A/N: im baaaccckkk... again! Haha because you guys are great, and because of a request by alwaysromantic4eva, I decided to give you guys 2 chaps in one day :) the least I could do for abandoning the story for a good year and a half! Haha thank you all so much for the reviews and love for Edward and Bella! This story has been such a blast to write! Enjoy... this will be a chapter to remember :)

disclaimer: I do not own twilight!

EPOV:

Embarrassment flowed through my body as I parked in my driveway after dropping Bella off at her house as I realized that I was smiling like an idiot the whole way home.

Two weeks without Bella was absolute torture. I had no desire to do anything. It felt like my life lost meaning altogether. I had no idea how dependent I was on her presence. I thought about her constantly, and how natural being around her was for me. I couldn't get her out of my head. I lay wide awake late into the night, wondering if she was looking at the moon, thinking of me, too. I fought the urge to show up at her doorstep each and every second of each and every day.

I thought that maybe separation was a good thing. I was becoming too attached to her and I really was not trying to go down that road again. I tried coming to terms with the fact that Bella walked out of my life. A relationship was the last thing I needed anyway. I had school to focus on. Another heartbreak just couldn't be added to the list.

But the feeling that envelopes me when I'm with Bella is more than enough to forget about all of that. She's simply intoxicating. Was I in too deep? Probably. Was I being dangerous? Probably. I should keep a stronger wall around my heart. But Bella seemed to have every fucking weapon possible to completely tear the wall down.

But did she feel the same way? She had exited my life right after I kissed her, after all. That has to mean she's not interested, and the painful sensation that tore at my heart while realizing this was impossible to ignore. She didn't want me the way I wanted her. I couldn't live without her, though. So, I'll be in her life as whatever she wants me to be. A friend, a protector, and, hopefully, a lover… one day.

I whipped out my cell phone to call Emmett.

"What's up?" He asked after a few rings.

"Hey, man, you up to do me a favor?"

He groaned jokingly. "What's that?"

"Well, it's more of a favor for Bella. Her truck broke down, so could you look at it after school tomorrow?"

"Yeah, no problem," he chuckled. "Any idea what's wrong with it?"

"She didn't say."

"Alright, I'll bring my tools to school and keep them in my trunk. Hopefully it's something I can fix."

"I have faith in you, man," I teased.

"You better! Your Volvo would surely be in a much different condition right now if it wasn't for me," he scoffed.

I laughed, remembering all those times I brought my beloved Volvo to Emmett and Rosalie each and every time I sensed something wrong with it at all.

"Yeah, yeah, don't get too cocky now. I'll see you tomorrow."

I joined my family for dinner that night, something that was rare in the last two weeks. Mom seemed overjoyed about it, which made me happy. I hated hurting her.

"Edward, how was your day today?" Dad asked, recognizing my mood.

"Good," I grinned and plopped at my seat, loading my plate with heaps of food.

Alice threw me a knowing glace and rolled her eyes teasingly. Of course she fucking knew.

After dinner, I trotted up to my room, eager to see if Bella had sent me a text yet like she had promised. I smiled, instantly sent to cloud nine when I saw her name on my phone, the letters that spelled her name seeming to belong on the screen.

Hey, thanks for the ride.

No problem. I called Emmett, he's going to take a look at your truck tomorrow.

As I was waiting for her reply, I heard a knock on my bedroom door.

"Come in," I bellowed throughout the room.

Alice danced her way into the room, throwing herself onto the foot of my bed with a giant smile on her face, her blue eyes dancing wildly in excitement.

"What?" I raised my eyebrows.

"You seem happier than usual today," she mused.

I raked my fingers through my uneasy hair, a nervous habit I somehow, stupidly picked up. "What's your point?"

"I think I know why."

"Oh, do you?" I scoffed. I don't know who I was kidding, though, Alice could read me better than anyone else. Twin telepathy again.

"I think you talked to Bella again," my sister poked her little head into my business.

"What makes you say that?"

This time, it was Alice who scoffed. I watched her tiny frame shake with laughter.

"Oh, please, Edward. You're acting the way you used to when she would come around: all smiles and bright eyes. I'm not saying it's a bad thing. Actually, I think it's great, especially after Jane-"

"Okay, I get it, Alice," I interrupted forcefully, feeling a hint of anger course through my veins. I ignored it, though.

"I'm just saying that I'm happy for you. And I think Bella's great. I have no clue what's going on between the two of you, but I see the way you look at her. And I see the way she looks at you. It didn't take long for me to put the pieces together. Just, be careful, Edward. I don't know her, or her past, but I sense that something isn't right. She seems fragile."

I nodded, completely allowing Alice to tear my walls down, just like I seem to keep allowing Bella to do. But it was different with Alice. I never doubted my trust in her. She could never break my heart. "I know, Alice. I'm trying, I really am. But she keeps distancing herself and she's not really telling me why. I don't know what to do anymore," I looked down at my hands in my lap, wishing they were touching the porcelain skin of a certain brown-eyed girl.

"Just give her time, Ed. If she cares about you enough, she'll come around. If she doesn't, then you'll know it's not meant to be, and you move on. But don't give up on her just yet, I have a great feeling about her," she was smiling towards the end of her statement. I smiled warmly in return.

Alice and I spent the remainder of the night doing homework and watching television in my bedroom. I sent Bella text messages throughout the night, relishing in the small talk, besides the times when I would have to hide my phone from Alice's view when I caught her trying to read over my shoulder. But it always felt great to have my crazy, annoying sister by my side. She seemed to be the one person who could keep me afloat when I felt like sinking.

I awoke easily the next morning, happy because I had planned with Bella to give her a ride to school today.

After annoying the crap out of Alice because I wanted her to hurry the hell up, we were finally en route to Bella's house. The butterflies wreaking havoc in my stomach made me feel like a fucking girl. I wanted to smack myself.

I pulled into her driveway with ease, stepping out of the car and heading to the front door while Alice got out of the front seat and climbed into the back instead.

I raised my fist, ready to knock on the door, but it opened beforehand, revealing a happy, yet nervous looking Bella. She was wearing a pair of jeans that Alice had given her. They shaped the delicate curves of her legs perfectly. I gulped.

"Good morning," I offered her a smile.

"Good morning," she repeated in a small breath. Her body seemed to relax, her shoulders letting go of some tension as she inhaled through her tiny nose.

"Ready to go?"

She nodded and closed the door before heading to my car.

"Hey, Bella!" Alice greeted from the backseat as Bella got in.

"Hi, Alice."

"Oh my God! Are those my jeans?! Those look so cute on you," Alice gushed, her voice increasing by several octaves.

"Thanks, they fit great."

Alice spent the rest of the ride informing Bella all about the designer behind the jeans. I tuned her out, something I was forced to teach myself since the day she learned to talk at a rate of a million miles a minute.

We approached the school and climbed out of the Volvo, instantly met with curious eyes from every direction. People were already shocked when we had all started sitting with Bella at lunch. Now, we have their attention even more.

I felt her stiffen next to me, clearly uncomfortable.

"Just ignore it, Bella, who cares what they have to say?" I breathed in her ear, smelling her delicious scent. She nodded curtly in silent agreement.

I walked Bella to her locker and then to her class, not caring in the slightest if I was late. I missed her presence far too much.

"I'll see you at lunch, then?" I made sure to give her the option to say no.

"Yeah, I'd like that."

I grabbed her hand and kissed it, then waltzed away.

Lunch was good. I felt comfortable again, like I was meant to sit in the plastic chair next to Bella. The gang joined us, talking animatedly about completely random topics. Bella even joined in here and there, her small voice surprising everyone, but nobody was ever anything less than kind. I was extremely thankful for that.

"Alice, make sure Emmett is behind us. I don't want him getting lost." I called to Alice in the backseat of my Volvo. Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper were following us to Bella's after school in order to fix her truck.

"Everyone knows where she lives, don't worry."

"Yeah, but its Emmett," I reminded her, earning a tiny giggle from Bella, who sat huddled in the passenger seat, gazing out the window at the foggy mist.

We pulled up to Bella's in record time, Emmett approaching in his giant vehicle a few moments after.

"Do you guys want anything to drink while you work on the truck?" Bella offered politely.

"A glass of water would actually be great," Emmett smiled.

The girls stayed inside while Jasper, Emmett and I worked on the truck. I have no idea why Rosalie didn't help, since she loves everything about cars, but Alice basically pulled Rosalie and Bella inside, saying that girl time was "necessary." Of course I was not permitted to join.

"Okay, Ed, I'm gonna need that wrench by your feet," Emmett called, his head hunched into the hood of the rusty beast.

"Can you tell what's wrong with it?" I asked as I handed him the tool.

"Yeah. I'm not gonna waste my breath explaining it to you, though. It'll only take me about an hour or so," he teased.

"So, when are you going to ask Bella on an official date?" Jasper quirked his all-knowing eyebrows.

"What makes you think I'm gonna do that?"

"Oh, please! That's like asking if two plus two equals four."

I shook my head, laughing quietly. "I'm not sure how it's going to work with her."

"What do you mean?" Emmett inquired.

I sighed, feeling my shoulders slump in sheer sadness. "She's difficult, dude. She has a wall up and it's fucking hard to get past it. She told me her Dad is insanely strict and does not even let her leave the house, let alone have a boyfriend. I have no clue how it could happen."

"Well, you have to try. I mean, she's eighteen, how can her Dad continue to tell her what to do?" Jasper wondered aloud.

I ran my fingers through my hair, silently reminding myself to get a trim soon. "There's a lot to it that I don't know. I do know, though, that I have to really figure something out."

I stole a glance towards the house, wondering what I would have to do to win Bella over.

"Why don't you just try being brutally honest with her? Just tell her that you have feelings for her and you want to make it work but you have no idea what her intentions are." Jasper advised.

"Every time I try to talk about anything that has to do with being more than friends, she tells me she can't talk about it. I have no idea what she wants."

"Well I know that she wants you, that's obvious," Emmett snorted loudly. My heart leapt at his words, hope growing inside me. I wanted nothing more than Emmett to be correct on this one.

"Dude, you just have to be patient. She'll come around," Jasper assured with a gentle smile on his face.

I could only hope he was right.

I floored my car out of the garage and sped down the windy driveway, watching the autumn trees blur by in one warm-toned vision. I was feeling anxious after my talk with Emmett and Jasper today and I was craving a blunt to calm down my racing mind.

I knew they were right. I needed to figure something out if I really wanted to be with Bella. It would take time, but I had to start somewhere. I just fucking hated spending so much time wondering what it would be like to kiss her or hold her in my arms rather than actually doing those things.

I turned onto the backroad and pulled out the blunt, sparking it and inhaling it almost hungrily. I smoked as if I was a ravenous vampire, and the blunt was a human filled with delicious blood. After a few puffs, I could already feel my eyelids grow heavy. I stared blankly out the windshield, not really looking at anything.

After finishing the blunt, and feeling insanely high, I peeled off the road and headed back towards town, driving aimlessly.

Of course I subconsciously drove towards Bella's house.

I pulled up to her road and sat outside her home, debating on knocking on the door and seeing how she was doing. Phil's police cruiser was absent from the scene. I knew Bella was in there alone.

Without realizing what I was doing, almost on impulse, I exited the car and trotted up the lawn to her front door. I took a deep breath before I knocked softly.

After a few, agonizingly long moments, I heard Bella fumbling with the locks before she threw it open. Her doe-like eyes were wide, her expression beginning in shock but ending in happiness.

"Edward," she breathed, "what are you doing here?"

"I was just driving around and I wanted to see you."

"Are you high?

I felt my heart begin to pound, I did nothing to hide the fact that I was stoned. She's the fucking police chief's daughter. Of course she was probably not okay with weed.

But I wasn't going to lie to her. Ever. "How did you know?"

"I can smell it on you. I would invite you in, but if my Dad smells that in the house at all, it's over for me." I didn't miss the seriousness behind her warning.

"That's okay, do you want to hang out in the backyard then for a little? Are you mad that I'm high? I'm sorry, I just ended up here with no intentions of coming to be honest."

She giggled softly. "No, I don't mind. Come on, let's go in the backyard."

We shuffled side-by-side in the quiet night, the sun almost below the horizon.

"Twilight," she murmured. "Such a beautiful time of day."

"I agree."

We plopped on some lawn furniture in the backyard. The air was chilly, but we both wore enough layers to make it work.

"When is your Dad coming home?"

"He went to the bar about a half hour ago. He usually gets home pretty late."

I lowered my brows, confused. "He drives drunk? As the chief?"

She used air quotes in her explanation. "He doesn't get drunk enough to need a ride."

I dropped the subject. I wasn't here to talk about her father.

"Bella, I'm not sure why I came here, but I think it was because I really need to talk to you."

"Edward-"

"Please," I begged, "let me finish."

She nodded, pursing her pouty lips. I wanted to grab them with my teeth.

"I know everything between us has been confusing lately, but I think it's because we have not really sat down and put our thoughts on the table. So, here I go. I have feelings for you, Bella. And I can sense that it scares you. But I need you to know that I will not push you to do anything and I will stay patient until you're ready. I'm not going to give up."

She shivered, and I doubted the weather had anything to do with it.

"This is just so different to me, Edward. All of it. Friends, boys…"

"So does that mean you're not interested?"

She bit her lip and cast her eyes downward, hiding from me. I hooked my finger under her chin and gently lifted it up, revealing her watery eyes.

"Talk to me," I pleaded in a whisper.

"I have feelings for you, too, of course. I just don't see how we could ever make it work."

I felt a pain that cut me like a fucking knife. Her words were killing me. I'm not sure if I could handle rejection from her.

"Why not?"

"My Dad. I am stuck here. There's nothing I can do."

I grabbed her hands, the warmth and silkiness allowing me to relax.

"You can do whatever you want, Bella. You're 18, there's a whole world out there that you haven't seen. I want to show it all to you."

She smiled sadly and patted my hand.

"Can I tell you a story?" I asked.

She nodded, so I continued. "I've only ever had one serious girlfriend. This girl named Jane. I met her through Alice, she was in her dance classes growing up. We dated for a little over a year, from when I was fifteen until sixteen. She was great- nice, smart, funny, pretty. I thought I was in love with her. I found out she had cheated on me three separate times with three different guys, two of the times she was drunk at a trashy party. It hurt so fucking bad – being betrayed by the one you thought would never do that to you. But, that's not the point. The point is that my feelings for you are so much stronger than the ones I had for her. If she hurt me that bad, I'd have it way worse if you hurt me, too. I don't want you or me to feel that pain, especially if we don't even give it a shot and call it quits now. I know we would feel that pain if we weren't together."

My confession forced tears to swim around in Bella's shiny, perfect eyes. My heart pounded at the intensity of the moment.

"That's what I never wanted. This whole time..." she struggled with her words. "That's why I tried distancing myself. I never wanted to cause you pain. But now I am… whether I'm with you or not."

"How?"

She cried softly, wiping her cheeks of salty tears before choking out her answer. "I can't be with you while I live in this house." She laughed without humor.

"Then I'll be patient, I'll see you when I can and when the time comes, I'll get you out of here. Anywhere you want to go."

"This is just going to be confusing and hard," she sighed.

I kissed her hand. "We will take it slow, get to know each other first and let the chips fall where they may. How does that sound?"

She grinned and nodded, patting away at the last of her tears.

"No more crying, Bella, not when I'm around."

She sighed and forced a smile, squeezing my hand.

"I bet my clothes are aired out by now, do you mind if I use your bathroom?" I asked

"Sure, I'll show you where it is."

We headed inside where I was unsurprised by the home. It lacked…everything. No pictures of Bella as she grew up, no decorations or portraits. No love.

Bella lead me into the tiny bathroom at the top of the stairs.

"I'll be in my room across the hall."

I smiled and shut the door, sitting on the toilet and throwing my head into my hands, begging my racing heart to calm itself. I was a nervous wreck. My intentions were never to barge my way onto her property and declare my intense feelings towards her. But of course I fucking did anyway.

I was just about done taking a leak when I heard the front door slam with an aggressive close and a hoarse, slurred voice scream "Isabella!"

Suddenly, quiet, yet terrified footsteps were outside the door before I heard Bella's frantic voice whisper "Edward, go in my room and climb down the tree by the window and get out of here!" Before she headed downstairs.

I threw the door open, hoping to catch a glimpse of her, but she was already downstairs and out of my sight.

I did my best to move as fast as I could, despite my high state of mind. I just knew I had to leave if I didn't want to make Bella's Dad angry. I was halfway onto the tree when I heard a booming crash and him yelling "you fucking slut! What the fuck is wrong in your retarded brain? Fuck you, dumb bitch! Fuck you!"

My world seemed to be shutting down around me as I came to the disgusting, fucked up, heart-wrenching realization that Bella's Dad is much, much more than strict.

After landing in the backyard and seeing him get back into his cruiser and drive down the alley from behind my hiding spot in a bush, I ran as fast as I could inside.

The sight in front of me caused my hands to ball into tormented fists, my heart to ache so bad I could feel it shattering. I have never experienced a rage so raw, so terrifying, that I saw red… I have never felt the need to kill anyone until that very moment.

A/N: ohhhhhh shit! Lol hope you guys like it! Review pls!