*This is a short chapter including Ethan being adorable and Rollie being, well, Rollie. I hope you guys enjoy!
Chapter 16 - What are You Waiting For?
A few days later Ethan had been moved downstairs to a more comfortable room and he was starting to feel much closer to normal than he had before. He was still bored out of his mind, especially since he was still unable to get around much. He had eventually convinced Leanne to bring him something to do, and that took much more convincing than it should have. And even then, she had showed up with crossword puzzles! He had wanted patient files to read and update, or charts to check, hell at this point he'd read over fucking policy changes for her. He just wanted something useful to do. Something to keep his mind from wandering off into that gray area where he was still unsure whether he would make a full recovery. Where he still didn't know if would get full use of his hand back. A place he didn't want go to. Not now. Not ever.
And then there was the fact that his mind kept taking off in the direction of a certain proposal he was trying to plan. He was still milling things over in his head. He had done the most important part, he had a ring. The simple infinity band, covered in small diamonds, had been the first one that caught his eye. And the sales lady had tried desperately to get him to consider other, more traditional, options. But he hadn't budged. As soon as he had seen it, he knew it was the one. And he had paid for it right then and there, leaving the store with the small velvet box in the pocket of his jeans.
He had carefully hid it in his sock drawer that night when he had gotten home, knowing full and well that Leanne was at work. It had sat there for a few days before he transferred it over to his back pack, insuring that he had it with him at all times. He had even pocketed the ring itself a few times, thinking that the right moment might strike him. But he had never felt the spark. That moment. They said he would know when the perfect moment was to get down on one knee, if he was even physically capable of that he didn't even know. And yet, nothing. Sure he knew he wanted to ask her. He wanted her to be his wife more than anything in this world. But he wanted the moment to be special. She deserved that much.
"Penny for your thoughts." He heard Rollie's soft voice from the doorway and he offered the older man a smile before motioning for him to enter the small room. Rollie had been great the past few days, and he had come by to check on Ethan almost every day, for which the Colonel was extremely great full.
"Ha. I don't think they're quite worth that much." Ethan let out a soft chuckle and moved himself to sit up in the uncomfortable bed. He hated this damn thing. The mattress was hard and the pillow was too flat and because of the damned IV they still insisted on, he couldn't sleep in any position other than flat on his back. Which was now sore. As was his butt. And he hated it.
"I find that hard to believe." The doctor offered him a soft smile and sat down in the chair next to the bed before speaking again. "Care to share what's troubling you son?"
Nodding his head Ethan closed his eyes for a second, opening them back up and looking the older man in the eyes. "I wanna propose to Leanne."
Rollie let out a chuckle and patted Ethan's hand gently. "I know son. We all do."
"No." Ethan let out a soft sigh and closed his eyes once more, trying to gain the courage to have this conversation out loud. Sure Rollie was his colleague, one of his best-friends even, but he still didn't know if he could talk to him about this. He didn't know if he could talk to anyone about this really. "I mean, I wanna do it now. Or soon at least?"
Nodding his head, the older doctor leaned back in his chair, his arms relaxing by his side as he eyed the younger man curiously. "How soon?"
"How soon do you think I can get the hell out of this damn place?" He knew his question came out harsher than he intended, but Rollie didn't seem to mind. "It's just, after everything we've been through, I just feel like it's time. I mean, I've had the ring for a month and I've never had the urge to actually ask, but now. Now I just want to get it done."
"Does this have anything to do with Jesse's comment the other night?" The older man knew that Jesse had been joking, but by the blushes that had crept over the pair's faces, he was certain that there was more truth to it than they wanted to admit.
"Yeah." Rubbing his hand over his face he let out a chuckle. "I mean, he's right. We have kind of done all of the hard shit together already. All that's really missing is a house and a baby right?"
Rollie let out another soft chuckle and nodded his head. "You would be correct my dear friend."
"So I should do it right?" Ethan knew he wanted to do it. He knew with every fiber of his being that he wanted to ask her the most important question in the world. But he didn't know how receptive she would be to the whole idea. She had been married once before. She'd already had a fancy wedding and gone on a nice honeymoon. She had already done the white picket fence, two kids, and a dog thing. He didn't know if she would be ready for all of that again. "Do you think she's ready?"
Sighing, the other doctor reached out and patted Ethan's arm. "Do you think she's ready?"
This conversation was becoming more than Ethan had bargained for and he let out a choked sob, tilting his head back against the pillow, willing the tears away. "I hope she's ready." He opened his eyes again and turned back towards his friend. "But I don't know if she is. What she's been through. Losing everyone like that. I don't know if I have the right to ask her to replace all of that with something new."
"She wouldn't be replacing it Ethan, you know that." He squeezed his arm this time, offering him a sympathetic smile and soft eyes. "She loves you. I think she knows that if you two stay together this would be the inevitable outcome."
Ethan nodded his head again and sighed once more. "I don't know Rollie…"
"You know who you need to talk too?" He asked softly, his eyes growing some at the thought of how the suggested conversation would go.
"Leanne?" Ethan figured that was the obvious answer.
Rollie shook his head back and forth with a soft laugh, letting go of Ethan's arm as he stood. "Jesse." He said wisely, pointing at Ethan as he made his way to the door. "Ask Jesse, he knows everything."
Chuckling at the older man's answer, Ethan nodded his head as he replied. "Will do.
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