"Welcome to baby and me 101!" A red-haired woman in a white scrubs shouted at all the couples and soon to be parents in the room. Marinette and Adrien were staring holes into the back of their parent's heads for being here. It's not that they didn't want to be here, they just wished it was on a better term.
"Today we will participate in a series of activities to see if you're ready for your newest arrival! Once you get a certain amount of starts, you get to go home with a certificate of being a prepared parent." The lady said, Marinette looks down to her purse to see a pair of blue eyes staring up at her. Sticking her hand into her bag, the tiny creature hands her a small piece of lemon candy, something our blue haired girl craves during her pregnancy.
"One thing we don't do is eat candy." The lady said, appearing right behind Marinette. She almost caused the girl's spirit to leave her body.
"Hm?" Marinette asked. She was somewhat hell bent on not giving up her lemon bites.
"Candy before birth can cause ADHD, like coffee and many other caffeine-related foods. The sugar in your body can make it do horrible things. That's why we recommend soon to be mothers to eat only veggies and fruits." The lady said. In a panic, Marinette spits the candy straight into the trash can…from her seat in the third row.
"She does that." Adrien said with a smile.
"Oh yes, what does she eat?" The lady asked.
"We eat most vegetable dishes with a side of fish sometimes. We only eat meat twice a week and try our best to stay away from wheat things." Marinette responded. The Lady smiles at their words.
"Very good!" She says before continuing their lecture. Marinette sighs in relief before hearing her mother gloat to her father in law about that was her idea.
"Ugh, I feel like puking." Marinette moaned.
"If you need too, you can puke on my father." Adrien whispered into her ear, making Marinette chuckle.
"Now, what do we do when a baby is teeth? Bluenette?" The teacher asked, making Marinette smile disappear.
"Oh, whiskey on the gums?" Marinette said. Seconds later she was greeted by sighs and mean words of muttered. The lady in white said:
"Um, we don't do that anymore. Studies have proven that exposing a child to alcohol at a young age leads to alcoholism in the future. Not to mention if the baby takes to much, it can develop a sore throat." The lady said. Marinette felt like a bug at this point.
"Oh…" She said.
"Another question: What types of cribs are best used to help a child sleep in the night?"
"Uh…" Marinette responded.
"What is the best way to help a child sleep through the night?"
"Lay it on its stomach and put down pillows so it know's it's secure and safe?" Marinette said…or morally asked.
"Will you be bottle feeding your child, or breastfeeding?"
"We don't know that one." Marinette said, gaining a gasp from the class. Marinette was blushing ear to ear in shame as Adrien tries to calm her down.
"See, this is what's wrong with the word. You people getting pregnant in this day and age without the single knowledge on how to keep a child alive. Did you even think this through? You're bringing a life into this world, not a piece of technology that you can tap away on your phone to control. And bottle feeding? Do you want to give your child autism?"
"N-no! Its just I have a job and I may not be able to breastfeed all the time." Marinette said in a panic.
"Oh, and the working mom puts her career before her child. Another thing that is wrong with parents today." The lady said, making Marinette's heart sank to her stomach.
"I didn't mean it like that!" Marinette shouted. At this point, Adrien came into the picture. Standing from his seat, he looks the woman straight in her brown eyes to say:
"My wife isn't going to do all the work! Obviously, for common sense reasons, I am going to help her! And, how dare you lecture us on the values of a family! My wife and I are doing quite fine, thank you! So, why don't you do your job and teach us that crap WE'RE PAYING you to do!"
"I…wait a minute…do I know you?" She asked. At this moment, Adrien and Marinette begin to grabs their stuff in a hurry. Sadly, they weren't fast enough because a woman in the class shouted:
"That's Adrien Agreste and Marinette D-C!" A lady said, making the sigh. The lady in red gasp at the sight of them.
"Oh my god, I have celebrities in my class!" The lady in red shouted. Marinette by this time was walking out of the room, her parents soon followed. It took a while, but Adrien was finally able to get Marinette home. And once there, Gabriel demanded answers. Especially when he found a WIKI page of Marinette.
"So, when did you become a big shot in America?" Gabriel asked the young woman as she takes a seat on her couch. Adrien and Sabine head to the kitchen to get her something to eat while her father messaged her shoulders.
"I helped out with this TV show in America about drag queens. I create costumes for the some of the characters. Then a superstar appeared on the show and wanted one of my designs. This led to me being the head designer for a fantasy movie that sold big. Then because of the theme, they wanted me to make a clothing line for them. Long story short, I am known in the TV world. Which somehow led to game designs…then me actually appearing in games. Its weird, America takes looks to a whole different level. Did you know Adrien and I have appeared in three Ubisoft games?" Marinette said with a chuckle. But that didn't seem to amuse Gabriel. He looks over to his son.
"And what do you do?" He asked.
"Believe or not, I am a voice actor. And sometimes Marinette's model for things." Adrien said with a smirk (I don't know why, but I think Adrien would make a funny voice actor if he had the job).
"Awww, that is so cute. You guys work together!" Sabine said.
"Yep, Marinette introduced me to voice acting. I currently have a contract with Naughty Dog for an upcoming game. They're using my features and everything." Adrien said with a smile.
"I'm glad you found something your good at that pays you. But let's not forget the fact that you two don't even know how to keep a baby alive. Let alone answer simple questions." Gabriel growled before his attention moves from Adrien to Marinette. "I agree with the teacher. You will not formula feed that child."
"You mean my child?" Marinette asked in a sarcastic way.
"My future grandchild that you have no knowledge about. Especially the common ones. Your teacher isn't the greatest." Gabriel said, ignoring Sabine's glaring eyes.
"Okay, so I have made a couple mistake…" Sabine said in shame.
"A couple?" Gabriel growled.
"But that doesn't mean I can't help them!" Sabina growled.
"Yes it does, because from now on I will be taking over." Gabriel said. Adrien walks over to the liquor cabinet in search of a drink as Tom and Marinette stare at each other with worried faces. Sabine, on the other hand, was producing enough bad energy to choke a cow.
"Dad do something…" Marinette muttered.
"Nope, just let it be." Her father said. By this time Adrien has poured himself a shot to calm his nerves.
"First, Marinette and I will go to the local bookstore and buy every book on this subject. Then I will call in some people to baby proof this house." Gabriel started, much to Adrien's annoyance.
"You want to baby proof an already baby proof house." Adrien asked.
"Yes, in case you haven't noticed, your staircase has no protection on its side. What if your child decided to crawl out of its room and go down the stairs. One slip of its hand or feet could make grandchild either fall to its death, or twist its neck while falling down your wooden steps." Gabriel said to his son.
"Eep!" Marinette shouted as she imagines the horror.
"And don't forget about curtain strings, the kitchen, her workspace and even the bathroom, where most deaths of toddlers happen." Gabriel said. Marinette's face was practically purple from horror at all the bad things that could happen to her unborn child.
"I don't want my baby to die!" Marinette shouted before bursting into tears. All the thing Gabriel said was making Marinette terrified for her child's life while Adrien was getting annoyed.
"Oh my god dad! Please, would you stop!" Adrien shouted at his father. "We will re-baby proof this house so that idiots won't hurt themselves, alright!"
"Good, also, Marinette! I will make sure you have drug free birth." Gabriel said. It was then Sabina had to step in.
"No! Trust me, you need medication!" Sabina shouted.
"Medication has been proven to affect a baby when they are in delivery." Gabriel said. "Don't you want a healthy baby Marinette?"
"I do! I don't anything bad to happen to my baby!" Marinette shouted.
"Marinette, listen to me! A woman that has actually brought a child into this world…" Sabine started. "You will be in so much pain that you will probably plan a way to kill your husband!"
"Well…I don't want to kill Adrien. I put too much effort into getting him." Marinette said.
"And I am honored." Adrien said.
"I need to think about that part." Marinette said. Both Gabriel and Sabine nod their heads at her words as Marinette looks over to the ground.