A/N: Thanks so much for your reviews and well wishes – for the guests that leave kind reviews, thank you so much, I wish I could respond to you directly.
Sorry, but delays are my new normal. I am getting back into work and it takes a lot out of me – I used to have tons more energy – and though I know it is normal considering what my body has been through it is no less frustrating.
I seriously considered not finishing this story b/c I found depressing a perceived lack of interest on the part of readers (i.e. low viewing numbers and reviews) – but I'm no quitter, I plan to finish what I started. There are just a few more chapters to go actually I think the max will be twenty-five.
Thanks to the FSOG Facebook groups for your support.
Chapter 19 – Aftermath
EamonPOV
"Where the hell do you think you're going?"
"Your wife…well, your soon to be ex-wife is selling this place – do you expect me to stay here until I am thrown out in the street? Besides – this just is not working for me anymore. We were never, ever meant to be a full-time forever thing anyway." She remarks with an inelegant hunch of her shoulders.
"Of course…my wife told me all about your boy toy. I had no idea you were…"
"No idea I was what? Did I demand that you only sleep with your wife and me? For chrissake Eamon, grow up."
"I was not trying to make demands Donna, but I thought we had something…."
"We did…now we don't. Would we even be having this discussion if your wife and kids had not kicked you to the curb? I mean be serious, were you going to propose marriage Eamon, were we going to run off into the sunset like some Nicholas Sparks characters?"
"So…this is it? If it wasn't for you…" I mumble to myself.
"Oh no! You own this dumpster fire Eamon. I lost my job and my reputation is pure shit – I am just praying that my contacts on the east coast will help me to get my life back on track. You came out of this smelling like a rose compared to the shit stain I call a life. Hell, I have lost everything while you are still COO of the company you built and you make…what about five million a year? So what if you report to your ex-wife and children – they allotted you a decent share of the company, so what if it is no longer the majority. All I am left with a sullied reputation both personally and professionally and you have the unmitigated gall to attempt laying the blame for our joint fuck up at my feet alone? Classy!"
"That is not what I meant!" I say trying to calm myself. "What I meant was our relationship was what pushed Diane over the edge, I was not insinuating that it was your fault alone."
"Water under the bridge honey, it was fun even if I cannot say it was worth all the carnage. Take care Eamon." She says with a parting kiss to my cheek.
After the meal from hell my life has been in a free-fall, I admit that Donna has a point, there are certainly those who are worse off than I am professionally and fiscally for that matter, but my personal life is non-existent. My family hates me, well I have no family now - but I have never been more clear – I know exactly who to blame for all of this and if it is the last thing I do, I will get my revenge.
CPOV
"Fine, you're fired…for six weeks minimum." I say with a smirk and wink to the amusement of my wife and Lillian, who has informed us that Sawyer is going to blow his rehab straight to hell because he thinks being a big tough guy means he does not need the time to heal.
This guy refuses to take his meds as prescribed, has been caught lifting heavier and recommended objects, balks at the idea of rehab in general and drove to Walmart after only being out of the hospital for two days ignoring strict instructions that included no driving for at least two weeks. At that point Lillian asked that I speak with him, he refused to listen, so I fired his ass.
"Boss, come on…I can't just sit around…" I can hardly hold back my laughter.
"You will not be sitting around, you will be enduring some very intensive rehabilitation therapy. You cannot return to work until the doctor gives you the okay and – I have to be satisfied that you're ready for prime time. Understand?" He acquiesces with a look that would convince anyone not privy to our conversation that he had been given news of some terminal illness, he needs to get over himself, big baby. "Luke, you are responsible for the person most precious to me. You will not be responsible for my wife until you are one hundred percent, and if Lillian tells me that you continue pouting about this I will make it eight weeks."
"Fine!" He says exasperated, shaking his head at Lillian in amused frustration.
"Christian, what you did for Lillian was so sweet – no way was he going to listen to her."
"My motives were not completely altruistic Ana, I meant what I said about his being one hundred percent in order to take care of you. You are my entire universe." I say cupping the side of her face with my left hand while pulling her towards me with my right at her waist.
"I love you."
"I love you too."
###
Six months later
"Yes, oh god Christian I'm coming!"
My wife woke this morning the same way she has on so many mornings, with me feasting between her legs. What can I say – she is still the best part of waking up, fuck that bullshit commercial coffee jingle, they have nothing on this. I was never a huge fan of eating pussy before Ana – sure I would indulge, but it was always a selfish means to an end, and that end was my pleasure. I was not missing out or leaving my subs unsatisfied or anything – I just never felt connected to a woman in the way that I do with my wife – sure I enjoyed making women cream, but again it was more about the sense of satisfaction it gave me in controlling the pleasure of a woman than actually caring if it was good for her. Ana changed all of that, she changed me – the first time I came while eating her was the most emotionally transformative sexual experience of my life to that point. I understood what love making meant, what it meant to be wholly owned bodily and soulfully by another – her pleasure was literally my pleasure.
I slam my throbbing dick into her before she has time to recover from her orgasm and – fuuck she feels so good.
"Ana baby, god your pussy is so wet baby." I almost sob as she almost wildly thrusts her pelvis and runs her nails down my back in concert with her movements. How did I ever live without her touch? I watch her beneath me, her eyes never leaving mine as they crinkle, her involuntary tell – well, that and her pussy tightening around my dick like a vice grip – that she is falling over the edge, and I increase my pace as we both yell out our release.
We lie in bed holding each other in our post coital bliss.
"How is the vertical and signage looking for the Acer acquisition?"
"I took your advice and decided on a more hands off approach for that one." I say lightly pinching her nipple. "Ros is going to update me by week's end - how are things now that El finally convinced his wife to start her maternity leave?"
"Busy, but with Jose stepping up it has been mostly seamless. I have had to train him in a few areas, but he is on the ball actually. Of course Kate still calls in to net meetings and though I can tell she misses being at work, I think EJ is at the forefront of her every thought these days."
My brother and Kate married just after the big blow up at her parent's home, and though I cannot believe I am even thinking such a thing – Kate is the absolute best thing that has ever happened to him, El has grown up and is a terrific husband and I know he will be an amazing father – he loves his kid more than his own life and he's not even here yet.
Diane decided to move from the family home – leaving it to Kate and Ethan to decide its fate. She now lives in our former home at Escala and is dating my head of legal Jim Buruss whom she met after reluctantly attending the GEH Christmas party some months ago – the poor guy never stood a chance and could not take his eyes off of her. Jim lost his childhood sweetheart and wife to cancer years ago, we learned from his adult twin daughters that he pretty much had given up on life after his wife died – becoming a shell of himself in every aspect of his life – except for professionally. They were floored by their father's distraction with Diane and asked if Ana would make an introduction, which she happily obliged. Neither Kate nor Ethan wanted to live in the house they grew up in so they decided to have it demolished and agreed that Kate and El would build their new home there, meaning we will live close to each other again very soon.
APOV
"Jose, have a seat."
"That does not sound good boss lady."
"Why? Is there something you need to tell me?"
"Not at all – I just want to do the very best job I can."
"And I want you to know that you have been doing wonderfully in Kate's absence. The two placements you made at GEH are working out masterfully – I could not have done better myself."
He lets out a sigh of relief.
"We have been called upon to staff a technology start up with several hundred millions in contracts and assets. It would be our greatest acquisition to date."
"So we will start with HR and then work…"
"No, we will staff all aspects of the company from HR, the executive support staff, IT to the mailroom…simultaneously. Here are schematics and organizational chart, I want a preliminary list of department heads by no later than COB on Wednesday." I say sliding the folder across the desk to him, which he eagerly takes.
"Yes Ma'am – I cannot wait to get started, thank you for your confidence in me Ana."
"Now, this one is a bit tricky – there are current employees from the defunct organization that need to be absorbed or dismissed – I need you to determine based on performance records and interviews – which you will have to arrange either by net meeting, phone or questionnaire because of the quick turnaround – which employees will be retained and in what capacity. Delegate where you need to, but this is your baby. I have emailed you the employee files."
He takes a deep breath – and smiles an elated and determined smile.
"I will not let you or Elite down Ana." He says looking directly into my eyes, he is now serious and all business.
"I have every faith in you Jose."
###
"Hello Mama." I say as my best friend and sister-in-law pops up on my screen.
"Ana! Hey!"
"The nursery looks amazing Kate, from what I can see. Elliot did a fantastic job."
"He did didn't he? I had input, but honestly Ana what you see is mostly El and my Mom of course – between the two of them I hardly get to take a piss on my own." We both laugh. My nephew is going to be one colorful child with these two potty mouths as parents.
"How are things at the office?"
"Things are going well, I have listened to Christian and I am delegating. We are very busy as you know and Jose has stepped up in a big way…"
"So we're talking partnership." Kate always could read my mind like no other.
"Yes, I want to see how he handles Markum Tech…"
"Whoa! That is one hell of a test run Ana…"
"You and I trained him." I remind her, raising an eyebrow because it is the second time she has cut me off during this short chat, and she reacts to my now obvious albeit mild annoyance.
"Sorry, you know I trust you and your judgment implicitly Ana. I promise you it is the hormones, my controlling nature and boredom and not a reflection of my faith in my partner…partners." She says with a wink.
"I know that – I have not seen that Kate in a long while – she no longer exists."
"Ana, how on earth did you put up with me? I sucked ass!"
We both laugh at her crass description – though we know her disposition caused us both pain at various times.
"Water under the bridge. And to answer your question – I always saw who you were, not who you portrayed I guess. I saw you as wonderfully flawed and as a person who in spite of not always showing it – I knew you loved me. You have always been my sister, I could never give up on you."
"Thank you for always being a true friend Ana." She says her eyes glistening.
"I cannot believe I'm so happy."
Fighting back tears we both grin like fools as she talks about due dates, mucus plugs and swollen ankles. Kate can make talking about anything, both funny and interesting. It is amusing sometimes how our life plans change in spite of what we think we want.
###
"Sweetie, are you free for lunch on Thursday?" I ask, pulling the Cobb salads Gail prepared from the vegetable bin and placing them on the breakfast bar.
"I will make sure I am – for you? Anything."
"I have my appointment with Dr. Bynum for my shot and I can stop by after…" I am stopped in the midst of my reluctant declaration by my husband's forlorn look.
"Christian, what is it?"
"Ana, I know we have had this discussion before, but being around El and Kate…"
"Oh, thank god!" I interrupt hating interruptions as I do while letting go of a breath I did not realize I was holding.
"I want a baby!" We both blurt out as though it is a dying declaration on both our parts.
"I doubt I am pregnant just yet, but it won't take many more nights like this before I am." I grin in satisfied bliss after round…I've lost count.
"Ana, you just told me you want our baby – there is nothing sexier." Christian squeezes me closer while planting kisses on my shoulder from behind.
"Like you needed an excuse, I chide playfully, looking back at him over my shoulder."
"Guilty…" he smiles absentmindedly playing with a lock of my hair.
"I thought I wanted to wait and spend more time having you all to myself, but watching El and Kate – I…I just could not stop myself from imagining you carrying our child and us chasing little ChrisAna around in the meadow." I turn over so I am resting my cheek on my hands spread on his chest and I am looking up into his eyes. I see pure love and devotion.
"I feel the same way Christian, I had been dreading my appointment."
"Really? Why did you keep it to yourself?"
"I wasn't sure you would be ready and I never want to force my will because I know you will do anything to make me happy even if you were apprehensive."
"That is true, but not because I am some emotional hostage Ana, it's because my happiness is rooted in yours. If I was apprehensive at all it would have been because of my insecurities about being good enough or capable and trust me I have thought long and hard over these eight months with El. And no matter how I tried to ignore that…that pull that tugging at my heart, I knew I want to be as big an idiot as he is right now, blabbering about changing tables and receiving blankets." He says laughing before admitting he has no idea what either item is.
CPOV
"Sir, there has not been any news about Mrs. Lincoln or any hints to her whereabouts for months now. If I may speak freely sir?"
"Please."
"Either she has fled the country or she has died. In order to both evade capture and remain hidden for as long as she has managed she would have to have help and since she had fractured practically every relationship she had that would have been of benefit to her in her circumstance I do not believe anyone is helping her. I also believe that of all her former acquaintances, you sir would have been the only one possessing the means by which she could have disappeared with this kind of blinding path obscuring precision. Another reason I believe she is no longer alive is that her obsession with you would not allow her to simply move on. She felt entitled to you in a way that dispossessed her of all rational thought and self-preservation – she would have never just left you alone."
I know he is right. I just have trouble letting go of the notion that just when I decide to let my guard down where she is concerned she will pop up again to wreak havoc in our lives.
"Sir?" Taylor interrupts my thoughts.
"What is this about? Is there something I need to know?"
I smile at the thoughts of my conversation with Ana over the last few days. Having decided we are both ready to start a family and with today being the point of no return as Ana plans to meet with Dr. Bynum and inform her that we are beginning family planning with the first step being – no more birth control shots.
"Well…yes in a way." I sigh and begin talking wanting to eliminate that concerned wrinkle across his brow.
"Ana and I have decided to have a baby and I just want to be certain we cover all bases in terms of security risks." The stoic mountain that is Taylor visibly relaxes and if I did not know better I would swear that was a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
"I will triple our efforts to find any evidence of Mrs. Lincoln's whereabouts sir. If she is alive I will find her."
"Thank you Taylor."
"You are very welcome sir."
"Hey Chris!" Elliot practically shouts barreling into my office in his usual bull meets china closet gait.
El was always touchy feely – but with his son on the way he is so much more so. His big brother kiss on the top of my head has morphed into a macho man hug and some variation of 'love you guy' he is all about the love these days and it is amazing.
After we shoot the shit for a while – I share with him my concerns about Elena reappearing in our lives when we least expect it leaving out Ana and my plans for a family, and he does his best to reassure me.
"Chris, I honestly believe the old hag is gone for good – she is facing prison if she ever slithers out from under her rock. Please remember, your security is top notch wherever you go and your home is like a fuckin' fortress. You can relax little brother, she will never hurt you or Ana again – enjoy your life, her power over you is over."
"I know what you are saying is true – hell Taylor even thinks she could be dead…"
"I wasn't sure how you would react, but I think so too." He interrupts shrugging in a matter of fact manner that betrays the emotion similar to that of a man ordering a pizza.
"Why were you unsure of how I would react?"
"Well you have always had a soft spot for her crazy ass – and she was obsessed with you – the only way she would have stayed away from you this long is if she could not get to you. I know you don't love her or anything close to it – but you have in spite of all of your self-loathing shit a heart of gold. You could never wish anyone, not even her any ill will."
Elliot is right in that he knows I actually have a heart – this much is true, I would however, destroy anything or anyone that sought to harm my family and that includes him, Kate and my nephew – Elena would meet a most unfortunate fate if she were to fuck with any member of my family.
El and Taylor are right – I owe it to myself and to Ana and our future family not to allow Elena to invade our thoughts and – she has not been seen in months and she still has that slither of control. I have to trust the systems that are in place for our safety. I have to enjoy my love and life, and though I will not call off Taylor's tripled down efforts, but I will insist he only tell me if there is a new development – I will never bring her up in conversation again. I refuse to live in fear, after all that is what she always wanted to remain forefront in my life. I decide today that out of sight will be out of mind. Finally.