Author's note: Thanks everyone for your comments...im so happy u all like it..

ok so this chapter is NOT chapter 12. Let me tell you how this chapter happened.

I was sleepy but I felt inspired so I was sitting in my bed writing…and I was writing fast too! So I finished a whole chapter in like an hour or so. I was very proud then... as I was falling asleep…I had a drastic change of heart. I thought…This is not right ..this is sooo out of character, for Edward and jasper. Edward would never talk about this stuff and jasper..Jasper is a guy in tune with your deepest sincerest feelings that you cant hide at all….he wouldn't misunderstand.

Any hoo, I just thought you might want to know what was going on in my head. If you don't like it well don't worry, I changed the direction completely. Will post the real chapter 12 soon that is before nxt Monday…maybe Sunday night.

Enjoy! Or not…

Jealousy

That week went on in the same pattern. Alice, Esme and I would stay home during the day doing various things around the house. Alice and I were growing closer and closer. I was so in tune with her now I could almost tell what she was thinking just by the tone of her emotions.

Sometimes, when I wasn't expecting it, she would just spring onto me and assault me with kisses. I enjoyed that. I couldn't fight my attachment to her at all- not that I wanted to. It was like I could only be happy when she was happy and I would do anything to keep her happy. This wasn't exactly a hard thing to do because she was just naturally blissful, and that attracted me like a moth to a flame.

Almost everyday, sometimes more than once, Alice would ask me to let her practice her resistance. I tried to explain that it wasn't something that could be resisted. I was like me trying to hide my future from her but she insisted and I, I couldn't deny her. She made me do different emotions; anger, embarrassment, shyness, annoyance. She couldn't resist any but she refused to give up.

On evenings, Carlisle would bring home another pile of clothes and he'd make us stay near it and play chess or scrabble. Alice wanted to play Edward in chess, determined to beat him. She was actually getting better. Her strategy had improved somewhat. She practiced with me during the day. She'd always win but she learnt different attacks. Every evening, Edward would beat her again. He must have seen her frustration at herself and so he offered to teach her to play the piano.

She was so excited; he could hardly get her to sit still. I watched as he showed her the keys, placing her fingers on the right notes, feeding her encouraging words when she made mistakes. Everyday the fondness he felt toward her grew. Before he walked through the door, he'd be filled with anticipation and as soon as he caught sight of her, he'd relax, like suddenly he was comfortable. It grew and grew until there was something like trust that existed between them. They had some sort of kinship that I did not understand. But it was not just him. Alice loved talking to him. She found his sarcastic nature endearing.

His left arm was around her now, guiding her hand across the keys. He laughed out loud at her frustrated expression. She was having trouble.

"Jasper," called Rosalie from behind me. Edward looked at her with a tired expression.

"Yes, Rosalie," I answered

"Come with me," I followed her out the door and across the cobblestone and a little bit further. Then she stopped and turned to me.

"I hate it when Edward knows what I'm thinking," she explained.

"Shouldn't you be used to that by now?"

"I am but certain things, I like to keep private," she eyed my confused face and continued, " I don't know what you think about us, Jasper, I hope you are comfortable here but I cant help but notice some things." She stopped and thought for a minute, she was trying to figure out how to explain what she wanted to say.

"Edward is a sour puss. He hates being around people and I think it's because he feels odd…with the whole mind reading thing. I will admit…sometimes, it really irks me but that doesn't mean that I don't want him around. I think also that he doesn't want us to feel…intruded upon and so that's why he leaves ever so often."

I was struggling to understand where this conversation was going. Her aura suddenly turned warm.

"Ever since you and Alice came, he's been happier than I've seen him in years. I think now we have a good chance to hold onto him. I like having him here."

I was just beginning to understand Rosalie. I had only ever seen she and Edward exchange a few snappy words but I hadn't realized how much she cared for him. This revelation though, was overshadowed by something that began to corrode my insides. Was Edward falling in love with Alice? The thought made a rush of anger surge through me. Rosalie must have felt my tension and quickly sought to reassure me, "Jasper, I know Edward, he would never, ever, seek to steal Alice from you. Please believe me. I just thought you should know that we all like having you here." She smiled at me. She was telling the truth.

"I'm not worried about Edward, Rosalie, but thank you." I was lying. I was worried about it. More precisely I was worried that Alice would fall in love with him. The thought almost brought me to my knees. When had I become so weak? I thought back to the emotions running through Edward and Alice. I tried to understand what position he was in.

"Don't think about this when you are around him," she commanded coldly, "I don't want him to misguidedly think that I'm going mushy." I nodded and forced a smile.

I tried to do as Rosalie said but as I walked back into the house and saw the two of them playing a duet, I figured it out. Rosalie was right; Edward did feel odd when he was around the Cullens. None of them had any 'extra abilities' and he did not like denying them privacy. He finally felt comfortable with someone, someone who could share in his omniscience. Why did that someone have to be Alice? Was I going to lose her like this? Lose her to someone that could understand, someone who could see exactly what she could see? But I could understand. I couldn't see what she could see but I could understand.

Edward's head snapped up, the music stopped abruptly. He looked at me worriedly.

"Edward, come on," whined Alice.

"I need to talk to Jasper for a minute, you stay here and practice your scales," He said as he walked over to meet me. He was very concerned…about me?

"Jasper, lets go upstairs," my insides wrung with animosity as I followed him up the stairs. Though I wanted so badly to hate him, I could not. It was a product of being able to see through any and every façade to the undeniable true emotions that a person felt. I could not blame him for feeling acceptance… it was what we were all looking for. But I had found her first. He had no right to take away my other half, even if he could understand her in ways I could not.

"Ah, Jasper," he began as we reached the upstairs balcony. I felt a bit comforted at the sight of the broken railing.

" Jasper, please do not see me as an adversary. I do not love Alice the way you do. You are not going to lose her. I swear to you Jasper, I've lived with two pairs of perfectly matched lovers for many years and I know love when I see it. You and Alice…that's it.

I couldn't believe it. I knew for a fact that he was sincere. I could feel him willing me to understand. But what about her? Did she still want me like she said she did?

" You really do not have to worry about whether or not she loves you," he said, more relaxed now, " You are in her every thought"

Well that made me relax. I was still uneasy about their kinship though, I did not understand it.

"It amazing, the deductions you can make out of emotions. Your earlier thoughts, about feeling comfortable, spot –on. But I wouldn't call it omniscience. Alice is nearer to that than I am," he said.

As he spoke of Alice, a warmth filled him, a warmth that I recognized.

"You love her," I stated. There was no doubt about what was inside him.

"Yes, but not like you do," he answered simply.

"You would die for her," again, it was a statement.

"I would die for either of my sisters. I love them immensely. They both have a purpose or at least a reason to live,"

Bitterness seeped into him now. " Rosalie has Emmett and Alice has you, Esme and Carlisle have each other… you all have reasons to be here…I love them all and they all deserve the good in their…non-life"

And now I understood completely. He did not hate us for having love. He loved his family enough to want hem to be happy…he just didn't like to stick around to watch. He put his hand on my shoulder and said, "Brother, you love her and she loves you. Now, what are you going to do?"

Were all my fears groundless then? If I love her and she loves me…then what was the problem?

"That's what everyone here wants to know," his tone was amused, "It's the question that's been burning every member of this family since you arrived. Everyone sees your chemistry, your connection…why haven't you asked her to marry you?"

Well that threw me. Damn my lack of humanity. I should have thought of that. I was just so unfamiliar with the whole love business. Marriage…vampires usually just pair up, marriage was a human thing. The Cullens lived more humanly than vampiricly, when it came right down to it. The pairs here were all married, they belonged to each other. I wanted Alice. I wanted her to be mine.

"That's what marriage means," he said nonchalantly, "But wait, I think I've figured out something about her visions. She can only see the future after you have made the decision. So do not decide now, else she will see.

Author's note: see what I mean totally out of character right???? I like the beginning only but hate the rest. Anyway I'm my worst critic so tell me what you think.

Love

taz