Knapford
Enter Thomas, Annie, and Clarabel on left.
Thomas
As dawn breaks and a new day begins,
I begin my duties on mine fair branch line.
Steam falls from my funnel as mine wheels spin,
I'll finish my run to Knapford on time.
Good morrow dear squirr'ls, good morrow dear birds.
Good morrow dear trees and rabbits and sky.
This day's fair cannot beest expressed in words,
But heaven above knows I will damn try.
I'll sing a pretty song to mine coaches,
My song helps them run swimmingly.
I'll have to hurry; Knapford approaches,
I'll sing my song for them specifically.
I-
Enter James from left.
James
Somebody hath to be the favorite!
The one that ev'rybody wants to see!
Thomas
James!
James
Somebody must be better than the rest!
Somebody must be so good that they're the best!
Enter Passengers from right.
James
Somebody hath to beest the favorite,
Somebody hath to beest me! Here is James!
Thomas
You're not the favorite, James!
James
Of course I am, little Thomas. Ask anybody.
Thomas
No you're not! And I was going to sing a song just now!
James
Well I shan't intrude. Quiet, everybody! Thomas would like to sing an ode!
Thomas
I can't sing it now. My inspiration has gone!
Little Girl smiles hopefully
Thomas
Maybe if it brightens up the hearts of the children.
I sing a song to-
James
Sometimes thou hast to blow thy whistle!
To let the other engines know thou's't near!
Sometimes thou must make a big fuss and shout!
To ensure that they are not left in doubt!
Somebody has to beest the favorite!
Say good greetings! The favorite is here!
Thomas
You're not Sir Topham Hatt's favorite engine, James!
James
Then explain how 'tis that I get all the best jobs. Thy next job is to collect pigs from the farms, is it not?
Thomas
'Tis my branch line, and 'tis only a noble duty to serve the farmers.
James
Care to know what my next job is? Transporting beautiful music.
Thomas
Thou liest! One cannot carry music! 'Tis only a sound!
James
Look over to the platform, and you'll see I tell the truth;
A band of musicians awaits their train to Ballahoo.
Exit James on right.
Thomas
That arrogant James, his jobs are just luck,
I hope that his next job is to pull trucks.
Exit Thomas, Annie, and Clarabel. Enter Sir Topham Hatt on telephone from right.
Sir Topham Hatt
This crash wast terr'ble is all I can say.
Edward is taking Henry to the works.
James wilt do Henry's jobs after today.
He'll take a train to where diesel still lurks.
Enter Thomas from left.
Thomas
What's that I hear? A freight train for James?
God hath heard my prayer, James doesn't like to pull trucks!
Enter James from right.
Thomas
I just ov'rheard the controller speaking to a friend.
Henry's had a crash, you'll have to take his train.
Thy clean streak of coaches has come to an end!
Thou must pull the trucks to England, then come back here again!
James
Oh woe is me! A flithy, dirty, nasty, goods train?
But I'm just pretending Thomas, I know of Henry's trip.
This goods train is a most important goods train.
The controller's picked me, so you should get a grip.
I'd not pass this up, I'm versatile, you see.
What an epic adventure this will be!
Somebody hath to be the favourite!
That's just the way it is, thou must agree!
Some get to see the world and travel far away!
While other engines have a place they always have to stay!
Somebody hath to beest the favourite!
Somebody hath to beest me!
Exit James on right.
Thomas
Sir Topham Hatt, I ask to thee a question.
Why does James get jobs, but only the best ones?
Sir Topham Hatt
Every job is equal, Thomas. The mail, the fish,
The express, and your branch line.
Do not be jealous, Thomas, it could be thy downfall.
Now who can take that macaroni to Dryaw?
Exit Sir Topham Hatt on right.
Thomas
The Fat Controller isn't fair. He won't give me compensation.
But I have an idea that isn't above mine station.
I'll steal James' train, and set off on my journey,
But first I have to get those trucks from Rosie…