Splatoon: The Drafted Squid
Follow the Leader
The Octoling commander, with her Splatoon of Octotroopers idly drifting by on their little platforms journeyed through the hills, weapons ready to blast any unfortunate squid that came their way at a moment's notice. Through hills and grasslands they roamed, with the Octoling at the head growing increasingly worried, glancing around from hill to beyond. She hummed to herself, toting the Octoshot gun by her side, finger hovering above the trigger just in case a smart guy decided to try something funny. Unfortunately for her itchy trigger finger, she and her squadron had seen no enemies of the sort of which to shoot, which was pretty much the whole reason any of them decided to leave the safety of their encampment.
For about an hour or so, they trekked through the grassy fields, the Octotroopers spreading violet ink as they hovered across the ground. Staring at the skies, the Octoling in charge could not help but stare at the clouds cast just above her,, treading through the empty lands full of grass. Eventually, she stopped, glanced around, the other Octarians halting just behind her.
"Hmm." Glancing around, she sat down, her Octoshot at her side.
"...Commander?" One of her Octotrooper companions spoke up curiously.
She turned back with a straight face, staring at the Octotrooper in question. The formation broke immediately, Octarians clearing the area aside from one curious Octotrooper. She walked up to the one remaining Octotrooper, leaning down at the smaller octopus creature. He shuffled uncomfortably on his platform, attempting to keep a nervous staring contest with the ground suddenly.
"Hypothetical question. If your friends were to fall off of a cliff, would you?" The Octoling commander asked, leaning in as if she only wanted to unnerve the Octotrooper even more than he already was.
With a question like that, the only answer she got was silence. Beads of violet sweat dripped down the Octotrooper as she gave him the evil eye. Even through the barrier of steel that was the Octoling Goggles she wore on her face, the Octotrooper could practically feel her irises tearing into him. All he managed was a weak cough, glancing away yet again.
"The answer is obviously a no." She spoke up, patting him on the head, "Why should you delve down into the frigid waters?"
The other Octarian troops ducking behind the hills simply nodded and murmured in agreement.
"However." She shouted, the Octotroopers edging closer curiously, "If we are to win this war, we may have to take risks. That isn't to say that we will fall and drown. But rather, prevent it from happening in the first place. Finding M-41 will not be easy. But in war, sacrifices are necessary"
That reasoning only spooked the Octotrooper. He shivered, gasping in and out as if to calm down his beating hearts.
She turned back to the Octotrooper, leaning in. "And guess where we sit now? Two parties, brawling against each other. There are going to be casualties, regardless of how careful we are."
The reality slowly began sinking in. Panic erupted, and suddenly paranoid Octotroopers aimed their weapons to and fro, looking for the sign of any colored tentacles. Shaking her head, the Octoling whistled, attracting all attention to her once again.
"Alright, now with that being said, who still wants to help me find one Octoling?" She asked, rubbing her hands together.
A few of them just stared at each other. Reaching a mutual conclusion, they began scuttling off on their mobile platforms, nervously. Behind them, the Octoling simply shrugged, walking through the hills, the other Octarians just shooting them apologetic stares as they followed her through the grass. As the others retreated, they stopped suddenly, watching as their commander slowly faded into the distance, the Inkling city looming over the horizon like a terrible reminder that anything could go wrong.
Shaking her head, the Octoling turned towards the remaining octopus squadron at her side. She was somewhat surprised to see that only a single cephalopod besides herself remained. A lone Octotrooper shivered, she recognized him as the lone, curious but stared up bravely, keeping his tentacle on the controls to keep it steady.
The commander smiled. "Glad you could tag along. Come on, before they get through the others."
She started walking away with a jolly old jog as if she were a school teacher who had gotten over with a lecture. Before the Octotrooper could argue, he simply sighed, shaking his head. Driving his platform, he followed her away. As he drove, he neglected to notice the sound of splashing in the distance as he and the commander strode off to find their other Octoling companion.
"An Octoling?" Ophi asked, sitting on an interchangeable hill, "So, someone like us, except...?"
"Something like that. Shooed her away, but I'm not sure for how long." Phish sighed, shaking his head.
The squadron of three sat on an indistinguishable mound of dirt and grass, with Rinse staring at the sky yet again whilst Ophi and Phish exchanged stories of war, bamboo weapons at their side. Portic, meanwhile, was frolicking through the grass with the enthusiasm of a snail, waiting for them to finish their tales of combat as he circled around, whistling some tune to pass the time.
"There's no one guarding the camp, then." Ophi sighed, staring off back into the distance.
Phish bit his lip. "Right."
"Well, if that's the case, we'd better get back." She said, getting up to her feet, dusting off her raggedy uniform.
"Hold on!"
Staring down the side of the hill, Ophelia noticed Portic scrambling up the hill, switching to a squid to hop up the grass onto the top. Reverting back to his regular Inkling form, he shook his head. (as well as gasp for air from that intense frolicking)
"We're leaving for the camp?! Come on, really? With a hundred octopuses probably charging towards us? We should be out there, looking out, beating some octopuses, not stay here and wait." Portic frowned, crossing his arms.
"Well, isn't that our job?" Ophi asked, rubbing the back of her neck.
"...Yeah, but it's a dumb job. Now that I think of it, why did they leave four teenagers in charge of a camp? Why are we the ones who have to deal with all of this? Is the Earth flat?" Portic asked, rattling off question after question.
Shaking her head, Ophi leaned back on the grass. "Let me stop you right there. The commander and the others are out there right now. They're fighting on the front lines, we are the reserves. If you wanted to go, you should've gone when you had the chance!"
He simply pouted and held his head high, Ophi crossing her arms.
"...Does it matter what shape the Earth is?" Rinse arched an eyebrow, glaring at Portic suspiciously.
"We're getting off topic guys. The point is, we just need to hold our ground here until they return. Nothing else." Ophi spoke firmly, closing her eyes in a "matter-of-fact" way.
When she opened her eyes, she met Phish's brown irises, which blinked, staring behind her. No one else. Glancing to the side, she noticed two Inklings; one lean, one practically a statue, walking off. With a smile, Portic glanced towards her, gave her a curt wave, and went along his merry way with Rinse following shortly behind. Frowning, Ophi stood up.
"That's the second time today. This better not be a recurring theme." She grit her beak, "C'mon Phish."
Holstering her Bamboozler, the female squad member slid down the hill, scraping the grass lightly. Walking off, she followed the other two, albeit somewhat reluctantly. However, even more reluctant than Ophi was the only other troop in her team, Phish. Turning around, she scowled, the other Inkling sticking to the hill like glue.
"Phish, you too?" She asked, hands on her hip.
"...Someone needs to stay behind." He shrugged, looking in the other direction.
"Ugh. Right," Ophi shook her head, walking off, "But if you do spot another octopus, you'd better find us."
Finished, Ophi continued her descent down the hill, grumbling something incoherent. The three of them climbed over hill and yonder, ditching the Inkling. Sighing, Phish laid back on the hill, staring up at the sky above. Blue backgrounds, white clouds, and an Octoling who-
"JEEZ!" Phish yelped, falling down the hill, his blue tentacles getting stained with green as an Octoling watched, tapping her finger on the grass.
"Are you done?" She asked, tilting her head as he reached the bottom, one hand placed on her cheek.
"Agh…" Phish rubbed the back of his head, cocking one eye up angrily, "Mai?!"
Mai smiled sweetly. "Aw, you remembered my name! How sweet is that?"
"What are you doing here?" He asked, rising to his feet.
"Well, I was supposed to splat any Inkling defense I came across." She began, staring down at Phish, "But something came up, and amidst the chaos I lost my gun."
"Oh for- Here, have it back." Phish sighed, reaching at his side, pulling out the Octoshot.
"No, keep it. Just- Just try and keep it." She waved them off.
Phish's eyes narrowed. "...What are you doing?"
"I mean, since you seem to be so fond of it, I think you should keep it." Mai put simply.
"You literally just said that you lost your gun." Phish deadpanned, hand still offering the Octoshot.
"Mm-hm, but if you gave it back to me, who's to say that I won't splat you immediately?" She asked with an eyebrow cocked.
"You will, probably." He grumbled, holstering the Octoshot of determinable ownership, "Seriously, WHY are you here?"
"Okay, so I just saw your friends head off, right?" She pointed out, over in the general direction they had taken, "That leads to one of the Octarian encampments. Nothing huge, like the headquarters itself."
Phish scoffed. "They're going to get themselves krilled."
"...I was just getting to that." She blinked, frowning, "But it doesn't look like you care about their well being."
He simply shrugged. That seemed to amuse her slightly, a smile creeping up on her face.
"Mr. Edgelord over here. So, you seriously don't care about the lives of others?" She asked.
Scowling, Phish glared at her incredulously. "What? No! But if they're going to do something stupid, then why should I follow them?"
The Octoling's smile practically dropped down into the depths of discomfort just from hearing that line. Pouting, she leaned on the side of the hill, only confusing Phish more when that was her answer. The male Inkling frowned, glaring at her for quite some time.
"...Can you stop being ambiguous and just give it to me straight?" He narrowed his eyes.
"Alright," She cleared her throat, "Go after them."
"What?!" His eye twitched, "No!"
"Okay, then you go after them and help them." She spoke simply, folding her arms, laying her head down.
After that strange exchange, all Phish could manage was a sour expression. Try as he might, he had difficulty gauging what exactly Mai was playing at. She was technically his enemy. He was technically at war with her. But both of them were technically passive in terms of their fights. His first fight had ended up in both of them surviving. So there they were, standing under the blue sky, Phish with a weapon at his side, his enemy disarmed in front of him, prime for shooting where she laid in the grass.
Funnily enough, the thought of shooting her had not crossed his mind, only that she was acting absolutely ridiculous.
"...You really want to be in the right." He stated, glowering at her with crossed arms.
She shrugged, switching into an octopus, face staring directly upwards. "What can I say? I'm an altruistic spirit at heart."
"Yeah, that's debatable." Phish thought to himself, shaking his head, "Whatever. I'll find them."
Though he had just a bare idea of where Ophelia, Portic, and Rinse could have skedaddled off to, walking across the lumps in the fields, leaving Inkopolis, the camp, and Mai in the dust. The Octoling blinked, switching back into a humanoid form, grinning. She got up, slid down the hill, and followed behind from a distance, the two of them trekking off into the distance, with naught a concern for the camp, nor their lives, as one grumbled while the other held a impish smile.
They went on, convinced that it would be at least interesting to watch.
"Hmm! You know, from up here I can see quite far." Portic stated, swerving his head around, "This is great! It's like a watchtower up here."
"Glad you're enjoying it." Rinse spoke up to Portic, grunting as he walked.
The lighter Inkling nodded. "Yeah. Watch out octopuses, we have the UPPER HAND!"
Portic said, as he stood on top of Rinse's shoulders, the heftier Inkling holding him up, staring down at the grass below. Behind them, Ophelia dragged along, still cautious, and still irritated at the two. Eventually, Portic swung around, catching her face in his sights.
"Whoa! Stop right there, soldier!" Portic shouted, patting Rinse on the head, who halted immediately, "Grumpy Inkling alert, six o'clock!"
"Knock it off Portic." Ophi sighed, staring at the ground.
"Look, we've been over this. Rinse and I are just going to scout out the area ahead, if you don't want to come, just hang back with Phish." Portic spoke up, swiveling back, pretending to use his hands as binoculars.
Ophi could not help but give the lightest smile she could muster in face of the goofball. "Not if you're going to continue making a bigger target of yourself."
"Nah, look, this gives ME the tactical advantage." The other Inkling told her, pulling out his Bamboozler, looking over the wooden barrel, glancing about the fields, "This is the most optimal position I could possibly be in!"
Despite her mood and stance on the other two venturing forward, Ophi could not suppress a giggle as Portic met a branch facefirst, which was quite the formal approach for a pair who had just met. Stopping in front of the tree which found a liking to his teammate, Rinse blinked, staring ahead. There laid a thicket, light with trees and a few shrubs, but a thicket nonetheless, doing enough to obscure the way ahead. He grunted, catching his squadmate as he fell from grace and almost onto the ground, setting him on the grass.
"...So many trees in the middle of an endless plain." He murmured, staring at the plants.
"What? Is there something wrong with that aside from the fact that they're in the way?" Portic grumbled, rubbing his forehead.
"It isn't unheard of." Rinse told him, hardly taking his eyes off of the trees.
"Freakin'... Rinse, I am going to think of you as a living vegetable if you keep making those observations." The other male Inkling sighed, arms at his side.
Ophi hummed, staring up at the tree tops, thick platforms of leaves offering shade. "Huh…"
"We can use this as cover." Rinse spoke up, "If there are more Octarians, then this is a good spot to stay put and observe."
"Does that mean no more standing on your back?" Portic inhaled sharply through his beak, "I dunno… Kinda a deal breaker."
"...You can sit in a tree if you like as long as you don't bother any wild animals." Rinse told him, to which Portic's eyes lit up at.
"Alright, makeshift treehouse, here I come!" Portic spoke up, pounding his fist down on an open palm.
Ophi felt a bead of sweat drip down her face as she watched the spritely Inkling climb up into the canopies above them, rustling the trees as he crawled through them.
"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Ophi asked, glancing around.
Rinse turned to her, giving her a look that seemed as though he would react explosively. For a moment, Ophi had wondered if she had offended him in anyway, and was ready to point out the pros of squatting in leaves.
However, his response practically took the wind out of her sails. "...If this is too much for you, you can always hang back at the camp."
A rustling in the trees followed, with Portic popping out of the canopy. "Ooh! Goodness me, I could feel that from here!"
Ophi frowned, glaring at Rinse, who simply shrugged in response. Stomping over to a nearby tree, she grappled the nearest branch and started climbing, Portic cackling as he reentered the brush. Through all of their shenanigans, a pair of orbs lit up in the shade of the small forest while they crawled about the small collection of trees, glaring back at them menacingly.
AN: HMM FORESHADOWING EH?
But in all seriousness, I'm having quite the blast with writing this story. Most of my other stories have little cohesive plots that are mostly strung together by random action. And that's all fine and good, but I feel as though this is actually my first attempt at writing a story that has a grain of sense to it.
Well, in the context of Splatoon at least.
But we can talk about that another time, what about reviews? Thanks Ultrapyre and Guest for reviewing!
Right, I still agree with Ultrapyre on the whole, "satire on wars" type of deal. But I also believe that this war, no matter how silly in concept it is, still seems as though it could have some serious themes and implications if it tried. I mean, just look at those disturbing noises someone found in Octo Valley when beating the final boss, it makes sense that not all interactions with squids and octopuses are gonna be 100% safe, and while I don't believe you were implying that entirely, it still helps to have a bit of a sane base to work off of that spirals into a bit of crazy gameplay, right?
Guest, or at least the recurring guest, I appreciate that idea. I doubt what I am going to do here is going to mirror the exact actions of Splatoon because Phish, Ophi, and everyone else that isn't a direct character from the game is definitely not canon, so the "unplugging of the Octoweapons" may be a little more complicated. Or it could push it out of the way altogether, who knows? I like that you believe that stories like mine can help fuel the fanbase to keep it chugging along, I appreciate postive outlooks like that. Certainly helps.
Well, that's all for today, this is ThePizzaLovingTurtle, it's midnight and I should go to sleep. See you.