A/N: I know this chapter is a bit smaller, but I didn't want to add anything else with it. Next, something big will happen regarding Hyde.

Waking up, I find myself face to face with Anastasia, my arms wrapped around her small frame while her head rests on my pillow. I notice that her long hair is attacking my face, sticking to my facial hair. I smooth it away the best I can and then brush it away from her face. The movement wakes her and her eyes flutter open. She blinks at me a few times and then rolls to her back to stretch before turning back to me to cuddle close.

"Good morning, babydoll."

"Good morning, husband." She gives me a sleepy smile.

"How do you feel? Are you sore?" Last night, I began to train her backside. I only used two fingers while we made love, but I don't want to hurt her.

She wiggles a little. "Um...no. I'm perfectly fine, sir."

I smile. "Good."

She stretches again, and then stops quickly, frowning.

"What is it, Ana?"

She climbs out of bed and hurries to the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. I'm left, frowning at the back of the door. Did I hurt her?

I give her a minute before I get out of bed, pull on my pajama pants, and knock on the door. "Ana? Are you alright?"

No answer.

Fuck.

I check the knob and see that it's unlocked, so I open it. Peeking in, I see her in her robe next to the toilet, on the floor crying. Oh, fuck. I did hurt her.

"Ana...baby, you need to tell me what's wrong. Do you hurt?" I ask as I sit next to her, pulling her into my lap.

She shakes her head no and sniffles. "I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean to scare you."

My eyebrows knit in confusion. "Tell me why you are crying."

"It's silly."

"You crying is never silly. Tell me."

"I got my period."

"Oh, Ana...angel, I'm sorry." I hug her to me and rock side to side with her.

She shakes her head again. "No, no need to be. I know it's only been a couple weeks. I'm being silly."

"You aren't, sweet girl. I know how badly you want to be a mother. You can't help, but hope. Honestly, I was hoping, too, but the odds of us getting pregnant the first month of trying were slim. We'll get there, baby. We'll try every night if we have to. It's not that bad having to sleep with me, is it?"

She giggles through her tears. "No, of course not."

I tilt her chin up and kiss her lips. "Your lips are so soft when you cry." I kiss her once more and then hold her to me again. "I know it's an awful wait, but we'll get there. In the meantime, is there anything I can do to make it better?"

"Just hold me. I need cuddled, Christian."

I press my lips to her hair. "That's an easy one. I can do that. I'll cuddle you as long as you'd like, then we'll have a nice, hot shower to start the day. I'll wash you from head to toe and wrap you up in a towel and carry you back to bed to cuddle you some more. How does that sound?"

She giggles against my neck and nods. "I like the sound of that."

"Great. Would you mind if I moved us to the bed? I can't feel my ass anymore."

She pulls away from me and stands. "I'm sorry, Christian. I-"

"No, no, Ana. No more sorrys." I pick her up and carry her over to the bed, where I lay her down against the pillows and curl up with her.

"Oh, no. I need a tampon." She begins to sit up, but I pull her back to me.

"Don't worry about it, Ana. We'll change the linens later. Just relax. I want you comfortable."

"But...but what if I bleed on you?"

I shake my head. "I don't give a fuck if you bleed all over the bed and me. It doesn't bother me."

She settles back into the bed with me and snuggles into my chest. "Thank you for taking care of your hormonal wife."

I chuckle. "It's my job, Anastasia. We made vows, remember? Plus, this is good practice for when you do become pregnant. By the way Elliot talks, you might become Satan at any time. I believe he called her wifezilla on more than one occasion."

She giggles. "I'll try my best not to be a wifezilla."

One Month Later...

Ana and I have been fucking like rabbits this past month, only stopping for a day or two every once in awhile when I saw her wincing in bed. My balls haven't gotten this much use since I hit puberty and jacked off every minute I could. I'm just hoping they're keeping up. I almost laugh at the thought.

We're at my parent's house for Sunday dinner and both of us are trying to hold in our excitement. Anastasia is now two days late. She took a pregnancy test the first day she was late and it was negative, but I know that there is still a large possibility that it couldn't read her hormone levels, yet. Tonight, we are heading home to take another test and I find myself wishing that dinner was over...hell, it hasn't even started, yet. We're still waiting for the Parmesan chicken to bake along with the sweet potatoes and vegetables. It's amazing that I'm not three hundred pounds with all these amazing cooks around me. Thank God for my home gym.

I hear footsteps down the hall and turn from my seat on the couch to see that it's Anastasia. She has a look of sorrow on her face and a sharp pain runs through my chest.

I wave her over to me and she climbs in my lap, hiding in my neck. She cries silently as I rock her, stroking her hair.

"I'm so sorry, angel." I whisper in her ear as I rock her.

She sniffles. "I'm sorry, too." It's muffled against my neck, but I hear it. I squeeze her tighter to me.

"We'll just have to try again."

She lets out a sob and the pain in my chest seems to grow. The blow is so much harder since we spent two days excited about the possibility of a baby Grey.

"Christian? Ana? What's wrong?" Kate finds us on the couch and her question alerts my mother and Elliot.

I shake my head towards the three of them and wave them off. Although I appreciate their worry, this is between Anastasia and me. We've decided not to tell anyone we're trying just in case there are issues. When my mother ushers them out, I press my face to the top of her head and hold her as snug as I can. I can feel my own tears wanting to escape, but I force them back. It would tear Anastasia to pieces to see me so upset. She'd blame herself for this, when it's no one's fault.

"I'm scared."

I pull my face away from her hair. "Why, baby?"

Sniffling, she sits up a little, but leans against me. "What if I have the same problems my parents had? What if we have a hard time trying? What if...what if I get pregnant, but I'm not as lucky as Mom and I lose the baby...or we both end up-"

"No. Don't say it." I put my finger up to her mouth to silence her. "That would never happen. I would never let anything happen to you."

"But...what if I lose the baby? What if I can't have any?"

I shake my head. "We will cross that road when we come to it, baby. And if we lose the baby...well, we'll get through it together."

She chews her lip, refusing to make eye contact with me.

"Hey." I lift her chin so that she'll look at me. "Have you changed your mind? Do you not want one?"

She shrugs. "I don't know. I'm just scared."

"Ana...we'll get through this together. If you don't want to go through with the pregnancy, then I'll support you...but, isn't being a mother something you always dreamed of? Are you going to let your worry get in your way of having something extraordinary? Just think...what would have happened if you were too scared to tell me what that asshole, Sorrento, was doing to you? If you weren't brave enough to confide in me, we wouldn't be where we are now. Just imagine what life would have been like."

She gives me a sad smile. "I was scared then...but, there was something about you...I felt safe with you."

I press my lips to hers. "See? And you still are safe with me. There is nothing that will tear us apart. If you want to go on this journey with me, then we'll get through it together. We'll lean on one another if something bad happens and we'll celebrate together when the good happens. Just think about it, sweet girl. You don't have to tell me right now. You've got this week to think about it. I don't want you making a decision you'll end up regretting later. I'll support you no matter what you decide."

She nods. "Thank you, Christian. This is all just so emotional... you're right. I think I need a little while to think about it. I don't know if I could handle losing a child. Just the thought makes me want to cry now. I'm sorry I'm such a basket case over this whole thing. I had always wanted a child, but when we ended up together and I knew you'd probably never want one...and then you validated that you didn't want one, I never thought about what could happen if we did have one. I feel awful, Christian. I feel like I led you on without thinking it over..."

I press my lips to hers again to reassure her. "Baby...there is no reason to be sorry. Take your time."

"Okay." She gives me a smile and presses her lips to mine one last time before standing. "Do you mind if I have some wine tonight since I'm on my period? I need something to relax me."

I shake my head. "No, of course not. I think I'll have a glass, too." I stand and take her hand so we can go look for a bottle of wine.

We eat dinner, partaking in everyone else's conversation, but I can feel the sadness between the two of us. My heart is heavy, knowing we might not end up having a child, and I'm annoyed with myself over it. It wasn't even two months ago, I was adamant about never having children...and now...well, my heart aches with the threat of being childless hanging over it. I'm determined to keep myself neutral, not wanting to persuade her decision either way. My desire to have a child is my problem, and I will not force my wife to carry him/her if she isn't completely willing.

*Ana's POV*

I am so confused by all of this. I've always been so certain I'd become a mother one day...but I never really thought through everything that could happen. I knew there was always a chance that I'd have problems getting pregnant...but it was never really an issue. At least, not until now. I don't understand it. Christian and I have been on each other non-stop. We hadn't even given my body a chance to rid itself of his sperm before we had sex again. It should have worked. If I was completely healthy, it should have worked. What's wrong with me? What if I have the same problem that my mother had? What if I'm completely infertile and I can't even have a child at all? What if I miscarry?

The thought of our child dying is heart wrenching. I don't know if I could ever forgive myself for it. What if Christian can't forgive me for it? Losing the baby and him...well, I just couldn't bear it. I know that he said I shouldn't let my fear control me...but this...I don't know. I don't know if I'm strong enough to handle the consequences if I do have something wrong with me. I've got so much to think about. I'm lucky to have such an understanding husband. I know he was happy to start trying, but it doesn't seem to phase him much...the thought of not having any, that is. We could always adopt. I want to do that anyway. He seemed to like that idea.

A part of me wonders if I'd ever regret not taking the opportunity to carry my own though. Am I going to be sixty, looking back and kicking myself over the lost opportunity? Carrying my own...carrying Christian's...it would be such a precious gift.

I wonder what our child would look like if we had one...Would they have his copper hair and gray eyes? Or my dark hair and blue eyes? Maybe a mixture of both. I hope they have his cheek bones...

I hear a cry, knocking me out of my thoughts, and Kate puts down her fork to go get Ava.

"Eat, Kate. I'll get her. You never get to eat a full meal." I tell her, standing to get my niece from her swing in the sitting room. I check her diaper and see that it's still dry, so I bring her back with me, sticking a paci in her mouth to help quiet her. Kate fed her just thirty minutes ago. She shouldn't be hungry. She quiets down quickly, content with just being cuddled for the time being.

I sit back in my chair and rock her a little while she stares up at me.

"She has got to be the cutest thing I have ever seen." She's incredible.

"She is. She was worth every ache, every mood swing, every craving, and every stretch mark." Kate confesses.

"I agree." Mia says, being cheeky.

"Was there ever a time when you were pregnant...or when you were rushed to the hospital, that you thought you wished things happened differently?" I can't help it, I have to ask.

Kate shakes her head. "As soon as I found out I was pregnant with her... saw her on the ultrasound... I felt this bond. I was growing this life inside me. A life that God allowed to happen. I knew she was made for a reason. She became the most important thing in my life. The most precious. Even if I wouldn't have made it in the operating room...just spending those months growing her...it would have been worth it."

I tear up, and so do the other girls.

"There was a small amount of time...when Kate passed out at the hospital that I thought 'What the fuck did we do?'...but as soon as I saw her face... when she blinked up at me. Fuck...it was the most incredible experience I've ever had. Being a dad is awesome. It's the best job I could ever have." Elliot confesses.

I grin down at my perfect little niece and see that her eyes are closed and she's fallen back to sleep.

"It's also the most rewarding job you'll ever have. Adopting you three was the best decision your mom and I have ever made." Mr. Grey states, making all of us tear up just a little more.

"Enough with this sappy shit. You're going to make me cry in front of my own kid."

"Elliot! I wish you'd stop swearing so often! At this rate, Ava's first word is going to be an expletive!" Grace admonishes, making us laugh.

They fall into easy conversation over how to decorate Ava's room here, but I'm content just rocking little Ava. My eyes wander over to my glass of wine...a glass I only took a few sips out of. I reach for it and slide it towards Christian. He watches my hand and then follows my arm up until he finds my eyes.

"I'm not drinking anymore." I state. Listening to Kate made me realize that if it is meant to be it will happen and it will be worth everything we go through. Ava is an incredible little girl and I have so much love for her...I can't imagine how it'll feel when I have my own baby. I want this. It's worth the risk. I want the experience of carrying my baby if the Lord wills it to be.

I watch a smile form on his face, realization setting in. "No?"

I shake my head and return his smile. "No."

Leaning over, he kisses me deeply. "Thank you, Ana."

"Thank you for understanding." I whisper back to him, pressing my lips to his again.