Wake me up inside

Wake me up inside

Call my name and save me from the dark

Bid my blood to run

Before I come undone

Save me from the nothing I've become

Now that I know what I'm without

You can't just leave me

Breathe into me and make me real

Bring me to life

Rori's mouth was dry and her eyes were so heavy she could barely open them. She was in some kind of hospital. The walls were blue and ornately embellished with stained glass style windows and lighting fixtures. Steve, Danny and Hank were sleeping in a couple beds up against the wall on the other side of the room. Hank was sprawled on one bed with a leg hanging off the side. Steve and Danny were sitting on the other, hands intertwined, Danny's head on Steve's shoulder and Steve's head resting against Danny's. There was no sign of John in the room.

A familiar pinch in her arm told her she had an IV line. So, not dead then. She reached up to her neck and felt a bandage where the bug had been. No bug and she could actually move her arm.

"Welcome back, Las," a doctor said as he walked in. His voice was thick with a Scottish accent and a kind, soothing tone.

"Where am I?" she asked.

"You're in Atlantis," the man said. "I'm Dr. Carson Beckett, I've been treating you since you arrived."

"Ronan?" she asked.

"Safe and sound, thanks to you and your family," Beckett said.

Rori glanced around the room, still no sign of John. She tried to fight back a fearful tear, but it slid down her cheek anyway. "Where's John?" she asked.

"Oh, love, he's just fine. He's with the Board at the moment. Colonel Lorne insisted on speaking with him," Beckett said. "He didn't want to leave your side. None of them have."

"It's what we do," she replied.

"You have a very supportive family," he said. He rested his hand on her arm and his expression changed to the same one Hank got when he had bad news for a patient.

"What?" she asked.

"There's something I need to talk to you about, would you like me to wake one of them?" he asked.

"Let them sleep, what is it?" she asked.

"You're pregnant, Rorianna," he said.

"Seriously?"

"Yes," Dr. Beckett said. He didn't look like it was good news. His face was still set in that bad-news look.

"Something's wrong, isn't it?" she asked.

"You're good at this," he said.

"I'm a cop and I spend quite a bit of time with a doctor," she said. "So, I ask again, what's wrong?"

He pulled a stool over and sat next to her. "There's no way to know how the exposure to the Eratis Bug will affect the baby," he said. "The Eratis, or Wraith, DNA is particularly tenacious."

Rori bit her lip and watched the guys across the room for a second to let the news sink in. She was afraid to allow herself to hope for normalcy, for happy. "I can't tell them until I know there's nothing wrong with the baby."

"That's your right, but let's not jump to conclusions," Dr. Beckett said. "I'd like to do an ultra sound. We can do it discreetly, if you'd like." She nodded. "Let's take you into another room so we don't wake them." He wheeled her bed into the other room as quietly as possible. "I'll go get the ultrasound and we'll get started."

He left her alone in the room. It was so quiet. She was never alone, never. The silence was deafening and, luckily, didn't last long as Dr. Beckett came back with some equipment.

"Do you know how far along you might be?" he asked as he started preparing the ultrasound equipment.

"I don't track that stuff because have a IUD, I didn't really think this was possible," she said. "So I couldn't even make an educated guess."

She jumped a little at the shock from the cold gel that Dr. Beckett was putting on her stomach. He gave her an apologetic look as he put the ultrasound wand against her stomach. He was quiet for several minutes as he examined what he was seeing on the screen.

"Dr. Beckett, what do you see?" she asked.

"Everything looks normal, except…" he said. He trailed off as he concentrated on something on the screen.

"Except what?" she asked.

"There's no heartbeat, dear," he said.

"So the baby is dead?" she asked. She didn't want to hear the answer, but at the same time she needed to hear it. She braced herself for his answer. Of course the baby was dead, she didn't get to have good things happen to her without disastrous consequences.

"Not necessarily," Dr. Beckett said. "It looks like you're only about five weeks in, which is a little early to see a heartbeat."

"I don't mean to sound negative, but I can't…" she said. "I can't be hopeful, there are too many things counting against this baby."

"From what I understand you've just gotten married, untraditional, but married all the same. This baby has a very strong mother and four honorable men to raise it. What are you worried about?" Dr. Beckett asked.

"I'm not afraid of being a mom, or them being dads, they're fantastic with Danny's kid's. I'm afraid of failing again," she said. She could still see her little girls' smiles and sometimes imagined she could hear their playful laughs down the hall. "I lost my daughters and husband a few years back. I couldn't protect them."

"This will be different," he said.

"I have other medical concerns, too," she said. "I'm a smoker. Steve and Danny were exposed to radiation on more than one occasion. John was exposed to God knows what out here. About the only safe option is if Hank is the dad and, by some miracle, my smoking hasn't hurt it. It's so much for a little one to overcome."

"Those things don't automatically mean that your child will be predisposed to anything," he said. "You'll need to quit smoking immediately and we'll keep an eye on the baby for a few days, maybe a week, and see how it goes." Rori nodded. She took a steadying breath and fought back the tears, again. Damn pregnancy hormones. She was a strong, powerful, brave woman. She wasn't supposed to cry. "I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure you and the baby perfectly fine."

"You can't help what's already done," she said.

Beckett, apparently, wasn't sure what to say because he gave her a sad smile and took the ultrasound equipment out. She heard John and Dr. Beckett talking outside the room and wiped the tears away from her face. John came in a moment later and stopped a few feet away from the bed.

"Hey you," he said. "How are you feeling?"

"Well, I'm alive," she said. "I was sure I'd completely lost this time."

"What are you talking about? We got your back, babe," he said as he sat on the stool Dr. Beckett had just vacated. "I'm sorry," he said softly after a short pause.

"For?" she asked.

"Everything," he said. "You know I have trouble expressing my feelings and stuff."

"I think you express just fine," she said. She reached for his hand and gave it a light squeeze. "More than you know."

"So, we're okay?" he asked.

"John, you chose me. You've always chosen me. No matter what the other option might have been, no who else was involved or any consequences you might have endured. I could never be mad at you," she said. She thought about telling him about the baby, but she couldn't. If the baby wasn't going to make it, she didn't want him to blame himself, and he would. So, she didn't say anything. "The guys still asleep in the other room?"

"Yup," he replied.

"Have you rested yet?" she asked.

"No, I had to meet with Colonel Lorne about getting us home. It's gonna be a little bit, I guess Dr. Beckett wants to keep you for observation," he said.

"That's what he said. We're due back in Albuquerque tomorrow," she pointed out. Normally, she would just call Governor Gutierrez and explain that they'd gotten caught up with a personal matter, but she didn't exactly have cell service in Atlantis.

"Sam is taking care of it. She's letting the Governor know that the Air Force borrowed us for a mission in the Amazon Forest where you were attacked by a vampire," John said.

"Seriously?" she asked. He busted out in a grin. "You're joking, I wondered how long it would take you." She had called his scar the vampire bite for as long as she'd known him, it was only fair.

"Got you though," he said. More serious he added, "No, she's passing on that the Air Force borrowed us for a mission that had unforeseen complications and you were injured. That you're okay, but you need some recovery time before transport back to the states." That was definitely more believable. He climbed up into the bed with her and pulled her close. He kissed the top over head and breathed in deep. "I thought I lost you."

"I thought so, too," she replied. "You should go get some rest."

"I'm gonna get some rest right here, holding you," he said and squeezed her tight. "I love you, Rorianna."

"I love you too," she said. She snuggled against his chest and let herself drift off to sleep.