, this vulnerable… but if it meant helping Regina, then I would do it a million times, without a doubt. "You have no idea of all the things we've gone through – and I'm not talking about killing flying monkeys or teaming up to defeat some bad guy. I'm talking about our relationship, and how it has evolved throughout the years. You like me, now, but you don't know how you've ended up being my friend. You don't remember who I used to be; you don't remember why I'm me, and I can barely stand the thought."

A pair of arms wrapped around my waist, and I sank into that hug, quickly returning it: each of us was comforting the other, sharing our strength and hoping it would be enough. The familiar tingle of our combined magic seemed to help.

I broke away from the embrace first, precariously on the verge of tears. I looked into her brown eyes, also particularly watery, and I did the only thing that could make us feel better: I kissed her, just slightly. A gentle peck that gave her the choice to return it or pull away. But she kissed me back, deepening the exchange, and before either of us could realize it wasn't a good idea, my bare back was laying on the cold surface of the island, most of our clothes forgotten on the kitchen floor, and I was completely lost.

My head was in the clouds during the whole trip to my parent's loft. I was so distracted that I even ran a red light a few times; thankfully, I wasn't planning on arresting myself any time soon.

Once again, I was obsessing over having had sex with Regina. I managed to only focus on what had just happened, though, keeping my thoughts away from whatever it might mean that it was the second time in two days that we did so, and that my heart was just about to burst out of my chest from both panic and full-on joy.

It had been utterly different than the first time: it wasn't fueled by anger nor resentment. It was despair, melancholy and need that filled the air; it was docile, sweet, and yet, it had been just as passionate and urgent as the previous day. To be honest, it was much more hushed, too – having Neal asleep in the next room and Henry doing his homework upstairs led to hands covering our mouths and stifled moans… Which probably made it even more exciting… But still! This wasn't going to happen again. Seriously.

The fact that Henry had spent the past ten minutes rambling non-stop about how there was a thick layer of fog surrounding exclusively the mansion, and how he hadn't been able to concentrate on his math problems because it was raining, but the slice of sky he saw from outside the window was blue, devoid of any cloud, surely didn't help.

Regina was just as lost in her thoughts as I was. She seemed to wake up from her daydream only when she heard the car door slam shut as Henry got off the bug.

"How are you feeling?" I asked, worried.

She shrugged. "Confused," she confessed, "but oddly better than earlier. Although I really don't want to think about the reason behind that."

Same, Regina.

Knowing that she was feeling better relaxed me. We followed Henry inside the building without a word, gliding up the stairs and not bothering to knock on the door: it still was my place too, after all.

"Hi guys!" my mom greeted us beaming, quickly hugging us as we took our coats off. "How are you doing?"

I didn't reply to that, Henry's description of the curious weather enough to satisfy my mom's interest. Dad hugged us as well, listening intently to what Henry was saying. I noticed Regina was feeling uncomfortable, probably because, after all, my parents were but an acquaintance, to her.

I caught her attention, meaning to distract her from those thoughts. "So, is this how you were imagining it?" I asked with a smirk, referring to the décor of the apartment: Zelena had poofed all of the furniture back to its place as soon as Regina had left the flat.

"Yes, it is," she replied, a bit freaked out. "This is exactly what I was picturing in my mind when I saw your mother's file. It's… destabilizing."

"Eh, don't think about it; soon enough you'll get used to it," I shrugged the matter off. "Come on, I'll show you to my 'room'."

I ushered her upstairs, where my bedroom was; although now it didn't look as much like the place I usually slept in, as a post-apocalyptic battlefield.

The sheets on my bed had been torn apart and were spilled out onto the floor; the mattress had been straight-up opened in half, its stuffing scattered everywhere; my clothes had been pulled out of the dresser, and every book that was once in my bookshelf had been ripped out, laying now on the hardwood floor.

"What the…" I let out, flabbergasted. "Mom, dad, what happened here?"

"Oh, so this isn't how you usually keep your room?" Regina sassed.

"What are you talking about?" my father shouted from downstairs.

"Someone's been going through my stuff," I explained. Dad hurried in the room, his concern mirroring my own.

"Woah. I had no idea any of this happened, I've come back from the station only an hour ago and I've been helping your mother to make dinner ever since…"

"What's going on…?" Mom had joined us as well, Henry following suit.

A powerful urge to protect my son took over me: whoever had vandalized my room could have easily found Harry, too. He had been sleeping there for the past few days. I automatically reached out a hand and he accepted my hug, stroking my back in a soothing motion.

Since when is he the one comforting me, and not the other way around?

"Oh my god," my mom let out, her hands shooting up to cover her mouth, probably even more shocked than anyone else.

"It must have happened this morning: I slept here last night, and of course everything was fine then," Henry reasoned. "What do you think they were looking for?"

"I think I might have an idea…" I looked at Regina, and I knew we were on the same page: the jewelry box. Good thing I always kept it where I knew it would be safe: at the mansion it was always where I could keep an eye on it, and when we happened to go out, Regina kept it in her handbag – which is exactly where it was at that moment.

"Luckily, they didn't find what they were looking for," I sighed, and made my way back downstairs, "so can we please have dinner? I'm starving."

The evening went on as if nothing had happened; mom seemed pretty upset at first, probably shocked that someone had broken into her home, but eventually she relaxed, and we all enjoyed that small slice of normality – something that was extremely rare in our family. We even agreed to have Henry sleep at the mansion.

I excused myself after a while, leaving my parents and Henry to their debate on the credibility of Law and Order, and led Regina outside the apartment and to the fire escape that led to the roof.

"I'm assuming this is your secret place?" she guessed, as we finally arrived.

I nodded as I headed to the beach chairs in the middle of the surface and grabbed a few blankets from a cabinet along the way.

"And I'm also assuming we're about to stargaze?"

I replied very maturely by sticking my tongue out at her tease. I went to lay down on one of the chairs and started to admire the night sky, hearing Regina's footsteps right behind me.

"Ever since I was little, my life has been all over the place," I told her, my eyes studying the stars above me. "I didn't have a home, I didn't have parents. I spent most of my childhood being tossed from a foster family to another, without even having enough time to get attached to someone before I would have to leave them.

"When I turned sixteen I ran away from the foster system, I became a thief and a year later I met Neal. We fell in love, but with the lifestyle we had chosen to pursue, we couldn't remain in the same place for too long, so we just stayed in motels and bed-and-breakfasts, and moved town every year.

"Then I came here, and I found my family and a place where I could finally settle down; but then, every other day some monster would try to kill us, or some bad guy would have us travel to another realm, and I never got the chance to actually enjoy it.

"Throughout all this time, regardless of what house, city or even world I was in, the sky has always been the same. It has always been the one thing, in my life, that was there to comfort me, to tell me that I was exactly where I was supposed to be. I would look up at the stars and I would find their familiar patterns stare back at me, letting me know that I was going to be fine. I found in the sky a certainty that I was never able to find on Earth: a home." I turned my head to the side, so that I could look at her. She kept staring at the pitch black veil right above us, her brown eyes catching the starlight. She was beautiful.

"You can't really see the stars, in New York," she murmured after a while. "This is breathtaking."

It felt like I couldn't divert my gaze, too charmed by her to even want to stop admiring her beauty. Not that I had never realized it before – it would take straight-up blindness not to realize how lovely she was – but, somehow, tonight was different. Maybe it was the atmosphere, or maybe her enraptured look, or maybe something else entirely.

"Yeah," I whispered back. "Breathtaking."

A/N: Uuuuh cheesy Emma's crushing on Regina! Thank you for your wonderful comments, they've been keeping me from going insane over uni exams. I hope you have a wonderful week and I shall see you again on Saturday! X